1. Your country

1. Your country
2. Summarise the history of your country

Sweden
>Be vikings
>Stop being vikings
>Be split until the 13th century, fighting many wars against each others and our neighbors.
>Unite and conquer large parts of Finland.
>Get forced into a union with Denmark until we leave permanently in 1523
>Convert from catholic to protestant.
>Also fight a ton of wars against Denmark
>Rise as a great power during the 17th century because of victories against Russia and the HRE
>Lose great power status in early 18th century because of a war against Russia, Poland and Denmark
>Fight on the winning side of the Napoleonic wars and gain Norway because of it.
>Be poor
>Norway leaves the union in early 20th century
>Be kind of-neutral during ww1 and ww2
>Take marshal aid anyway and finally get rich.
>Be somewhat culturally relevant during the rest of the century
>Today

Germany
First:
>HOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUSTHOLOCAUST
Then:
>REPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENTREPENT

US
>Englishmen, Frenchmen, and Spaniards move to different areas here
>The Englishmen get fed up with their government, have a revolution, establish new country
>EXPAND
>Make good moves in the World Wars, become superpower
And here we are.

2. Jesus turned water into wine, we turned water into land

France
>Be Based Gaulish Crusader
>Conquer Iberia(later renamed Celt-Iberia), Albion, Noricum, Dacia, Thracia, Phrygia(later renamed Galatia), Liguria(later renamed Gallia Cisalpina), and Germania in the name Toutatis
>Sack Rome in the name of Toutatis
>Slowly grow weak
>Lose your European Empire little by little
>Be divided because of tribal wars
>Caesar come
>Divide et Impera
>Get BTFO
>Romans start persecuting the Druids
>Hate them a lot
>Get bribed by Romans by building forum, aqueduct, and circus
>Get bribed by Romans by giving citizenship
>Still hate them
>One day, this guy with the big beard speak about the Gaulish God Esus Christ from Galilea, a land inhabited by Oriental Gauls in Asia
>He preach about how Great and Powerful Esus is
>He preach that Salvation only come from him
>The Cult Esus buttthurt the Romans a lot
>Romans are growing weak
>Revolt and create the Eternal Gallic Empire
>Get BTFO
>German scums are on the rise
>Convert to Esustianity
>Powerful and Wise Gauls like Hilary of Poitiers preach the Orthodox and Catholic Esustianity
>The Great Emperor Theodosius make Esustianity the State Religion
>The Empire is collapsing
>A confederation of Gauls and filthy Germans is pushing on the Northern border of Gallia, our Mother, they are filthy pagans
>The Empire collapse
>Filthy German heretics are raping and pillaging everywhere
>The Day of the Lord is nigh !
>Filthy German heretics occupy our Land in the South(Wisigoths) and in the East(Burgundians and Alamanni)
>The confederation of Gauls and filthy Germans invade Gallia(Belgium)
>They BTFO Syagrius(Romans)
>Their chief mary Clothilda
>They BTFO the Allamani
>Their chief convert to Orthodox Esustianity
>Their chief is baptized with 3000 of his warriors
>They BTFO Alaric the Heretic(Wisigoths)
>Sigobert the Pagan die
>Based Hlodowig take his kingdom
>Chararic the Pagan die
>Based Hlodowig take his kingdom
>Hlodowig BTFO Ragnachar and Ricchar and Rignomer

First

Ireland
>be Britain's bitch
>be the scum of Europe for emigrating due to the famine
>failed every revolution we ever tried.
>finally get a large chunk of freedom, although the country is split in half.
> OK with it as we're one of the few colonies to get independence.
>US and USSR bully Britain into giving everyone full independence.
>OK with it again because maybe we're one of their closest neighbors
>they offer Scotland full independence without any fuss.
>tfw you realize you were the only colony not to get full independence.

>Jews
>be nomads, write cool stories about it
>settle, be tribal confederacy of poor peasants, write cool stories about it
>switch to monarchy but than have a civil war and split to two, write stories about it making yourself look more important than you really were
>be shitty at geopolitics and bet on Egypt against Assyria and get the northen part btfo
>be shitty again and bet on Assyria against Babylon and get the southern part btfo
>persians are nice dudes let you go home
>become a priestly theocracy
>get taken over by Greeks, get mindfucked by their culture have multiple civil wars and emerge as unexpected winners against crumbling Selecuids
>The elite goes full tier hellenistic, constantly involve Roman politicians in their civil wars until independence is lost but nobody cares because Rome is cool
>Rome are not cool after all, rebel repeatedly until you are made an example of by being exiled (again) your land's name is changed and you are not allowed in your capital city
>an offshoot of your religion is perceived as cool new age thing and takes over the empire
>the offshoot doesn't like you for that time you treated them as heretics.
>try to rebel againd Byzantium one last time but Sassanids are gay and weak
>concentrate on mystical things and spirituality while the known world burns around you
>get a brake but always get recked in a same repeating pattern for being a foreign element that is to smart for its own good
>enlightenment - contribute to different knowledge fields but get singled out by haters of each of those ideologies
>envision a national revival project inspired by other national movements
>get recked by a madman in a way no one got recked since ancient times, frankly for no fault of your own
>get your independence back but now you are the enemy of billion people. Thank god they are drulling retards because mongols hit them so hard back than
>at least you have a long history and what does not kill you makes you stronger

>Hlodowig descents are mostly shit
>Theodoric is based tho
>They conquer clay, and slaughter themselves
>Time pass
>One day Sandniggers BTFO the Goths
>Time pass
>Sandniggers try to invade Gallia
>The Merovinguians are shit
>Charles Martel come
>He unify Gallia
>He BTFO them
>The Merovingians are BTFO
>He die
>Pepin the short become King
>He die
>Charlemagne become king
>He BTFO the Saxons
>He BTFO the Sandniggers
>He BTFO the Lombards
>He BTFO the Thuringians
>He BTFO the Carinthians
>He BTFO the Avars
>He is Crowned Emperor
>He die
>Louis the Pious become king
>He die
>Louis II,Lothar, and Charles
>Time Pass
>West Middle and East Francia kill each other for a bit of Clay
>CAPETIANS MASTER RACE
>Crusades against sandniggers
>Kill each other
>Time pass
>Napoleonic Wars
>Franco-Prussian War
>WW1
>WW2
>Peace
>Rapefugee Crisis

>Texas
>be God's taint for all of existence
>insectoid aliens arrive in West Texas and the american southwest
>reptilians arrive, vanquished temporarily, black saurian spirits locked away in the earth by insectoids
>injuns arrive from north, worship insectoid aliens, become their pet project
>East Texas indigenous peoples wiped out by swamp diseases well before the white man ever arrives
>insectoid aliens and advanced indian shamans hide deep in the earth to establish the Chihuahuan Desert Deep State catacombs
>europeans arrive with the two national treasures of Texas: guns and horses
>every human nation on earth lays claim to Texas
>ultimately surface mostly conquered by Anglo/Celtic Calvinists; Germans in central Texas, Mexicans hold steady fortress in Rio Grande Vallley to this day, insectoid aliens remain vigilant
>public annexation by the USA, secretly a 500 year contract between rival calvinist deep states
>Texas single-handedly wins the Civil War
>poor and destitute, retarded yankee migrants unearth the black saurian phylactery fluids, unleashing reptilian spirits onto the world, spurring the industrial revolution, and causing global mayhem
>Texas single-handedly wins WW1
>Texas single-handedly wins WW2
>reptilian spirits wounded again, flee to the labs of Texas Instrument where in 1958 their spirits possess Jack Kilby who channels them into the invention of the first Integrated Circuit
>November 22, 1963, after signing a near truce between the reptilians and insectoid guardians, in hopes of reigning a transhuman utopia for mandkind, President Kennedy is shot in Dallas by possesed rogue draconian agent
>February 11, 1974; birth of a baby boy, Alexander Emerick Jones

>Be China
>Unify
>You're all Qin now
>Collapse
>Ayy yo HOL up we Iz Han an shit
>Collapse
>Ayy yo HOL up we Iz Tang an shit
>Like this forever