What are some decent alternative businesses/investments?

I'm almost 28, and have been unemployed for almost two years now. I have about 530k saved up with about 93% in Stock/ETFs.

I still live with my father, but I want to move out, and maybe one or two states away (some where with a higher capitalization rate than the bay area).

I have a 1 year old DUI, and no useful skills (2 year AA, 4 year drop out), I have interviewed a quite a few places, but the fight to become a government (pensioned + 4 day work week) worker has left me.

I don't want to be computer tech, IT guy, accountant/bookkeeper, salesperson, medical tech, nurse, teacher, engineer, plumber, or electrician.

The only way I can think of making money is owning stocks, renting out real estate, or buying a vacuum truck and pumping people's septic tanks, or getting a job at McDonalds/7-11 and buying a franchise.

What are some alternative ways to make decent money that can often beat the SP500, or some job/business/skill that sounds fun or lucrative?

Basically I need a time sink that can earn me some money, and something to tell my family/friends that I am doing, so they don't think I am just playing computer games and getting high 100% of the time.

It does not have to be glamorous like McDonald's or septic tank pumping, but it has to be something I can do with minimal skills, but it has to be something potentially lucrative.

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Listen. I aim to be as wealthy as you. I'm not guna go back to wagecucking when I'm there so don't make an ass of me and do that. Take your money and do something BIG. Otherwise invest a lil to me because I'll do something big with it:

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>instead of giving you advice give me free money to invest in shitcoin for myself

>I'll Never Make It: The Post
>aka I'm a fucking loser give me free shit

>tfw there are 20 year olds out there with 500K+ and they don't even know how to turn it into millions
>he's actually still living in his fucking parents' basement

JUST

Don't fuck with your base. Maybe take 10% out to invest in shitcoin, or don't, but don't start withdrawing on the investments that I'm assuming keep you and your father from using food stamps.

Look, it's a tough world. You think people want to serve you shit at starbucks? You think people like walking dogs for $10/hour? They are the same as you. You have to take life by the throat and rape it in the mouth.

Look around you. What do people need? Provide some use to the world and you will make money.

Or dump all your money into Ripple and quadruple your net worth by next week.

>Or dump all your money into Ripple and quadruple your net worth by next week.

solid

Well my father just hit eight digits on friday, but yeah, I am only planning on taking 30% and investing it in sewage or slums.

People will always need sewage and slums.

Honestly I can't think of any better low cap businesses other than sewers or slums.

Wait, what the hell are you talking about. Your father is worth over $10,000,000?

Are you fucking for real? Am I reading this correctly?

Do whatever the fuck you want, seriously. I don't mean coke and hookers, I mean look within yourself and find out what you want to give in the world. DO NOT WORK AT MCDONALDS. Do not invest in sewage and slums. Invest in things you believe in, not dumb shit like roads sewers and powerlines.

But slums and sewage sound like a safe, good investment that can benefit me, and anyone who ever becomes my customer.

I don't believe in anything.

My favorite things in life are marijuana, bikini bars, and computer games, which are all things that are not known to be good investments, or problematic investments to say the least.

Get some real interests

You sound like a spoiled trust fund babby

Honestly I would look into some jobs that require you being outside and around nature, you have enough money where financial requirements isn't a problem so you are essentially stress free when it comes down to how much money you need to obtain, so why not use your time being outside in fresh air getting sunlight and moving your body? Even simple jobs like mowing a cemetery in one of those motorized lawnmiwer cars can be a simple job where you are a lone in nature.

There are also other jobs that are similar to this is Forestry, look around on indeed.com or craigslist. I also highly suggest you move out, living with your parents when you are older is not healthy mentally, you are suppose to be on your own looking for mates and how the heck can you bring mates back to your place with your parents living there?

If I helped you at all or gave you any inspiration, throw me some papah at my paypal [email protected].

A cemetery would be lots of fun.

Don't listen to the people bitching at you, the most insufferable trust fund kiddies are the ones that set out to try to help the world and just fuck up everything worse. Just enjoy life and invest in sewage and slums because as you said that's a safe investment.

I am not disagreeing with you, but I have been a good steward of it.

Landlord/small business owner here.

You have no skills. Develop some or live off a 4% withdrawal rate, roughly $20k a year.


Do not make ANY speculative investments. NONE, ZERO. (Get rich quick schemes, crypto coins, your friends restaurant idea, etc.)

Consider landlording. Much easier than a local business, and less riskier if done right.

Personally I would use a margin loan(I.e. leveraged) as a down payment on a rental or small business with the remainder financed. But that requires a lot of discipline, creditworthiness, etc.

No money out of pocket and instant cash flow.

Just so you know OP
instagram.com/traversbeynonofficial/?hl=en

I got linked to this when I searched your image.

He's staying in a hotel that isn't ridiculously expensive (versace).
The helicopters are from Crown Casino. The room that he has photos of isn't even that good (you can see the building I live in opposite). I've stayed in the same room in Crown Casino when I've visited (Crown Towers btw).
One of the Rolls Royces, is again, Crown Casinos.

I'm in Australia and I've never heard of his business. He has some money but isn't wildly successful.

The problem is that he won't enjoy his life. Money really does not buy you happiness. A lot of extremely wealthy people say that if you make over 70k a year, more money doesn't make you happier. It's true (though I think it's closer to 140k a year).

If you don't push yourself, no matter your economic status, you will fall into a depression. Why? Because you unconsciously know that you are wasting your life, and that given immense resources you decided to do nothing. Call it what you want, but only poor people dream about being a piece of shit rich kid, those who actually are will suffer unless they set positive goals and pursue them.

so your're saying get into septic/slums

Why not study some shit you enjoy? Something easy like philosophy or history.

You are in the perfect position to be a real estate guy.

Get your real estate license online, it's like $300.

Then buy 2 homes. Both right around $200k, both close to eachother, both in a city with a good economy like Dallas, Atlanta, Charlotte, etc...

Live in one and rent out 1 or 2 bedrooms. Entirely rent out the other.

You should make enough to pay the mortgage and live. And on the side you can keep trading and trying to make money that way.

> Don't fuck with your base

I disagree. Index funds and property are both safe investments for your base. Even in a crash they come back if you just ride it out.

Besides, with homes, a crash can even be a good thing, you will still have renters out there.

Also retirement homes and daycare facilities are both good investments as well.

>Besides, with homes, a crash can even be a good thing, you will still have renters out there.
speaking from experience (owned apartments during the big crash), it's not. people move in with family members, move to lower rent cities, or stay in super cheap slums. you'll get low rents and more time vacant.

But it would get me in the real estate business, accruing experience, and potentially make some money.
.I was thinking about a 500,000 water front triplex, or a few 150,000 single family homes to start.

Well you are correct, the 2008 crash was herrendous, and the lead up was way way overinflated properties.

But traditonally, and even now, I would say RE is a fine investment.

I just don't think someone should sit on their base and never try anything with it.

Just be a cautious and well researched investor.

I hope you drown in shit. Not yours, other people shit. You deserve that.

Bro, put at least some of that money into bitcoin and lend on poloniex for a passive income, you are litterally missing like $1000 a day with that money!