Literally the fastest production vehicle on the planet

>literally the fastest production vehicle on the planet
>seats 8
>every vehicle comes equipped with state of the art Nvidia GPU's
Why does Veeky Forums hate this vehicle?

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youtube.com/watch?v=P2_E_NxbC3w
youtube.com/watch?v=AAJWeQFTUXY
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Only cucks drive stock production vehicles. Have fun getting spanked by chad in his lifted duramax.

Stupid faggot

.... and then the durashit breaks down 5 seconds later. lmfao
It's a sedan. Not a track car. 0-60 is the only important day to day metric

>Excuse me user. Why the FUCK haven't you bought one of my cars yet?
How do you respond?

It's not the car, it's the insufferable dickheads that come along with it. I'm all for the live and let live mentality when it comes to cars. Drive what you wanna drive, that's fine by me. But every time it's a Tesla driver, it's
>Muh 0-60 time
>Muh luducris mode
>Muh ipad dash
>Muh eco friendly
>Muh beats lamburgenie
>Muh elon musk
>Muh ELEKTRICIY

and they won't leave you the fuck alone. They feel the need to glorify the car like they need to justify their purchase as if they're not confident in their own decision.

>Why does Veeky Forums hate this vehicle?
because you keep making the same threads

Sperg more

>P-please user. What was it? Why won't you buy my cars? Did I not shill enough on Veeky Forums for you? Please just buy my cars, user. Think of the environment

well it is the fastest. they aren't wrong

*when fully charged

Because I can't buy one for 3k

Bait threads fuck off

BUY
MY
CARS
user
DO IT

still slower than chad. Keep sperging.

youtube.com/watch?v=P2_E_NxbC3w
youtube.com/watch?v=AAJWeQFTUXY

not production

There's millions of those trucks on the road. Millions were produced. Sperg harder. The Tesla is technically a kit car, Which is not production either. Sperg harder.

>2017
>not buying my cars
What are you waiting for, user?

Quick =/ fast, which the Model 3 certainly is not.

Also it's only quick to 60, past that its acceleration is dogshit. It also can't turn for shit and sucks on the track.

Tell me, user. Tell me what I need to do to get you to buy my cars. I sit on this board day in and day out constantly making threads to convince you that my cars are wonderful yet all of you still whole-heartedly reject them. Why is this? Why won't you just buy my cars? Do you hate good cars? Do you hate the environment? Tell me what I must do to bring you to the good side. What must I do to get you to buy my cars?

>0-60 is the only important day to day metric

it literally is
sperg more

Sperg more

Incorrect

>make it light
>make it cheap
>make it smol
>fix the interior and that hideous front end

Sperg detected

Veeky Forums doesn't like cars that are good
you should know this by now

>retard calling me a sperg
Easy way to spot a sperg

>good
Getting to 60 really fast and then getting BTFO at higher speeds before going into limp mode after 30 seconds on a track is not a good car

>lap times have any significance to people who don't track their cars

One 0-60 run is even less relevant. Track times indicate how well a car will handle in spirited driving on twisty roads, which unless you're a citycuck will be something you'd probably do a lot of.

It's interesting how no one ever talks about the 3 that just came out. Is it particularly bad or something?

It also doesn't help that you can only do that 0-60 twice before you have to recharge.

>0-60 is the only important day to day metric

then why bother when a 17 year old squid on a stock second hand 1000cc bike or a serious drag racer in literally any decent modifed car can smoke you eternally for at least a 1/10th the price(even less for a bike)

it's emasculating to drive

>not wanting to feel like your in danger
>not wanting to hear the crackle of a v8 when you change gears near top of rpm band
>not wanting to hear the supercharger whine
>not wanting to feel the vibrations from a hemi

>not wanting to own a car that could violently accelerate at any second without warning

Don't forget the spontaneous violent combustion.

it is

>all these (You)'s

Because you don't sell cars, you sell the rights for people to drive around a vehicle how's powertrain you maintain the rights too control however you see fit, and your endgame is a vehicle sharing program where they don't even get to keep the vehicle.

If you're on the highway a lot 60-100 is going to be a lot more important.

>speed limit is 60mph
>"60-100 is more important"
nope, sperg more

Very funny. 65mph is the speed limit here and leftmost lane is always 80. Plus temporarily going over to make sure you get in a lane you need to won't kill you.

>all these sperges
Have you tried sperging less?

>$99,000k

I realize it's a shitpost but I just felt like pointing that out because 99,000k would be ninety-nine million dollars.

sperg more

thanks bby

>fails maths
>"s-sperg more!"

no one needs more than 200hp, 0-60 times don't matter. not like any of the spergs itt have driven anything faster than their 3k civic. they wouldn't be able to tell the difference

Sperg located

Sperg discovered

>mfw i crack the code

>no one needs more than 200hp...

I just stop reading there.

b-but, muh battery

Is there a way to disconnect tesla from botnet? I'm not comfortable with the idea of my car being "updated" remotely

Incorrect

Having a fast literbike is one thing. Having the skill to launch it properly is quite another. I can beat most bikefags across the intersection when they race each other in my fwd shitbox.

Nobody said anything about the driver.

>>every vehicle comes equipped with state of the art Nvidia GPU's
Does that mean the car will get slower if you update the drivers after it's been out for three years

i said it before and ill say it again tesla drivers today are the Prius drivers of 2007

What the hell goes through your guys' minds honestly?
>retard op replies "sperg more" to everybody
>"hey I better keep replying to this guy, this discussion is really going somewhere."

>want to drive 266 miles to the beach

>can't because you bought a meme car

>donorcycles
>"vehicles"
It's an engine with wheels. Nobody with two brain cells to rub together gives half a fuck about bikes.

Electric cars are LITERALLY the future

CAGERS BLOWN THE FUCK OUT

>Calls it a donorcycle
>Procedes to call other people stupid

OP said vehicles.
Stop moving goalposts

I repeat
>engine with wheels bolted on
>"vehicle"

aside from work trucks and shit i kinda agree

>every vehicle comes equipped with state of the art Nvidia GPU's

How many have burst into flames?

It is by definition, a vehicle
The goalposts are set in concrete, Goldberg

...

its a shit handling gimmick, a one trick pony.
also build quality.
whats the excuse for plastic foot pedals?

>yfw you realize Teslas are a honeypot style trap that are meant to lure numales in and then kill them

Nobody has it. It takes 18-24 months to get it if you order today.

Exactly this. Everything has been building up. Elon needed to establish a brand and get some revenue before he could mass produce his new affordable mass killing machine.
Once he thinks he has enough numales and liberal millennials in his cars, he will press the button and they'll all go up in flames.

The funny thing is, he's one of the few people I could actually see doing that.

Sure thing organ donor.

Yeah, but didn't people pre-order them years ago? They just had a launch event after all, the first preorderers should have them.

Wow that's actually fucking pathetic. I've never even seen a Chrysler do that...

The only revolutionary thing Tesla has actually done is build something even less reliable than FCA.

ive never even heard of a chinese car that has plastic fucking foot pedals, but Tesla managed to do this.
the biggest joke is its actually aluminum on the end of the pedals.

It's a sedan. Not the fastest production vehicle on the planet. The fact that it can't go more than 300 miles reliably without charging for an hour is the only important metric.

/thread

Sorry you're afraid of motorcycles.

>Why does Veeky Forums hate this vehicle?
they cost like 50k minimum and 90% of the country can't afford one
if electric cars are truly the future then tesla needs to produce one that can be sold for less than 10k to compete with throwaway cars like kia, suzuki and hyundai

wrong.

>3k civic

Speaking of, I bet /ourguy/ Shingo would be able to smoke the fuck out of a Model S in his 1994 EG hatch with a couple of simple mods.

Jesus Christ, who the fuck keeps making these tesla shill threads? Go fuck yourself with a cactus op, it a garbage piece of disposable tech, stfu and neck yourself

Tesla isn't doing anything different. GM, Furd, etc will pound you in the ass for flashing your ECU. If they felt like it, DRM violations.

Fastest from 0-60, if you don'y count the atom.

>too dumb to know the difference between fastest and quickest(to a certain metric)

Tesla shills people.

>literally the fastest production vehicle on the planet
oh is that so?

Slower to 60 than the model s

wrong.
porsche 918 is also faster.

model s does it in 2.28. lol. try again

>2.1 seconds
no video. sperg more

If that crazy Boer sells me a SuperHind I'll stop hating me. It can even be an electric one for all I care, but I want my SuperHind.

BRZ is shit, but yeah.

*stop hating him. Although an attack helicopter certainly would give my self esteem a serious bump.

>tesla shills BTFO

A couple rednecks in a garage could build a Lincoln town car that would accelerate faster and ride better for easily under 90K

Give me a turbo LS, super fucking short diff gears and an NA miata, I will show you fucking acceleration.

Unreliable.