Depressed brah

Sup fit depressed brah here. Made some posts a few weeks back.
I won't claim im severely depressed cause I'm not taking meds and can enjoy life to some degree.

Quick recap:
>be lil nerd
>want to bang sloots more than anything in life
>lift for 2+years, good grades, good friends and life in General
> look good, get tinder, lets go

Meet slut, can't get hard, she says stuff like
'Other guys dont have that issue'
Eventually give up, go to bed, random boner, fuck.
Her:'FINALLLY'
Felt really bad about myself afterwards. Like i didn't deliver.

Keep dating her for solid 7 months while she says stuff like
'As long as you satisfy me I won't cheat on you'

Soon my brain went into overdrive constantly worring whether I will get hard the next time I see her to be 'a man like others'
My moods&grades went down, stress levels increased Week by Week. February my eye started twitching and sleep problems occured.

When I finally broke up in May my stress levels peaked. I couldn't get hard even to porn.
So what have I been doing since then:

>CBT Therapy
>sports&sun
>Meditation
>Diet
>natural pills
>familiy&friends

Can't really say if it worked so far cause I feel like crying this very Moment. I have convinced myself that there is something wrong with me and that I will never have sex again, logically never have a GF or familiy.
Confidence is 0.

My thoughts are 50% hatred towards that slut, 40% self pity cause I would give anything to have my old life back and 10% anxiety.
Today i woke up at 6:20 and had literally outbursts of anger.

Has anyone some warm words or advise?
If not let my story be a warning for you guys. I didn't know how happy I was until I lost it. If you are happy you gotta protect it. Life is beautiful.

Bump

Bumpump

Dumpbump

Try to breathe when it starts to get bad for you. Find a professional to help.
Try to find a positive in your day, also check out superbetter. Might help.

However I'm the worst person to help with this sort of thing.

Don't worry brah

I don't get why she's a slut. Did she cheat on you?

Relax brah. You will get over, in life or death. Nothing lasts forever.

Age 18, 15 guys under her belt.
Also didn't lose any occasion to tell me literally
'I was a huge slut'

>dating for 7 months a grill who said "'Other guys dont have that issue' " and 'As long as you satisfy me I won't cheat on you'
stupid retard, you caused all your trouble yourself. the cure? find a better grill, or just keep doing your shit and they will work eventually

You should seek some psychiatrists.

just seek help man
you dont know what true helpless despair is so please dont wait till you get to that level

Find a good shrink and work out the reason you felt the need to piss away your precious time with such a low quality useless whore.

ok, I'll help. Clearly, this is the hottest girl you have been with. Clearly she is a self centered princess. You jumped from shit tier/ low tier girls to a high maintenance bitch and you got fucking burnt out trying to tread water in that rapids. I'm guessing shes fairly young and she is "peaking" on the curve of her life: she will never look better than she is right now.

DESU you should have cheated on her and left saying you found a girl that can actually make your dick hard: put that shit on her and don't let her fuck up your rep. I could easily say you should have fucked her and moved on but you needed this experience...this pain, to learn from.

He's just starting to equate feelings of inadequacy towards women in general because of her. Don't blame all women for the stupidity of one slut. Learn to recognize sluts for what they are and don't gf/wife them.

PS: you have porn addiction and its whats fucking your dick up. for real, only jerk off once a week (or cum from actual pussy anytime)...you'll be fine in a month. The rest is in your head, find a girl that isnt a slut who taps her foot waiting for dick.

buy some cialis you fucking moron

Guys I'm doing therapy.
First session: talking about my issues
Second session: he let me go back in time when I felt this 'im different feeling' for the first time
Third: He let me think through what really would be the worst case, and took some pressure of me
4th: He discussed with me that I am there cause I first demand alot of myself and never really took care of my feelings.

Oh yes by far the hottest. And by far the worst Person I ever met.
And maybe I should have done that, but was to inexperienced. I was also the first guy to date her, she did really love me so at least I broke her heart.

I'm lucky that my 6/10 qt. wants me back.
She was always good to me and maybe I will go for it.
Sadly she is anorexic and has some pretty serious issues with her belly.

Drugs dont work when the brain is fucked up mate.

I've been down that road mate. You need to adapt a better philosophy in life. Life gets better when it just aint about bitches, that's the largest pill I had to swallow.

idk mayne, 15 doesnt sound bad. fucked a chick(age 25) last month that has slept with 100+ dudes, still tight. wrapped it of course

then why go back lol. just fuck more tinder bitches

That's what I try to understand.
Then tell me: what is life about? Currently Im lost and looking for a new purpose.
A book?

Seriously, why? It made me only unhappy.

This qt. loves me more than life. I know she will be by my sie no matter how Bad things get. This alone takes a ton of pressure of me.

Plus I share my best memories with her.

I asked why you thought she was a slut cus I used to date a chick who didn't party or go out really at all for about a year and I got pretty attached. That alone made me think she was a good girl. She he ended up fucking some other dude and I broke it off. Felt like shit for a few weeks, but that kind of shit makes you see sloots for what they really are, as the other user said. I really do now believe that good girls are 1/1000.

Just focus on yourself. getting big, getting good grades, making money etc. Fuck sloots when you feel like it on the side and just enjoy life. It's really not worth worrying about this kind of shit and when you do stop letting it bother you, you will be much happier.

Join the military or get a hobby. Worked wonders for me

I actually have to most faithful/good girl at hand.
I really Start to believe you. One need to focus on other stuff.

im not poking fun but how old are you?

the way you described her sounds like she has severe emotional problems(anorexia) and what kind of belly issue(like pic related?) you should focus on education in all honesty. have you been to a top tier university or state college? the amount of higher tier puss you would be getting can be an eye opener.

you're just getting over the breakup. that is all normal shit.

focus on yourself & on lifting & staying disciplined, focus on dating other women, focus on not jerking off so much, focus on getting a social life or hobbies

>media keeps telling us the negros are starving
>every fucking negro is fat as fatass

i know right!

We are both 22. She has no emotional issues with herself but with food or something. Still she has been the best Person in my life.

And dont you understand? All that pussy doesn't mean shit if I can't fuck it. At least currently I need like a 2min blowjob to even get hard.
I want to calm down, you dont know how tense I feel every day.
I want to enjoy games or sports without running thoughts in my mind which hasnt been the case for several months.
I need to regain control over my life

Watch the documentary Harmontown, just a shot in the dark but I identify well with the writer Dan Harmon apparently.
It's basically about him being a drunk asshole touring around just wanting to make others happy, it's nice because he meets all these nerds/asspies and just feels love toward them.

Don't ask what life is about on Veeky Forums man, you're not going to get a good answer.
There doesn't need to be an end goal or anything to life, enjoy yourself and find a passion faggot.

what makes you tense?

After 7 months of constant stress it makes sense that the body needs time to heal.
I'm gonna do a blood test tomorrow and wanna do a Salvia test soon after. I want to help my body as good as possbile.

I genererally got more anxious about everything.

you got a therapist? shit helps

Did you even read my posts?
Yes I do, this Week will be the 5th session

nah i skimmed through that shit

reddit . com/r/theredpill

now fuck off

>born to an abusive bully dad and a bipolar mom who is zombified from a lifetime of antidepressants
>bullied from the age of 4 or 5 onwards, shouted and screamed at about not tidying my room or brushing my teeth, my father would bang things loudly, grind his teeth and get up in my face as if he was about to hit me. never did though, the threat was enough. I thought he wanted to kill me when I was younger. I still get a sinking feeling in my stomach when I hear him coming up the stairs
>no friends in school or growing up, always the quiet weird one, spend everyday in the bathroom cubicle alone
>start to really hate people, like school shooter- tier hate people
>around 12-13 start having sleep problems, takes me hours to sleep, always restless sleep, regular nightmares
>spent my days in a mental fog, felt like I wasn't really "there" any more, started to dissociate from what was going on around me. I believe it's called depersonalisation and it's a coping mechanism to deal with abuse
>start therapy at 13, start medication at 15
>spend my days either alone in school or at home being bullied to study by my father, sometimes it gets too much and I lock myself in my room and punch myself i the head until I go unconcious
>have an existential crisis at 16, realise everything is pointless and I should either kill myself or take all of the material things that this world can give me, get as much money and power as I can. I don't know why these were the two options I gave myself
>feel dead inside all of the time now, still see no point in anything, work on auto-pilot, obsess over work and self improvement, try to brainwash myself with motivational videos any time the depression kicks in
>I'd imagine I'm what you would describe as a sociopath, feel no empathy or compassion for anyone, have no emotional connections with anyone, can't understand the motivations or intentions of other people. have no emotions, have to regularly practice my facial expressions in the mirror