ITT: post historically inaccurate statements you've read on Veeky Forums (excluding blatant shitposting.)

ITT: post historically inaccurate statements you've read on Veeky Forums (excluding blatant shitposting.)

>Humanist thinking was introduced to Western Europe by the Arabs.
>Shield maidens were ever a real thing.

That's all I've seen lately off the top of my head.

Other urls found in this thread:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanish_Inquisition
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhineland_massacres
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_World_War_I#July_Crisis:_The_chain_of_events
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

ancient greek texts were imported to europe from kebabistan during the enlightenment cos the church banned/burned their copies since they were scared of competing pederasts stealing their thunder.
do you even history?

>Carter praise

>Christianity emerged before Judaism and Abraham, Moses and everyone before Jesus were actually Christians
>linear causality is to this day the most advanced model of reality and totally not useless in a world filled with complexity
>Christianity spontaneously emerged out of literal nothing and wasn't influenced at all by themes from Judaism, Zoroastrianism, Greek philosophy, and before that, the same thing applies to the Old Testament, which wasn't influenced at all by the polytheisms of Egypt, Ugarit, Mesopotamia and Canaan

Christian zealots truly are a hilarious bunch

>America is a melting pot

>Germany didnt cause WW1

>the Crusades were a defensive war fought by the Christians against Muslim aggression

>literally all of Africa is Mad Max tier
>Modern Japan doesn't have freedom of speech
>The Rape of Belgium didn't happen
>The Rape of Nanking didn't happen

All I can remember atm

>Jews didn't deserve the BLACKED anal bombardment they received by the Romans

Expressed by the same people who think the viking raids were unprovoked by the Catholic side.

>Christianity is just Marxism in a different form

>Muslims only managed to conquer the Persians & Byzantines because they were both exhausted thanks to a previous war

>The Soviets could have won without the allies

They didn't tho. Unless there's some documentation that Germany funded and ordered Princip that I'm unaware of.

Princip started a Balkans conflict
Germany made it a world war

...

>the american civil war was fought solely because of slavery
>socialism has never being tried
>the soviet union won ww2

Actually it was caused by Russia intervening.

See how mental gymnastics can make literally anything the cause?

>ancient greek texts were imported to europe from kebabistan during the enlightenment

what the fuck am I reading

What about it? After the chimpout known as Christianity, a lot of greek text found a home in the middle east before being imported back into Europe at a later date.

>Europeans reached Sardinia before the Renaissance

dont remember the exact post but there was this one retard who compared entire destruction of the aztec libraries by the spaniard to muslim libraries full of korans being burned by US solders

Aztecs had libraries?

A new information that is against your viewpoint, or ideology.

In a small sense, some of them were. But definitely not to the dindu nuffin extent I see many claim.

Does anyone have a screen cap of that poster who thought it was impossible to boat to Sicily until the Middle Ages?

Kek .

So apparently the Arabs conquered it using helicopters?

>>Muslims only managed to conquer the Persians & Byzantines because they were both exhausted thanks to a previous war
Argue this point

>Holy
>Roman
>Empire

That home would be Konstantinople and they would be brought back into the west when people fled from the chimpout known as the Ottomans.

sophistic untrue speculation from athiest spergs like>>who can't read latin

Are we talking 1v1 Germany Vs Soviets? If thats the case no they can't but if you mean no major Allies but everything else happens the same the USSR still wins. Its probably a more drawn out affair but it is the same by the time of D Day the USSR had basically pushing Germnay out of Russia and was ready for an overpowering offensive.

I once read here something about a golden age of the Arabs during the European Middle Ages.

Ikr, I see this one all the time

Too much to enumerate it all. People here generally seem to take ancient texts literally and disregard the basics of source criticism, which is exactly why you read stuff like shield maidens having been real, Caligula making his horse a consul, and so on.

there's a Muslim poster here that claims every Islamic empire only expanded as a response to aggression

also does a bunch of mental gymnastics about how Christians wanted to pay jizya and that it benefitted them

>nazi tank design was sekai ichi
>the catholic church and charlemagne were "truer" successors to the roman empire than the byzantines
>genetics and muh germanic/anglo/slav race as a motive for expansion/aggression/national mentality and foreign policy in medieval history

>also does a bunch of mental gymnastics about how Christians wanted to pay jizya and that it benefitted them

I mean, when the contemporary Christian version was "convert or get burned at the stake" paying an extra tax while being considered actual citizens seems pretty lenient.

>Our way lay through continuous farms and ordered settlements, whose inhabitants were all Muslims living comfortably with the Franks. God protect us from such temptation. They surrender half their crops to the Franks at harvest time, and pay as well a poll-tax of one dinar and five qirat for each person. Other than that, they are not interfered with, save for a light tax on the fruits of trees. Their houses and all their effects are left to their full possession. All the coastal cities occupied by the Franks are managed in this fashion, their rural districts, the villages and farms, belonging to the Muslims. But their hearts have been seduced, for they observe how unlike them in ease and comfort are their brethren in the Muslim regions under their (Muslim) governors. This is one of the misfortunes afflicting the Muslims. The Muslim community bewails the injustice of a landlord of its own faith, and applauds the conduct of its opponent and enemy, the Frankish landlord, and is accustomed to justice from him. He who laments this state must turn to God. There is comfort and consolation enough for us in the exalted Book: 'It is nothing but a trial; Thou makest to err with it whom Thou pleasest, and guidest whom Thou pleasest' [Koran VII, 155].

Where is the be burned at the stake part?

FYI, Muslim taxation of Muslims also amounted to half the harvest

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanish_Inquisition

Here.
It's a pretty obscure part of history though, not surprised you didn't know of it.

Russia halted its mobilization and offered to submit to arbitration in the Hague

Germany refused

Spain=/=Christianity as a whole

>The holocaust death tolls happened, but it was only because of allied strategic bombing!


Then again, that might be considered shitposting, I don't know how much the /pol/ crowd believes their own lines.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhineland_massacres

Come on now, don't even start this no true Catholic bullshit.

Are you suggesting Muslims did not massacre the shit out of the Jews every once in a while?

I'm suggesting that your "Catholic religious intolerance is a myth!" is bullshit.

Well I am not saying that.

I said Muslims weren't much more lenient than Christians.

>there is anything positive about Germany

The environment of Veeky Forums doesn't really encourage the kind of nuanced perspective on history you need to have to really understand the crusades.

>Eisenhower murdered one million innocent Germans in his death camps!

Literally anything from a commie apologist.

>Lenin's economic reforms were roaring success
>there was no technological and social progress in imperial Russia
>revolutionary Spain was a paradise on Earth and not a mismanaged 3rd world shithole
>famines happen every day in the Ukraine, the most fertile region in Europe

>Rome fell because of this one specific reason that just so happens to reinforce my political belief

This

Does anyone have the copypasta of the guy who thought it took years, even decades to travel from Sicily to Alexandria by boat?

>Russia halted its mobilization
Adding this to the blatantly false things we've seen posted on Veeky Forums

>muh dejuhnuhruhsee

Always a /pol/fag

>Muslims only managed to conquer the Persians & Byzantines because they were both exhausted thanks to a previous war
Explain

Underrated bait

>medieval peasants lived completely terrible lives for several hundred years.

Ah yes, the dark age meme

>The Holy Roman Empire was founded by "the pope"

Quite dank pham

...

this
>imaginary friends

>I said Muslims weren't much more lenient than Christians.
That's not actually true, though. Sure, they weren't San Francisco liberals holding hands in a race/sexuality rainbow circle, but you're gonna have to make some impressive leaps to compare the sheer number of Medieval and Early Modern religious pogroms against Jews, heretics, and non-[dominant religion] in Christendom versus the much smaller number in the Middle East.

It's not that Christians or Muslims were better people than the other, but that rough religious tolerance was more institutionalized and constant among Muslims at the time. A generation or two of Christian rule could be very tolerant, even better than any contemporary Muslim rule, sure, but almost invariably it all falls apart and there's a Papal bull, or a mob riot, or a pogrom.

>still posting that incomplete list that deliberately omits vital information
Take a look at the complete one and tell me it's Germany who's in the wrong here.

Clearly it's Russian meddling in the backyard of the Austro-Hungarian Empire which caused the conflict to spiral out of control - and France backed them in that.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_World_War_I#July_Crisis:_The_chain_of_events

>aztecs were bad warriors, they lost against only a couple hundred spaniards

I saw that too
No, he meant aztec texts that were burned by the spaniards, another guy commented about how all kind of destruction of ancient texts is sad and then a retard arrived saying that people wouldn't feel sad if it was american soldiers burning korans.

Strong man Kaiser Wilhelm turns it from a Balkan war into a world war.

>Pay jizya
>Pay Zakat

YOU JUST CAN'T WIN

oh no 300 Protestants were burned at the stake in England, oh no goyim it's annuda shoah

My current favorite is one I saw today claiming that Japan has no degeneracy and no tolerance the liberal boogeyman. This is the country that has several popular celebrity trannies and fags that are regularly on TV and not treated like monstrosities. Weabs are great.

>Implying that would've happened with germany not wasting resources elsewhere and the soviets getting free shit from Murica

Not this again
How retarded to you have to be.

an assault on Christendom by Muslim bandits that the Caliph wasn't doing anything about despite a deal with the Byzantine Emperor
Muslim spread probably influenced it as well

>That one dude who thinks that you couldn't sail to sardinia

Pretty much everything commies say.

People that are rabidly anti-great man theory

That one nigger that thinks the haitian genocide of white people was fully justified.

>the haitian genocide of white people was fully justified.

but it is

Go fucking home Reagan

I wish we had a full mad max continent...

>Literally everything that happened in the Holy Roman Empire is irrelevant because le >H>R>E Voltaire meme

Falling for obvious bait
Autism ladies and gentlemen

Great man theory is baloney my dude. No historian takes it seriously anymore.