Spessmen on a spess station /ss13g/

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Last time on /ss13g/ - spessmen on a spess station:
>Great greentext stories
>Pomf promised to remove all the shitters
>Nah just kidding it was all shitposting
>why is the OP pastebin so fucking bloated with shit

>What is Space Station 13?
youtube.com/watch?v=FHH1vfY6HTA
pastebin.com/VNcX2Quc

>New player guide
ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/The_Basics
ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/General_Help

>BYOND client
byond.com/download/build/LATEST/

>Pomf Serbian, main Veeky Forumsstation server
byond://game.ss13.moe:7777

>Test server
byond://ss13.moe:1337

>Public server list
byond.com/games/exadv1/spacestation13

>How do I connect to the servers?
Hit the cogwheel in the upper right corner of the BYOND hub and pick "Open Location"

>Veeky Forumsstation forum and logs + Discord circlejerk
ss13.moe/forum/
game.ss13.moe/logs
discord.gg/c32NDYj

>Map renders collection: updated sometimes
game.ss13.moe/minimaps/images/maps/

>Coderbus, here!
github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13
@rizon #coderbus @rizon #vgstation
discord.gg/nfmjc56

>Round Stats
stats.ss13.moe/

>SS13 booru for all your SS13 images!
ss13.booru.org/

>How To Install BYOND: The Video Tutorial: The Movie
youtube.com/watch?v=-iWiZwv9f1o

>Nostalgia
boards.fireden.net/vg/search/text/ss13g/
ss13.moe/index.php/bans

>OP Pastebin
pastebin.com/raw/z7czw5WQ

Other urls found in this thread:

github.com/vgstation-coders/vgstation13/pull/17473
github.com/vgstation-coders/vgstation13/issues/16357
ss13.moe/forum/viewtopic.php?f=43&t=3408
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

"My admin Probe came to Veeky Forums a friend. He had Lord Pomf's flags and colours, and posted his images on the thread to meme with friends. And they shitposted him. Shitposted, I say, and may Goldsteel choke upon his fables. I admin with MaiPai, forumpost with Xevonix, promise Sawbones a steam friend request ... but never think that means I have forgotten. The thread remembers, Headmin Foster. The thread remembers, and the mummer's farce is almost done. My admin is back."

It's Friday, I better see everyone single one of you faggots on the server tonight.

Too busy playing better games without complete animals and faggots

Whatchu playin lately user?

I have never watched GoT and can't make sense of that but that is my name. Post a mapping complaint.

I like to play bay sometimes

At least you can find enough time to shit up the thread while not playing the game.

Nu-Bay Colonial Memes-tier shit, or Old Bay where it was still a station?

Oh, I'm still playing it. You fags brought this upon yourselves

The former is all I get, unfortunately

Tfw no corporate bay on an uncucked SEV torch

baby's day out mode when

>player controlled baby spawns at roundstart
>captain has to secure him
>anywhere from 2-5 undercover syndicate agents cooperate to capture him
>baby can resist out of people's grasp/containers and ventcrawl on cooldown timers
>babu gets randomized objectives as the round goes on (e.g. "go to the laundry room," "pet ian," "light somebody's cock on fire"), completing them enhances baby's abilities and strengthens its plot armor for further mischief
>baby must eat regularly or die (to prevent players from locking it in a room for extended periods)
>four minutes before the emergency shuttle docks all agents are notified via pda uplink that a syndicate shuttle will be arriving at one of several random locations at the same time as the emergency shuttle
>if the baby arrives at centcomm, the crew wins
>if the baby arrives aboard the syndie shuttle, the syndicate wins
>if the baby's left on the station or dies, everyone loses (round continues??)

Me in the middle

Why is everyone a muhrine now?

You know, april's fools is near

Worth noting that to my knowledge, admins don't have guidelines for how to deal with Rev/Cult rounds.

The way I see it, if crewmembers are resisting search/implant after a revolution has been confirmed, security shouldn't get bwoinked for killing them.

...

You walk by the bar to find a girl dressed in white and black, who's face is covered by a monochrome mask in the same color scheme as her clothes. The mime's brown is topped with a noticeable red beret. She notices you as your eyes explore her heavenly body, with extra attention to her chest. She isn't as big as say, the nurse or the cute scientist you talked to the other day, but she can at least be around the perky B-cup range with her nipples poking through her shirt ever so slightly. You look at her ID, it seems her name is Ellie. She motions you to go into the dark halls of the maintenance shafts with her, and you oblige. After all, who wouldn't want some sweet mime pussy? As you turn on the flashlight, you can see her little ass filling her tights as she moves through the metallic halls. You follow her down into a storage room, laying her on the table. As she gazes into your eye, you can feel your muscles loosen, and you go into a trance. She nips your neck, giggling as she starts to suck you dry. You start feeling weak as she bites harder, until you black out.

Looks like someone should've turned on their suit sensors.

I want to cum inside that mime

...

>Vampire starts attacking crew with a katana right in front of me.
>RD had left a laser gun in my room, so I grabbed it and shot him up to try and save a janitor, scientist and I bashed him to death and decapitated him
>Feel regret as I know it immediately became Vampstended.

>one round
>all ready self shilling

Reminded me
>last night
>simple mobs flooding the hallways
>smack down tape
>see a greyshirt getting violated by a mob behind the tape
>volley the caps laser into the greyshirt because he’s trying to yakkity away
>volley the caps laser into him again
spacecombat.jpg

hot

the threads going by so fast no one will know that i'm gay

It's common knowledge by now

>2562
>walk into bar
>battle of lil slugger starts playing

>want to play ss13
>dont want to play ss13

Hey Probey

Heads up on balance PR.

(Bagel) Rebalances starting power to last 15-20 minutes instead of 90 minutes by reducing starting charge on SMES from 1,000,000 to 200,000.


github.com/vgstation-coders/vgstation13/pull/17473
Resolves github.com/vgstation-coders/vgstation13/issues/16357

I should remake image that since annoying dylanstrategie with anime is no longer vogue.

Hello anonymoose.

Imagine everyone is 100% competent at their job.
How many people would each department need to unlock its full potential (Medbay curing people asap and having all powers, Science having every mineral and shitting out mechs, etc.) ?

That would be boring.

0

>Heads
What even is authority when nobody listens to you
>Sec
Depends heavily on how many antags you are and whether they're also competent
>Engineering
1 MoMMI
>Cargo
One for manning the desk and handling orders through telepads, one for walling off cargo and declaring independence
>Medbay
>2 min, 4 preferably
>Science
Fucking 1 at the most

ss13.moe/forum/viewtopic.php?f=43&t=3408

The player feedback forums are gold.

You forgot one in cargo to do research

>CM

>heads
lmao
>sec
1 warden, 3 security officers and one of the officers with the scanner
>enginnering
2 pipe wizards and a mommi that ahelped to help in the autism project
>cargo
1 qm to handle the crates, 2 cargo techs doing a gimmick and 2 miners, one that knows how to cheese vault and another one with dwarven blood
>medbay
3 autists and a geneticist
>science
one scientist that camps telescience 24/7 and overseers the entire station while inside of a small cubicle with the cameras, cmc, telepad console and a chem dispenser.

Depends on if you just want to run a station (aka just set up power, maybe grow/order some food), or actually cope with shit. Engineering can be done just by setting power, but if dude bombs go off, you're gonna want more people. Same with medbay etc

We don't talk about that here.

Thanks Borgo
Really hope Vincent made it out

i passed out mid round, what happened?

I feel like you're missing the point of the game.

The fun comes from people being incompetent.

Who did the flood? The nonantag plasmaman or marko 'greentext' bomb?

Not that dude, but competant people should be restricted to Heads only and clown.

Usual distro memes resulting in shuttle call.
Though that RD and Atmos Tech I genuinely believed were antags considering how they acted.

>call for engi to unfuck syndie'd jukebox
>says no because radiation
>keep coming back to the bar and hearing batmanXironman adult fanfic
>lose my shit after it's still going on for what feels like half an hour
>get a toolkit and start fucking with the jukebox myself
>get irradiated to the point where CMO needs to do full body surgery on me

I wish that Engi was a bit more cautionary with his tales

reminds me of when I once got Machine Overloaded as HoS by a Milf AI and when I yelled loud that the AI was malfunctioning the HoP didn't believe me because he didn't trust HoSes as a categorical rule

moral of the story is that heads should be people you can trust to be competant

Can't unfuck emagged jukeboxes, just hacked ones.
Also, just get a wirecutter, radiation only comes from pulsing a certain wire

I was that engi, I didn't want to irradiate everyone in the bar, but yeah, it's serious shit if you get the wrong wire... at least medbay got something to do though

Marko

Alright you got 10 hours out of me, thats all you get today

the syndie'd jukebox is better than the normal one, protip: pulse the shuffle and the power wire to change songs.

>tfw jukebox hacking is a secret only mastered by a couple people

Nothing in the logs about bob fucking with pipes, so the borg killed an innocent man for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

>Basic SS13 Round

Get a radsuit if you want to do that. Engineering shouldn't mind lending it to you if you just explain what it's for.

For how easy it is to fuck the distro line, it's very hard to un-fuck it.

Marko "Guaranteed Antag" Bomb

>NEVER TRUST SHITCURITY
I'd say this is a good rule for the layman, but Heads should at least be competent enough to evaluate how each other member of the Command staff should be treated. As long as they communicate every once in a while, they're good in my book.

BEWARE

Batman and Robocop.
It's half an hour long, you can find the script on google

I kinda wish that there was a tiered unlock system for rolls. Every "basic" departmental job starts unlocked but to unlock auxiliary rolls (like xenoarch/bio/warden/detective) you'd have to play a minimum of 5 to 10 rounds as a basic officer/doctor/scientist position. Only unlock heads when you've done 5 rounds or so with all rolls related to the department. Captain is unlocked by doing 5 or so rounds as all heads.

Sounds like bayshit, but it'd be nice knowing a head at least played those departments a respectable amount and might just know what he's doing instead of Joe schmo that just started playing and went HoS for free armory access to do his nazi gimmick.

What server is best if I want to rp a shota boyslut?

He had been law 2'd by Horatio, actually.

Horatio spent all round trying to get the AI/Borg to either arrest or fuck the plasmaman.

Did you made it out alive ? A borgo dragged me so I could go to the pods without passing out from the cold
t. Alois

That's the one, I was trying my hardest not to actually listen to it. It was.. indeed Robocop instead..

Poor Bob

Nah.
The fasted way to git gud is to sink or swim. Getting lynched for being a shitler a few times usually convinces people.

Friendly reminder of what SS13 has become

Not here
Vore, maybe

>Fallout
Also Ivy is a boy's name so that's gay

my steam friends list

i've only ever met girls named Ivy

So is Ashley you fag

now now, no need to hate on Fallout13. I have had some good roleplay on the NON-ERP server.

Veeky Forums

look at ailsa

>Vore, maybe

Checked it, all characters must be 18 years old or above.

I'm gonna play at least one round user, just for you

>tfw no qtpie silicon to keep you company

Ban evading or pardon from the host?

Ban evading obviously. They'll never catch me!

>2hotdogs permaban reason: banevading (pomf123)

>Tfw no erp serber that has no furries or the expectation to fill somone/you're own stomach with living people.

>tfw tried vore once and saw people freaking out about someone erping but a-okay with killing mouse people with their stomach acids.

what is pomfs static? Or does he random name?

His static on pomf123 was Alejandro something last I saw, but no doubt different if he plays on an alt

alejandro hirleman

If you vote for Box your dick becomes a noodle

>no other docs, just me to run all of medbay, and I start late
>there's 1 mommi who's making an operating room right in the middle of medbay
>make the mixes, stock the fridge
>stock the other fridge the mommi made
>make biomass for the cloner, and order more blood
>start getting tools from science
>still not a single patient
>sorting out first aid kits when the powersink blows, breaking my foot and making me deaf
>I'm virtually the only casualty, most medbay machines are gone, unpowered or broken
>get a suit from eva eventually, then make it to escape

That round just skipped the wild ride completely, went straight from prep to shtf and evac. I gave out 1 pill all shift

So, if Tator AI is malf without any of the difficulty, why don't they just merge the two?

I think I have nothing to worry about

there are no stupid que-

>When you want to meme but someone rolls bombs

DATUMS NEVER

>tfw loved being male squire on Lifeweb and just being an idealistic boy and following my mentor all bright-eyed and cheerful
>tfw can't do that on anything else

What of I don't have a sick to start with.

>not playing with a raging boner

Friendly reminder that marko bomb is objectively bad player.

>tfw

...