/lozg/ - The Legend of Zelda General

>tfw Gorons eventually get pissed and strike back when you keep attacking them

Praise the Goddess of the Sands

So is Link's virginity

Why is this game so good at waifus

because nintendo wants people to suffer over the fact that their waifu isn't real.

It's a staple of the series

Konora but no Buliara or Lukan. Your taste in Gerudo is strange

I don't like her personality and she doesn't make me laugh. She does look good though.

Reminder that Link was literally made for Gerudo cunt.

I'm a fan of Sagessa the girl at the Dueling Peaks Stable that gives you a free elixir.

The random travellers wouldn't be so bad if they weren't Yiga and didn't try to murder you.

that sword is fucking tiny for a gerudo.

The way she runs into the stable with her hands over her head when it starts raining is super cute.

This one got me a few times just because I thought it was Celessa. She needs like a completely different outfit or something. Or at least not have the choker.

You're too picky user. You'll never find happiness if you dismiss every girl that pulls a sword on you.

Neither would I find happiness if I'm dead.

I'll just stick to running around in the desert thanks.

Not with that negative attitude.

if you want interesting personalities and laughs then Tali (seal racer) and Estan (meat fanatic) are you go to Gerudo

I don't think wanting to murder me would be a positive attitude on her part either.

Don't you realize that most of the happiest people in history are dead people?

I wouldn't know. Maybe I should ask Mipha.

I thought we'd established that your average Gerudo would be all 'What are we going to do on the bed?' rather than Amazon pressing you and milking you dry

DELET

>giant eight foot warriors that are utterly naive and lose all confidence in bed

how boring

maybe but it's in character. Gerudo seem very serious about love plus a lot of them seem to want to get the whole finding a man thing over and done with so odds are you're going to be a Gerudo's first and probably last sexual partner.

Only most the Gerudo are that way, you still get plenty of snu-snu bed destroyers like that one in the voe and you class.

She's just being edgy in front of the class. Back in her room she's as shy as the rest.

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PRAISE TO THE GOLDEN GODDESSES

That's an interesting name for Urbosa's tits.

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For the fish lovers

Don't forget about the Tetraforce:
▲ ▲
▲ ▲

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>Ceremonial Trident

So we've had a few attempts at a fully revived Ganondorf but I think this one is the best although his beard isn't luxuriant enough

I WANT TO FUCK FI

It's convenient enough for the shrines to be blamed on the shiekah predicting that Link would need them, but it does kinda minimize the story opportunities. Don't get me wrong, BotW is a great game, but for the next game I'm ready to see a Link that has no idea what he is up against while nobody has prepped anything for him in advance.

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>That pose
It doesn't look like she fell, it looks like she was dry humping the floor.

How does it feel that you can finally be inside Fi in the DLC?

>Zelda's are getting weird quirks.
>They are a xerox of a xerox of a xerox of a line of past Zelda copies once based on Hylea.
>They turn out a tiny bit more wrong with each copy.
>It gets harder and harder to hide their problems.

I don't know, they all seem pretty weird

Maybe even TP Zelda is crazy as hell under that stoic exterior

Secretly a boy. They needed a Zelda, but had trouble producing any daughters. Don't tell Zelda, she doesn't know.

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>TP Zelda was born a man
>King decided that he was in fact a daughter
>never told him otherwise
>all servants are instructed to never tell Zelda
>he grows up legitimately thinking he's a girl

There's always been waifus but now the game makes everyone cute so its even easier.
Plus Link is a hunk so even more people are thirsting after him now

people have tried that before. It didn't end well

How good is her prom date at keeping a secret?

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very but not from Zelda

funny but waste of good art. we've got so much gay art. This game has produced so much art both safe and work safe but the majority of it is useless to me

gays and fujos are cancerous

It's the price we pay for getting Gerudo in this game

Don't bully fujos. Thats how we get all that cute Link art.

I'd like some cute Riju and Purah art as well. Cute Link is fine but only/mostly Cute Link is not

The ratio of Link art to any female art is colossally in favor of Link, which is a shock considering how many cute women there are in this game. Obviously someone needs to get blamed

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there's a seed in the shrine of resurrection?

fuck.

>not Saria being the one waking up link.

ruining my rumination while its at it

BotW Link is a different person, would she really do it even if Saria was a Korok now?

She only liked her own Link and since this Ruto is mentioned as a sage in the Zora monuments, then it means that Saria is also now a sage ghost.

>Urbosa will never sate her appetite with you semen

Somebody filled her up at some point if she had Riju's grandmother

>Somebody filled her up at some point if she had Riju's grandmother
Silly user
I doubt it took only one try

somebody's head must have been crushed between her thighs.

implying Gerudo with their survival dependent on seducing men and the unreliability or poor quality of their supply wouldn't be super fertile as evidenced by those epic child bearing hips

Was an Urbosa teaching Link and Zelda how to fug fic ever written?

We were promised a Riju crushing on Link fic but that hasn't materialised either

>she had Riju's grandmother
Did the game actually say Riju's her descendant?

it's heavily implied

I haven't seen one yet unfortunately, hopefully someone will write one or draw some porn

I have seen a fic of Riju raping Zelda in front of Link though

What the fuck did you just say to me you little shit-blin? I'll have you know I'm the youngest swordsman ever to be knighted and have been involved in innumerable assaults on monster camps, and have over 300 million confirmed kills. I am trained in all forms of combat and am the hero chosen by the sword that seals the darkness. You are nothing to be but another z-target. I will wipe you out with a precision not even the rito champion could match. Think you can get away with saying that to me over the internet? Right now I am contacting my network of sheikah towers all across Hyrule and your location is being targeted for absolute obliteration, so prepare for the storm, moldorm. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing called your life. I can be anywhere anytime and can kill you in over 700 different ways and that's just with the Master Sword. Not only do I have the Blade of Evil's Bane but I have access to the full arsenal of the Hyrule Royal Guard, and that of the Zora, Goron, Rito, and Gerudo, and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the plains of Hyrule. If only you could have known what Hylia-blessed retribution your little comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, I will shit Urbosa's Fury all over you, and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

No, it doesn't, which is odd since Yanubo is specifically mentioned as Daruk's descendant.

However the thunder helm is supposedly passed down by chiefs, so eiither

1) Urbosa is Riju's great grandmother or whatever
2) Urbosa died childless and Riju's great grandmother or whatever took over, or
3))Urbosa wasn't the chief and just had the thundercrown for some reason

I think them being related is a reasonable assumption

What the fuck did you just say to me little voe? I'll have you know I'm the only Gerudo male and have been involved in innumerable assaults on Hylian settlements, and have robbed over 300 million hylians. I am trained in all forms of combat and am the ruler chosen by the Triforce of Power. You are nothing to me but a minor annoyance. I will wipe you out with a ferocity not even a Lynel could match. Think you can get away with saying that to me over the internet? Right now I am contacting my network of Gerudo all across Hyrule and your location is being targeted for absolute obliteration, so prepare for the storm, moldorm. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing called your life. I can be anywhere anytime and can kill you in over 700 different ways and that's just with this trident. Not only do I have the Tri Force of Power but I have access to an assortment of mystical arts, and the military might of the Gerudo, and I will use them to their full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the plains of Hyrule. If only you could have known what retribution your little comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, I will hurl so many deadly volleys over you that you can’t parry them. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

This is your trident tonight.

if people here wanna fuck a sword, i don't see how a trident is any different.

where?

alternatively the thunder helm was specifically Urbosa's and after her death it was made a chief heirloom to honor her position as champion

fanfiction.net/s/12396380/1/The-Slavery-of-Zelda

why thank you

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>Urbosa wasn't the chief and just had the thundercrown for some reason
Maybe just like Link, they were letting Urbosa borrow the Thunder Helm, since she was their Champion.

how the fuck am I supposed to get thought these stupid ice blocks to the Hebra tower? there's nothing even remotely nearby to glide from either