Why does it seem like Austria completely fucking sucked in every war they were in during the last 400 years?

...

Because they were a confusing clusterfuck of nationalities with no common interest. Before 1806 Austria didn't even exist, there was a Hapsburg Empire and Austrian lands were only a part of it.

However the Habsburgs did a wonderful job of using this myriad of ethnicities as cannon fodder. In fact the empire survived for that long solely because it had an almost unlimited supply of Slavic and Hungarian troops, who were extremely fierce and savage in combat. After confronting Austria in 1809, Napoleon said that the Slavic Grenzers were the only warlike troops in the entire Austrian army.

Its pretty ironic how you say they won every single war with the Turks and then you laugh at PLC.

Clear indicator that winning wars isn't everything.

>Radlický
Never heard of him, but this surename sure sounds Czech, not really Austrian.

As oposed to Alvinczy and Savoy?

>Based Castillians carried Austrian,Italian,Flemish,Portuguese,Catalan and native numales to 150 years of dominance with 1/4 of the population of France

Not on my watch

>Moravian nationality

Josef Václav Radecký z Radče

Poles won 70% battles they fought. I don't know what you're talking about.

I love how Poles on Veeky Forums get so easily flustered every single time

>says something retarded
>gets corrected
HUR DA POLAKS

Please stop posting already, you embarassing virgins

>Poles won 70% battles
As mentioned, it is not always about winning, losing in style is equally important, and apparently Austrians managed to lose a couple wars without having their empire fall apart.

You know, the butthurt is pretty distinctive.

>If I call them virgins no one will see how retarded my post was xD
Sure

geeze what sort of terrain modifiers were you getting

How do you think the ottomans got till vienna if they won every war against them.

Extremely embarassing virgin post, please leave this board

>Because they were a confusing clusterfuck of nationalities.
So basically: like many states in Europe?

>Romanov Russia
>Polish-Lithuania
>UNITED KINGDOM

Hell you can also argue that there was no French nation prior the French Revolution.

But user, the Austrians won that war. Turk's army bleed out in front of Vienna, twice. YOu should know, Poles saved the day.

>fair and square
This is why Napoleon defeated half a dozen coalitions.

...

What the fuck is going on here?

You don't just walk to the enemy's capital without a fight.

The Eternal Habsburg

This is a his map with the stats of the Austrian Army from 1495 to 1878. It shows where the main battles took place.

... of 182 Battles 97 were won
... of 5.160 individual combats 2.291 were won ...

From the year 1601 to 1878 there were 116 years of peace and 161 years of war ...

22 wars against France, 9 wars against "the half-moon", 10 wars against italian states, 5 against Prussia, 4 against Spain, 3 wars against Bavaria, 2 wars in each case against the Swedes, Denmark, the Barbary Coast and each 1 war against russia, Saxony, Switzerland and Egypt ...

the 100 most important (for Austria) battles are plotted in the map.

>Austrians won that war.
More like spanish won that war...

>Poles won 70% battles they fought
that's not hard when all they fight are turks, fellow slavshits and some swedes

>Bella gerant alii, tu felix Austria nube
ever heard this?

>More like spanish won that war...
Especially since Spain wasn't even involved in that war you dumb cunt.

t.

>Wallenstein
Waldstein*
Amerifat get out

You don't need to win battles if you fuck/buy/bribe the enemy.

One could say that they played to their strengths.

Apparently you don't need to be the God of War just to rule over some minor Balkan tribes, it is enough to just K.u.K. them and be a tad smarter.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fucking,_Austria

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fugging

g*rmans in charge of renaming slavic settements lmao

Von savoyen is an austrian
he's of the same dinasty that unified italy kek

>British and American soldiers based in nearby Salzburg noticed the name afterWorld War II, and began to travel to the village to have their photos taken beside the signs while striking various poses. The local residents, the Fuckingers, were considerably bemused as they had not previously been aware of the meaning of their village's name when read as English
>The local residents, the Fuckingers

Source: For God and Kaiser

The austrian emperors had a special relationship with the army and they did NOT play with their soldiers lives. They REFUSED to sacrifice the lives of the soldiers and would rather lose a battle than throw men into their deaths for "muh honor" and "muh prestige" unlike everyone else. Furthermore, the austrian cavalry was the best cavalry in the world. Brits repeatedly said this.

I recommend the above mentioned book for the entire history of the austrian army since its beginning to the end of WW1. After reading it you'll see just how much retarded meme bullshit gets spewed here about Austro-Hungary and so on (see OP).

yalebooks.yale.edu/book/9780300219678/god-and-kaiser

Even with all that said, it is both true and was and is understood both by contemporaries and modern scholars that Austria was never a militaristic country/empire and that they never even attempted to be one. They relied on diplomacy and alliances to get their shit done. That is a far greater achievement. Lo and behold, the first Habsburgs were powerful people since the 10th century all the damn way until 1918. That's about a thousand years of relevancy, power and influence while many "greater" men and countries disintegrated in mere decades (but you still fellate them).

bümp

oo, I like that flag

>>loses thirty years war that was started by german peasants
They didn't lose the 30 year war

>>vienna itself is almost captured by kebab
Muh almost

>>btfo'd by napoleon for over ten years
So did everybody

>loses again in italy, this time to dirty italians
Dumb. Austria beat the Italians left and right

>consistently fucks up everything they do in WW1 and loses to fucking SERBIA
They were doing rather good in the Italian theatre and BTFO'd Serbia - Literally only country that didn't fall to trench warfare jerk but rather got occupied till the french re-took it in 1918

So as you can see, your thread is bullshit

ah yes, revisionism

You sure showed him wrong!

>The czech were still peasants ruled by Moravian nobles at the time
lol, Moravian noblemen ruling Moravia actually thought that the rebellion of Bohemian noblemen is pretty retarded

>consistently fucks up everything they do in WW1 and loses to fucking SERBIA
They were doing rather good in the Italian theatre and BTFO'd Serbia - Literally only country that didn't fall to trench warfare jerk but rather got occupied till the french re-took it in 1918

conquer Serbia with the help of Germans and Bulgarians

S*rbia stronk!

They were rather fucking up untill they removed that incompetant fieldmarschal in charge of the campaign at the start of the war. To lazy to check the name, Pucnik or some shit. Some Slovenian name. Doing retarded shit as charging the enemy's artillery training fields and so, tpical ww1 stuff. After that it was they blitzkried'd Serbia making their entire army along with the king run to corfu where the french dunkink'd them