Post the worst, shoddiest, most inaccurate historical reproductions you can find

>Notice the detail

>that Kirk Douglas physique

I thought this was going to kink back to:

*Link. But it works anyway.

>when you're trying to look at Chinese armor and literally the only non-bullshit source is the Great Ming Military blog and they don't have a lot of pretty pictures to stare at
I am so mildly upset you have no idea.

>THE CHAD STRIDE

Doesn't help that Chinese costume makers love to make pseudo Japanese or fantasy armors.

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the problem is actual Chinese armors were rarely very aesthetic

Lmao this nigga look like an enemy from Elder Scrolls 1

>Greathelm
>plate armor
Why do they do this. It doesn't even look right

kek

I'm not even sure what this is supposed to be. It looks like a child's Halloween costume.

*blocks your path*

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haha oh wow

well yeah, it's something he literally made up himself

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Very rare helmet of the SS Pirate Fireman division

How can anyone watch this drivel.

This is gold

Me on the right

jesus christ, who tought this looked acceptable, I feel bad for the actors

Lindyception

nothing wrong with this besides the amateurish construction

What bothers me the most is that they make most of the costumes from scratch yet choose to go full D&D when it wouldnt cost a nickel more to atleast try to be historically correct.

It looks sort of similar to this World War 1 armor piece I saw at a museum

Behold, the retarded cousin of Lawbringer from For Honor.

Yeah! like, any reenactor can sew a viking costume for under 250£

at least we got a good parody show out of it.
From norway even.

when he was just a larping teenager
>inb4 now he's larping 40something(?)

Gottem

Here in Strasbourg this is for sale in a shop in front of the cathedral. Looks even worse irl

FUCK YOU BIGOT YASSSS VIKANG QUEEN SLAY

>the problem is actual Chinese armors were rarely very aesthetic
Depends if you like lamellar/scale armors.

Isn't that from his video about Indian maille?

What I hate about Vikings is that the actual armours Vikings and Britons used at the time look infinitely cooler than whatever their designers make up.

Fucking THIS

What I don't understand about this one is how popular it is.
Seriously, like every hoplite reenactor buys this shit

Silly goyim this is a TV show about the DARK AGES™ so that means no colors or shiny things allowed. Only browns, greys and leather are acceptable for the DARK AGE™ aesthetic because we don't want you goyim to forget that these people were filthy barbarians.

bonanza.com/items/like/145500453/Fully-Wearable-Gothic-Knight-Suit-of-Armor-15th-Century-Reenactment-Costume-sca

This page has some pretty terrible shit at high prices if anyone is interested

Why are the arms so fucking long

Pretty much anything sold by Nauticalmart or Indiamart is pure junk.
They've started using images of other armourer's works or museum photos and slapped their watermarks on them because they know their stuff looks like shit.

>the problem is actual Chinese armors were rarely very aesthetic
Not really. The general's/elite trooper's armor from the 900s-1300s China is pretty aesthetic.

It was the East Asian version of Greco-Roman Armor. You have Japanese gods dressed in this shit.

Most Chinese directors are either just lazy or focused on spectacle.

pls stab me in the throat

>Most Chinese directors are either just lazy or focused on spectacle.
Doesn't sound very different from in the west, really.

HELP

Tbf its very hard to replicate pre 19th century shit to the point of accuracy, but Chinese-lingo cinema is just freaking egregious. Take a look back at . That movie "An Empress and her Warriors" was set during the Warring States.

A time when most Chinese armor was made of leather, and looked like this. And this is for the generals and heavy troopers.

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Yea, people like Wassonartistry and Whiterosearmoury have had problems with this. I see their armour poping up places where they shoudn't be from time to time

THEY DIDN'T HAVE FLAT TOPS IN ANCIENT ROME!

>Tbf its very hard to replicate pre 19th century shit to the point of accuracy,
Honestly prior to the excavation of the Qin terracotta army or Chu charioteers the Chinese really had no idea what the leather armors of the Warring States looked like.

If you look at historical artwork Chinese artists use contemporary equipment similar to how Medieval European depicted Biblical saints.

At times they make some pretty decent costumes

My zongles get bongled everytime I see a rubber amour painted with metalic paint in a movie or show bend and shake like jelly. Saw this once on got and got triggered.

>opponent accidentally stabs one of those plates
>blade slips and you end up stabbed anyways
CAN'T WIN!

ffs why do they pay some costume designer to shit out some amalgamation of leather world of warcraft bullshit when they could probably spend less money to just go on kultofathena or something and get a few chain shirts and helmets?

Would it be ok if it where an aventail plus great helm while wearing plate armor?

While I know a lot of people don't like it, I think the future of historical movies are going to be cgi, espesially now that we're getting much better at it. Then they have no excuse to dress them up as some motorcycle thugs anymore

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OwO whats this

it's kind of shitty but this is kind of the only way to freeze a the current state of ruins in place, probably too expensive to use shit loads of glass

>hands not even in the gauntlets
does he know what he's doing?

what pisses me off about this picture is that that specific type of helm is styled after an Anglo-Saxon BURIAL mask

>SOME
>BODY
>ONCE
>TOLD ME

apparently the Burgonet helmets were just what they had laying around in the studio warehouse and they concluded 99% of their audience wouldn't care and just filming the series with them would be more productive than looking for accurate helmets.

that one viking show on the history channel where the anglo saxons were wearing 15th century helmets

kek who made those aliens

> Vikings

Don't forget the Papal Guard...because the Pope is in Rome, you know.

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The Vikings™ will never get past our stout fortifications and powerful catapults!

>Take a look back at (You). That movie "An Empress and her Warriors" was set during the Warring States.

The movie was set in the Nanbeichao period. Their armor would look something like this.

Don't forget the rifle tier crossbows.

Haha, BTFO by our deadly rapid-fire crossbows again!

No it's about some armour he made as a teenager/20 something for larping iirc

That isnt Anglo-saxon user, it is from valsgarde in sweden, you are probably thinking of the sutton hoo helmet

I didn't know Knuckles wore armor.

yeah that's what came to mind. it's just that I know a lot about Anglo-Saxon culture and absolutely nothing of Swedish culture

Bascinet helmet (with or without visor) plus aventail would be better imo

my first thought on viewing the OP

Bascinets are from a little before full plate like that was a thing, Armets and other fully articulated helmets are more fitting.

I hate, HATE, this shit in particular

wtf am I looking at

All of my wat

what video game is this?

I think the author misinterpreted the statue/mural he based his cataphract on.

The Chinese never used riveted lamellar but they did have riveted leather laminar.

I was under the impression simole bascinets continued to be used as armor for footmen and common soldiers through the 14th and 15th centuries. But yeah I guess if we're talking late full plate a fully articulated full enclosed helmet would be better. (Still, even nobles often ditched such helms for simple kettle hats for more visibility.) I guess aventail are kind of passe by the time you have armets etc.

I've always wondered, though, wouldn't rigid chin/throat pieces severely restrict the ability to turn your head?

I'm this guy What exactly is wrong with the Sutton Hoo helmet? More ceremonial than practical, like the Celtic horned helmets?

Knight Errant is a pretty great YouTube channel on medieval European armor. I just found him recently but he really goes into the details of different helmet setups, etc.
youtube.com/user/neosonic66

>wouldn't rigid chin/throat pieces severely restrict the ability to turn your head?

that's pretty much why Armets and articulated helmets in general came to be. Hound skull bascinets