You suddenly appear, exactly as you are right now, in the Roman forum in 150AD. Realistically, what do you do?

You suddenly appear, exactly as you are right now, in the Roman forum in 150AD. Realistically, what do you do?

Also, your Latin is limited to whatever you currently know

I'm naked... so get thrown out?

Once someone figures out that you basically know nothing of the world at that time you're gonna be enslaved and get thrown into the arena/onto the latifundia/into the whorehouse depending on your physical characteristics.

Unless you know the Greek classics in which case you could be a tutor.

die

My grandmother was a professor of classical history, so I'm good.

I look like a Gael/proto-Viking though? And I'm naked.

Get enslaved because Germanic and/or be reviled/worshipped for the phone in my hands

Cogito ergo sum quid pro quo veni vidi vici alea iacta est Deus ex machina ad hominem Alma mater primo victoria ave maria persona non grata pax Americana magnum opus in vitro habeas corpus et tu, Brute? Deus vult curriculum de facto carpe diem ultimatum dies irae tu quoque non sequitur Sic semper tyrannis. Et cetera

DEUS VULT

Jack off

I got a pretty nice shirt on right now, I suppose I could sell that to a noble for some dosh

I'll earn a living as an entertainer. I'll introduce Rap to the masses. I'll spit about the pleb lyfe in vulgar latin from the future. I'll use the term Futuristic ebonics.

kill myself

>check my phone
>still 59% battery life

I use my stock of photos to spread Kekism to the leaders of a noble Emprire

I'm literate and my mother tongue comes from Latin so I should be fine. Would take me a year and half to speak some decent Latin.

Also I could probably apply my knowledge from today into the past, perhaps say some philosophical bullshit and become one of the most famous philosophers of Rome.

Haha 97%

>appear in the middle of Rome during the reign of one of its most boring Emperors wearing an anime t-shirt

I'll bide my time until Marcus Aurelius comes to power, then get close to Commodious, introduce him to the wonders of 2D and watch as he goes down in history as Rome's greatest Emperor for his staging of K-ON in Pompey's Theater.

Will I know roman Latin?

Apparently no, unless you do now.

Use my knowledge of the future to make profitable gambles at the hippodrome.

Shitpost in that forum as hard as I can.

Okay I'll admit, that's kind of clever.

>the first people who'll be able to somewhat understand me are 600 years away from getting their asses to the immediate vicinity

Run, offer some of my shit for a tunic, try to learn latin. Get a nice job because I know how to read and write, get qt gf, die.

boipussi

>not a Roman citizen
>can't speak the language
>look like a gaul
>no one knows me

Try not to get enslaved on my way to find Valentinus. Hope that I can convince him that I am a spiritual person and not material.

Spend the rest of my life receiving the gnosis that allows me to return to the divine pleroma.

> Realistically, what do you do?

As I don’t speak Latin, (or any ancient language) my only hope would be finding some Hebrews and showing them my circumcised cock, ('Murrican here) in the hope they’d take me in as some kinda long lost crazy Jew.

Have an orgy?

*inhales deeply*
TRUE
*starts sweating profusely*

haha i dont have a phone

>be an electrical engineer
>know Greek

There are worst combos I guess

>naked albanian looking guy in his underwear with sweaty as fuck balls

Freak out and get killed probably.

I know some modern Italian, would that help me at all?

Probably go to the nearest homosexual orgy and offer myself up as a bottom for endless use.

assume whatever rank an orange (i would have to be rich to have orange right) shirt gets you and plow my way through as much 13 years old puss as possible

>I'm in a bathrobe and pajama pants.
>I use glasses
>I've got myopia and astigmatism
>yes both
>I already need to get new glasses

Well I'm fucked.

Ask for the directions to a crypt to find my fellow Christians and ask them how big Jesus' wang really was and if I can chew on his foreskin

>Gay niqqas from outer space

first off im not a manlet in ancient rome cos 5'9 is like 3 inches above average

next, i know physics but everything i know will get me killed. everyone else is buff as fuck and i have no survival skills

the only thing i could feasibly do is revolutionize mathematics but that's a long shot trying to avoid getting speared to death while i point at things and write "1 2 3 4 5" down while screaming

as long as you know the roman numerals to equate the number scribbles to you'll be fine.

of course eventually you'll teach it to someone that actually matters and they will just take the credit.

because who the fuck are you? crazy numbers guy?

whatever keeps me alive t b h f a m
if i ever end up learning their language i'll just write a book of shit that will seem vapid to everyone but get hailed as genius a thousand years later about the structure of the atom or something and how charge works with glass/silk rubbing and so on
would i be more or less vulnerable to diseases? i mean my ancestors survived the black plague and shit right?

>get hailed as genius a thousand years later
Make sure you print it on something that lasts. Very few ancient texts remain.

>invent paper from linen rags
>become rich
>use money to become famous
>invent better number system
>stick it to this guy

I'd probably run. I mean I can't speak thier language and the Romans weren't fond of pants so I'd probably look and sound like a freak of nature

I get a lot of weird looks because I would be like the only white person there.

Romans in Rome didn't make a habit of randomly killing every foreigner they ran into even if they were wearing pants.

I mean if every foreign merchant that entered Italia got his ass stabbed no one would fucking bother bringing nice things to Rome now would they?

this

They'll mistake you for a retard user.

>one of the most famous philosophers of Rome
Pretty sure you'd be the first

anywhere i can get more info about this?
google screwing with me right now

>anywhere i can get more info about this?
Just check out plutarch. Nigga wrote like 40 books and we have 12 or some other stupid number

>tfw born 2 late to graffiti pompeii
>tfw born 2 early to travel the seas
might as well just kill myself

150AD is like the 2000's of Ancient Rome

>193 cm
>Blonde
>Blue eyed
>Currently bare-footed.

Probably gonna be enslaved as a Germanic barbar.

ancient cocks were probably much smaller

first thing i'd do is hit up a brothel and make a name for myself

Travel to Sparta, start the Spartan clan before it's glory years

I have no language skills. Nor any trainable items on me. At best I'd manage to get a gruesome slavelike job until I learn the language. After that, provided I am still alive, I might be able to produce some amusing trinket for some cash. Eventually, if I play my cards right, I might be able to create some black powder. From there on, it's all based on luck.

Ya'd think the fact that you suddenly appeared out of nowhere speaking in tongues might have some affect on the possibilities.

These are the people you share the board with

Show them my phone, that'd be a hoot

Find all the other anons in this thread who were also transported, work together until we can speak Latin, then pool our knowledge to become the world's greatest engineers, doctors, and mathematicians.

Haha i like thos plan.

I'm 6'3 so i would be towering over them

sweat profusely and try to mumble something using my 4 years of half-assed classical high school.
I wouldn't be able to help the Romans much outside of informing them about basic geology and even then they'd probably not listen to me.

>play it off
>walk out of the senate
>walk out of rome
>walk out of italy
>walk out of mainland europe
>walk out of england
>walk out of ireland
>walk out of newfoundland
>walk out of florida
>walk out of cuba
>walk out of south america
>walk out of the spice islands
>walk into australia
>shitpost about romans with aboriginal wall paint

>Look Gaius, that weirdo is talking jibberish!
>primo victoria
Fucking Sabaton, it's PRIMA not primo!
>Americana
wut
>Deus vult
Don't you mean Dei, stranger?

Well I mean the alternative is the same as everyone else.
>Don't speak ancient Latin
>Look Germanic
>Get arrested because you're probably breaking a thousand different laws you aren't aware of
>Die in a gladiatorial match or by execution

This is probably the best plan ITT. People from industrial societies are way more codependent than the Romans. I highly doubt you'd get the full spectrum of activities of Veeky Forums but it's better than nothing.

Get together with the /hisNEETs/ that were also transported there, form a legion and march on Rome.

>yfw you try to impress them into worshiping you like a fire god or something by showing off your lighter, but that shit isn't like in the movies and the greatest crime in Roman law is arson, so you get burned alive for setting a small fire with your fire gadget

go to the closest aquaduct and sneeze into it. start the 1st great plauge.

Tell them about America and explain why Rome should conquer it.

>becoming the first australian shitposter

Jump off an aqueduct because I can't speak Latin but before I do, show them the vast library of reaction images on my phone.

This, user you're a genius.

>speaking in tongues

You say tongues, they hear a naked man babbling 'barbarbarbar'.

Die but before that, ensure I've loss hidden somewhere

I'll fling shit, discuss sea peoples and see what relatively modern inventions I can engineer up.

Probably get spooked, run away to some woods and go live in feral Europe as a crazy dude in the forests.

Im a relatively big guy for the time. Id probably be enslaved and made into a gladiator if I am lucky. Maybe invent actual weight sets and teach people how to get fucking jacked to the tits for the emperor?

>get hired by gladiator school
>make them all ripped af
>get all the slave pussy I can dream of
>feelsgoodman.jpg

I'll become the best bathouse man, even the emperor will comission my construcions.

i wuz a roman so i wouldnt have any problem to fit in the roman society

I'm tall, fit and attractive so I figure I'll be drafted into some rich man's household as a pleasure slave for his cutie daughters.

If not that then I would probably die of sepsis while wandering around asking passerbys "romani? romani?"

Be a doctor and a scientists slave

>letting your daughters being sluts before they marry Crassus

>Have a gun currently on me
Sneak into some Noble's house, shoot his dog, force him to teach me Latin.
Go to imperial palace, start popping caps in guards, claim Mars sent me and demand to speak to the emperor.
Make him create new laws that prevent the empire to converting to any other religion and being divided into multiple emperors. Otherwise the empire will suffer the weather of the gods.
Roman empire is still here today, you're welcome

Also, give the emperor my gun and teach him how it works in exchange for basic necessities for the rest of my life.

>he's a magistrate in a backwater province

invent the crossbow

if roman empire would reform today it would be the largest islamic state in the world

...

shitpost on behalf of the senate and leak marcus aurelius' meditations even though most of them havent been written yet

Eh, better leave Britain out then

Travel to Delphi, be oracle

I would die from my type-1 diabetes

This, but instead, we shitpost grafittis on walls all over Rome for anons to discover 2000+ years later

>Caligula did nothing wrong

>There is literally nothing wring with being jewish

>Great fire of Rome was an inside job

You could also try to find an educated man and show him some basic mathematical theorems and axioms, to show that you're not a complete retard, and just unable to communicate with the common tongue

I'd also try to eventually explain three-field system for agriculture (which would upstage their two-field system), and could yield much more food, which could get you the attention of governors.

Also, I would probably get murdered on sight, as I am wearing Crocs.

Phone at 100% with Roman/English dictionary on it. Awesome. Call for paper and ink as fast as I can to write down as many necessary words as I can for my vocabulary. Draw a map of the world, locate Rome, Carthage, Egypt, Syria, Britain as well as China, Japan, N and S America and indicate I'm from N America. Tell them about medicine and flatter them for their political power.
Eventually? Just become a baker or something I guess and collect as much lost history as I can and store it in a secure place for posterity.

> play music on phone to show magic powers

> show the script I wrote using Google translate to a rich senator

> It says he just needs to take me into his home and teach me Latin and treat me well and I'll teach him how to make magic phone devices like mine

>Spend rest of life as Rich household guest, teaching them to boil water and double entry bookkeeping.

> No job so can drink all day
>Opium legal
> No age of consent so loli slave girls

Sounds good

I'll just become a vagrant living in the streets, shouting insanities in my native language nobody understands while slowly dying from diabetes.

Be really tall.