So besides the fact I've been rejected from over 75 jobs I've applied to so far since I graduated last September 2016...

So besides the fact I've been rejected from over 75 jobs I've applied to so far since I graduated last September 2016, and my parents telling me that I was a "mistake" for being born and that they wouldn't care even if I "killed myself", what are some ways I can turn the last £1000 of my savings to £10,000 in a last ditch YOLO attempt to make something of my pathetic existence before the end of this year?

Please don't suggest any crypto currencies - I'm already invested in small amounts of BTC, Ether and Ripple, but sadly, not enough to be a millionaire yet.

I'm thinking of perhaps putting some of my savings into Corbyn winning the June 8th General elections in the UK - the odds are currently 10 to 1, so I will x10 my money in one go if I'm right. Is this a bad idea?

If that doesn't work out, perhaps put it all on Gold. If the EU goes tits up and Merkel doesn't get reelected, atleast gold should go to the moon. R-Right?

Anyways, I'm open to suggestions. Basically looking for a guaranteed way of making a 1000% return or x10 my money before the end of this year.

>inb4 sucking dick

>Basically looking for a guaranteed way of making a 1000% return or x10 my money before the end of this year.

I forgot to add before I kill myself before the end of the year.

Dryships

invest in xby

Isn't this a dead stock though? It was worth 40 million a share 10 years ago and the price just keeps dropping....

Maybe you should travel

Go to the casino and put it all on 0, the number of how many people you have slept with

Get a job you fucking idiot. 75 jobs? When I was unemployed I'd go to a local coffee house dressed for an interview and apply for 75 jobs A DAY. You don't WANT a job. In one week I applied to 378 jobs, tracked them all in a spreadsheet, called and followed up on all the ones I didn't get a rejection letter from every 3 days. I'd hit up every job fair in town. It's been two years and I'm STILL hearing back from a few jobs a week.

>and my parents telling me that I was a "mistake" for being born and that they wouldn't care even if I "killed myself"

How did they both say that? Which parent said it first? And the other parent agreed? Be exact here. Thanks.

Your parents sound like cunts m8. Age and qualifications?

Bro wtf are you talking about. If you have money in Ethereum then you know you'd have recently gotten 10x returns. If you'd put the 1000 pounds in a few months ago you'd have 10,000 now, effectively, with zero margin, just holding.

Stick it into fucking crypto and you should at least get a few x returns in the next month or two, notwithstanding a crash, which would be less likely than you getting a bet right.

suck dick then put your dick sucking money into DGB.

Eth and BTC are peaking though

your fetish is very specific

They just summoned me to the living room one day and stated their extreme disapproval for my failures and how they get embarrassed when discussing me with their friends. They started lecturing me how everyone's sons and daughters they know already have well established jobs by now, some already on the property ladder, some even having started families, and I'm just "sitting in my room all day doing nothing". It was basically my dad who told me that I should just "jump in front of a train and kill myself" if I don't get a job by the end of this year, and my mom nodded her head in agreement. I'd like to believe this is their way of tough love, but it sounded pretty sincere.

My dad is a consultant GP and my mom is a HR manager.

I bought 10 ether when it was below $20, so even though I made huge gains, its not enough to live on. Also this

sounds like you must master the art of bullshitting people, as well as walking into human resources with a suit on. good luck.

How old are you?

>buy some cheap plastic bullshit that's currently trendy from alibaba
>resell at 10x markup at summer parades, festivals, etc
It's surprisingly easy to make money this way. Walk around selling fidget spinners to little brats and theie parents in a crowded area.

Highly unlikely imo.

Your silly parents don't want you to kill yourself, don't worry, they just want to be assured that you're happy and have direction.

I'm going to bad hold for the long term, but with £1000, I can buy 13 ether at current prices. Assuming ether rises to £775 ($1000), I can make a 976% return at best, so thats what, roughly £10k profit. But ether reaching $1000 will take a few years and I only got this year before I'm offing myself.

Op, conservatives will landslide next election. No way in hell will that Commie win. It's a shitty return but put your money on conservative majority. Mrs May is polling the same as thatcher in popularity. She can't lose. She's the only one offering to fight the EU over our Brexit agreements. The country is rallying behind her. I know life long labour supporters who are backing conservatives for the first time because of her. All my family are voting for her as well. Even the ones that never vote. Labour lost Edinburgh council for the first time ever in county elections. Trust me, May will landslide. She is evening bringing back the controversial fox hunting plan and she's still going to landslide.

That sucks. There are a lot of people with one such parent. But when both are that horrible you "won the lottery". I bet you could at least start a constructive life when you put some distance between yourself and them.

Dude, you need to get a job and move out. Do construction or landscaping or something and just pile up hours; your parents will be thankful because you'll be out of the house all day and you will be making money. Don't use day trading as a last ditch, use it as expendable side income or retirement planning.

You can't avoid responsibility. Many have tried, only the extremely lucky ones get away with it. If your philosophy is "if I don't get extremely lucky with an easy way out of this hole, I will kill myself" you really aren't giving yourself a whole lot of wiggle room or chance to grow.

Here's a way to make a shit ton of money. Tell your story on youtube about how your parents told you this. Hide cameras all over your house and fake your suicide. Come up with some clever way to make them think you're dead for a long ass time. Then one day SURPRISE MOTHA FUCKA I'M ALIVE. All this drama will guarantee you go viral, making you millions of dollars. Drag it out for a while.

follow this guy, and start the hustle.

Yeah you're probably right but the return on Theresa May winning is 1.06 to 1 currently on Betfair which is only a 5.6% return...

I'm trying to get a job but its just not working out. I always get cucked either during the phone interviews or on-site group exercises. Its a numbers game I know and I need to keep applying, but honestly the whole process is just soul and mentally destroying. Yeah I am weak and a loser. Tell me something I don't know...

Don't bet on Corbyn. Even if somehow he gets a chance to win he'll ride his cuck bus to defeat.

Your parents are heartless scumbags OP. Do this and expose them to the world. Fuck with their heads and profit off them.

If you bet the family savings on penny stocks and lost everything, I could understand where your parents' remarks are coming from. But just being a jobless bum? That's just plain stupid. If you were as heartless as your parents, you'd be tying them up and torturing them for being such idiotic loudmouths.

>Please don't suggest any crypto currencies

But OP that's the best chance that you have. You should use your savings and trade using insane amounts of leverage on FOREX, using websites that allow you to use crypto instead of making you pay with fiat

G-guys I just realized that the job market is going to be worse because of increasing population. Are we heading towards the doom of our civilization?

Maybe this.My mom routinely says she should have aborted me bit she absolutely adores me tho.

rofl

cut all ties with them, do your own thing, they sound like scumbags

OP, I graduated in summer 2015 and only started my first white collar job a few weeks ago.

Enjoy your free time while it lasts by using it productively.

Define "free time". I wagecuck but I still get time to play vidya, learn new shit from YouTube university and trade crypto.

Buy DigiBytes fool

not too late senpai

>trying this hard
>to wagecuck

FedEx is hiring truck drivers with no trucking license they called me back the same day $20/hr. It's bullshit but that's life until something better comes

Don't listen to the coin shills the bubble is bursting.

such a sad cunt, I feel for you having to deal with shit parents and probably shit life choices that led up to this point
get a sandnigger job if you can't into higher mental faculties
10x or 100x gains are wishful thinking without a substantial amount to invest and a well thought-out plan to do so
don't gamble with what little you have left

Dude, chances are you're not going to make a 1000% return in the next year. Don't gamble in your position, just keep on working at potential employment. Anywhere really, get enough to establish yourself away from those shitbag parents of yours. Find someone offering cheap rent with a roommate. If those scum sucking parents of yours feel you should kill yourself take every chance you can to wipe their existence from your life once you have even the slightest bit of freedom. Toxic creatures worried about what others think of their children need to be sent to auschwitz with the kikes they idolize.
Fuck me I hate shitty parents.

Your parents are scum you need to emotionally sever your feelings to them before you can work on improving yourself.

If you need motivation just think that one day you'll be able to dance on their graves. Then get on JSA

Which part of the country is FedEx hiring drivers with no exp?