Truckerfag Thread - /TFG/

>Just A Couple Of Completely Normal European Port Drivers Out For A Leisurely Stroll Edition

Brevious Bread: >44 tonnes of anti EF posts
>34 tires stuck in two feet of Siberian mud
>CDL How Do? Community college, private driving school or yvan eht nioj
>Signed lease bring great shame to family name
>Swift: Best In Oncoming Lane
>Prime:Sixty five billion drivers and counting
>Australians are running over kangaroos, camels, and Chinese mineral rights acquisition agents all the time
>Something about black people
>140,000 pounds, Americans, step up your haul game

>Truckerfag is drinking the finest ryewhiskey $14.95 can buy
>EF is spending more time justifying his trucking career than actual trucking
>Bepis just rode his scooter down to the market for a fresh baked baguette and some lovely French chevre, his jaunty scarf blowing in the breeze
>Oilfag and Swampbro got dirty, then got clean, then got real greasy (cleaning and then working onthe truck, pervs)
>Doublesfag let his wife drive hopped up on merlot and cocaine and is now kill
>GravelGuy is taking a giant brown dump as you read this
>Whiney decides to ease into oilfield trucking by hiring on with the single largest well services company in the world
>Gundam has put on so many miles N I G H T D R I V I N G he doesn't remember what the sun looks like
>Balam gave his engine bay that rich, oiled look
>ZF is listening to Counting Crows, thinking about a cuddly,cat-loving ginger boy she used to know
>Primefag died from dissentary after eating discount truck stop Thai food
>PTL is sitting in his half submerged truck in the ruins of Houston waiting to be rescued by a fat Texan sheriff in a jon boat

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U fucking faget

>First post saltiest post

If you bost a good photo of your Pete or your brothers Kenworth without a bunch of filters and you/your cute nerd in the shot, I will use it for the op post on the next thread.

...

>get pulled over in oregon on i84
>trooper starts a random inspection, guess he was bored
>standing on my steps picking through my elog
>Starts to rain
>BOOM MOTHAFUCKA
>Lightning hit a house not even 100 yards away
>Transformer next to house on fire, throwing huge showers of sparks
>Nothing but dry grass and ranch houses for miles, rain too light to accomplish anything
>Trooper scribbles out the rest of the inspection sheet and gives it to me, says I'm good
>Drive away as the world burns behind me
>Most productive 90 seconds of my month

Try actually including the word "truck" anywhere in your post next time, fucking retard

I was on that jetboat ride up the Rogue River and had a real similar experience. BOOM- lightning hits about 200 yards up the hill, then we get hammered by 1/2" hail for 20 minutes as we tried to speed away.

Have any of you banged a lot lizard?

We in full hurricane mode!

Ran around with a trailer full of water but then refused to take another truck out. People will now die of dysentery after the hurricane because I had to go home and get ready for this first date.

Now it just shifted south again. Please Irma, go kill lots of Haitians in Haiti instead of hitting here.

No one likes you, sack breath

>he works on LABOR day
cuck

what

You're my bitch.

Get a load of this 4wheeler
Nah, I just dismember and distribute the parts cross-country like a respectable professional.

Nice

Not only I'm not a trucker but I'm also not a native english speaker and I know what a lot lizard is,what's your excuse?

Overtime pay.

Here in the UK, if you're contracted on a national holiday but choose to work it anyway, you not only get paid overtime BUT get the day of holiday back to be booked elsewhere.
The company I work for just treats them as extra days of holiday, and you book the lot at once.

> Avatarfagging
> But with cute anime catgirls
I'll allow it. For now.

s-sorry

Well I hope that brown cooch is worth it.

Forgot to mention santa dropped in at the bar. He runs Fed Ex doubles to Idaho in the off season.

>Not working on a commie holiday

It's like you hate America or something

I'm an ass clause during the holidays
And I drive that ass
Doubles, triple, hazmat

>What do you say we slip into a room and you two split me open like a coconut?
youtube.com/watch?v=-U1yb7PQw4o

>doubles, triples, hazmat
post proof of you hauling any of these or youre a filthy liar as well as a lame flatbedding pleb.

>yes goy work for that 1.5pay! you're helping your country's economy grow!
Imagine being so indoctrinated by your jewish overlords that you WANT to work when everyone else is off.

Is 1.5X all americans get?

Its 2.5X plus having the entitlement of the public holiday for a later date here.

Imagine being so nurtured by living at home with Mommy and Daddy for all these years that you don't understand how money works, or that people willingly word hard in order to get ahead and provide for their families, and the idea of work to you is such anathema that you like to pretend its a Jewish conspiracy as opposed to coming to the realization that you are nothing more than a lazy, bloated, entitled parasite.

>Brembo brakes on what looks like an otherwise stock Dodge Avenger

Y tho?

>Another one fell for the 'muh Avenger is a sports sedan' meme
F

is that one of those plastic brake covers?

Imagine being jewishly indoctrinated that you actually defend an argument that chastises somebody for wanting to take their hard earned holiday off. Stay shilled, goy.

That's a Dodge Dart, mate.

That's even worse. That'd be like me putting a spoiler on my Cruze and neon lights underneath

Truckers know how to bang.
>Source: I took no dick but trucker dick for 10 years

The only double or triple hazmat you have had is multiple pozzed cocks in your ass.

Uh brakes are functional you stupid cunt

It's not like he's ricing his car, Brembo is vastly superior to the stock brakes. I think it looks cool. Also, unnecessary wings and neon lights are cosmetic mods, aftermarket brake calipers aren't.

Unlike you.

Doubles, triples, hazmat is almost entirely daycab company cuck shit. Are u serious? Stepdeck is GOAT and I am a modern day slave owner. Instead of slaves however. It's ass. And I own ur ass and every other user in this sick experimental thread

Sure buddy.

Do you miss the taste of daddys biddy?

Upgrading brakes without upgrading rubber does nothing. OEM brakes are plenty strong enough to lock the wheels. Sure higher quality brakes will give you less fade but you shouldn't be getting fade on your daily driver.

Zoz. I didn't realize that was a thing until you mentioned it. They probably were fakes.

Yeah, you right f@m.

>Wanting to remain in a lower socio-economic category by not voluntarily increasing both one's value to an organization by going above and beyond what is considered the norm, and directly increasing one's net worth by bringing in more money

Its like you want to remain a plebeian forever.

Who says that he didn't upgrade the tires? The rims at least look aftermarket.

>raising another man's child
>is a literal cuck
>calling anyone else plebeian
Hey, gotta work hard to support your whore wife and cuck children amirite? :^)

I mean we could've taken it off but then we would have to work next Saturday and it fucks up the routing for the whole week. Like we have two types of accounts- Pepsi Direct which is restaurants and stuff that place the order over the phone, and pre-sell accounts where a sales rep goes there the day before. So when we take the Monday off, all of the Direct stops from Mon will be pushed to Tues, but the rest of the week is on time and then the pre-sell accounts will all be delayed a day so it messes up the flow of the route. So you will have a direct account and a pre-sell stop right next to eachother that you normally do on Thursday, but with the holiday you will be at the Direct acct on Thurs and then the other one Friday even tho they are right next to eachother.

Little BS holidays like that, we just tell them to let us work so we get paid for an extra day, don't have to deal with a short weekend, and the routes are normal.

Oh man, just got home from a lil coffee break and it's weird. Like this girl really likes me. I mean I could kinda tell already, but hanging out with her it's like she is flattered by me or some shit. Just the opposite of how it normally feels when the guy is trying to impress the girl.

>I'm perpetually angry at Jerry, the guy my mom married after my real dad left to start up that gold mine
>Shut up dick wad, he's gonna be back any day now! He told me so!
>Why did my mom have to marry that jerk? Dad said he'd be back, so why didn't she just wait?
>Jerry is such an asshole, he won't even buy me a car and makes me ride the bus to take my remedial high school courses

Man I think you finally cracked. Never knew you'd project that hard. Anyway isn't it getting late in whatever shithole you live in? Gotta wake up early to make Mr. Shekelberg his next dollar! Maybe he'll give you a bonus to get that little girl something nice. Enjoy her """""love""""" while it lasts. :^)

EVERYBODY IS A KEK!

>You're just a p-p-p-projecting c-c-cuck Oilfag!
>F-f-f-uck you O-O-O-Oilfag! You aren't allowed to have an op-p-p-pinion because y-y-y-y-ou're a cuck!
>I may an anonymous posting busrider, but you're a fucking cuck!

Please say hi to Jerry and your mom for me the next time they make you leave your bedroom to have a family dinner.

>everything he says about me is absolutely true!
>I know! Better call him a busrider, that'll show him!
Sad.

Shutup cuck

Pepsi-American

Go away daddy milk drinker

Yum yum milky daddy juice

Act like a busrider, get called a busrider.

You sure showed me. Please don't call me a cuck again.

You gonna post a good unfiltered photo of your truck or what?

...

That's by and largely representative of the photos you post on here.

Okay
Okay

I just got an awkward boner

Beautiful. Please tell me that glider you want to build will have either a chrome or body match painted moose bumper, and taller stacks.

>TFW we don't have to be on site until 1000 tomorrow
How can I possibly use all this downtime?

Real talk: Veeky Forums passes. Worth it? Discuss.

Breddy gud m9
Only worth if you're constantly on range-banned IPs or just can't be bothered to type in another captcha. Even then, if your IP changes to a Rule 1 b& + v& IP address, you'll have to get it to change to a clear one somehow because the pass doesn't clear that shit.

Veeky Forums needs to fucking drop IP-address-based bans, it doesn't work.

Sounds tempting. I don't get hit with range bans too often, and I'm a phoneposter so I can do a quick reset to get a new ip when it does happen, but I fugging hate captcha.

Yeah IP Range bans on T-mobile were 99% why I caved and got a pass but Captcha was a consideration too. Completing them on iPhone is a pain and the words often get added to the personal dictionary, which is irritating.

>dissentary
>phoneposter
How did autocorrect fail so badly? Also, +5 to Pepsi for Bepis' subtle criticism of Canadian education.

The hell is the op picture

>Gomputers
Ain't nobody got time for those.

>Canadian booklearnins ain't no good
>Autogorrect, you half flailed me four the past dime.

Breddy sure its from a gay pride parade somewhere. Someone suggested it as the op image last thread.

I bet that is exactly the words you used too

Worth it if you wish to spam dbt with harleys and tfg with cabovers

It's Euro truckers welcoming refugees.

>PTL stalls out in rising houston floodwater
>starts floating piss jugs out the window as he sees rescue police approaching his truck in an attempt to deter them pigs away from his rig

can you post more of her, I wish to cum tribute them.

hello fellow road lice, I'm a local driver going out of town for the first time tomorrow. me and one other truck (both 10'6" wide) are gunning for 1600 miles in two days so we can fuck around for 2 days. any tips/general advice for doing OTR stuff? we'll be in daycabs so we're staying in hotels every night.

This will be the inspo for the glider
Tall stacks, herd bumper, and painted drop visor
Only pic of I have of this truck.

>taller stacks
but why? if you're not hauling a reefer or dry van what's the point? I fucking hate the massive stacks on this thing.

...

800 mile days? Hope you're on paper and out west and at night and only going downhill.

on paper yes, headed east but trucks aren't limited and can both do 80 no sweat.

I luv you

>East
You won't survive the DOT out here

>80mph
Even if they can get up to that speed, its extremely doubtful you'll be able to maintain it for 10 hours a day consistently. Increased fuel consumption and resulting stops, other traffic creating bottlenecks, steep uphill grades, police and scales, unexpected delays and plain old fashioned fatigue are all conspiring to make your plan highly unlikely to succeed.

>a steering wheel holding cucknadian talking like he knows OTR in a country he's never driven in

>insecure Amerifail sperging his inferiority complex
I'm sorry logical reason isn't in your favour

>Driving long distances in one country are completely different than in another country
k

>Steering wheel holder
I've driven through conditions and for lengths of time that would make you quake with fear under the blankets in your piss bottle festooned cuckshed, or more realistically, Nana's basement.

Zoz.

>literal steering wheel holder thinks he's on league with the big boys
Don't you have a hotel room to share with your gay butt budy or something?

>on league with the big boys
USA trucking is for nancyboi ranbow truckers. Come haul hamburger in Western Australian outback, no log books and rough as fuck shitty bulldust roads all day and night long, you piss on the road and you get bogged.

This guy speaks truth. I've seen it for myself. Aussie roads are why airseats are even a thing.

>Imagine getting your cock sucked while your airseat is bouncing uncontrollably

I did that to a trucker in conditions like those.

No one's talking to you you inbred criminal.
Got lie on the road and get run over by a road train you bogan fucking DOG.

>Hotel room
Wat. I'm laying in the king sized bed my wife and I share at my house, my dude. I can count on one hand how many days I have stayed out of town with this current job. Did plenty of sleeper living before that though.

god DAMMIT I fucking HATE niggers more than life itself. FUCK NIGGERS

Pepsi dindu nuffin, he a gud boi!

IF YOU DON'T HATE NIGGERS YOU ARE PROBABLY CANADA. NIGGERS ARE CANCRR THEY WILL DESTROYED EVERYTHING

Did you get beat up at a truck stop or what?

>daily reminder that american trucking is literal baby tier trucking
>limping a combined 80000 pounds along at 62mph with an automatic on clear dry pavement does not make you a skilled driver
>cpm is slave pay, and americans should be embarassed to accept it

>

I'm the one running over the boongs m8.

Funfact:
During the 1950's & 60's people would actualy chase Abiriginals off their propery with 4wd's, & it's reported that 'boong' is the sound they make when they hit the bull bar.

How many have you hit? Do you feel any remorse? You're doing god's work

This in my 3DPD waifu.

Why the flattop sleeper? Get a aero/raised roof sleeper and enjoy the room and mpg gainz brah. I had a flattop and yeah it looked sick but after using an aero sleeper on a Western star I wouldnt look back, so much more room and you can stand up to bust a nut on a ho.

Pretty white trash lookin tbqhwy. What trailer park did your dad book her out of?

Pepsi's Latinas are way more sexy

Does anybody else get diesel dick?