ITT: We are all in the same gym

i see thousands of dyels gathering around the squat rack talking about form

meanwhile i curl

>break bench press PR 1pl8 while listening to 10-hour anime youtube video

feels good man

>suck everyone's cock
>swallow their cum
>n-no homo

>benchpresses 1pl8
>unable to do my last rep
>bar is at my throat, almost choking

>sound lunk alarm
>await SWAT team to have you removed

> Proceed to bench press

> load 2.5kg plate right
> load 2.5kg plate left
> load 2.5kg plate left
> load 5kg plate left
> load 2.5kg plate right
> load 2.5kg plate left
> load 2.5kg plate left
> load 5kg plate right
> load 2.5kg plate right
> load 2.5kg plate left
> load 2.5kg plate right
> load 2.5kg plate left
> load 2.5kg plate right
> out of 2.5kg plates so I attach my bag to right. My bag has a 2ltr bottle of non-diet soda and a book 'How to loose weight in 10 simple steps' that I got from Amazon.

Do one rep and hit the showers.

>Tfw some faggot keeps playing 10 hour long anime videos without his headphones in while i'm trying to lift

>rush over to spot you while dragging my balls over your mouth

kekked m8

>wear basketball shorts
>go in the gym

>*Drinks water between sets*

...

>be the only black guy
>dyel as fuck
>every other dyel asks me to spot them with a 185 bench
>I'm too friendly to say no
>another black user walks in
>we make eye contact and nod at each other

It's just like my regular gym

that's an interesting bar path. i've failed dozens of times and it always lands below my nipple lines even if i fail the lockout.

>is the sqaut rack being used?
>no?

proceed to squat my own weight
>wakes up at the hospital

>chokes even more in balls

>Stare like a weirdo at the dude in the squat rack because I'm too scared to ask how many sets he has left

Mah nigga

> ji bun wo!!!!!

>set new pr on everything

I do this and will continue to do it.

>stack all the benches together for my calisthenics routine

Is there something wrong with this?

>do bench press
>left arm is a bit weaker
>lift 2 pl8s at right and 1 pl8 left

I stand two feet away from you and stare with the stupidest grin as you block a quarter of the dumbbell rack to do kipping shrugs with the 50s.

Hey guys
Look that asian kid over ther, do you wanna go and bash him?
>Not real bullying

Who wipes shit? That's what the stoolies in the matching, bright tee shirts are paid to do.

Set down ten matts in corner, make sign out of human skin. "BASICS WITH user." Start curling while waiting for other anons

>be pajeet
>poo in the squatrack while squatting

Kek

> Proceed to weight rack

> Drag Sit-up bench over
> Drag regular bench over
> Get 10kg and 20kg weights set up next to regular bench
> Take bar from squat box and set it up in one of the floor based row holders with a 20kg plate from the leg machine
> put yoga mat in the middle
> take 20kg kettlebell from yoga studio and set it down
> move everything so that it's a circle around the weight rack
> take a picture of the ensemble, title it 'This is today's routine. Get. Strong.' Tag myself in the image and check in on facebook to 'gains town'
> Spend 20 mins finding the right track on my Zune

Do 5 pressups on the yoga mat and hit the showers

Dammit, Pajeet.

You know guys I'm just happy to be here, my last gym only had 2 bench presses!

Do you honestly drink water between sets unironically? Holy fuck.

Yes, I do. Now tell me why I shouldn't, unless this is a meme.

is that a meme?

i drink water as well between sets, whats the big deal?

>taking the obvious bait

Should I also tell you why you shouldn't stare at the sun? Why you shouldn't run into traffic? Fuck man are you children?

*Be fat old man*
>Walk into gym
>Pick up 2 2.5kg weights
>Spin them around for 10 mins
>Hit the showers for 30 mins
>Stand around in the changing rooms naked

Ey, how many sets you got left? My arm day is nearly finished and I need the rack for some curls.

>Crop dusts in between sets

>Eats a pot noodle in between sets

...

>proceed to rep out some atg highbar skwats with 4 plates for an hour or two, then get on the bench press, do two sets with 225 then leave

And afterwards let's gangbang the qt receptionist

Thanks for contributing

>refer to everyone as "faggot"
>walk around naked because we're all so secure with out masculinity we know it's no gay
>touch everyone's cock and joke about their respective sizes
>jerk off a dude who's benching to fuck with his set just for the lulz
>suck off the brosplit curlers as a punishment for their lack of knowledge about weightlifting
>touch cocks with others in the shower to further solidify the fact that we're so straight this isn't even gay
>go home and fantasize about the day because I'm proud of how straight I am

>i take off my pants to take a pic of my quads

Be qt receptionist
>"Hey it's you again"
>"You workout a lot!"
>"Try not to leave too many heavy weights out, I can't put them all away"

Those boots... great for lifting in

>75% of the people there are fat and don't exercise, don't meet the 1/2/3/4 standards, likely they superset and blame genetics, or don't even lift freeweights
>10% of the people there are skellies or skinnyfats and literally never, ever did any sports during school, and can't OHP the bar, blame genetics
>10% are fatasses with intermediate lifts
>3% are lean and have intermediate lifts
>1% are fat and have heavy lifts
>1% are lean and have heavy lifts

>walk in
>immediately look at feet and go about doing routine
>profusely apologise and stutter whenever I accidentally run into someone or am in the way
>feel the eyes of everyone on me
>finish up and leave
>tfw 6'4" lanklette

Yeah, sounds like ancient greek

That's an average gym

Dude It's comfy af

Nah, Veeky Forums surprisingly has more dyel 'can't bench the bar' skellies than most gyms, and most gyms have more than 75% useless fatasses

>Unplug your aux cord as you are a filthy casual and no nothing.
>Plug my phone in and start streaming r/a/dio.
>Wipe the sweat of my head from the intensity of phone plug in x f

>walk in
...
>SOON I'LL BE 60 YEARS OLD

>milk, rice, chicken and broccoli prices in the store around the corner rise so quickly the world economy receives a shock it will not recover from

>He hasn't heard people talking shit about his developed torso and hidden legs while wearing basketball shorts yet

You'd be surprised how many people seem to think your bones = quads.

What's wrong with that? I wear swimming shorts, very confy.

>Snip the aux cord and tell everyone to wear headphones or else
>March to my squat rack and say 5 minutes to the person in my rack
>Furiously repeat myself when the autist asks what I mean, say he'd better be done in 5 minutes or I'm throwing a 45 his way, this is my rack, and I come here this time every day, and I know the owner.
>Squat a world record

>use my back up cord to put on anons anime music

Devilish

>walk in
>mutter "h-hello" to the qt azn clerk
>wander around the room waiting for people to get off my machines because i'm too awkward to ask to work in
>mentally tell myself not to drink water every set
>finish my workout and avoid the showers completely

Who lifts in Iron Rangers?

>back day
>see asian dyel faggot benching 135
>immideat target
>hes struggling last rep
>say to Big P "watch this"
>offer "help" to dyel asian
>graciously thanks me when im touching the bar
>thinks im gonna start helping when bar starts to go down
>start pushing bar down
>can see big P with a grin on his face in the corner of my eye
>asian guy in panic mode starts vigorously screaming help
>2 cardio bunnies walk buy just winking an eye to me
>asian passes put lmao
>go to manager and say "theres some homless asian sleeping on the bench press"
>manager is old school weightlifter
>gets furious, runs to the bench red as fuck
>slaps asian kid with backhand
>asian dyel wakes up confused "where am i?"
>manager goes of "your in my fucking gym im gonna teach you some fucking manners"
>manager drags asian dyel out back door to an ally
>hear screaming for 5 mins
>manager comes back, smells slightly like shit
>"thanks i needed that"
>mfw gives me and big P free protein shakes

>smells slightly like shit
holy fuck kek

>All the benches are taken
>Squat rack occupied
>Weights everywhere
>Someone keeps chanting grow grow grow while stretching by the pilates balls as I walk by
>Get anxious as fuck
>Sit on stairs and wait for something to come free

T H I C K

Apart from the racks nearest to the showers, where you can hear the constant whispers of the anal penetration happening behind the walls. Or, on second thought, that may be the most contested for rack.

Also, /plg/ will take over a corner of the gym and not mingle with anyone else.

>enter gym
>slink over to squat rank
>stand there waiting
>let people work in with me
>sniff their straight man poo while they toot and poot

>trappychan walks in

>y-you too...

>Be dyel trying to improve myself
>Bench is weak, but at least I'm trying
>Discover that saying self hating things under my breath encourages me to lift more
>Accidentally scream FAGGOT
>Everyone looks at me and laughs
>Gotta change gyms now

Why are people here 's obsessed with Zoe? She used to be qt but that tattoo is fucking disgusting

Also

>proceed to do the workout I am familiar with
>routine I could do at home
>avoid social interaction
>keep out of the homoerotic showers in fear of losing my last shred of heterosexuality

You wouldn't wait long, >Wait 10 minutes max, nobody else wants the squat rack
>Beat some cunt to the rack who decides he wants to do shrugs, tell him he can shrug looking in another mirror
>Gym owner kicks out some dyel faggot doing squats, deads, ohp and accessories in the squat rack for 1 hour + without leaving

It is a meme yes

*takes a nap on the bench*

Do this, climb to the top and declare myself king of the gym

I have before and will absolutely throw your towel out of the way.

*wakes up*
*does light sets of tri-pulldowns whilst yawing*

>load 6.5pl8
>deadlift with perfect form
>high five boardshorts
>slap trappy's ass
>hug isley

Thanks guys for letting me know what type of people I frequent this board with , holy shit you're all autistic.

*Soe
In the past week I've only seen her posted one other time... and that was me as well. So it might just be me obsessed with her

>this

Anywhere lewd pictures of trappy? I-I need it for reasons. No homo.
no u

Man I would fuck trappy in a heartbeat. Gets me all sorts of worked up

imgur.com/a/SKR7F
I think this should be included in sticky

Aw, bae

Hot damn, that's quality boipucci rite dere... thanx bro.

Jesus. And here's me thinking I'm straight.

Honestly though mods need to word filter and ban all instances of the b word here

>grab boardshorts
>SQUASH HIS HEAD LIKE A GRAPE