A rich gay man offers to give you $5000 to fit this to your daily and you have to keep it on for the next 2 years

How do I fit that on my motorcycle?

In my current situation, yes.

>A month's pay to grab onto a clean dildo a few times a day

Worth it

This, or the money needs to be at least in the six digit range for jokes like this to work.
Unless you're from some country where $15k is like five years salary.

stick it to the seat, vertically.

>Unless you're from some country where $15k is like five years salary.
In which case a dildo shifter would probably get you killed

You can it have replaced with a black one but it’s 2x the size of the regular one

The guy offers to buy you any production bike you want, insurance, gas, tax etc included but you have to stick a 6 inch pink dildo to the seat vertically and leave it there, and ride the bike for 2 years

just hide it inside your anus. problem solved

>vibrations make you cum as you redline

...

checkmate faggot

Yeah sure, that looks hilarious. Makes for a great story too.
I'd do it for half if it were a dragon dildo, that's even funnier.
Would just act like it's completely normal while everyone in the car stares at it until someone finally dares ask.

I have tinted windows, so bring it on

what if my dream car already has a dildo shifter?

i baught this but I can't fit it inside me even with lube so I'm going to attach it to the shifter in my miata

I'd do it and refuse to acknowledge it if anyone asked.

Sure, if I'm allowed to ride it.

>$5000 to fit this to your daily and you have to keep it on for the next 2 years.
I have more than one car, but since it is required on whichever car is driven all the time, I would have to say no. I don't mind the 5K but such a shifter would get me fired for sexual discrimination. The women are very quick to file discrimination lawsuits especially if they get fired. So they look around for any sort of evidence that supports their case. An employee with a dildo shifter thus becomes the "life preserver" as the woman and her lawyer hangs onto the dildo as evidence the company is sexually discriminatory.

Thus, even tho I am not discriminatory, that dildo becomes the anvil chained to my leg that drags me down into the Marianas Trench of despair as an unhirable convicted discriminator.

>2 dildos as handlebars

This
t. have a bountiful bad dragon collection

Where do you make most of my year's pay in a month

Use a quick disconnect mechanism so I can take off and put it back on if I'm being audited by said rich prick.

Every Honda Driver would

he'll install a tiny camera in the car to make sure

>rich
>5 grand
>2 years

this could have been a good thread, but you got your numbers wrong. nice try OP

In pretend land

Internet.

...

Do some anal training first and then it'll slide right in.

I'd do it for free just for a laugh desu

>15k a month
>still posts on 4chins
Lmao

>Miata
>poofter
It checks out

Putting a dildo up your butt doesn't make you a poofter

...

$2 million and I have blacked out tints.

Why not? My car has pink leopard seat covers and dice and plate frames and wipers... and 3D-printed penises for valve caps. IDGAF. Make it $10k and I’ll have a 2 foot black one in its place.

I'd do it, and then head up to Connecticut or where ever those Haggard Garage fags are and beat them around Limerock with my Sick Gnarly Long Throw Drifter Shifter™

$5000/730 days is about 6.85/day

I mean, that'll buy me a fast food lunch per day?

>5000 bucks
Eh sure why not.

>only 6 inches
gay

Luckily my dream car has no shifter, I'll take one this user you're so generous
>inb4 muh feel

Given $5k is only about my monthly take home after tax, no.

>as the woman and her lawyer hangs onto the dildo

Are women always hanging on to dildos around you?

Take the five grand, hurl dildo into the nearest dumpster without ever installing. Dumb faggot didn't set the deal up as a contract nor even have witnesses to the verbal agreement, and even if he did I'm pretty sure such a shifter would qualify as an unlawful obstruction to safe/proper driving, making such a contract not legally binding anyway.

In this case I'd probably honor the bargain just for shits and giggles since my "dream car" is a hilariously overcompensatory fuckhueg dually pickup truck so the cockshifter and trailer-hitch trucknuts should practically be factory-standard anyway.

I don't think my bus driver will understand the joke...

C R Y P T O

Ask if I can get five grand to suck his dick once instead.

>dumb faggot didn't set the deal up as a contract nor even have witnesses to the verbal agreement

I'm sure that was all well fleshed out with the prompt being:

>A rich gay man offers to give you $5000 to fit this to your daily and you have to keep it on for the next 2 years.

Now, rich people typically aren't stupid, and often get into contracts, which they should have at least a functional understanding of.

Now, if you made an argument based on the fact that driving around with a dildo is very shaky in terms of "consideration" for the contractor, that could nullify the contract.

But it wouldn't be in your favor :(

But i'll give you credit for fully admitting ahead of time you tend to overcompensate so there's that.

>Porche 917/30 with the qualifying setup and a huge black dildo

Are they worth it should I get one?

Fuck yeah they are. You won't find a higher quality dildo or penetrable, plus you get to pick the color/pattern, firmness, size, cumtube, etc. They do have human style ones if the fantasy ones aren't your cup of tea.

I really have wanted to get a chance flared ever since I first looked though the site I think Ill get one.

Don't order too big for your first. I'd start with a chance unflared, the head of the flared is much more difficult to get in, especially if you're not in practice.

There is no way I would drive a manual. Fuck that nonsense.

Why are you here?

...

there cant be that many of you on this board

Speed isn't the reason I prefer manual

Combining traction control and modern stability control will allow a modern car to put out faster lap times but I never see any of you faggots being pro driver aids

Faggots

ok serious as fuck Veeky Forums how can i do this i want to buy a dragon dildo just do to do this
would one just make a hole and kinda stuff a nut or something in there to twist it on the stick or what?

Maybe there is

You would need something to match the threads of the gear shift and then have a hole in the bottom of it slightly smaller than the thing you threaded then jb weld the threaded piece to the inside of the bottom of the toy.

You must be new here. Welcome to Veeky Forums, faggot.

I guess if it's it's big enough you could find a knob that fits your car and glue it inside the bottom of the toy.

ok some thread kit for a shifter perfect but wouldnt jb weld or glue make the silicon deteriorate?
>also what dildo is that one specifically i want that curve to grab and shift baka
>also wouldnt the uv rays from the sun overtime kill the silicon considering i live in florida

I don't know because I never glued anything silicone before. They have silicone cement but that might also because you can't use silicone lube for silicone toys.
Kek I also live in Florida and it probably would overtime. You can find them on amazon if you don't want to use another site just make a fake email and get free prime but remember to cancel it before they charge you. Don't know which one that is.

ill just add another pretzal to my collection (smaller for the stick of course)

>buy cylinder style shift knob
>create hole the diameter of the shift knob
>fill hole with epoxy
>insert shift knob
>let cure
>never get laid again

Do I lose the money if the dildo falls apart? I don't think dildos were made to withstand frequent changes in temperature

bad dragon dildos are pretty strong actually
they even tell you to boil it in water if you really wanna clean it
not sure about oven like temps in your car for example like how i live in florida

5000 bucks? Sign me up. It'd be a laugh, I'd probably do it for a lot less because I don't take myself too seriously.

if i shift gears using my boipucci do i get payed double?

I would like to say I'm surprised to see so many "fans" of bad dragon dildos here... but I'd be lying right now.

Kys gtf

Bump

>tfw made 10k so far this month

Paint it black and carry on buying another daily for 1k, put the old one in a garage for 2 yrs then sell the 1k daily and use 4k profit to rice my main daily.
Profit. Nobody told I have to use the car.

>only $5k

That's not even €200/m. Won't even cover my fuel bills.

RCR is that you?

Nope. I also don't own a miata

I just ordered a chance unflared it better be worth it you fags.

Ask him if he would like $5000 to shove it up his ass and keep it there for 2 years.

Bump

stab him 22 times

I'm not poor enough where I need to finger fuck a didlo for the next two years.

I'd have to decline.

why would you buy a dildo that freakishly large

this is why gays scare me

>appear to be normal well adjusted gay man
>secretly shove fucking silicone horse cocks in my human sized rectum

w-why

there's sexual pleasure and there's fucking sicko

laugh at him. i gots a auto. i be telling him if your ass is so rich why havent you got a AU falcon?

>>BOOM! blew his mind

>Make a months pay
>Over the course of 2 years
How about nah

HEY Veeky Forums

bad-dragon.com/real-size

No chance, it makes me feel insubstantial.