Itt: retarded car things

>The French. Not even once.

>90° V engines

GM managed to pull it off, that says enough on it's own.

>Ford 302
>it's right there by the alternator and A.C. condenser
>super easy to get at
>just a long wrench and it loosens

>has an engine

>timing belts instead of fucking chains
FUCK

YOU

the thing about modern engines with direct injection and timing chains is that they sound like clicky clacky buckets of mechanical chaos

i'd rather have an engine have a little more noise on startup vs having to replace them at a certain interval otherwise the belt might snap causing the engine to eat itself
god damn interference engines

really tho i had a 2.5L duratec V6 that was a little chattery on cold startups but it ran like a fuckin champ.

t. renault clio pro

the screws arent for structure theyre for adjustment and the spring is so it can articulate for adjustment. if it took you 45 min to do one youre retarded. it took me 20 min to do both on my nova.

>mechanical chaos

>not liking mechanical chaos
Telsa shill out

What the other dude said, you really just unscrew the 2 screws and untangle it from the little spring. Would take 45 minutes max to change all 4. With a 20 minute pause.
t. 67 owner too

>in tank fuel pump

Think a K20 would be able to even spool that thing?

>engine has cylinders

I was dealing with rust and some niggerrigged replacement. The screws were there to hold my light on, otherwise the thing wouldve fallen out. I thought it was a little too retarded to be a stock thing.

>splash panel needs a 10mm, 8mm, random torx bit and a hex key before it comes off

> Engine has a spinning dorito

dorito was a mistake

t. pistoncuck

how many boosts does this create

>Plastic water pump
>Saddle back fuel tanks
>Alternator at the bottom of the engine
>Air intake so low it can suck up water if you wade through a puddle
>Eco" shit like catalysts, EGR and so on

>spark plugs covered by intake manifold

Short Nose Crankshaft

>Water pump runs off the timing chain

Timing belts are better. You know when it's coming and can plan ahead financially and you don't have to worry about how diligent thd previous owner was with oil changes.

>air filter housing lid screws into the plastic base and strips the fuck out of it because monkeys worked on it in the past

Lug bolts instead of lug studs

>You know when it's coming
Believe me my timing chain is telling me its due for replacement. Loudly.

>Anything that was previously serviced by Valvoline instant oil change and walmart

GM?

New Beetle

>buy decent belts
>change when you should

It's literally that hard. Timing chains are
The absolute worst to have to fuck with.

The weirdest thing at my local Wal-Mart, they're all pretty decent mechanics with nice vehicles. All older guys, and they've all been there a while. Never had them work on my car or truck, never heard a complaint about them either.

>WHEEL BOLTS

Oil filter between exhaust manifolds and is sideways

>4 wheels

>retarded oil filter locations

Always over top of a curvy transmission/ transaxle mount so it drips everywhere.

Even the Vortec locations piss me off. Fuck they had to put it as close as possible to the curved housing which wraps around 2/3 of the circumference of the filter so most oil filter wrenches don't fit. Yes I bought a channellock multi positional and the Liesle strap wrench it's just annoying considering they have abundant room.

Old Boxer subies as well.

fucking this

what kind of asshole hides basic maintenance items under the fucking manifolds

>have to change headlight bulb
>first step is to jack up car and remove front wheel

>want to check trans fluid level
>need to remove left front wheel

>can’t get full-size spare out from under the back without jacking the back up

If I ever meet a Chrysler engineer, I am going to throttle them.

Someone that wants you to pay to get it serviced.

Toyota.

As a kid I wound up diving straight into car maintenance because lolnomoney

I had to change the oil on a Toyota van because my mom couldn’t afford an oil change.

I burnt te fuck out of my arms doing that.

>oil filter on the side of the engine so when you take it off oil goes everywhere

>change my own oil for the first time
>filter sits sideways on the engine so I didn't even try filling it up with oil, just lubed the seal
>start the engine and almost immediately hear horrible clanking noises for a few seconds while the filter gets filled
Not gonna lie it was just long enough for me to think things are going catastrophically bad

you're supposed to put some oil in those type of filters before putting them back on

>starter directly below intake manifold

Why the hell are you idiots changing the engine oil while the engine is still hot?

The oil is much thinner when warm and drains more completely, as well as faster.

>Front wheel drive

>overhead cam v engine

Except I'm the fucker they're paying to do it. Fuck Toyota's placement, fuck GM's placement, fuck Toyota's stupid paper canister filters as well as everyone else that uses them, fuck VAG's over complicated paper filters, why can't everyone just use the fucking twist on/twist off bulb filters

>>>>>>>>>>>pushrods

But the most of it is not sitting at the bottom of the oil tank as the oil pump does its job to sent it to the top of the engine to lubrificate it.

You're mixing old oil with newer oil and that builds up residues that can clog up the oil pump and the other places where the pilot goes inside the engine.

How the hell you don't know that?

>FULLY
>PLASTIC
>FAILURE-PRONE
>TIMING
>CHAIN
>GUIDES

*where the oil goes.

FFS auto correct

see

you don't change it right after shutting it down

you let it cool for like 30 mins or so before cracking it open

is that a giant micrometer behind it?

No, it's actually a very, very small engine