Mental Fitness General
Veeky Forumsbros with mental illnesses, how do you deal?
I was recently diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, and every day is a battle with myself. Every few days I swing between working out really hard, focusing on my hobbies, disregarding women and raging alcoholism and suicidal depression. It fucking sucks.
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God damn this is me exactly. one day I'm on top of the world, killing it in the gym, pulling babes, loving life, and the next I'm a total worthless piece of shit.
what even is this life
Mental illness is a Jew meme. There's a huge industry that trick goyim like you into purchasing pharmaceutical meds.
This life is the worst, man.
It's also the best sometimes.
Joke's on you, no medication for BPD
>how do you deal?
Psychedelics. I'm 31 and have had anxiety since i can remember. I've never been sXe, but i also don't do any drugs because of my work (random drug tests).
I can definitely say that after doing shrooms three times since march, my life has changed for the better. There's no hostility or anxiety when in large groups. I've learned to accept people more than ever (even with faults). Music sounds more amazing than ever. I find comfort in being in nature.
It's difficult to articulate, but ego dissolution is real and very powerful. I wouldnt recommend tripping if youre in a bad mental state or if youre REALLY anxious as a person, but if youre mentally prepared, they WILL help you.
Befire i tried them, my friend said, "i feel like so many of the worlds problems would be resolved if everyone just tripped once." I thought it was stoner talk, but in retrospect i agree. :^)
i take lithium. some days im too dizzy and nauseous to lift. like today.
man I just fucking love so much lurking Veeky Forums and find these wonderful posts from time to time
really glad for you user, psychedelics really are the best medicine for the mind
For one thing you should consider not drinking anymore. It's probably making things worse for you.
LSD fixed me right up when I was a kid, had all sorts of issues, and they were there still but I learned how to deal with them.
Shame I don't have any friends anymore so I don't know where to get any.
just found out my bipolar and borderline friend raped and beat his ex gf, who was a distant friend of mine. i am sympathetic to mental illness but have 0 idea whether its ok to beat him to a bloody pulp.
>Borderline Personality Disorder,
how? are you a woman?
>I was such a wound-up asshole that I literally needed to eat toxic mushrooms and hallucinate for several hours at a time to loosen my butthole up enough to stop being a passive-aggressive prick all the time
Damn dude. Should've just started training with a squat plug.
>Hanging out with sex-criminals who beat women
That's like taking PCP, user. It just doesn't end well, and you significantly reduce your chances of being white trash by never doing it.
I have severe depression and social anxiety. I used to be self loathing but now I've pushed my anger towards others. I'm constantly raging at people who've screwed me over or taken advantage of me. It sucks cause at my job I have a lot of alone thinking time. I could start the day good but then the rage creeps in on me and by the end of my shift I'm ready to punch someone.
>I project myself in others in a cambodian dragon dildo aficionados forum
you look like the passive-aggressive prick to me tbqhwy familia
How do I not give a fuck about being watched at the gym? I feel like I'm limiting myself because I know what exercises to do to make progress , but I feel too anxious ! Theres so many buff bros and hot girls . Some of the girls can even lift more than me :'(. I'm 21 years 5'10 and weigh 155. I can only bench 85 lbs which is sad . It doesn't help that I signed up to the busiest gym in my area and I can only go during the busiest times (5-8pm) because of my job .
Tl;dr how to not give a fuck about exercising at the gym
Just do your thang bro. Most of them don't notice you anyways
It's not projecting when the traits like "hostile and anxious" and "didn't know how to accept people with faults" that make up a tightass prick are right there in the post as self-descriptions, fampai.
>I was recently diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder
I had a gf who was diagnosed with BPD. You have my sympathies, OP. It's a tough life.
still looking like a passive-aggressive prick and caring enough about it to keep replying famalama
i'm just fucking miserable
>at least i'm about to start making good money
>at least i'm trying to make things better
>at least life is worth fighting for
>at least she's worth fighting for
Shitposting is what I come here to do, user. Of course I'm going to keep doing it.
I got stuck in cocoon mode.
I look the best I've ever looked, I've been the most emotionally stable I've ever been, I've been reading and learning the most I've ever read or learnt but I also haven't made much progress socially. A few friends that I get together with every couple weeks but most of my days are just spent reading, lifting, thinking, etc. in my cocoon. Some weekends, I barely talk to anybody.
The worrisome part is that I could honestly stay in my cocoon for the foreseeable future. I don't really know a way out.
>Veeky Forumsbros with mental illnesses, how do you deal?
I don't. I just fantasize about killing myself or violence to try and sate myself. Oscillating between walking into the woods to die quietly versus blowing my head off with a shotgun where people will be sprayed with my hot blood and viscera.
I feel concentrated hatred, jealousy, sadness, remorse, regret, hopeless, alone. The whole spectrum and everything in between.
I feel happy very seldom, and it's usually fleeting.
More often than not the best state is just "distracted" from pain.
There are moments when I want nothing more than to just summon every ounce of strength I have ever worked for to put it towards the sole purpose of mangling someone beautiful. Not killing them - just disfiguring and crippling them. I hate them. I hate beautiful people so much. More than any text will allow me to express. The fact they did nothing for it, worked not a day, did not a single thing besides being born - and the fact there is nothing I can do to ever become that. No amount of work, no amount of effort, no matter how disciplined or rigorous will ever do it.
I can work in the gym. I can become stronger and improve my strength and physical fitness with dedication.
But I will never be beautiful. I will never be desired. I will never have some "aesthetic" that people look at and enjoy. And every day that passes that I get older, that only becomes more certain.
I seethe and writhe trying to keep this hidden. Keep myself calm. Can't let it show, right? Can't let people see this - they'd be more repulsed than they already are.
It's inevitable. They're just being what they were born to be, right?
One day I will become what I was born to be as well. And it won't be beautiful.
This. This is me. Being around people kind of sucks.
>But I will never be beautiful. I will never be desired. I will never have some "aesthetic" that people look at and enjoy.
Midgets and literal 2/10s can find someone on their level, don't take it too hard. There's someone out there for you if you take the time to look.
Also, have you read Temple of the Golden Pavillion? You sound a lot like the main character, a hideous monk with club-foot who burns down this magnificent golden temple because its beauty mocked him day in and day out.
Tbh in other people's minds ur not that important. When I see someone lifting small weights I don't even think twice about it. I, along with other people, have our own lives to focus on not some random person benching 85 lbs. So in reality no one cares but you and you shouldn't
k bro keep the banters funny tho you look too mad
For real though you need this book
libgen.io
Baby steps Mizoguchi
my ex had borderline
its pretty awful to deal with.
sorry bro
This
Dated a girl with BPD
Was the roughest year of my fucking life, I couldn't even imagine how shitty it is to live with it. She's doing better now though thankfully.
>book
I'll look into it.
Wish I could dispel myself of this notion I want to be something I cannot become. So foolish, but the pain is very real. The jealousy IS VERY REAL. I fantasize about just waylaying beautiful people when I pass them on the street, or just walking into a room full of models with a baseball bat.
They didn't do anything for that. They were born that way. They spend 30 minutes putting on makeup and pouting their lips, parting their hair.
I spend countless hours - day after day after day after day for years after year after year, stressing my body to the limit, risking serious permanent injury, choking down all manner of chemicals and stuffing myself with food I don't want to eat just in the fleeting attempt to get stronger. Sweating in disgusting dungeon gyms that smell like a fucking urinal that are burning hot or freezing cold depending on the time of year.
They wake up, take a picture of themselves, post it on the internet, and people GIVE THEM MONEY FOR THE SOLE REASON THAT THEY WERE BORN BEAUTIFUL.
No
nonononono lol
No
This world. Fucking beyond me. This stupid species. Or god - if there is one - is laughing at me. For being powerless and writhing in such a futile manner like this.
I will read the book. I doubt it will salve this.
>I have borderline personality disorder
fuck you
When I'm at the gym I am only focused on one thing: my own lifts. Most of the people there are similarly focused.
Even if I'm looking at you or in your general direction, I don't exactly "see" you nor am I watching you. I'm spacing out or thinking about my previous set or psyching myself up for the next set.
Source on that gif?
I don't. I have a God complex and lifting complements it well bc lifting will make me look like a Greek God anyways
Sounds like bipolar depression, i.e. manic depression. Episodes of mania, high mood swing, and subsequent episodes of depression, low mood swings. Talk to a psychiatrist about medication that will lower the amplitude of your mood swings. Also, work hard at the times you are feeling well and use that time to get the sucky things in your life done. Then, when you are feeling low, force yourself to perform an activity to distract your thoughts until you feel better again. I'd suggest picking an interest and joining a club. Maybe it's wood sculpting or shooting or whatever. Pick something that is mentally distracting and places you in the company of people that will talk to you about said interest.
This is just my opinion for those of you in the thread that might have manic depressive disorder. Even if it is mild. Good luck!!