A squad of khmer rouge troops break into your house and say you are to be relocated somewhere safe

>a squad of khmer rouge troops break into your house and say you are to be relocated somewhere safe

what do?

*dies*

Hide my glasses

*teleports behind them*

this time it's personal

don't speak French

Call police and tell them some asian hobos want to kidnap me

Get in the back of the truck and sit between two guards.
Once we're in the jungle I pretend I have explosive diarrhea and am about to shit myself. To prevent getting shit on their shit-coloured fatigues, they tell me to do it off the back of the truck.
Pointing their guns at me I assume the position, only to flip off the back and roll into the ditch by the roadside and run like hell into the dense jungle.
Once there I begin to sharpen punji sticks and prepare to wage guerilla warfare against the slant eyes who took my anime.

Sigh and get a shovel

z

Tell them how much I adore farming

Just step over them since they are all turbo manlets

Remind them that, being an American citizen, I am paying their salaries.

Continue masturbating while maintaining eye contact with them.

Is the death not the safest place?

...

Accuse their leader of being very well-spoken and start wondering if he hadn't had too much to read.

Kek

I show them my college degree, thick glasses, and baby-soft hands, and I tell them to just fuck my shit up.

this thread is gold

call my vietnamese neighbours

Tell them I'm a house servant and get a privileged position in a government job.

heh

tell them Angkar has given me direct orders to stay in the city and star them down