You're stuck with this chap in a elevator for an hour

You're stuck with this chap in a elevator for an hour.

What do you do?

Discuss our favorite French monarchs

Talk about the Boer and Irish genocides.

He suddenly goes on a rant about how England won the Hundred Years war. What's your move?

Seeing as how England lost a lot of its French territory, I would disagree that England won.

I ask him if he knows that he's popular on a chinese sweatshop forum.

>the MG42 is unequivocally superior to the Bren, and we wouldn't be stuck in this elevator if it had been built by Americans instead of British people

And then presumably I'd stink up the elevator.

I've been having the farts really bad for a while, I think I might have irritable bowel or something.

Since the British winning in WWII is due to the bren gun alone, then it would also hold true that they won the hundred years war, since the longbow was so great

The stranger starts shouting that nobody spoke French during the 1789 revolution. What is your course of action?

Just stare at him and mouth breath for the full hour

did he really claim that?

That's the story told by the memes.

Nah, however French weren't the only language they spoke.

>trapped in an elevator with nothing but bad sweaters and warped opinions, the only way I'll survive... is by drinking my own piss.

Lindy's sweaters are comfy tho

>ay cuh u wan som fuq in hear
>get neccc

You will NOT survive!

Have a lovely conversation about history, his fame, youtube, and potentially ask for references or contacts. I imagine I would like it :)

Talk about how ridiculous cavalry is as a concept and how pitched battles weren't really significant but rather were just skirmishes in between siege campaigns.

>all the sudden the power goes out
>in the darkness you hear someone laugh at you

*Fake laugher*

I strangle him to death.

Throat sing until his eardrums explode and my throat implodes, killing us both

Is Veeky Forums in love with based Lindy?

Talk shit about Monty and how the failure at Market Garden comes down to his poor decision making and following through when literally everyone around him told him it was a shitty idea in the face of his autistic screeching. When he responds "MUH 90%", I'll reply that the goal was to cross Rhine in order to get to the Ruhr, which they failed to do making it a 100% failure, no matter what the mustachioed retard trying to cover his own ass said.

Ask him why so many militaries use MG3 if its predecessor was so shit.

...

He probably claimed that there was no France language and everybody spoke a different dialect. Which was probably true except for the upper class who all spoke the same way.

Speak French to him for the entire duration

Ask him for sources and see him groveling for the rest of the hour

He's a man so British he probably shit biscuits and piss tea, and make claims that really makes you quake the Queen. Said claims are later hyperbole on Veeky Forums. What's not to love.

Anyone know when the episode of 'Time Commanders' he's in is supposed to air?

Watch as he shrivels up in the presence of another human being.

Youtubers can only function while ranting at a camera; the possibility of real-time opposition shuts them off.

>*unzip baguette*
>*Run away from the front line behind him*
Eh......Noffing personel...l'ami

meant for

ONE NAKED MAN

he said he doesn't drink tea

I ask him how he feels about France.

It was only true in regions like Brittany and Alsace, Napoleon changed that though

"why didnt europe help the byzantines?"

Filename

Tell him that hunnic horse archers were objectively THE BEST.

>What do you do?

Shove a MG42 barrel up his arse

>british
>doesn't drink tea
reported

Ask him if he knows that he is a meme on Veeky Forums.

I try not to listen to his propaganda,and tell my self that everything will be okay.

reminder that Lindybeige claims:

>no one used swords, axes
>no one used horses
>no one used throwing knives
>no one used double strap arm shields
>no one used scythes
>no one used mail coifs
>no one used torches
>Pikemen didn't fight each other
>no one spoke French during the French revolution
>no one spoke Latin during the Roman Republic
>battle of Zama didn't happen
>Romans carried one pilum
>Vikings weren't real
>berserkers weren't real
>climate change isn't real
>stagnant social mobility isn't real
>castles were defended by three soldiers
>butted mail is better than riveted mail
>operation market garden was a success
>Napoleon was literally Hitler
>The Churchill was the best tank in WWII
>The English won the Hundreds Years' War

Talk about D&D and how it's superior to Runequest in every way.

> randomly treating singular words as plural
Holy shit it's Lindy

almost none of those he has said.

Just no, stop

He's your archetypical British Veeky Forumsposter

Fucking hell we need a 2nd Guillaume le Conquérant.

>You're stuck with this chap in a elevator for an hour.
>What do you do?

I do what needs to be done, and hope Veeky Forums will post my bail. I am sure the courts will find it justified.

solicit sex?

Wrong weapon, but I like where you're thinking.

Commend him for his distinguished service to the undeniably extant British Empire, and have a chat on the merits of nobility and rightness an Englishman derives of shooting arrows from a longbow.

Have a long and sincere conversation with him, because he's a nice bloke who I would happily talk to, and deserves none of the abuse he gets