>dad died
>better get angry at the sea
Badly describe a historical figure
>believing in shit tier propaganda
Jesus this board has no hope. It needs stickies, a wiki, fucking anything and it won't get it.
Telemachus
Xerxes I
>remember that time I solo'd an entire army with my bed lion?
>Don't like monastery on hill
>Burn the hill
>Mustachio with a fez
>Reformated our alphabet
>Collected some myths and legends
>Died in Wienna and buried in Belgrade
Guy learns one weird trick on how to be emperor
>father that wasn't his father gets killed
>BTFOs everyone
Vuk Karadzic?
>gets cucked
>cucks the world
Augustus.
>WE WUZ GREEKS AND SHIIET
>dies
napoleon
>stole all "his" ideas
>genius
Genghis Khan
>dad dies
>losing what should have been the easiest battle of history
>raised by templars
>remove nobles
>remove kebab
Newton
>nigger
>elected president
>bribes bodyguards to kill his predecessors
>killed by his bodyguards
obongo
>Since my mom won't have sex with me, I'll start a world war
willy
Nnamdi Azikiwe?
Correct.
----------------
King's grandfather gets cuck'd
King's father gets cuck'd
King BTFO everyone
King's son gets cuck'd
> be "retarded"
> everyone hates him
> surprise! You're emperor now.
Goodluck Jonathan?
Brazzers before the 20th century.
Napoleon
Are you talking about Theseus?
MUH
BENEVOLANCE
MUH
HAN
I don't agree with you at all, but Kek.
Wilhem
Yep
Millions died because an autist couldnt shag his mom
Bill Clinton!
>didn't want a job
>now considered the best person to ever have it
Donald Trump
Claudius
>robbed banks
>well, im head of state
Donald Trump.
correct
no
>>now considered the best person to ever have it
>let's launch an invasion of france
>dies
Coolridge
Alfred the Great (learned that in Vikings)
Hitler
>Become a teenager king
>Go to non sense war
>Dissapear
>le ebin Hitler was a historical figure meme
> demagogue elected to rule the country
> supports ideas of nationalism
> take more powers than democracy allows
> start warmongering here and there
> provoked into stupid war againt major power
> lost fucking hard and disposed as result
>start by fetching sandals for clan chief
>become ruler of the entire country
Alex the Average
nah, this guy died much sooner
>Autistic retard ends up being the greatest King in Spanish history
No, he dissapeared in the fog.
charlie the fifth
>I want to unite the people around me and then split it between my sons when I die
2nd
Charlemagne The Great
>DUDE
>I AM MOTHERFUCKING HERACLES
Heracles
Really dude
yup, also not to be a dick but the "magne" part already meant "great"
>"muh land reform"
>dies in a civil war
Hercules?
People don't understand that's the French for Karolus Magnus, they think his name was actually Charlemagne
No, it's not hercules
pompey
>Ambitious sister-fucking manlet from some irrelevant island single-handedly conquers Europe before freezing his army to death in some slavic shithole
>Wants gold
>Takes name Goldberg
Napoleon AND Hitler
>inb4 Austria isn't an Island
Hitler shagged his niece, not his sister
So it's only Napoleon
thomas alva edison
>"LOL, no more my own generation left just because i can't calm this peasant."
>Veeky Forums still believes the Edison stole all of his ideas meme
Edison's genius is in the practicality of everything he made and how it immediately changed lives. The whole Tesla incident is just a blue vein on the massive cock of his legacy
>bantering before it was cool
Uh, can you rephrase this?
Diogenes, unless it's Voltaire in which case you're incorrect. It was very much the cool thing at his time.
>edisonfag with their so called "genius' thing
your edison is just a steve jobs of oldie version
correct
here
>cucked and proud of it
>hurr he actually made money on the things he fiddled with so he's bad
Steve Jobs was an executive, Edison was an inventor and executive. He knew exactly how everything he patented worked. Him not being a beta fag is what made his presence felt so immediately.
here, a (You) for you
Tsar Nicholas II
YUP
N-no one knows who these two are desu?
>Failed Chicano Washington
is he a nordic??
Nope
>"A bit blasphemy in my red movement, is fine too"
Conrad von Hotzendorf
Alexander the Great
>yes help me take my throne, I can pay you lots of money and help you remove infidels
>oops I've been removed by fukkin peasants
>Lmao sorry boys I can't help you anymore
>oh fuck don't sack the city guys
>Don't partition the empire, FUCK
>Dis white bois better take me walk in tha hoodz wit ma throne
Alexios IV
Kang Wewuz VIII
nope
Haile Selassie
Bolivar
>Was the antichrist and also made a healthcare law
Nero?
yup
nope
Hideyoshi.
no
Commodus. He used to enter the arena in Hercules' garb and act like a fucking autist.
Yep, the monkey himself.