UK anons, any tips for passing a driving test first time?

Oh yeah, you are a bitch to cyclists as well.
Pass nice and wide.
Don't get aggy and try to spook them by going too close to them and giving them the crazy eyes when you go past them like I did. Failed the first time for' Dangerous Overtaking'. Lycra clad cunt.

finger fuck the instructor

w-what if it's a man??

finger fuck the instructor roughly

Should I show off my heel and toe technique

Got my test in less than a month... we can do it user! My instructor says to try to make the examiner as comfortable as possible.

>make the examiner as comfortable as possible
should I bring him some snacks??

try not to sneeze in the instructor's face while backing up
I failed my first test because of that

Yeah but you passed didn't you?

This reminds me of a porn video I watched recently where this British guy was teaching a black chick to drive. She couldn't get the hang of standard transmission, so he offered to just pass her if she sucked some cock.

I wonder if this dyke lady would make him eat her pussy.

He does look rather scared in the pic

Its partially down to luck. my first test someone let me out at a junction and apparently it was a red light. the traffic lights were behind the car so it was my fault for getting tested by a fucking jedi but whatever. Second time i walked it.

also test centres have pass rates so you might drive fine but get failed anyway to show that they're a serious institution/more jew shekels/whatever

Take your penis out half way. See what happens.

>profit?

Don't be a pussy

Blowjob, obviously

Better make sure the blowjob doesn't end in a towjob am I right hehehe

...

>the traffic lights were behind the car so it was my fault for getting tested by a fucking jedi but whatever

Did you approach the junction with your eyes closed? Or did you just fail to look at the light while approaching it?

It's fucking easy, can't believe it takes most people 3-4 attempts. I chatted shit with the examiner the whole time and he missed me doing some really dumb shit like pulling out of a stop in 2nd and failing to indicate. Got 1 minor fault for not pulling up close enough to the curb at the end of the test and I'm sure he only have me that for a laugh.
Just do your dumbass exaggerated head movements and snap your neck off when reversing and checking blind spots while driving confidently and they will pass you.

that look is the lets fuck look, try that

This. The only way to fail is to not care.

The hard part for me was the hazard test on the computer. To me everything moving, potentially moving or distracting is a hazard so on the test CD I kept getting marks off for "clicking too much". Fucking cyclist on a sidewalk is not a potential hazard?

Anyhow if you spend enough time at it you can unlearn reality and get 85% of maximum points on the first real try.

Get a good examiner, which is luck
I passed on my 2nd attempt even though i did worse 2nd try, just the first time the examiner was stuffy old boomer cunt

Do americunts drive automatics in driving tests? If that's the case, you can only fail it if you're mentally disabled.

>UK anons

What don't you have a driving tutor? Also be prepared to fail.

Maybe. Put on the kettle and fetch the biscuits?

Don't say anything critical of the government or, god forbid, islam.

How the fuck does that mirror work?

It can see the truck behind and the the car in front.

I think I hate about drivers test is that it's not realistic. I like don't even 90% of all that shit. I feel doing a full 360 observation is more of a safety hazard than good

Hit as many pakis as you can for bonus points

No its looking at the truck and car that is infront. Extending the drivers view to see around the car infront incase he want's to perform a dodgy overtake. He'll atleast not overtake straight into oncoming traffic

Depends where you are. My area's driving tests are completely under-monitored, so your chances are fairly dependant on whether the invigilator likes you or not.

it was green when i went through it. basically the white line is set back so busses can make the turn (otherwise Veeky Forums would have to walk) so light goes green, i drive off, round the corner and traffic. guy lets me in, i carry on as normal. Apparently it was a red light, about 15 feet behind the car.

the guy looked like karl rove anyway so i was gonna fail. Next test i walked it with 3 minors.

Passed first time with 3 minors 2 months ago.

Had half a can of redbull before to aid concentration

Chatted with the examiner

Costantly checked mirrors

After having 2 hour driving lessons the exam goes really fast since it only lasts 30 minutes. I thought I'd fucked up on the parralel hill park because I had to exit the space and correct, but it didn't matter because my observation was there. Got a minor for breifly doing 25mph in a 20mph zone though, and stalling on the emergency stop (would rather stall than risk getting a major coasting with the clutch)

Honestly, just bring $200 with you and place it on the dash toward the start of the drive. People at the DMV are some of the most corrupt officials in government.

news.com.au/entertainment/music/paulini-could-face-jail-time-over-bribery-charges/news-story/3bfa6b4d7a68ae2afd9e00d2a80d1600

You didn't support your suggestion with the most convincing article

If you read through the article, you'll see she only got caught years after because the person she bribed was involved with other criminal underworld dealings, biker gangs and shit.

The point I was trying to make is that she only paid $800. That's a pretty cheap bribe.

JUST DONT COCK IT UP M8

DRIVING IS SHIT SIMPLE LAD

DVSA examiners will only do it for at least £1k from what I've heard. Though if you need to bribe your instructor you shouldn't be driving a car in the first place.

>risk getting a major coasting with the clutch
My instructor taught me to just slam the brake and clutch in together. It's not coasting if you're on the brake.