I think I did the right thing, yet still sucks being the "bad guy"

I think I did the right thing, yet still sucks being the "bad guy"

>be oldfag (early 30s)
>have gf
>all going well for a while
>she starts showing less and less affection
>doesnt initiate sex, or show any interest to begin with
>doesnt reciprocate affection
>wont hold hands
>says hitting and slapping me is how she shows she "likes someone"
>get fed up after last night
>dump her today

somehow IM the asshole according to her girlfriends

fuck this girl

i think i did the right thing though

more gainz for me

She was too much of a pussy to break up with you.

You did the right thing.

sounds about right thanks bro

>>/r/theredpill

you were probably so beta that she stopped being attracted to you

im guessing thats what happened desu

i got too comfortable and went beta

learned the lesson to never get so comfortable you go beta

question though, if i was the beta pussy, why did SHE bawl her eyes out and i didnt?

Did the right thing

Cause you're the one that ended it obviously

makes em crazy

Good. That's the first step.
Now you need to stop jacking off, stop having sex, and never have a sexual or intimate relationship again.

good point

funny thing is i did the "manly" thing and was direct, honest and told her to her face, not over text or something

didnt sugarcoat or make excuses
basuically said that im not feeling that "this is working out", that "we had talked about this and yuou said this and didnt actually do anything about it"

and IM the bad guy

oh well i really dont feel bad about it, just means i can actually have time to go to the gym and not have to spend another night watching Ink Master in silence while she passes out only to back out on going to the gym in the morning

got so bad for a while i was using viagra since she sersiously didnt excite me, like fucking me was a chore

leaving humanity?

Sometimes people fall out of love. Sometimes people realize that they are in a long term relationship and their partner's goals may not align with theirs. She probably wanted to break up as well but didn't have the balls to do it herself. You did the right thing, though obviously we are only getting one side of the story.

As for her crying: she's a girl. Whether it's genuine emotions or a ploy to gain sympathy, they are going to cry.

Yes. If you do all of those things, aliens will consider you to be more equal to them than before. But we are a long ways off from becoming perfect equals.

Yeah bro she cried because when you get dumped it means you're undesirable (to that person at least), shit hurts so no wonder she cried.

Her friends are calling you a dick because they dont know your situation from your perspective, all they know is some guy made their friend cry.

You did the right thing, lol if you sat there and took that shit you'd be a beta faggot. Sure maybe you caused her to stop liking you as much but now you know, move on.

i wish i could tell you her side, im sure it would be something like "he did it out of nowhere, hes an asshole"

we had never had a fight, sure some arguments but we actually talked and never yelled, i dont know i think i just fell out of love which is kinda fucked up cuz when i dumped her she was like "you said you loved me the other day", couldnt just say that i was going through the motions, said something you dont act like it

this was something we had talked about, i had told her im an affectionate person, and her not showing interest or anything like that confused me, she said shed work on it, and ibviously she didnt

this went on for another month or so of me getting frustrated of her not showing any interest and trying to be understainding, thinking it was a phase or something but it just went on and on, even would steal glances at her phone while she texted and she was texting with two other guys

pretty much had enough after she started thinking itd be funny to start hitting me, not like real hitting but little slaps to the face even when i told her not to

i could go on and on but yes, like you said we only have one side of the story, i just couldn't take it anymore, it felt like a chore hanging out with her only to do nothing, i could have been getting so many projects and things done

what this guy said

Absolutely T R A N S C E N D E N T

Sounds like she lost attraction because you're not sexually aggressive enough.

Pretty common, especially once you get to the relationship stage.

>be oldfag (early 30s)
That's not what oldfag means, you fucking newfag cunt.

>not sexually aggressive enough

well; thats just plain confusing

when we were fucking (enthusiastically), she was the submissive and id tie her up, flog her, slap her, choke her and it was amazing, like you said though, could be the relationship shit, either way confusing as fuck, just glad to not had the headache

more like a R E L A T I O N S H I T

Yeah but you have to project it outside the bedroom too

good point i probably let her disrespect me and it grew into a thing or some shit

like i said, lesson learned!

I feel for you OP
>be engaged for less than a year
>she was my GF for a little over 2
>she stopped initiating sex, stopped reciprocating emotion
>talked to her, she shoved it off
>thought maybe something else was troubling her that she wasn't ready to talk about
>this behavior continues for a little over 2 months
>I try to talk to her again and she doesn't want to talk, she's essentially a stranger in my house and we barely even talk anymore
>I break off the engagement and kick her out
>find out she had been diagnosed with Cervical cancer back in July 2016, but had frequent appointments with an oncologist who were tracking her Pap smears and sending pieces of her tissue to pathologists for 3 months
>she posted it all over Facebook with her diagnosis and how I ended our engagement
>had to delete Facebook and all social media
>she moved in with her parents and I guess she begins round 1 of chemotherapy and radiation to her abdomen next week
Welp.... Maybe I should try calling her again I dunno why she withheld this info. I would have probably married her to put her under my insurance plan

Bro, you should have called her immediately, that's a damn shame to break it off for that reason, especially if you really like her.

>according to her girlfriends

Not shit, cause they only got her side of the story and they're bias to side with her anyway..

All they heard was that you hurt their friend...

What the hell, how were you supposed to know she had cervical cancer? And why did she make you out to be some scum who broke up with her because of her cancer, when she clearly knew you didnt know?

She sounds like a piece of shit. Fuck her if she did that to spite you.

If I'm missing something please say so because holy shit what a dirty little slut to do that

True true, I'll swing by her house after work to discuss

People act irrational and do weird things all the time, especially in a situation like that in which she was probably scared and didn't want to upset him.

It's a real terrible reason to lose her, he should definitely call her.
Yeah definitely do that. Try and be understanding and assuring too, women do lots of crazy shit like that and it'd be petty to hold it against her.

OP didn't explain this well enough. It's not clear whether she made the FB post about how he broke shit off BECAUSE of her cancer, or whether she made the FB post about how she had cancer and also just got dumped (unrelated)

It doesn't really matter, it's still a fucking stupid reason to lose a girl you were ready to marry.

op here

my story and the guy whos gf had cancer are two different people

Why the fuck would you let that continue for two months? Sounds like you guys really lacked communication and broke up. Cancer had little tod o with it.

It does matter, that's a really fucked up thing to do if she had those intentions. Fucked up enough to call off the marriage

Also, be happy that she didn't cheat on you to get you to break up with her. Many think this is an acceptable method of terminating a relationship.

You're the asshole? You lucked out.

im thinking she WAS probably fucking some dude on the side

its better that i got out when i did

Found the newfag

OP I had the same happening to me. There is nothing you can do. She was definitely a good match, funny, interesting, but I just lost the feeling of love for reasons to long to explain. I tried for months to make it work but like you said, it was like a chore and I had no interest in sex with her.

Really made me sad to break it up with her, she is a good girl after all. But it was just lifeless for me.

Nice blogpost OP :)

Stop taking advice from redpill virgins. She didnt agree with you on stuff but didnt want the confrontation so she lied and hoped you wouldn't be mad. You just werent a good match.

kek

>you just werent a good match

lol, and why was he the bad match and not her? this is something a beta faggot would say

Because obviously she didn't agree with the things that bothered him and wasn't willing to stop doing them.

Sounds a lot more reasonable than "you should have raped her so she's too scared to leave you, that's how women are biologically coded and if you disagree you're beta".

my bro... my friend and companion... my tovarasch... how to put this to you my friend... you dun fucked up and u didn't repair it.

no you retard. when a relationship doesnt work out, its because she was a bad match. I cant be a bad match, because I picked her.

if youre some acceptance seeking faggot who gets pegged every night then maybe youd be the bad match. but as long as im the man I am not the problem.

What point are you even trying to make, your mind is scattered as all fuck.

I'm not the OP. I'm giving an example.

If you cant understand my point it just further cements the fact that your mentality is so fucked beyond repair theres no hope.

I'm going to explain this to you because I'm bored and I want less betas on this board.

You said he was a bad match for her. Why didnt you say "they were a bad match," or "she was a bad match for you"?

Because your mentality is fucked. You believe the guy needs to meet the girl's standards, you believe the guy is the one that needs to keep the girl, he needs to be a "good match" for a girl. If you think like this you'll never make it.

The girl needs to meet the standards of the guy. The girl needs to keep the guy's interest and attention, the girl needs to be a "good match" for the guy. This isn't some weird, macho theory or anything either. It's fucking science. The guy asks the girl out, the guy chooses the girl. The alpha has more hoes he can get, but he has more important things going on anyway. He dumps her when shes not a good match.

Do you understand now?

I am quite bored too so allow me to reply.

I am not the guy you were talking too, I said nothing prior to call you a scattered brain as your comment made close to no sense.

Now, I understand the point you're making. If I fulfill my role as the male than I can not be the wrong one as I have fulfilled my duty as the male. Like a connection between two nodes, if I can fulfill my roles and send the packets across the network but they're not getting there than obviously it's the other node that has the issue.

Now that, in and of itself, is a fair point but relationships are not rigid and both of you aren't machines. Additionally, you are not the ideal representation of the male form nor are you as learned, wise and grown up as you'll ever be. There's a small chance you might be, but you're posting on Veeky Forums so I'll take a safeshot and say you're not.

Relationships are organic. Both sides must learn, both sides must grow, both sides must compromise and both sides must communicate. It's not a matter of "if I do my part then I can't be the wrong one". Sometimes your partner is in a shit mood. Sometimes they're having a bad day just like sometimes you might be in a bad mood or might be having a bad day. It's the responsibility of both of you to understand and read each other and let some shit slide when you realize it's temporary and when you know that the other side is working on it. Just like how you can trust that the other side will do the same for you. Here is where OP's girlfriend failed and OP being a pretty rational guy realized it, maybe just subconsciously, and fucked right off, which is what he should have done.

This is REGARDLESS of the role you're both fulfilling, male, female or mentally ill. You're retarded and a child.

Get fucked.

What the fuck I'm not even the guy you were talking to. They were a bad match because they disagreed on critical things, that's it. End of story.

I agree with this.

It's the equivalent of sucking up and maintaining professionalism at work.
You can be right but you need to account for human nature in the equation.

You are right and also wrong. In relationships people compromise to make things work. You should be smart enough to know when your girl is having her period, and you should know when to comfort her if she's feeling bad. But the man leads. The woman compromises more than he does, he very rarely falters in his decisions or behaviors.

If I am not a perfect human that does not mean that I have to become self conscious and start thinking I need to meet her standards, seek acceptance, and other beta bullshit you probably do daily. I recognize her flaws, and if I chose her anyway, I will deal with them. Any of my own laws that I recognizere are not acceptable, and I eliminate them immediately.

How are you disagreeing with me? Nothing you have said is contradicting a point I have made.

Early thirties is getting late, dont you want a family?

You need to get your brain checked, maybe a little therapy to ease the stress.

I disagree with you because I am stating that in a relationship, regardless of the role you are fulfilling, both sides are equal in responsibility.

You seem to think that because male and female present differences in behavior and actions that one is excused from following the proper dance move while the other is expected to compensate for the other's pride.

Go ahead. Do that. You'll be the king your world but the fool of everyone else's.

I stand by my statement that you are retarded and a child but I am no longer bored so cheers mate.

>spot the mormon

Im not religious

>spot the clock hound

Wat

Did I say the man was excused from error? I said the opposite, dense fuck.

In a relationship, I am not an idiot and I recognize any mistakes I make. These are usually not present though, because I'm not an awkward retard. If the relationship fails, it is either because of logistics, or the girl fucked it up.

Of course, I have made mistakes. A couple have ended relationships. These I do not blame on the girl. But this is not a common occurrence.

c-clock hound bruh

She lied to her soon to be husband about a life changing illness. Sucks for her to have it, sure, but it was a dick move on her part and had to tone ahewd with the marriage, sets up a path where you get lied to and used.

Don't go back OP, don't try and patch it up. I know you cared for her deeply, but she lied to you and after she got busted she shit talked you to all her friends.

Right now she would only view you as a healthcare ticket. The most important thing I learned with relationships is to never go back to old ones, the reasons it failed before will still be there and make it fail again.

Whats that mean

a woman with a heavily ticking biological clock that wants to get pregnant

You had to do what was right for you, you can't be with someone you don't trust and respect.

You did the right thing, hope you let her down gently and without bitterness.

Im a dude tho

that's even worse than

:0


Family values are lame my dudes
Dont get married XP
Just fuck around our birthrates will fix themselves.

Hoorah for more immigrants

It was a joke mate, like, it's worse that your biological clock is ticking since you're male... I was trying to bant, my bad

and I agree, family is important for the preservation of our peoples and it is our best framework for development, survival and thriving

Oh, Im just autistic

All you young men out here go find a nice wife and have a bunch of kids.


If your an immigrant go and party ex dee
Yolo
Your only young once :DDD
BLM! BLM!

So do you have a family of your own?

Yes married 2 chillins atm

I'm sorry I don't understand

Im married and have two children at the moment

Congrats, are you from europe?

Canada, one of the last whites in my city to be honest

Good luck mate, remember, there's always the fatherland to return to

Doubt france is much better at the moment, or ukraine on the wifes side.

White flight doesnt save us if we dont breed though, well just keep running till theres no where to run. Anyways going to sleep now.

Cheers and night

How can you be this autistic in your early thirties
kill yourself

fuck the hell. Why the fuck would she keep that from you when your about to get married wtf. You could have at least called her parents at least to see if they knew before you, or she could of just set it up to play victim and make you feel like pure shit, ever do anything wrong user?

Gurls mang, i had a lot of fights with my GF one month ago and we had a breakup for a week, after that i bought her flowers presents and took her to dinner, eventually she started to act weird again changing her phone pw wanting the keys back and said i couldn't come over next weekend because she needed ''alone'' time.

I found out that she fucked with some other dude and still looks those guys up on FB she mett on tinder and broke up immedietly, her response was that i was the bad guy for looking through her phone and FB.

Aslong as he doesn't know right, i seriously want to torch this bitch's place down.

And mind, she fucked the dude during the breakup, but she still was looking them up on FB after we got back together.

I feel cucked.

>>she posted it all over Facebook with her diagnosis and how I ended our engagement

Wait, she has a problem with telling her fiancé about her current health state, but she has no problem posting all of her problems on shekelbook?

What did she exactly write in her post? Did she state that you broke up with her and kicked her out because of her cancer?

>somehow IM the asshole according to her girlfriends

You're always going to be the bad guy in women's eyes, no matter what the truth is. Accept it and not give a shit. You can't change that anymore than you can change the weather.

>You're always going to be the bad guy in women's eyes, no matter what the truth is.

This

she's a shitty person, move on. don't let someone who does things like that bring you down

>she fucked the dude during the breakup
>we had a breakup for a week

That's fast.

>be me
>17 at the time
>forced to start bf&gf relationship with best friend or lose friend
>she didn't like me hooking up with the other girls in the group as well as her
>so she decided she would put an ultimatum on me to force a relationship
>I reluctantly agree which pissed all the other girls off
>I warned her early on this is going to be too much stress for a 16 year
>also we dont drive and rely on parents
>doesn't care
>fast forward several months im 18 shes now 17
>I get arested for being outside my own school 30 minutes after school let out
>i droped out got my GED 2 months later and started working
>i start in on her and her parents on how they treated her
>the parents start to try and sabatoge me since i threaten their reign of power
>eventually stress got to her and she ends it over the phone
>i wasn't upset, just more pissed off that she forced me to deal with that shit
>over literally nothing
>i still lost a child hood friend i knew since she was like 8 or 9 years old
>i lost a "second" family
>all over tha fact that this girl couldn't deal with waiting for school to be over
>or she couldn't handle that we would hook up and id go see another chick later
>still total waste of time

Too be honest though, i still have a soft spot for her, mainly since i knew this would happen about a year prior i dont hold any hatred. I just feel like it was a waste of effort on my part and it took like 13 months of my time and patience to not even get anywhere in the end. Also it did make it difficult to hit up the other chicks since they still were burned from me getting off the market for a while. I still had something to get by for a while, then i just got bored of it and being used by women (heh funny to read that) in a way that women claim men use them. Its kind of interesting to experience.

...

Yes
She put specifically
"Diagnosed with cervical cancer and my fiancé ended our relationship and I moved back in with my mom and dad. Family is definitely thicker than water."

Doesn't overtly say I broke up with her due to her cancer, but certainly implied it.

My Facebook was flooded with messages investigating why I broke things off because of her cancer, and I decided to just delete Facebook.

Am still planning on talking to her in 4 hours when I get off work to maybe try to hash things up.

>Her friends are calling you a dick because they dont know your situation from your perspective, all they know is some guy made their friend cry.
Correction, they don't care.

Your lesson should be not to date women who are into weird submissive sex. People might say that it's just a kink and that it doesn't matter what you like in bed but you know it's not true. Sexually submissive girls are disloyal morally corrupt sluts. It's not confined to the bedroom, it's a lifestyle and it's the way they are. When she's tired of you (will take a few weeks) she will go and try to find someone more exciting to fuck. She will get off of it because 1) she's with another, more exciting, more aggressive guy 2) she's being treated more like a slut and a cumbucket 3) she knows she's cheating on you and that makes her feel even more like a slut

Girls who are into submissive sex is not gf material. It's the biggest fucking red flag of them all. It should be obvious to anyone who isn't a porno addict that anything more kinky than light spanking when fucking in doggy is weird and not romantic and shouldn't really be something sexually exciting unless you have substantial emotional baggage.

>I'm the asshole according to her friends
>according to her friends
>her friends

>somehow

Autism

Fuck that, only thing you did wrong was to delete your facebook (fucking cuck). She can't tell her future husband about something she doesn't have any qualms about throwing out in a self-pitying facebook status, she isn't mature enough to be a wife. Especially when she implied you knew it and obviously wanted people to blame you for her wrongdoings. Why the fuck would you want to talk to her again? Marry her and suffer, move on and find someone who isn't an immature emotionally unstable cunt.

>>I get arested for being outside my own school 30 minutes after school let out
wtf? is this some kind of american backwards fascist law? what crime had you committed?

This desu. Even though it sucks.

You ever hear of those guys who thought everything was great in their marriage right up to the point where their wife left them taking everything and turning their kids against him? Of course you have, you're on Veeky Forums. This is the best warning you will ever get that she's likely to do that.

He reasons for not telling you no longer matter. They just don't fucking matter anymore even if they were of the best intentions because she took no restraint when shouting to the world how much of an ass you are and how evil you are for leaving her when she has cancer. Never mind the fact you didn't fucking know. You are not, nor will you ever be a partner to her. You are a tool to her to give her things she wants and can be thrown in a pile of shit by her for any reason. Do not go back to her for any reason dude.

op here (surprised this thread is still up)

dont want kids or marriage

I had a girlfriend who I broke up with once told me (on my questioning her for lack of sexual congress), "I'm just like this now. I won't always be like this. If I'm like my mom, after menopause I'll want sex all the time."
"...after menopause..."
>stay with me without regular sex and you'll be rewarded when we're 50 and you can get lots of sex with my 50-year-old body. Maybe.

I just broke up with my fiance of a year (we just passed our 3 year anniversary) because we don't feel the sexual connection anymore and haven't had sex in 6 months. Is this how all long term relationships pan out? We match up on everything else like views/beliefs and interests but just lost the passion somewhere along the way. Bros... tell me this isn't how they all turn out....

You dodged a fucking bullet man. Good for you. Don't stalk her through social media or it can backfire

nah im not, im prrtty much washing my hads of it

just ssucks cuz we had a lot of mutual friends and shes taking them with her

doesnt bother me tho i just got a n email this morning that i got a contract job offered in iraq, so ill be taking that

>according importance to what women not related to you have to say about your behavior