>2016
>not wiping your ass with Huggies Finding Dory edition baby wipes
Do you enjoy walking around with a shit crusted asshole people with a keen sense of scent can smell?
>2016
>not wiping your ass with Huggies Finding Dory edition baby wipes
Do you enjoy walking around with a shit crusted asshole people with a keen sense of scent can smell?
>keen sense of scent
You don't know English very well.
>water
I use them when I can! I don't take them out with me or anything though
Can you flush baby wipes? Having a trash bag full of shit seems pretty nasty desu
whenever Iam at home and take a shit I just hop in the shower to clean my ass properly. I mean do a few good wipes with paper first but there is no other way to clean your ass 100%.
at work I just spit on the toilet paper and wipe like 10x times just to be sure that even the insides of my asshole are clean.
I fucking hate shitting, its the worst part of being alive.
Got to get a specific type, not all are flushable.
I bet her anus smells sweet all the time. Her posture is begging for a deep South American rimmer.
>not owning a bidet
Fucking scum
>not pouring a bit of water on a toilet paper so u r able to adjust heat and friction.
Wew lad
>I just spit on the toilet paper a few times
i chuckled
>at work I just spit on the toilet paper and wipe like 10x times
oh my
>times times
I use these. When I do the sniff test on underwear for reuse I have to go by the smell of BO and not butt butter. mission accomplished IMO.
>he doesn't wash his underwear
I threw up a little
>Reuse
Nigga why?!?!
>When I do the sniff test on underwear for reuse
dafuq?
...
>reuse
YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR UNDERWEAR EVERY SINGLE DAY AFTER YOU FUCKING SHOWERED.
fucking retard, reusing underwear.
I guess you do the same shit with socks and shirts?
>2016
>not using a bidet then dry wiping like a civilised human being
>not going to make it
Fucking this, bidet masterrace here.
Also my routine at work (Industry here, all filthy sweaty workers):
>Flush toilet
>Dip toilet paper in fresh water and wipe the seat
>Take dry paper and dry the seat with it
>Shit.exe
>Wipe with dry paper to get the most away
>Flush toilet and use fresh water to wet some toilet paper
>Wash my anus with this toilet water drenched paper
>Dry it with clean paper after this
My bidet honed princess ass will get upset if I don't clean with water.
using toilet water
You can also just get wet wipes and bring them with you to work. I have a coworker that does that
i accidental bought the nonflushable
ive got a zippy bag of used wipes in bathroom
its a bit unnerving if i think about it
>he puts toilet water on his ass hole
What the actual fuck
I know it sounds somehow disgusting. But get based and look where the water comes from. It's just fucking tapwater it does not touch shit directly.
Even "flushable" wipes cause serious damage to the environment and plumbing systems.
Either throw them out or use water and toilet paper like a normal person.
Jesus Christ user have you not heard of a garbage can fuck
Look where it sits at, a porcelain bowl where people with a mind boggling array of diseases shit, piss, and vomit. People with shit like gonorrhea discharge into.
I'm all for joocy asses but shooped asses are a sin OP.
I don't give a fuck, I take it directly from where the water comes flushing out. I would bet my ass on it there are way less bacteria and what not in that water, than on the fucking bowl you sit on or the toilet door you have to touch. (Opening and flushing with feet btw)
OK breh, if a soppy wet ass is your thing go for it
In my first world country it's compulsory to have a bidet in every bathroom
I barely wipe my ass yet you can lunch directly from my bumhole
no homo
>using wet wipes at all
>smearing a mix of fresh shit and industrial perservatives all over your hairy ass crack 2-3 times and declaring that clean
its a step above dry toilet paper but its still disgusting. americans put 10x the effort in cleaning every part of the body except that part that needs it most. revolting
Exactly I feel like I, And Muslims are the only ones who wash their ass.
MUCH QUICKER MUCH CLEANER.use to to dry
yeah, i've come to the point where i don't feel clean even after using wet wipes. i don't have a bidet, so i just use the bathroom sink. it's a pretty disgusting thought that most girls probably only wipe with toilet paper.
Bro do you not have access to lining a small trash bin (with lid) with a plastic bag and dumping your shitty wipes there? Fucking degenerate.
i make it a point to help girls out with this. when i meet a new girl i ask about her cleaning habits as soon as possible. i hope they are good but if they are not or if she refuses to answer then i dump some of my mustard bottle on her hair and her face and then hand her 4 squares of toilet paper.
by that point i hope the girl understands and if she does, i give her my taqiyah to cover the mustard hair until her cleanliness can properly be sorted. if she has not learned then she must not be allowed to defile my neighborhood any longer
>Using wet wipes
>Not using a bidet to get your asshole clean enough to eat off
I seriously hope you guys don't do this, a bidet changed my entire life
>using wet wipes
>only using a bidet
>not doing an enema after every shit
completely clean rectum master race
just wet some toilet paper
And enjoy a thousand strands of toilet paper stuck in your asshole.
>wipes cause serious damage to the environment and plumbing systems.
and toilet paper?
None are flushable, that's just marketing bs
I went to Japan and used one of those bum cleaning toilets
I wiped afterwards to dry and found someone elses pubic hair on the paper after it had been in my bum
Not so sanitary after all
Never used a bidet. Sounds weird that merely rinsing with water should get rid of poo, but I'll trust you on it.
Do this:
>clean anus with dry TP
>stack ~5 pieces of TP
>rinse under faucet, so that only the mid third gets wet
>fold dry parts over wet part and finish anus cleaning
>>Shit.exe
my fucking sides
>I fucking hate shitting, its the worst part of being alive.
I don't think more truth has ever been spoken.
god I hope youre not actually this retarded
I shower before I go to bed so that's not an issue. And since I only wear underwear if I'm at work a pair usually stays clean for 2 or 3 days.
So you shower and wear your cart scented, piss stained underwear for 2-3 days. You just went full potato.
what makes you think i wear underwear after I shower?
I'm with you on the shower thing. I should prolly start carrying pocket packets of flushables to work, though I would be a little embarassed if my coworkers found out. Perhaps I should get over that though.
Does it count if I wipe with regular TP and finish it off with a baby towel? I found that when I smear wet shit around my ass it tends to not come off as well
It's also cheaper. I do 2 or 3 squares of regular before going with a wetwipe to clean out the nooks and crannies, then a last swipe from the TP to dry everything out.
Oh cmon people can't smell your ass. Assuming you wipe until the TP is clean
If I'm alone in a bathroom, before I wash my hands I'll wet a paper towel and do a final wipe with that and toss it into the trash (this is after wiping as good as possible on the toilet of course. Should be minimal residue left.)
At work we have a whole bathroom thats inside the other bathroom so I am free to do as I please there
You'd be surprised familia. I used to think people couldn't smell my dick through my short after fapping, until a friend of mine pulled me aside and told me I smelled like dick when I was spotting him
man why people make threads like this GOTDAMN I'M ROLLING
Holy shit, others like me.
Fuck, I can't believe when people say how much they love shitting because of how relieving it is. The relief is not even worth having to sit in what will inevitably a heavily-frequented, utility-level, public toilet for around 10 minutes or more, pushing the most foul-smelling-and-consistency bodily waste out of your ass, then having to make sure you clean the mess afterwards with squares of dry tissue that vary between "sheet of loose cotton" and "sheet of parchment paper". And god help you if you're a hairy individual, or the bathroom has no windows/ventilation, or the toilet has a particularly low water level.
No one in my early high school biology class would take my question of 'if it were possible to, over generations and generations, convert regular food and cuisine into complete nutritional packages, eventually eliminating any waste from consumption, and having humans adapt atrophied and unnecessary lower digestive tract systems to the point that humans no longer needed to release solid waste and save years of overall time in a human life' seriously.
I wish bidets became commonplace in N.A.
Vigorously rubbing dry squares of tissue paper paper over our buttholes every time? No wonder so many of us get hemorrhoids.
>the person that owns these glasses of water would much rather you drink the first glass, and it is difficult to convince them to let you drink the second
Making a lot of assumptions there, my gf frequently requests that I stick it in her ass
I prefer benis in bagina and still I got asked by my former gf to penetrate her anally
It has something to do with domination and shit
Mostly with shit
Pretty sure most human beings hate defecating, so we hike about it to ease our inner conscious
>see a beautiful woman
>know that mins before she squeezed out a fist sized poop of unimaginable stench and depravity
Ok, but toilet trash cans are full of gross period blood anyway. That's why they're small and should be relined daily. May as well add shitty baby wipes.
OP I have the Finding Nemo edition wipes. I used a wipe on my asshole the first time the other week and it was quite pleasant, but not why I got them.
The real reason I got wipes is to moisturize my dong after I get out of the shower, because before I was developing white smegma-looking shit under my foreskin and I was going crazy trying to figure out what it was (STD, smega, etc). Turns out soaping my dick in the shower was drying out the skin, causing it to shed, so basically dead skin was accumulating under my foreskin throughout the day.
Luckily, a baby wipe applied to my Johnson after every shower has fixed this problem, now my knob is as shiny as ever and they all lived happily ever after. The End.
Girls don't poop famm
smell the semen or sweat
Or you could just use shampoo you mong
buy a bidet you disgusting third worlders.
Stop using liquid detergents like body wash on your skin m8. Bars of soap with real fat are way less drying on the skin.
Zumbars are made of goat milk and smell great. Tallow soaps like ivory also work fine. I'm currently using a shaving soap for showering with tallow and lannolin and my skin is softer and more hydrated than it's ever been
Toilet paper rapidly degrades. Wipes made from tougher, synthetic clothlike materials do not.
I've been known for an atomic wipe. I wipe my ass like its my job. I even pull hair out accidentally sometimes
Honestly, I've tried it before. It just feels weird on your ass because its so wet. I know some people use it though, however I see no problem with regular toilet paper. It's not like you need a lot if you're eating properly and have healthy shits (cough cough)
/thread
>clean toilet water
Clearly you're not having sex
I don't have those so I just clump three or 4 of them together and put a few drops from the sink on it, usually does the trick
Am I the only one, Veeky Forums?
i live in a 3rd world shithole and bidets are pretty much standard in every bathroom here
You guys are some nasty fucks. Just fucking take a shit before you shower. How hard is that to understand? You should be wipping as well as you can, then soap your whole body in the shower including your ass.
L O N D O N
O
N
D
O
N
>he doesn't shit before his shower every morning and never again during the day
Do you Murkans literally eat so much food that you poop 7 times a day or something? Why would you need to carry Dude Wipes with you?
You've obviously never been to Greece.
Shit stops coming out. Cum hangs around in your dick and keeps oozing out even after you've cleaned up. That's why you should always leave at least 30 minutes and a piss after fapping before showering and changing clothes.
>Needing baby wipes to clean yourself properly
Do you need pic related to wipe your ass, OP?
>mfw OP is even fatter than fatter-than-fatass and needs a toilet paper stick to wipe his enormous asshole
Pro-tip for you OP: 999,999 out of 1,000,000 of us? Our mums teach us how to clean ourselves properly, WITHOUT FUCKING BABY WIPES, by the time we're about 3 years old. BUT APPARENTLY NOT YOU.
Sucks to be you, fatass. Go live in the zoo and get the attendants to wash your asshole with a firehose. They'll probably house you right next to the hippos.
>not shaving your asshole for minimum friction and cleanup required for shits
Gays got one thing right at least.
Be sure to use a straight razor when you shave your asshole, for maximum effectiveness.
Lmao I've been doing this my whole life and have red pilled at least ten people on the wonders of baby wipes. It's amazing
Fuck, my gf doesn't want anything to do with anal
GUYS HOW WEIRD IS THIS THING THAT I DO
IF I TAKE A SHIT AND IT'S ONE OF THOSE NASTY, LIKE WET SHITS, RATHER THAN WIPING IT ALL UP AND DOWN MY ASSCRACK, INSTEAD I LITERALLY PUSH, LIKE PUSH IT BACK UP INTO MY ASS, REPEATEDLY UNTIL THE PAPER IS WHITE, INDICATING THAT I HAVE PUSHED IT ALL BACK UP INSIDE, AND THEN I WIPE AND IT'S CLEAN
Literally the best thing about having a baby is unlimited access to baby wipes
ur a retard, youre putting it by your ass not just touching with skin, skin protects you from that.
Isn't that the opposite of the intended purpose of shitting, which is shitting shit out?
Enjoy your clogged toilet shit for brains.
Oh fuck you, take two jugs, in one put toilet paper, in the other put "flushable" wipes. Stir vigorously. Then pour each into a funnel. I guarantee you the wipe funnel will clog.
Baby wiped make my asshole really wet. So when I do use baby wipes I make sure to use regular toilet paper afterwards to dry my ass. Because god dam walking around with a wet ass feels fucking weird man it doesn't even feel good just strange.
but the problem is that if its all over my asshole if i wipe it will get everywhere. i dont see why that's smart. so i just push the remnants back in so my asshole is clean before i wipe
Don't buy 1 ply paper you cheap fuck. The sink is RIGHT there.
How is this topic /fit related
OMG I THOUGHT I WAS ONLY ONE
>AND I'M MERICAN
Shitting is completely Veeky Forums related because most of it is shit.