Tells humans they shall eat the herbs they'll grow from the ground

Nothing of such is said. It literally says "Cain offered veggies, Abel murdered the firstborn of a sheep, and God was more pleased with the blood." "So Cain took Abel to a walk, two men went in, one came out."

Basically Cain refused to be a good goy and prostrate himself before every God's demand, so God fucked him over.

Abel: hark, Lord, unto thee I offer my best lamb.

Cain: yo 'sup God, here's some beans and shit.

I don't blame Big Daddy. I'd be pissed too.

He literally does his best to please God, but the sheepfucker was favored.

Abel didn't do shit for the lamb to be the best, he just let it roam a while while he fucked other sheeps, and chose one of the many as offering. Cain literally worked his ass off to get the food grown and also selected the best he had, but guess what, labor doesn't mean shit in the eyes of God, only blood.

Moral of the story is that God is a complete faggot and you shouldn't worship him just because he created you. This is something that I never understood about Abrahamic religions. In Greek or Egyptian religion gods were obviously more powerful than humans, and humans were required to sacrifice to them, but at the same time they knew gods are fucking assholes and not some moral paragons. Whereas in Judaism everything God does is just and righteous just because he's God and if humans complain, they "just don't get it" (see Job).

The creator of the universe is not a soyboy, deal with it

>I know better than the creator of everything
>I am totally rational guys
No you are an arrogant retard

>I created a child so it's completely moral if I rape and beat said child because I'm the CREATOR
Creator worship is one of the most cuckolded axioms imaginable.

You don't create a child, you get one

>Yahwecuck with more shilling for his master

>You have to realize this is a story altered by the telephone effect of thousands of years. It seems incredulous but tribes in Siberia still tell a legend of the hunter in the sky chasing the deer across the stars. The amazing thing is that the constellations they describe were visible in that area only up to 22000-24000 years BC. That's the memory of oral cultures for you.

This is really fascinating, do you have a source to read more about this?

The way I was taught about the story is that that point of view (i.e. considering the validity of God's judgement rather than Cain's conduct) is at the root of Cain's sin. God's judgement on the offerings is not really the focus, and in any case in context God is objectively right about everything, that's not under discussion either.

The story works even outside a religious context. If others are doing something and it works, while you are doing something else and it doesn't work, you should be looking at yourself and trying to improve your ways (which is exactly the lecture God gives in 4:6-7), not attacking the people who succeed (which is what Cain does).

Tell me how you decide what child you get?

The god of bible mythology loved suffering, bloodshed and the savory smell of burning flesh. Salad? Lulz.

ALRIGHT MORONS LISTEN UP
Cain's sacrifice was not favored because the practice of sacrifice had already been established by God in Eden, after the fall. If you recall, Adam and Eve tried to hide their nakedness with fig leaves. God instead "gave them skins" to wear. This meant death, blood. Animals were killed to "cover" their shame - it was a sacrifice that symbolized how the shedding of blood would cover sin. This is seen later at the Passover with the killing of a lamb, and symbolized by Christ's sacrifice for sin. Thus, Abel was faithfully following the true method of sacrifice instituted by God for his time - Cain was not doing this, but rather offering some random scraps of bloodless vegetation.

It's not a transition of a people from the fucking neolithic, it's about a conflict between settled farmers (Cain) and nomadic pastoralists (Abel). They are "brothers" so they're likely of the same (Canaanite) ethnicity, and the herders are depicted as the righteous ones favored by God - Hebrews, who by now have a distinct identity.
This is a major Old Testament theme. Abraham was also a wealthy nomadic herder and in his stories, settled urban people are depicted as wicked, degenerate filth - Sodom and Gomorrah - and God punishes them for their wickedness while blessing Abraham. There's a similar narrative when Moses runs away from very oppresive and very urban Egypt, to the sparsely populated lands of Midian and becomes a shepherd. Shortly after that, God shows up and designates him as a savior of the Hebrews from the Egyptians who are about to feel God's wrath.

The Christian and Jewish perspective (Muslim theology kind of rejected this but that's a separate topic) is an ascended pantheism.

Maybe it will make more sense to some people if you (partly) transfer this from the field of personal morality and ethics to impersonal physics and engineering. Say you and your brother both design very complex devices (e.g. space craft) but you use the Newtonian model while your brother uses the relativistic model. You both work very hard to the best of your ability. Your brother's design works while your craft crashes and burns.

Is the correct reaction to:

a) Review the causes of your failure and improve your design
b) Get mad at physics
c) Get mad at your brother

Well, Cain does b) and c), and apparently many modern people would agree with his approach. After all, they both worked as hard! Hell, maybe Cain worked harder! But the point is what's right and wrong isn't under discussion, deciding or changing that is beyond human ability, you just have to deal with it.

"Law of physics" doesn't have any conscience or agency. God does.

God bless thee!

So you saying that if the scenario is exactly as I have presented it except the laws of physics have been set at the creation of the world by a conscious agent, THEN the correct reaction is to get mad at said agent and your brother?

Your analogy is utter shit. A more apt analogy would be something like videogame players criticizing the game developer - a sentient entity that consciously designed the environment and the rules.

It's because cain laboured over his crops and was offering god his labour, the bible teaches (mainly though Jesus) that God doesn't want your labour, we weren't created to labour, that your labour is meaningless

>Your analogy is utter shit.

Point out a flaw in it.

>A more apt analogy would be something like videogame players criticizing the game developer - a sentient entity that consciously designed the environment and the rules.

Now THAT'S a shit analogy, considering it's focused on things external to a self-contained world. The 'players' are part of the world, also made by the developer, and they have no point of comparison (e.g. other video games to compare their world with).

Ah. Your explanation makes more sense. My intuition, though, says that it recycled earlier stories back to the beginning of the transition period for the fertile crescent. It was a sort of apocalypse where the average guy got fucked and chucked on an almost unbelievable basis. Emphasis on the transitioning period. After an apocalypse, the only way things can go is up. Well hopefully. But by the time of Abraham, you would have the settler /nomad dynamic being far more pertinent than H&G versus farmer and city

Can't find the site I got that from (it was a single person site dedicated to the paleo history of Siberia and dedicated to extant tribes in that region.

But I did find this. Only skimmed but it looks like support.
google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://www.northern-stars.com/Native_American_Sky_Legends.pdf&ved=0ahUKEwjjjfvDjfPXAhUJ3WMKHcsPDuUQFghkMA4&usg=AOvVaw2M6tCBsSQSIuTKa6A-JpA6

You mean the demiurge, right?

>vegetables are mostly water, animals are mostly meat and fat
>durr why won't my offering burn better? guess I should kill my brother

>all these people forgetting that even after God refused Cain's sacrifice, he consoled him, and Cain still murdered his brother

>But then the priest caste worries and makes God punish those who hurt the farmers 7x over.
the curse of the mark of cain was for someone who killed him, not cain

I know. Cain was a farmer. They don't want pre-Bronze Age horse riders to fuck up the farmers. Thus the mark of Cain. A bit of impotent magic that was supposed to be enforced by God.

A bit of impotent magic, turned into a fantastical story where God enforces it, not the priests.*

But user, rational skeptics(TM) don't need to do that. All they need to do is ignore that like the good sheep that they are

Getting murdered was Abel's punishment for not asking yahweh for compassion for his own brother. He should have said something like "well god, surely you can also enjoy my brother's sacrifice, I saw him working as hard as me". But no, he just stood there and said nothing and allowed his brother to be humiliated. Yahweh punished him for that and then punished the executioner of the punishment in true Yahweh fashion.

god is like a crazy fiancee who gets mad you didnt spend 3 months salary on an engagement ring

soma is in the rg veda, long predates buddha