The grace and peace of the Lord be upon you, my name is Brother Ken.
I’m a 27 year old American Orthodox (the really real christians for all you heretics). I make prayer ropes out of boot laces, and spend my days perfecting my hesychastic breathing techniques and reading the Cappodocian Fathers. (Basil the Great, Gregory of Nyssa, Gregory of Nazianzus)
I train in heschastic prayer and breathing with my prayer rope daily, this superior method of prayer can cut clean through imagination and prelest because it was developed over thousands of years by the apostolic church, and is vastly superior to any other method of prayer, especially those derived from Thomism. I earned my icon painting license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.
I speak Greek fluently, both Dimotiki and Old Church Slavonic, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about Byzantine history and their imperial code, which I follow 100%
When I get my Greek visa, I am moving to Ouranoupoli to attend a prestigious Monastery to learn more about their magnificent religious practices. I hope I can become a monk of the great schema, or even patriarch of constantinople!
I own several monastic habits, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to Greece, so I can fit in easier. I say Κύριε, ελέησον and speak Russian as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond.
Wish me luck in Greece!
The grace and peace of the Lord be upon you, my name is Brother Ken
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>Catholic makes bait thread to smear Orthodox Christianity as obsessed with mysticism and Byzantine dress-up
Nothing to see here, folks.
What do you call this type of copy pasta
I've seen it with hitler before
Ken-sama.
This, tbqh.
Nowadays it's less about Byzantine LARPing and more about driving in luxury cars and sucking the State's cock.
Get your facts correctly, OP.
>implying it's a catholic and not a Protestant or Jew
I'm Catholic and love our Orthodox brothers.
>prayer ropes out of boot laces
Damn man, that sounds legit as fuck in the right context
Ave, my name is Gundemar.
I'm a 27 year old Gothic foederatus (a warrior attached to the Roman army for you civilians!). I transcribe Vergilian epic and imperial panegyric on my tabula, and spend my days reading superior Latin classics (Seneca, The Conquest of Gaul, Meditations).
I train with my scutum everyday, this superior shield can stop any barbarian arrow or spear-thrusts over a thousand times, and is superior to any other kind of shield in the world. I completed my pilum training two years ago, and i'm getting better everyday.
I speak Latin fluently, both Septentrional and Meridional dialect. I write fluently as well. I know everything about Roman history and their Twelve Tables, which I follow 100%.
When I get my citizenship, I am moving to Ravenna to join a fabulous collegium to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a Tribunus or even a Magister Militum!
I own several tunics, which I wear around the municipium. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to Italia so I can fit in easier. I give the dextera salute and perform acclamatio to local duces and speak Latin to them as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond.
Wish me luck in the Empire!
You're also a total pussy.
good luck brother ken
this was posted by a proddy
t.internet toughguy
problem is this actually seems plausible. Try harder.
it's a meme you dip
It's basically Alaric.
Still makes it true, kiss-ass.
>spend my days reading superior Latin classics (Seneca, The Conquest of Gaul, Meditations)
>Meditations
>Latin
The Meditations of Marcus Aurelius was written in Greek, not Latin. Can you even read Greek and Latin, m8? Do you even have a PhD in Classics?
he tried his best leave him alone autismo man
>Brother Ken
American Orthodox converts always go by some ridiculous Slavic name and get mad if you call them their real one.
Kenislav Jamesovich Robertsonov
Wait, really?
checked
As a Catholic, I was a little disappointed it wasn't about us, but it wouldn't have made as much sense. I haven't seen Ken-sama in years.
Patriarch Kirill known as corrupt piece of shit among Russian liberals, whole church is rotten.
This is the cutest post I've ever seen on Veeky Forums
Good luck in Ravenna Gundemar!
To be honest though, every church is going to have a corrupt son of a gun running things eventually, since you're still drawing from the stock of flawed humans. Not like every pope was without sin either, else we'd still be one unified church.
"And therefore, there should be one body and one head, not two heads like a monster."
I can dig that, but that doesn't mean I have to despise the Orthodox as people. Even if I don't think they're right, they're still fine people. All the better if they come around one day.
You called them brothers, this bull denies that
That "I'm CIA" pose, though...
Hakuna Matata, my name is Jumbo Gumbo
I'm a 27 year old Norwegian afriboo(african fan for you white devils). I draw with berries and maggots on my stone tablet, and spend my days perfecting my art and playing superior African games. (Starving to death, Aids, Ball in a cup)
I train with my bostaff every day, this superior weapon can't cut clean through anything because it's a stick, and is vastly inferior to any other weapon on earth. I earned my bostaff license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.
I speak mouth clicking fluently, both Hibbity and Bibbity dialect, and I make lines in sand fluently as well. I know everything about African history and their tribal codes, which I follow 100%.
When I get my African visa, I am moving to the Congo to not attend a prestigious college because there isn't one. I hope I can make it to age 50!
I try to not wear anything around town. I want to get used to walking around butt naked before I move to Africa, so I can fit in easier.
Wish me luck!
>among Russian liberals
Literally who cares.
Gold