ITT: we are in the Roman Empire

ITT: we are in the Roman Empire

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>There are only 4 roman roads, one of them literally run along Rhine and Danube
>Antonine Wall is called Hadrian's Wall for some reason
>Antonine/Hadrian's Wall exists at the time of Trajan
>Rome owns Crimea
>Rome owns all of the Black Sea's coast
>Peloponnese is a fucking island
>Azov sea is a fucking lake
What a shitty map.

Ignosce mihi adiutor est, tu mihi narras sapiunt Damascum versus?

haha good shout good shout. wasnt ther a roman road in britain? still have it going through london, just it has cars now

>wasnt ther a roman road in britain?
There were a roman road everywhere - pelagios.org/maps/greco-roman/

big fan of those oriental mosaics

BUILD WALL
U
I
L
D

W
A
L
L

dubs and hadrian removes barbarian for good

>ttp://pelagios.org/maps/greco-roman/
excellent

That map doesn't look right. At the death of Caesar, the kingdoms of Galatia, Bosphorus, Cappadocia, Armenia Parva all shared the same status of client kingdoms, yet they're shown as different on the map.
Also didn't Caesar rek and completely subdue the helvetii and asturians? How comes they're shown independent until the death of Augustus on the map? Nyon and Augusta Raurica were founded before Caesar's death and they'd fall in the light green part.
Also what's the criteria for showing the roads? You can't really consider the itinerary shown over Spain as the via Augusta, since it doesn't follow the coast, yet the inside road was nowhere near as important.

>he doesn't speak greek

>that map

Holy fuck. Roma invicta.

> The Carthage was the capital of the Vandal kingdom
> The Carthage was what caused the downfall of Rome in the end

Burning the city and destroying everything it stood for wasn't enough

>Living in the East Empoorer
Enjoy your Christians

HE WAS RIGHT

East was the wealthy side, aside from Italia proper. Plus all Patricians in Rome spoke Greek anyway.

Caligula did nothing wrong.

>Plus all Patricians in Rome spoke Greek anyway.
No more than all gentry in regency Britain spoke french.
Greek was a prestige language for the intellectuals, the average patrician would speak it no better than the average high schooler speaks the second language he was taught at school.

So I was on my way to Massalia for a vacation. I hear it's nice this time of year and the Celtic babes are smokin hot. I get to Album Ingaunum and decide to hunker down for a couple days to ride out a storm.

And guys... let me tell you that was a BIG mistake. All the fucking locals going on about "WE WUZ LIGURIANS N SHIET" all the fucking time. I couldn't even scribe my name and my sexual prowess on the communal bath walls there was so much graffiti. And I shouldn't have, but I did, say something about them being related to Celts. Oh no. Ohhhhhh noooooo.

Jupiter have mercy, these savages could barely put their Latin together to deny their relation to any Celts. When I suggested they were related to other Italics I couldn't think over the collective "REEEEEEEE" that erupted.

Once I left that sperg infested town, the road was full of more WE WUZ bullshit. It wasn't until I made it to Forum Iulii that the Ligurians disappeared. The Celts were cool, a little hairy for my taste but I still buggered one or two. Now when I reached Massalia, woahhhhhhhhhhhh Venus must have put a spell on me. Hottest babes and boys around. I didn't have enough denarius in the end so I settled on some more Celts. Damn strawheads started going on about WE WUZ GAUL though, so I ended up cutting my vacation short. Thought about traveling to Tarraco by ship next year but all I need is to hear about WE WUZ CESSETANI N SHIET the next time I travel.

I think I'll go to Syracuse next time around, but what do you think, fellow anons?

>going to Syracuse to avoid we wuzez
bad news for you frater

>I think I'll go to Syracuse next time around, but what do you think, fellow anons?
WEWUZ CORINTHIANS N SHIET

*riding in the middle of Mosseia*

Excuse me my kind fellow, do you mind telling me the direction to Damascus?

Was Dacia just autism?

>he doesn't speak geek
I'm glad

No, it had been a target since Caesar's time. They had a shitload of gold mines and they periodically attempted to unify the local and neighbouring tribes into an actual kingdom, so they were dangerous and had to be taken care of.

Oh boy...

Didn't even think of that. By the gods, can't these filth just get over it already

Sure! But your horse looks weary, let Hassan get you into one these pre-owned dromedary for almost no danarii down

fuck off to Veeky Forums

a few smelly pinko plebeians ACTUALLY tried to tell me that the brothers Gracchi were anything more than aspiring tyrants with their corn laws and agrarian reform l m a o

The corn laws are older than the Gracchi, and the agrarian reform could actually be better reconciled with the Mos Maiorum than the corrupted rent system.
There are valid criticisms against the Gracchi (sidestepping the senate, ignoring the traditional mandate limit for the tribunate), but yours are shit, frater.

>The corn laws are older than the Gracchi
so?
that doesn't invalidate what I've said nor my derision of such dangerous pleb musings

are you trying to make yourself a king user?

>so?
So what's the point of criticizing them for a piece of law so old you might as well call it part of the mos maiorum?
It most certainly wasn't dangerous pleb pandering, it was a perfectly rational attempt at regulating the flow of a staple resource. Food supply management is still a thing today you know.
>are you trying to make yourself a king user?
Is the senate? They have done the same thing for two centuries before the Gracchi were even born.
Hell even the agrarian reform wasn't a new thing. A first law for the management of the ager publicus was passed by the senate as early as the 4th century BC.

the Licinian one in 367 B.C. not allowing anyone to own over half an acre of public land?
Tiberius was just trying to revive that which earned him enmity, rather not give up my comfy domus secundus and vineyards that have been in my prestigious family since the early republic to some smelly freemen, if I'm quite honest with ye

>Is the senate?
AWFULLY Catiline-esque post there frater, watch yourself around the Caelian

post yfw waifu Faustina died

>rather not give up my comfy domus secundus and vineyards that have been in my prestigious family since the early republic
Nigger you're just renting them. Renting them way below market price because you bribed the censor too. Your ancestors look down on you in shame.

>watch yourself around the Caelian
Threats of violence, how typical. And you have the gall to call others prospective tyrants, the hypocrisy.

"What, do ye think I shall be cowed by the voices of men I myself brought in chains to Italy"

>Your ancestors look down on you in shame.
who cares what those fags think, I've used their death masks at various orgies and placed them on my courtesans
their spirits could be lares to a brothel for all I care kek, all I really want to do is fuck boys and be consul for a bit

>the hypocrisy.
outing yourself as a plebeian on an overwhelmingly patrician oriental mosaic forum, back to

>iam pridem Syrus in Tiberim defluxit Orontes
>et linguam et mores et cum tibicine chordas
>obliquas nec non gentilia tympana secum
>vexit et ad circum iussas prostare puellas.
>ite, quibus grata est picta lupa barbara mitra.

>horum ego non fugiam conchylia? me prior ille
>signabit fultusque toro meliore recumbet,
>advectus Romam quo pruna et cottana vento?
>usque adeo nihil est quod nostra infantia caelum
>hausit Aventini baca nutrita Sabina?

>disrespects the ancestors
>disrespects the mos maiorum
>insults others as fags while boasting of wanting to fuck boys
>still has the gall of calling himself patrician
Have you no shame? I bet your "pater" was leading armies in the provinces when your mater conceived you.

fucking boys isn't gay

VHATTHEFVCKDIDIIOVSAIIABOVTMEIIOVLITTLEBITCH...

Oh right, of course. You only "give", you never "take", do you user?
I believe you.
I believe you give your mouth and you never take arses I mean, you disgusting irrumator.

s-source?

exhentai.org/g/666306/7f0041faf1/

no worries frater

not even going to waste anymore precious boy fucking time on you, lowborn scum

>not even going to waste anymore precious boy fucking time on you, lowborn scum
Yes user, run away. Run like the senate after knowing Divus Julius was marching on the Urbs.

Galba for Emperor fight the filthy pretenders!

Galba will make Rome great again!

Otho will lead us to victory, Galba needs to fucking die!

this is some dorf fort tier shit

I would have the chance to become a general. That'd be interesting.

the fuck is this shit

Why can't these filthy chr*stians shut up? Bunch of radicals unironically worshipping a hebrew pleb.

They're just a pack of jews doing fucking orgies behind closed doors. Same as the Dionysians, back in the old republic days. They're not 'conspiring to being down the state' or whatever, no one cares about them.

Anyway - anyone else here in Gaul think we should split off and do our own shit? Maybe take Britannia with us? I'm so fucking tired of the whole 'Let's go fight a fucking expensive war with the parthians for no reason' meme.

why couldn't rome just move troops from the sea to asia?

Quid est mihi niggus

Saturnalia can't come soon enough.

VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1820: Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they every have before!

...

>it's a Persians getting pissed about Dura again mural

Can we just give it to them? Holy fuck.

Bar bar bar bar bar bar, bar bar bar.
B A R B A R
A
R
B
A
R

Bar bar Romans bar bar?

Gib citizen Bar

>g-garum?
ftfy

This.

HOL UP
>*bites shield*
SO YOU BE SAYIN
>*paints face*
WEZ
>*puts on trousers*
LEGIONARES N SHEEIT?

...

Quid fecit tibi stupri irrumabo dicunt animae meae parum canis? Iam faxo scias lectus caput meum genus in classe signaculis et iam plura arcana involvit Al Quaeda populationes et confirmavit super CCC necat. Crocodilus militiae exercitatum et ego sum in toto vertice US militum pellentesque. Tu mihi nihil aliud signum. Delebo te irrumabo cum praecisione similia quæ numquam visa sunt super terram, verbis meis attende in stupri. Putas me posse in stercore quod egredietur de Internet? Cogita iterum irrumator. Sicut contingentes arcanum meum locutus sum: exploratores estis trans USA et IP network of ordo est, ita nunc te, melius parandam hiems, vermibus. Deleo misellus exiguus vocas tempestate tua. Vestibulum stupri mortuum malit haedo. Possum quoquam quisquam, et interficiat vos septingenti super vias, et ultricies nuda manu. Non sum admodum exercitatum inermes pugna, et Civitatibus Foederatis Americae accessum ad totum Marine arma sua amplitudine, et illam miseram extergere asinum facie continenti parum stercore. Utinam potuisset scire nefas retributionem vestram "callidus" comment erat detraham te forsitan lingua habuissent vestri stupri. Tu non fecisti, nunc tibi solvit pretium, malique ineptus es. Ego cacas in ira super vos et ero vobis in obruent illam. Tu fucking mortuis, Kiddo.