Wake up

>wake up
>it's 1819 and you are Simon Bolivar
How do you keep this thing afloat?

i'd rather wake up as an anaconda desu

this

Sell the country to the USA for 1 cent.

You don't. You just sell the whole lot by pieces to your freemason masters and pocket the money before they put a bullet in your head for being a bad goy.

Then go live the life in the Hacienda.

Kill Jose Antonio Páez
Listen to those colombians who were rebelling against the dictatorship... they were into something
Move the ecuadorian politicians from Quito to Popayán
Start full trade with the United States

Literally this.

Give as much territory to the gringos as quickly as possible, so that at least some of it will turn out halfway decent.

Literally just a Spanish Infante and set-up a constitutional monarchy. If the spanish block it offer it to a Portuguese or Italian royal.

Bolivar was the farthest thing from a democrat, he wanted an inherited senate. But without legitimacy for the oligarchy it was a clusterfuck. The victory in The north was an unexpected accident, and most of the those people, especially in Venezuela, were partial to Spanish liberalism. Monarchies worked in latin-America. Brazils was well received and the republicans were ashamed of themselves when they exiled the Emperor.

THIS.

Adapt the colonial institutions to a sovereign nation-state. Exactly like John VI made in Brazil. No political instability.

But, what's the use of being the emperor when you have no chin?

>be fucking Andy Jackass
>unable to give a shit about foreigners unless they're bongs coming after muh plantation
>somehow through bald-eagle-tears magic a piece of impenetrable jungle clay becomes better.

I don't see how Americans would make Colombia Great for Once. The Philipines were a virtual colony of theirs and nowadays is a fucking shithole.

They can't. Nobody can.

Shame that the Latinos never got their shit together, because an alt-Latin America that consisted of Argentina, Brazil, Colombia, Mexico and the Caribbean (with a U.S. State of Panama/Costa Rica) would have been far better for humanity.

Regionalism only left the Latinos subject to foreign interference.

Whoever made that map is completely clueless about Latin America. KYS pls.

Invest in Roman-tier roads to unite the country.

Dig the Panama canal and make money.

What do you buy with the cent?

For real. That would be dope if you were still sentient.

...

>ignoring the natural borders presented by the andes mountains
fucking retard

t. hamilton

>The Philipines were a virtual colony of theirs and nowadays is a fucking shithole
Better off than they would've been. There's a reason Filipinos love America.

He was not that beautiful, but was the best monarch of his dynasty.

Invite Germans in to homestead and develop the country.

op said keep this thing afloat

Don't declare myself emperor for life.

Buy nukes from Russia

Because we proved that we were marginally better than the Japanese?