Hey son you're getting pretty big

>getting

>y-you too

But I'm your wife's son.

Yeah bitch, getting. If you were already big, you would have been the one sleeping with your mom instead of Black Dad Man with his fucking juicy forearms of peace.

Wait you morons he's opening his front door
Why would his son be outside?

>front door
>AC and light switches

>Hey user I saw you running the other day, your whole body was flopping. Have you ever tried doing push-ups or something? Why don't you go to a gym?

This is my dad...

>tfw barely have a dad

>peephole on door

Yeah, what kind of idiot would put light switches and controls to the house at a convenient location when you enter?

Did you faggots ever think that the son doesn't live at home anymore and he's coming to visit his dad and the first thing the dad notices when opening the front door is how big his son is getting.

FOR YOU

>image.jpg

Thanks daddy

>tfw gf calls her actual dad "daddy" and there's pretty much no chance she'll ever call you daddy because it'll make her think of her dad
>tfw girls calling you daddy is the secret key to your instaboners and your gf will forever be second rate because she won't be able to compare to a random girl calling you daddy
>now you're stuck fighting off sluts who call you daddy so you can stay faithful to a girl that won't call you daddy

WHY

My ex started calling me papi as joke one time. Shes white. Then she started doing it with fuck me eyes. Then she started calling me that when i was slammin it. Mixed feels about it.

Your a big guy dad

>AYY PAPI AYY PAPI SI SI SI

>he can't afford an iPhone

>papi
I don't think I could take this seriously.
Had a girl call me daddy and master before, was ok.

Had a girl say "you are a god" while I was fucking her. It was weird...

Kek, i had a redheaded white girl from tennesee start trained with shit like this. I only called her Mami when i made her cum for 6 months straight, then when ever i wanted her wet i would call her mami and her body would just do it and i could fuck her whenever.
She got into calling me papi and had a thick southern bell accent too.
I kinda miss her sometimes tbqh famalam.

You've never had sex

For some reason all the girls I fuck think my name is "Who are you, why are you doing this? Help!"

Weird me too

Maybe we look alike

youtube.com/watch?v=NXhmh4MhuuM

Thanks daddy, come in here for a sec.

Just ease her into it you dumb fag. Joke -> Test waters -> Real.

Doesn't matter if she calls her real dad that too. Half those other girls do too.

You can't post this and not provide el sauco.

No dad I'm not doing steroids...oh wait that's not what you said, t-thanks

>gf's dad used to hit her and her mother
Absolutely not happening unless I want tears.

he came to visit, duh. that's why dad's surprised - he hasn't seen him in a while.

You are still living with your parents, aren't you?

Thank you Mr. Carson

only acceptable answer

How did you have a pale ass kid like me dadnigga?

Sauce now faggot

For you

Everyone in this thread is cancerous summer.
except you

Hey dad, you are getting pretty nigger.

For the last time son, call me "Dad".

How did you get into my apartment old man?

Thanks daddy, totally natural

>Stop looking at my cock

Or

>who are u?
>plz stop calling me son!

Don't call me son again, mom's cuck.

Thank you mr. kang

No problem Kodos

For you.

Dad, I...

Topfuckinglel.

f-for you too

But it is an iPhone.
Here, have a picture of my cat from my phone that will have "image.jpg"

>People that call me son
Fuck off your not my dad I've never met him and I never will.

>tfw barely know father

>image.jpg

>tfw you will never have dad forearms

nice cat bro