Tfw I've accidentally Pavlovian conditioned my ass so I need a shit everytime I go running

>tfw I've accidentally Pavlovian conditioned my ass so I need a shit everytime I go running
>now I have to run with a sore bleeding ass

GOD DAMMIT

Dude wut lmao

What the fuck are you eating?

I have a tear in my asshole that 're-tears' everytime I have a shit and I refuse to go to the doctor

Sure you're not just wiping too hard?

I used to be an adventurer just like you until I took a wet wipe to my ass.

I am extra careful

Occasionally I need to push a hemorrhoid back into my anus with he toilet paper

>Occasionally I need to push a hemorrhoid back into my anus with he toilet paper

Bro, you just have to stop wiping for a couple of days. You'll be good as new after.

But how would I have a shit

are you fucking retarded go to the doctor idiot
or don't and prove darwin right

I would honestly rather die than spread my ass in front of a doctor

Anus tears are actually pretty normal

Nothing to bother the doctor about

american thread.

Serious note:

If you have blood in your poo that cannot be accounted for by hemorrhoids, get that shit checked out asap.

I didn't and now I have a permanent disease that requires immune-system weakening meds in pill form and bimonthly 2-3 hour IV infusions.

I don't know if things would've worked out differently if I had had it checked out sooner, but I know I would have prevented the infection that exacerbated the disease and caused my to lose all my gains.

exacerbated the disease temoporarily*

... or permanently. I don't know.

>tfw I've Pavlovian conditioned my ass so I always need to shit before my workouts
better before than during, I always say. But the worst is when it doesn't want to come out until I've finished a couple of warmup sets.

...

I've been feeling pretty bad about myself lately. But seeing that people like you exist makes me feel less like shit.

You could also have ass cancer! Or internal bleeding! Seriously, blood in stool is bad news regardless of the cause so do as this user says and literally get your shit checked out.

The better question is how the fuck did you Pavlovian condition your ass to shit WHILE RUNNING. That would make for an interesting story.