>at the supermarket
>qt cashier
>still in line
>eventually it's my turn
>she plays with her hair when she greets me
Mirin stories
Wow OP, one time a girl smiled while talking to me
You must have had shit on your face.
Is hair touching really a sign of attraction? Girls often touch their hair when I pass by them or when our eyes meet, but I refuse to believe they're mirin since I consider myself average or even below average looking.
Yes, you fucking turd.
>be cashier
>not a great job, but money is steady
>going about my day, see 400lbs autist in line with his mother
>evertime i see him looking at me he quickly turns away and giggles
>its his turn, buys 4 candy bars for which his mom pays
>can see the tired, dead look in her eyes
>lardo is still trying desperatly not to make eyecontact by pretending not to look at me
>can see the sweat dripping
>mosquito flies in my hair, flick it away
>beautiful mind says h..hello
>i say hi?
>he giggles and looks away, not moving
>his mom pushes him along, i hear him whisper i.. i l.love you too
>go back to my business
>get a coffee at starbucks
>she drew a :) next to my name
You made it brah, finally have a gf
Making it brah
Now you need to roar your masculinity and fuck her right there with a barbell
A powerlifting girl stared at my ass today in the gym.
They're like strippers homie. They do that to make you feel special and give bigger tips and keep coming back.
Same at hooters
I had a note written saying "you are so sweet :)" despite never talking to the waitress besides giving my orders
>in sports massage school
>in new class and about to get leg massage from some milf
>Go down to underwear and lie on table
>We start getting instructions and while that's happening she feels my quads
>"Gosh you're so solid"
> every 5 minutes she says a new compliment
>"Geez you're so big" "Wow you're so tall" "geez you look strong" "your legs are like tree trunks" "your back is so wide"
>she keeps approaching me during lunch breaks to give me seated shoulder massages
>also overhear during a conversation between her and other grills in class that she loves big strong guys because they can easily throw her around in the bedroom
Feelsgoodmang, I want to smash but not sure what approach to take
"are you free on ____?"
watch her say "yes" before you can say the date
"let's go _____ (coffee, fast food, etc. something casual), where can i pick you up at?"
bam, you got a date. given your status, courtesy dictates you fuck her on the second date so she doesn't feel like too much of a slut.
shit isn't complicated. if she says no then she's playing games and she can eat shit.
hopefully you don't need more advice than that
also what the fuck is sports massage school
>sports massage school
>part of the curriculum is getting a massage
>take off your clothes during "class"
Is this what "massage school" really entails?
>on vacation with friends (3 guys, 5 girls)
>we rented a villa with pool
>both couples had each their own bedrooms, three girls shared a room and I got the last room for myself
>first night I got wasted and slept longer
>it was hot as fuck so I slept naked
>I hear them calling me to join them for breakfast, but I prefer to nap another 10 minutes, covering my face the pillow to avoid the sun
>hear one of the girls running towards my room 'user wake up, we got some coffee & croissants'
>I'm not moving, shout that I'll be there in 5 but my drunk ass was not loud enough and they were aready blasting music
>she opens the door
>fuck
>I did not consider that she'll just burst in
>shocked face under the pillow, I'm completely naked lying on my stomach, still not moving
>I hear no reaction, door is not shut, no steps, she is still there
>a few seconds later I hear a camera shutter sound and her running away without shutting the door
>took a long shower before I joined them
>thought it is going to be awkward but suprisingly I kept my cool and did not show any reaction
>she was kinda nervous and avoided eye contact
Fucked her a few nights later and during the whole trip. We had a few drinks and as soon as we both were alone I just looked her in the eyes and said 'I heard it'. She was a little sunburned but you could see her blushing. Really cute. Told her to show me the picture.
Yeah I guess I shouldn't overcomplicate things
Sports Massage school is what it sounds like, you study to be a massage therapist who specializes in massage therapy for sporting athletes
And yeah, we have to practice the techniques we learn on actual people, so yes we regularly strip down in class in practical and massage each other, was weird at first but everyone just strips down in their underwear with no shame and just takes turns practicing techniques.
(Pretty fun to watch)
>Masseuse
>39
>touches my shoulders at lunch
>Solid
"You look good"
Ahhh, A-aaany girls? Ever get to message tits or their sweet walls??
post pic of your body.
>>a few seconds later I hear a camera shutter sound and her running away without shutting the door
I call bullshit, no one would take a pic in that situation caught off guard.
also, pot pic, no homo.
>walk into dairy queen
>ask for extra cream
>"you can cream on my face"
>"how much is that?"
>"its not on the menu"
>"i think i forgot my wallet sorry"
How to Fuck Up a Pasta: the Post
what
>just graduated school
>party with class, get smash faced
>see one fucker without shirt on, he told me have trained for 2 years
>mfw when he still looks like a dyel
>one of his friends takes his shirt off aswell
>mfw when he only trained for 2 weeks, looks like a skinny stick
>fuck yolo swag, ima take my tshirt off aswell then
>2 girls at the party wants to do completion on who got best body
>i clearly win, the other guys had no abs or chest at all
>i put on my shirt again
>2 mins later a 8/10 qt comes and takes off my shirt and starts kissing me
>feels good
If true, Gj bro.
He failed to make fun of OPs story.
kek
Dude, women have their phone in their hands 12 hours a day.
>dancing @summerburst with tight shirt
> from nowhere girls tries to lift up shirt from behind
>i go "Nono" and wigle My finger like the no way u know
>turn around take of shirt so she can se My abs and not My fatty back
>instantly starts touching My abs n chest
>her friends come along we all start dancing
>was just gonna lean in and kiss first girl
>some Fag that Also has Veeky Forums body comes and takes of shirt jumps in the middle
>i go fuck dis and slowly start dancing backwards in to the crowd
Kek
Now that is the true definition of getting cucked, you fucking beta pussy.
Ayy lmao
My new class I transferred to recently, besides my teacher, I'm the only guy in my class in a class of 15, and they're all kind af, feels fucking good man
>ever get to massage their tits or sugar walls
One cougar in my old class gave me a semi when we were learning to do a chest massage and she told me to massage the top of her boobs because her tits were more sensitive after her boob job, and that she loves boob massages.
But nah we don't massage the sugar walls senpai, we get close though when massaging the adductors, but everything I'm saying rarely happens, and half the time I was massaging dudes, and the occasional hairy hambeast who doesn't wash themselves
Nah, I'm fat and dyel by Veeky Forums standards
>Nah, I'm fat and dyel by Veeky Forums standards
yeah, but were anonymous, I'm not asking for your face user.
Yap guess so
Fucking excellent
What the fuck? Her upper arms are tiny.
stop reading your mom's blog, faggot
Do you tards really get excited if a girl even shows remote signs of interests ? What the fuck?
I'll just give you a month old pic I took since I don't have any shirtless pics nor can I be bothered taking one right now tbqh
he is taking the piss out of these terrible 'mirin' threads
you look pretty good imo, thanks.
>that trash bin
What the fuck. The entire gym looks poor as fuck.
>I had a note written saying "you are so sweet :)" despite never talking to the waitress besides giving my orders
Uncomplicated customers are always a servers favorite.
Sweet self-esteem there bro.
pham im dyel and can make my tricep look big taking weird pics like this
>not training in a poverty gym for dem humbleness gains
Thanks m8
It's a pretty good gym desu, it just gets trashed by 8pm and the staff are slow to clean it up because it's 24h, so they wait to do most of the cleaning past 11pm
...
I never said I wasn't dyel by Veeky Forums standards, but just for reference I'm 6'6 so it's harder for me to look more filled out proportionately
One time a stripper told me she wants me to come back
Have I officially made it?
Yes, congratulation.
Wow, I can't believe that he would make fun of OP like that. I think that poster needs to be more considerate of other people's feelings. OP, if you're there, I'm so sorry you had to endure that
>Hello darling
Thank you for defending my safe space.
>working in gym
>i repair some machine
>asian cutie goes to the legpress next to me
>does her reps
>looks at me for rest of the day
>2 days later
>girl is there again
>smile at each other when saying hey
>she comes to the counter a couple of times asking useless questions
>"what time is it?"
>5 mins later "do you close earlier today?"
>later when she left again trying to start a conversation "well, enough for today"
what u think should i ask for her number or not enough yet
Have confidence in yourself man
>walking into gym
>pass girl coming out
>she says hi and smiles
Made it brahs
Jesus fucking christ you are autistic
She can't hear you yell with the music and the door closed but you can hear her shutter sound under the pillow with the door open ?
This is why I visit this board
sure she wasn't just playing with her hair because its soft?
>deep south
>jog my neighbourhood shirtless because fuck you it's hot as balls
>all the fat trailer trash stare at me with dirty looks
>at home
>qt milf from proxy server pops up
>says waddup hot stuff
>sperg out and close window
>mfw cocoon mode
bruh you made it
Yes.
They were on the patio, listening to music and my door was shut. On her way to my room I shouted but like I said I was not loud enough. Is it that implausible that I hear her camera shutter sound while she is in my room, but she could not hear me while leaving loud surroundings behind on her way to my room?
>my gf says lots of guys say hi to her while she's working out
>haha silly you dont even know how many guys hit on me at work
>at least 20-30 a day as a cashier
>tfw you will never be a god among men
2/10
>A trash bin between the machines
For what purpose?
for tampons, smelly shaker cups, tampons and paper towels after wiping machines
I dunno if this thread is ironic or not, but shit kinda happened I guess.
>work for a shitty church in the media department
>boss looks exactly like Satsuki from Kill la Kill
>ohshitfam
>she's anti-social as fuck and never talks to me unless she has to
>even if we walk past each other in the halls she doesn't say shit to me
>started lifting a year ago
>maybe six months ago notice she occasionally says shit to me now
>random shit like cracking a joke
>even waves at me when she's walking past me
Maybe I'm just autistic for noticing small shit, but she's acting different. Who knows?
>lying on the internet
not purely muscle related mire:
yesterday:
>get message on skype from a girl I called a slut for fucking too many guys like 8 months ago
>make video call
>talk for half an hour
>pretty good to train conversation skills because she has pretty much no personality
>air kisses towards the cam and giggles
today:
>she calls again
>talk about how our day was
>her bf (didn't know about him yet) left for a one week trip today
>she tells me how hot I am
>light flirting for like an hour
>sends me a pic with a lighter version of "I love you"
is she trying to cuck that motherfucker?
Also what are good movies to watch when inviting her for a date?
face kinda looks like pic but she has smaller tits
>boss looks exactly like Satsuki.
That'd be love at first sight for me.
Get on that user.
Show her your resolve.
Do it for me.
I want to user, but she's blue pilled as fuck when it comes to religion.
You know she's a slut and has a bf, and you still want to go for her? How desperate are you?
>>pretty good to train conversation skills
What?
Movie is not important.
close encounter
>virgin because I hate meeting new people
>would literally fuck anything
>i hear him whisper i.. i l.love you too
top kek
>user calls chick slut
>user sees chance to fuck slut
>user throws all previous moral obligations overboard
imma shmalayan your ass right now: you're the slut
if you can keep a conversation going that completely relies on your input you can pretty much talk to anyone
some people are so autistic they need to practice "talking humanly"
>"do you close earlier today?"
how can you miss it ..........................
It is implausible, you know what you have to do right ?
Pic or it didn't happen.
not that user but do we really wanna see another skinnyfat faggot?
kekked
I j-just want to admire his glutes, n-no homo.
>ayy babe, you mirin'?
>Yeah you mirin'
>want some of this dick?
(casually point at your stick)
>pound that poon on the counter
>get her number sooner or later
kek, thought the same
so how do i ask her for number? i literally got no problem asking for a girls number but only if i either know her for a bit or I approached her instead of her me.
for some reason i'm always autistic when a girl approaches me, when i approach them i just get their number and talk normal with them
>at cvs with wife
>see milf in workout clothes come in
>check her out and then think nothing of it
>grt back in my car and see her getting in hers
>looking me dead in the eyes with her bright blue eyes and flashes a smile.
Good boost of confidence right der
>At airport
>Wearing free shirt ROTC gave me
>Going through security
>Have to get frisked for some reason
>Strong TSA man feels my bicep
>Asks if I'm in the airforce
>Tell him no, I just have the shirt
>Walk away
fucked him later that night in the baggage claim
well she said it because the gym was a bit empty (like 5 ppl in there)
she came to me and asked if we close earlier or something while laughing, i tell her "no, it's always empty on thursday and smile at her" then she walked off
it is if it's the plot of a porno
Whoa sauce on asian qt
...
I work at starbucks. My coworker does that to all the guys so that they give her tips and it works
...
Nah you're in there senpai, go claim your waifu.