Work out at gym

>2016

>not having your designated gymbro-falcon trainer give you rimjobs and powder your ass

Not op but there is literally nothing wrong with not wiping your ass after you shit when you're going to just be at home anyways.

Yeah but the the powder turns into dough and it's even fucking worse

>literally nothing wrong

Besides walking around in your faeces: no, nothing wrong at all

>retarded baby who can't stop putting sweet sugary things in his mouth and hasn't transitioned to a high protein low carb diet yet

they're clean dry rabbit pellets senpai

Who cares if you're going to be home by yourself
Just shower before sleep or before going out

I use this for swamp ass

>extra showers
>cold showers so you don't sweat afterwards
>ex officio boxer briefs
>zeasorb powder

Use baby powder.

poo in loooooooooooo

>why would you not wipe??
if i'm in a hurry I never wipe. or if I'm shitting in a public place

Is this what we've come to? Adults using butt powder?

Can't it be cured by staying hydrated or something?

Nothing "wrong" I guess but...you do this?

So disgusting I don't understand why you wouldn't wipe. It takes about a minute max to clean up properly. There is literally no advantage to not wiping.

Seth pls

>talc

enjoy your cancer

>not going full weeb

What is up with Veeky Forums and all these ass, rimjob, blood-in-shit, protein fart, squat ass, no ass, threads lately?

Nigga I wipe my hole raw, it don't make a bit of difference once the crack starts sweating

>tfw skinny as fuck
>bike home from work every day in basketball shorts
>ass sweats
>not matter how well I wipe,no matter how white the TP is after i am done, when I get home, there is always a slight smell of shit on the shorts even though there are no marks in my boxers

I don't fucking get it. Is it because of the hair in there that holds some shit particles? Does everyone's asshole smell after a day of activity unless you just showered?

I was under the impression that girls assholes without hair are like 100% clean all the time, like you could pull down their pants during the day and start eating their ass and it would taste fine

I guess I need wiping lessons or something :(

Why not just change your shorts you autistic potato?

Only sometimes

Now you get why Americans always get make fun of for wiping with paper instead of using a bidet.

The closest you can get is showering after every shit or in a pubbie bathroom singlet using your hands and the sink indian style and backing your asshole up to the blowdryer

Change my shorts in the middle of the ride? What?

There's a name for this? I thought I was just some mutant fuck that could never be naked around people.

This is why I am so afraid to have sex. Like I can't imagine you being at some hot sweaty party or bar or club or even a tinder date or girlfriend and you haven't showered since the morning and you take your pants off to have sex

Like
Wouldn't they smell it if they were down there sucking your dick 2 inches away from your asshole

Where are you that you're unable to prep before meeting up to have sex?

Shower your butthole, apply baby powder, and don't shit yourself.

Hopefully you've wiped properly so it won't be too bad...?
Or you can always suggest showering together beforehand, that can be fun

Had a friend who always suggested his girl get in the shower with him before he ate her out.

You'd think they'd get suspicious

>he's never read Fear of Flying
she has musician/composer bf that constantly leaves skidmarks on her sheets but she can't give him up

are you a fucking cosmetics industry viralbot or something? you don't have to be perfect to have sex

Yes I wipe properly and all but it's common knowledge that you can get swamp ass or even sweat in your ass crack and it can make it smell

As for "prepping beforehand" I'm referring to people who have sex at a club or party or something... They aren't showering right before they do it

Also what's wrong with having a girl shower before you eat out her pussy or ass? Those are really possible to smell even after nothing... Seems like they should ALWAYS shower before rhat

please stay neurotic and find a neurotic GF and make amateur porn

specifically i want dental hygiene as foreplay, maybe concern about how you can never get thongs truly clean

the reason you will never get laid is because of your anxiety about getting laid

I have no anxiety or neuroses actually. I'm really just curious as to how clean everyone is down there, it's something I've always wondered.

If people are always sweaty down there or its kept in pants all day, just seems like you couldn't have "spontaneous" sex with someone without showering first

>all this bullshit about shippin wiping and sex
>still no cure for swamp ass posted

talc powder

look up anti monkey ass

I bet your ass looks incredible though.
No homo.

Veeky Forums has always involved ass infatuation breh

(no homo)

I'm astounded that this is even a topic.
How the fuck do you justify not wiping your own ass, are you fucking 5? I don't care if I'm the last living thing on the planet, personal hygiene is a must.

what does wiping have to do with getting swamp ass

methinks you don't know what swamp ass is

Someone further up was talking about not wiping when you're home by yourself because who cares about sitting in your own shit.

But isn't swamp ass when you don't wash yourself properly and sweat too much?

You guys are all retarded. I keep a bottle of witch hazel with me and I use it with paper towels from the restroom to clean up after using regular paper to wipe.

Not only does the alcohol allow you to disinfect your crack, hole, and taint, the witch hazel keeps hemorrhoids away.

Another bonus is being able to disinfect your self if your ballsack dips in the water or you get splashes when dropping your logs.

The bottle just needs to be a dollar travel bottle from the grocery store. I like Dickinson brand plain witch hazel.

>if you don't wash yourself enough it makes you sweat

Reread what you just wrote dumbass

And to clarify, you buy the big bottle of witch hazel and fill a small travel/pocket bottle to keep with you.

I said "But isn't swamp ass when you don't wash yourself properly >>>>>AND

I wipe my ass until it bleeds and wash it out in the shower and I still get swamp ass.

Witch hazel dude.

See

You need to scrub your ass crack with a loofa to get rid of excess skin cells in your crack. Better yet, get some exfoliating gloves from Walgreens and just go at it with some soap in your gooch.

Haha. What happens when yo ass crack gets itchy?

AHH MY ASSHOLE

>Step out of the shower 100% clean
>swamp ass not even an hour later
I think its caffeine or something

No it doesn't have to do with not washing properly

I mean that doesn't help but swamp ass is caused by making your ass sweaty which then irritates inside your crack because of the friction so it gets itchy

>only dry wiping without wet wiping as well
>in 2013
>shiggaridiggaridooo

>fart a lot
>think nothing of it
>cotinuine work
>can feel it getting icky
>go to bathroom
>mfw a big ol' wet shit stain on my asshole

why the fuck does me farting make me have a shitty ass. am i not wearing the right pants? are they too tight so now the fart as no where to escape and thus creates shitty moisture?

Does anyone who suffers from chronic swamp ass ever pitty the poor souls whop have the walk up the stairs behind them, where their head is pretty much at ass level and you just know your stank rancid asshole is just wafting into their face.

were you in a walmart?

no i work in the kitchen, so its hot and i do a lot of walking around

>my bro pumps my ass full of cummies in the restroom(no homo)
>start squating
>swamp ass

every fucking time.

>white dingle berries

...

>not one mention of a squat plug.

and this is why Veeky Forums is filled with nothing by dyels.

>he doesn't have swamp ass without even moving
be glad, there's no time of the day where my ass doesn't sweat

Get Fresh balls cream.

Works all day and is testosterone friendly.

You're welcome

Cut until single digit BF,
swamp ass disapears when your fat ass is gone.

>dick 2 inches away from your asshole
Kek
Dicklets pls go

Don't shit you're self? You lost me there buddy.

How does your ball sack dip in the water? My balls don't even come close.
Do I have tiny nuts?
Do most guys have to hold their balls up out of the way?

Pic of my balls for reference.

What do you think guys?

You should stop spreading false information around you stupid smelly faggot. Talc powder only causes cancer "supposedly" in women and that's if it goes on their ovaries or some bullshit.

Men are clear.

1. If it smells, wipe better. Or scrub your asshole in the shower you're disgusting
2. Swamp ass happens when you need to take a shit, so go take a shit you filthy fuck.

Lmfao everyone look at these unclean virgins and laugh

Fucking Veeky Forums I swear

Were you in the MART when you SHART?

>if your ballsack dips in the water

What the actual fuck

American toilet water is abnormally high in the bowl

Oh wow. Imagine having a piss first and then dipping your nuts in your own piss. Fucking americans.

>taking a shit while your ass is all sweaty

asking for trouble

before fucking you usually goes somewhere private, so you tell her to wait a minute, wipe the sweat off your asshole, wash dick and ass and go for it

>those tiny ass nuts

lol sorry senpai

>holding shit back
>swamp ass
>stomach wired to get shitting urge 6-8 times a day
oh god boys this is not fun

just shove something in there and you won't have to worry about it anymore

hey thats the waitress from always sunny
never noticed that before

...

I have the same problem as OP, I was thinking about shaving but that popular copypasta always scares me
>tfw tried powder yet I still sweat through it at the gym
>tfw your ass is the part that sweats the most