How the fuck can Chad eat pizza everyday and maintain his gains?

nice thread

A+ twitch chat level of posting quality

Again with Chad eats pizza? Holy Shit you're a faggot.

I mean really, not even original greentext? Really? This right here, this is autism. Not Veeky Forums "lel autistic XDD" autism, no. This is legitimate, medical grade autism. This is what mothers everywhere fear when they find out they're pregnant. This is what gets put up for adoption because parents "aren't ready for this type of responsibility". This is what Midwest American idiots think comes as a result of vaccination. This is what kills families. This is what kids think of when they hear "slow". This is fucking autism.
You are so fucking reported. I can't believe you bring this "HEIGHT FACE FRAME" shit in here again and again and again. You listen here you underaged shitdicked little cumguzzler: THIS. ISN'T. FUNNY. It's not cute or charming or something that gives people a smile, it's a waste of time, a waste of space, and an eyesore. You make me worry, really really worry about the state of my generation where the hell is our world gonna go if it's run by shit-stained cuntminds like you that have NO originality and NO creative drive AT ALL. You contribute nothing at all to this board, nothing at all to your fellow peers. You are worse than a dumbass my asinine little friend, you are a black hole of faggotry and stupidity. You suck in the people around you and corrupt them with your cancerous posts. Your very existence is robbing this world of all things good. Leave this place, sell your computer, give the money to someone with brains who can wisely use it, and then kill yourself you waste of life. Die.

i regret my decision

i shouldve posted the navy seal instead

wait why are there so many images of half naked dudes with pizza?

In demand by tumblrfats. It's their ultimate fantasy. A hot chiseled man who not only wants to fuck you, but has a pizza in hand with every topping you could want. He knows what you want, what you need. You can stuff your face while he satisfies your needs. He'll whisper sweet nothings in your ear as you lick your fingers from all that sauce.

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

While your in the PIZZA, JIM is eating CHAD

Burns a lot of calories by going outside and fucking.

I eat pizza all the fucking time. It works for me because
>i usually use healthy toppings
>thin crust fot better pr/fat/carb ratio
>i dont eat dairy alot so the cheese helps me out
>I count calories and I'm only 20

Someone post the original chad pizza copypasta.

that aint chad, chad doesn't have no weak shoulders, get that fucking shit out of my face

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little manlet? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the FACE, HEIGHT, FRAME, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret PIZZA cookoffs, and I have over 300 confirmed PIZZA. I am trained in gorilla FRAME and I’m the top HEIGHT in the entire US. You are nothing to me but just another manlet. I will wipe my ass with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, manlet. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of CHADS across the USA and your PIZZA is being traced right now. The PIZZA that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your dick. You’re fucking dead, manlet. I can be anyFACE, anyHEIGHT, and anyFRAME. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed PIZZA, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Dominoes and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking PIZZA, manlet.

DAILY REMINDER

You hit the GYM HARD, while Chad eats pizza

Girls look at your gymcel body and think "ewww what a try hard" while they look at the chad and think "i love him, he just does what he wants, not even concerned about the whole bodybuilding thing".

Chad STILL looks INFINITELY better than you because of his GENETICALLY DETERMINED HEIGHT, FRAME and FACE.

Women are getting more and more choice and validation and its either CHAD or NOTHING

Why haven't you gymcels learnt yet?

It's either ALPHA GENETICS, or BETA RESULTS.

i can't take it anymore

> enter gym by using my PERFECT 20/20 VISION to perfectly grip the doorknob with my monster HANDS, opening it swiftly and beautifully
> can barely fit my massive FRAME through the door
> immediately every woman in the gym begins to STARE at my amazing FACE and FRAME
> my HEIGHT also makes them wet
> female staff member asks if I need any HELP
> 'is it your first TIME HERE SIR?' she says looking UP at my perfect FACE
> 'does my FRAME look like it is need of any help?
> walk my 6'7" FRAME to the squat rack using my LONG LEGS
> there is a guy there training his "LEGS"
> I guess he missed HEIGHT DAY
> he takes one look at me and LEAVES
> i don't know if it was the HEIGHT, FACE or FRAME that did it. How should I know? I have it ALL
> Do a 225 OVERHEAD PRESS AS A WARMUP
> MIRES FROM ALL
> Keep working up to a 4PL8 OHP, last SET
> get it UP FOR 6
> cheers from EVERYONE
> I gesture to my INCREDIBLE BODY
> "HEIGHT,"
> I place my palms on the top of squat rack
> "FACE,"
> I smile the nicest smile ever
> "FRAME,"
> hoist up two blondes on my SHOULDERS
> "WHAT CAN I SAY, ITS ALWAYS MY DAY"
> leave the gym with 2 BLONDES HANGING OFF MY ARMS
> PEOPLE ARE ROARING WITH PRAISE
> GENETICS are LITERALLY EVERYTHING
> EVERYTHING

underrated post

Because Chad goes to the gym everyday inste4ad of finishing work, going home and fapping to trap porn or whatever.

I think you did well dude

>Chad takes all the girls
>Chad takes all the gains
>Chad takes all the pizza

What's left for us?

>>thin crust

why the hate on bread?

B-but muh when, muh 2pl8s m8s, muh 5x5 its all a lie?

The path of the righteous man

>WHAT CAN I SAY, ITS ALWAYS MY DAY

kek everytime

quality thread so far

You have no HEIGHT
You have no FRAME
This ugly manlet has a funny FACE
Chad can HANDSTAND, when he needs to
And fuck your gf, to KEK you
Backflips himself, just like a CHEETAH
This crazy CHAD just digs this PIZZA

C'mon, Rich, take it to the fridge
Egg whites, peanuts, coconut shells
Grapes melons oranges and cocoa pebbles
CMON

ever heard of dirty bulking, robot?

YOU read tonnes of books in the hopes that your erudition will impress girls. CHAD didn't even read the books assigned to his college classes and he gets girls WET without talking to them.

YOU read in cafes while awkwardly trying to make eye contact with girls in the hope that they'll give you a concrete sign to talk to them or, in your daydreams, they'll talk to you. CHAD has dozens of matches from local college girls on Tinder, ALL of them craving him.

YOU study history, philosophy, economics, and politics in order to obtain wisdom and a logical framework that lets you powerfully analyse any idea or person. CHAD hasn't even realised that W and H.W. are different people yet he uses his charm to beat you at job interviews, the workplace, and outshines you in the unstructured domain of social situations, especially the SEX-MARKET that is modern night clubs.

YOU pay attention to your diet while maintaining a structured weightlifting routine that results in your 4 plate squat, which garners you zero attention. CHAD goes to the gym infrequently yet has bigger arms than you, a lower body fat, and makes girls SALIVATE over him.

YOU weren't on the top of the social heirarchy formed within the unique and non-repeatable high school experience, which permanently branded you with disapproval from girls who didn't care about you when they were at their most authentic. CHAD was craved in high school by dozens of girls with FRESH pussies, which only solidified his incredible high school experience and optimistic outlook on life.

Y-you can have the crust after Chad is done licking it

All of you betas are missing the point. You don't to the gym for women, you can get woemn without being fit. You do it be healthy and better yourself. If you want women so much, focus on becoming rich.

>the music section
that way user

>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little fuck? I’ll have you know I fucked top of my fuck in the Navy Fucks, and I’ve been fucked in numerous secret fucks on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed fucks. I am fucked in gorilla fuckfare and I’m the top fucker in the entire fucking US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another fuck. I will fuck you the fuck out with fucks likes of which has never fucking been fucked before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can fuck away with fucking that fuck to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we fuck I am fucking my fucked network of fucks across the USA and your IP is fucking being fucked right now so you better prepare for the fucking, maggot. The fucking that fucks out the pathetic little fuck you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can fuck anywhere, anytime, and I can fuck you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare fucking hands. Not only am I extensively fucked in unarmed combat, but I have fucking access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Fucks and I will fuck it to its full extent to fuck your fucking ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have fucked what unholy retribution your little fucking “clever” comment was about to fuck down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re fucking the price, you fucking idiot. I will shit fuck all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

>takeout pizza every day
I'm all for a Mexican hot and spicy from new yorkers once a month or something but every day?

>this is what fatties actually believe

Because they are eating in secret.

They order salad when everyone can see them, but when they are home alone they stuff their face with chocolate chips and cry.

All fat chicks eat like whales, that's why they are fat.

>> I guess he missed HEIGHT DAY

>Believing whales

Nah dude i think your just a faggot.

Because it's only the pizza he eats you fat fuck

Are you purposefully being a retard or did that actually go over your head?

is pizza supposed to be bad for you? I don't get this stupid meme

each slice is like 300 calories. if all you eat is 6 slices a day, you're not going to become fat and lose all your muscles

Fucking killed me dude. Only you could have gone to detail on how the gym descended into an orgy where you fuck pizza and eat women.

There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn't he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.

I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Pizza thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don't even fill in the captcha. Maybe you're such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a Veeky Forums pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The "epic" Chad guy, isn't it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it's ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that's right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she's probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on Veeky Forums posting about a capeshit movie. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic beta NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can't even try to talk with you because all you say is "HEIGHT FACE FRAME HEIGHT FACE FRAME." You've become a parody of your own self. And that's all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he's done a million times now. And that's all you'll ever be.

Pizza being bad is a normie meme, it has at least 3 important food groups, has a lot of protein, and if you just count your calories you can literally eat it for the rest of your life and not have a single problem. Enjoy your calcium and lycopene!

Good protein depending on the topping/cheese, some bases have a good carb profile, it's one the better bulking foods.

IIFYM

Holy fuck I died

>seriously implying pizza is bad for you
As long as you aren't buying it from papa johns or some other shit it's really good for you.
I make a shrimp pizza ever week.
Tons of fiber, vegetables, protein, lots of poly/mono unsaturated fats.
Chad obviously does cardio, unlike Veeky Forums

This is honestly the best fucking pasta that I've ever read

I lol'ed reading that multiple times

vocaroo.com/i/s13LTVlox3jd

If you're from the UK you can buy this pizza as a cheat meal.

>my aesthetic labrador VLAD

how is that a cheat meal?

20g protein 180kcal

autism

630 calories in the entire pizza then I eat a bag of crisps after.

CHEAT MEAL KEK

People tend to eat it in excess or in combination with foods that will put them in excess, and it's mostly a normie thing.

If you ate 2 frozen pepperoni & sausage pizzas a day your nutrient profile would look something like:
120g protein, 230g carbs (30g sugar), 135g fat, 2600 calories

anyone have the vlad dog pasta

shit is goat

if you consider that a cheat meal then you must eat chicken and broccoli every day

This is one hell of an autistic post

heheheheheh very nice.

>nipples the size of the pepperonis on the pizza
that's no chad, that's an ex fatass

Fucking kek

Holy shit, mirin.

this, I ate 2 frozen pizzas a day and nothing else for 4 years in university and it was great, cheap as fuck, nutritious and fast

?!?!?!

Is this legit?

Holy shit, if this is true I have found my new lifetime daily meal(s).

because he wants to.

Yes it's legit, pizza isn't some magical food that makes you fat, it's just a bunch of fairly nutritious ingredients put together in a convenient manner. Saw a vice episode about a dude who eats nothing but pizza for 15 years or something, he was thin as fuck too. If you watch your calories and protein you can eat whatever the fuck you want almost.

why whould someone pick up the peperonies from the pizza and put them into his fucking tities before taking a pic

*slow claps*
*steps out of the shadows*
Heh... not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your meme, I mean. It's not bad. A good first attempt. It's plenty dank... I can tell it's got some thought behind it... lots of quotable material...
But memeing isn't all sunshine and rainbows, kid. You're skilled... that much I can tell. But do you have what it takes to be a Memester? To join those esteemed meme ranks? To call yourself a member of the Ruseman's Corps?
Memeing takes talent, that much is true. But more than that it takes heart. The world-class Memesters - I mean the big guys, like Johnny Hammersticks and Billy Kuahana - they're out there day and night, burning the midnight meme-oil, working tirelessly to craft that next big meme.
And you know what, kid? 99 times out of a hundred, that new meme fails. Someone dismisses it as bait, or says it's "tryhard," or ignores it as they copy/paste the latest shitpost copypasta dreamt up by those sorry excuses for cut-rate memers over at reddit. The Meme Game is rough, kid, and I don't just mean the one you just lost :^). It's a rough business, and for every artisan meme you craft in your meme bakery, some cocksucker at 9gag has a picture of a duck or some shit that a million different Johnny No-Names will attach a milion different captions to.
Chin up, kid. Don't get all mopey on me. You've got skill. You've got talent. You just need to show your drive.

See you on the boards....