How does a ragtag volunteer army in need of a shower somehow defeat a global superpower?

How does a ragtag volunteer army in need of a shower somehow defeat a global superpower?

>Get's practically ever historical fact wrong
>Still wins Tony's

How?

Technically all historical facts are probably false

How do we emerge victorious from the quagmire?That's not the next line, user.

Leave the battlefield waving betsy ross' flag higher

Did you know that Thomas Jefferson was a fedora-wearing white-supremacist with an IQ of 115?

What's interesting to me is all of the founding fathers have symptoms of aspergers or autism.

Here's a good example. For a time, Benjamin Franklin pretended to be a girl in his letters and correspondence to others anonymously.

>a global superpower

Will this meme end?
18th century Britain barely had any empire (in orange on pic related) and was at most a 2nd-rate European power
Both France and Spain (as well as Prussia, Austria and Russia) were more powerful
If anything, the odds were against Britain

Here's some of his letters as "Silence Dogood", which is as gay as a pseudonym you can get.

>"I reflected in my Mind on the extream Folly of those Parents, who, blind to their Childrens Dulness, and insensible of the Solidity of their Skulls, because they think their Purses can afford it, will needs send them to the Temple of Learning, where, for want of a suitable Genius, they learn little more than how to carry themselves handsomely, and enter a Room genteely, (which might as well be acquir’d at a Dancing-School,) and from whence they return, after Abundance of Trouble and Charge, as great Blockheads as ever, only more proud and self-conceited"

>"An honest Neighbour of mine, happening to be in Town some time since on a publick Day, inform’d me, that he saw four Gentlewomen with their Hoops half mounted in a Balcony, as they withdrew to the Wall, to the great Terror of the Militia, who (he thinks) might attribute their irregular Volleys to the formidable Appearance of the Ladies Petticoats."

>was at most a 2nd-rate European power

What is the Seven Years' War?
M8, the whole reason behind America declaring independence was that the Brits were using all of their monies to kick the rest of the world's ass.

>For a time, Benjamin Franklin pretended to be a girl in his letters and correspondence to others anonymously.
I feel for him, in college I used to dress up as a chick and pick up guys to bang me (they knew)

>What is the Seven Years' War?

A war in which Britain took an entire decade to defeat a vastly outnumbered French force in America while the real French army was busy with Prussia in Europe

Brits shill so hard with their propaganda about that war that people often forget that it's Prussia that was the big guy taking on all Europe while Brits were pulling off a tiny side-show overseas...

Other super power. The reason the British forces surrendered was because they were blockaded by the French navy.

Also, the British realized if they put all their forces in the 13 colonies, they might lose their Caribbean plantations.

That's right.. The British thought their black labor was more important than a bunch of uppity white dudes that didn't want to pay taxes.

The Brits had been a mainland superpower since Marlborough, and were simultaneously fighting on sea and in India.

Sugar is king.

To be fair, he was 16 when he made "Silence Dogood'

I'd argue Britain qualified as a superpower for most of the 19th Century. Their dominance of the globe was largely undisputed.

Tbf 16 was probably legal back then

Dude even made a fucking back story for her.

"At the time of my Birth, my Parents were on Ship-board in their Way from London to N. England. My Entrance into this troublesome World was attended with the Death of my Father, a Misfortune, which tho' I was not then capable of knowing, I shall never be able to forget; for as he, poor Man, stood upon the Deck rejoycing at my Birth, a merciless Wave entered the Ship, and in one Moment carry'd him beyond Reprieve. Thus was the first Day which I saw, the last that was seen by my Father; and thus was my disconsolate Mother at once made both a Parent and a Widow."

Franklin was fucking committed to being a trap

Yeah, I'd say they were a pretend superpower from the 1860s (moment their empire started to get big) until WW1 when it appeared that they needed the help of France, Russia and America to barely beat lone Germany

2 other superpowers helped them

Brits still got the better deal out of it. As much as the US were the big winners of WWI (not for fighting, but for position gained), the brits were the big winners of the SYW. Even if they suck ass and like to brag about taking a never-reinforced-Quebec in 4 years and 3 invasion armies. Shameless is the Brit, but who cares since he'll stay in the Union now :D

sort of related, but was there any dispute over the Louisiana Purchase after Napoopan was defeated? It was sold by Napoleon to the US, but did other powers not see this as legitimate since Napoleon was merely a pretender in their eyes and did not have the authority to sell French territory?