Have you ever asked Jesus to help you lift bros? Or find that high test girl of your dreams?

>Thanking a dude who couldn't even lift a cross

I think you're a little too salty about a post on a Taiwanese meme sharing board

Have you even held gopher wood before its heavy as fugg nigga

and this is after they wipped him with spikes and beat the shit out of him after sleep depriving him for a night

most people couldn't even shoulder that weight on their bloody shoulders but Jesus power lifted that shift over a mile uphill without water

Jesus is the ultimate powerlifter

He can also bench press the fucking universe

This, Amen.
You just inspired me HARDCORE bruvva!

>Guy is nice to you
>Hate on him

THANK YOU BASED JESUS

Philippians 4:13

Jesus is Biblically giving you gains right now bruh

This is why people dislike atheists

THANK YOU BASED JESUS

Early life

Moses was a servant of a government official in Egypt who dismissed him for theft and suspected murder.[2] A large, imposing figure, he became the leader of a gang of bandits who roamed the Nile Valley spreading terror and violence.

Conversion to Christianity

On one occasion, a barking dog prevented Moses from carrying out a robbery, so he swore vengeance on the owner. Weapons in his mouth, Moses swam the river toward the owner's hut. The owner, again alerted, hid, and the frustrated Moses took some of his sheep to slaughter. Attempting to hide from local authorities, he took shelter with some monks in a colony in the desert of Wadi El Natrun, then called Sketes, near Alexandria. The dedication of their lives, as well as their peace and contentment, influenced Moses deeply. He soon gave up his old way of life, became a Christian, was baptized and joined the monastic community at Scetes.[3]

Monastic life

Moses had a rather difficult time adjusting to regular monastic discipline. His flair for adventure remained with him. Attacked by a group of robbers in his desert cell, Moses fought back, overpowered the intruders, and dragged them to the chapel where the other monks were at prayer. He told the brothers that he didn't think it Christian to hurt the robbers and asked what he should do with them. The overwhelmed robbers repented, were converted, and themselves joined the community.[4]

HOLY SHIIIIT

thank you bro, amen x
I hope you become inspired the way I have been x

damn this nigga based as fuck

Someone make a movie about this guy already

>Have you ever asked Jesus to help you lift bros?
No, I'm not retarded, I don't have imaginary friends.

Moses was zealous in all he did, but became discouraged when he concluded he was not perfect enough. Early one morning, Saint Isidore, abbot of the monastery, took Moses to the roof and together they watched the first rays of dawn come over the horizon. Isidore told Moses, "Only slowly do the rays of the sun drive away the night and usher in a new day, and thus, only slowly does one become a perfect contemplative."[2]

Moses proved to be effective as a prophetic spiritual leader. The abbot ordered the brothers to fast during a particular week. Some brothers came to Moses, and he prepared a meal for them. Neighboring monks reported to the abbot that Moses was breaking the fast. When they came to confront Moses, they changed their minds, saying "You did not keep a human commandment, but it was so that you might keep the divine commandment of hospitality." Some see in this account one of the earliest allusions to the Paschal fast, which developed at this time.

When a brother committed a fault and Moses was invited to a meeting to discuss an appropriate penance, Moses refused to attend. When he was again called to the meeting, Moses took a leaking jug filled with water and carried it on his shoulder. Another version of the story has him carrying a basket filled with sand. When he arrived at the meeting place, the others asked why he was carrying the jug. He replied, "My sins run out behind me and I do not see them, but today I am coming to judge the errors of another." On hearing this, the assembled brothers forgave the erring monk.[3]

Moses became the spiritual leader of a colony of hermits in the Western Desert. Later, he was ordained a priest.[2]

ikr?

>trying to help
>prayer
pick one

Death

At about age 75, about the year 405 AD, word came that a group of Berbers planned to attack the monastery. The brothers wanted to defend themselves, but Moses forbade it. He told them to retreat, rather than take up weapons. He and seven others remained behind and were martyred by the bandits on 24 Paoni (July 1).[3]

A different story of Abba (Father) Moses' death is related in The Paradise of the Holy Fathers:

31. Abba Poemen said: Abba Moses asked Abba Zechariah a question when he was about to die, and said unto him, "Father, is it good that we should hold our peace?" And Zechariah said unto him, "Yea, my son, hold thy peace." And at the time of his death, whilst Abba Isidore was sitting with him, Abba Moses looked up to heaven, and said, "Rejoice and be glad, O my son Zechariah, for the gates of heaven have been opened."[5]

Legacy

A modern interpretation honors Saint Moses the Black as an apostle of non-violence. His relics and major shrine are found today at the Church of the Virgin Mary in the Paromeos Monastery.[4]

>not doing reps for baphomet

This. Also:

>And they came to Jerusalem. And he entered the temple and began to drive out those who sold and those who bought in the temple, and he overturned the tables of the money-changers and the seats of those who sold pigeons. And he would not allow anyone to carry anything through the temple.

The fact that nobody stopped him when he was on his holy roid-rage shows that he was huge.

Back to /r/atheism retard.

nigga what the fuck wrong with you you need jesus nigga damn

Matthew 7:7 “Ask, and it will be given to you seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

Matthew 21:22 And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith.”

Mark 11:24 Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

John 14:13-14 Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it

THANK YOU BASED JESUS

I asked jesus to injury me in the most healthy way if i had to get injury in some weeks (was really pushing myself hard that month)

said and done, 2 days later i smashed my fingers in the leg press machine and got a week and half off from lifting

a day later my sternum got painful from the change of pressure (that day was rainy), probably would have snapped if i tried dipping

so jesus basically saved my sternum by smashing my fingers as the lesser evil for making me rest

DESIRE TO PURGE INTENSIFIES

>not doing reps for baphomet

you're right, i'm NOT doing reps for baphomet, YOU EDGELORD

I do my reps for goodness and peace and goodwill and all dat based good n holy shit motherfucker, and it's always my motherfucking set

Thank you based Jesus
you died for our gains

Fuck off beta faggot. True alphas pray to based baphomet not cuckold Jesus.

>cuckold Jesus
Get out.

>cuckold
>literally the most based motherfucker in existance

THANK YOU BASED ZYZZUS

...

oh hai there, let me help you

Luke 6
27But to those of you who will listen, I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
28bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.
29If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone takes your cloak, do not withhold your tunic as well.…

(not trying to be sarcastic, genuinely believe these words and be healed brother)

I do it for Jesus and Jezyzz

...

Im talking about the upcoming crusade

Against…

1. Commies
2. Jews
3. Liberals
4. Atheists
5. Satanists
6. Globalists
7. Feminists
8. Muslims

God always has my back.

DEUS VULT BROTHER, THE WORLD SHALL BE CLEANSED OF HEATHENS

you forgot to say no homo

>thinking bible verses mean jack shit
Praying doesn't work, it's already proven. So fuck off to /x/ you delusional faggot.

You are rotten on the inside, but God will help you.

no i never did this
I have to care about my body, not someone else/jesus.

>MFW all of the heathens in this thread

“Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few” (Matthew 7:13–14).

Reminder that if hell did exist, you'd all have a one way ticket.

>Not worshipping Narasimha.

>Not getting beast mode gains

When will you sand people learn

But seriously though, I don't understand why religions have to fight, most of them teach similar things

>based
>literally a hippie and a commie who couldn't even stop the jews from killing him even though he claimed to be the son of god
Sure m8, whatever you say.

And you think that jews and muslims also don't want to meet the messiah and cleanse the world of ungodliness?

...

he let himself be crucified to fulfil god's will, even says it in the bible that he accepted it in the garden of gethsemane?

Actually I can think of so many times in my life where prayer has actually worked o ye of little faith

Most recently prayer helped me find the girl of my dreams who I will probably propose to in a couple of months

I prayed for my cousin whom I have not spoken to in many months and not 3 minutes after I finished he called me up

Prayer brings about many mini miracles and I truly believe this

I'm gonna join a hiking group at my church soon. I'm hoping it's awesome. Thank you based Jesus

after all he cares about you and your health.

THANK YOU BASED JESUS

Narasimha best vishnu, amirite?

Fuck off to reddit you fedora-tipping retard.

So he was also abused by his own father. Sooooo based.

Muslims worship Satan and Jews are delusional and butthurt that they killed the messiah that they have become so morally corrupted

Jews are basically behind ever major degenerate movement in human history since the crucifixion

They deny Christ and therefore deny truth and become evil. Obviously not every Jew is like this but in terms of numbers they are over represented

AHAHAHAH you're LITERALLY a christfag.

I'm not Jewish, I'm not christian, believe what you want, I don't care. But thinking you're ANY smarter than some other religion because you believe in the "right god" is legit subhuman moron 80IQ tier thinking. If you ACTUALLY believe in god, or think ANY normal western adolescents believe in god in 2016, FLUSH YOURSELF.

I love how countercultures used to be pro atheist, but now that almost everyone actually IS atheist, you start ACTUALLY believing in god. Seriously? GOD? IN 2016? Lmfao. End yourself.

Fuck, I mean, I don't know. I honestly don't know. How stupid can you get? GOD? You seriously think magical sky fairy created all this, and that a virgin woman gave birth to the son of God? Lmfao. Fucking grow up and join the 21st century. "god" hasn't been relevant for 50 years. NOBODY believes in god these days. You are a fucking IDIOT for thinking ANY "white wimmin" believe in god. NO, they go to church every tenth sunday because they feel guilty over getting RAILED by chad and tyrone. You think they've EVER opened a bible in their LIVES?

LMAO.

>believes a 2000 year old zombie carpenter can hear him
>calls others retards

>Sooooo based
Yeah fuck off. You type like a Hillary Clinton supporter on Twitter. Really annoying way of typing. Fuck off with your smug shit.

And you think that Jesus will lead this crusade?
Because it sounds like genocide. Jesus is about forgiveness, redemption and salvation, as well as judgement. He even converted tax collectors and roman soldiers, and said "I came to save the sinful, not the innocent" as well as "I came to fulfill the law, not to do away with it"

I think you meant to say
"bought from every nation and tribe"
against
"Antichrist+Army" (those who don't confess and bow)

jokes on you bro I found my qt3.14 traditional Catholic wifey

stay angry

Jesus will be there for you when you grow up and stop being a man child

I struggled on a forth rep last week, so I prayed for strength while the bar was on my shoulders and the fifth rep was strangly easy.

literal children

>thinks anecdotal evidence is worth anything
Do you even think bro?

"Christfag" is a literal shill term (see pic). Get the fuck out m8.

>Muslims worship Satan and Jews are delusional and butthurt that they killed the messiah that they have become so morally corrupted

Proof? AFAIK Muslims await Jesus, and Jews expect the Messiah.
Do you really think Jesus will condemn them and throw them into hell, or will he call them to his side against the antichrist and the devil?

>has imaginary friend
>calls others children

You accept plenty of things in this life without scientific evidence

Failure to recognize the spiritual world you find yourself in currently will only cause you further suffering

Christ is the truth

lmao, so much butthurt

ok dad

Nobody on this site is actually religious. Anybody pretending is a self-loathing atheist doing it to post le fedora memes. Don't take it seriously.

>using God to help you advancing with materialistic shit

For what purpose. Also can people try being more restrained. I swear christianity attracts a shit ton of non self aware autists

>hippie
>commie
No. Jesus preached love and acceptance but he was most certainly neither of those things. In fact Jesus followed the teachings of Moses which was the inspiration and groundwork for the US constitution. Moses told of an Israel where separation of religion and state ruled and each man owned his own land where he provided for his needs and rejected his desires. That Israel would be on a hill and war would never be decided by the government as they are only there to defend, not to offend. Jesus and the rest of scripture basically says work hard for no one other than God and be humble with the work you have done. The communist manifesto was specifically designed so that everyone could be lazy pieces of shit who work minimally and don't have to pay for anything. Jesus did not preach that.

>You accept plenty of things in this life without scientific evidence
like?

>muh imaginary friend
>muh magical sky fairy
>muh santa claus
Where'd you get these arguments from? A literal fedora-neckbeard's posts on reddit?

Yeah, you'd be correct if you was on reddit. But there are actually plenty of religious people on boards like Veeky Forums (maybe because they've actually studied history, philosophy, and theology unlike you fedora-fags).

Im not even talking about the apocalypse

You cannot get into heaven if you are not a Christian

You want proof…look at what the Muslims are doing today and historically what they do

Muslims worship death and destruction

Jews are subversive and their leadership actively looks to destroy White Christian civilization

>abused by his own father

He did what was necessary

>literally a hippie and a commie
>literally
>literally

Come back when you know what the communist manifesto is.

Implying God was a bunch of butthurt Pharisees who got so anally devastated by Jesus' banter that they had him brutally murdered

>Where'd you get these arguments from? A literal fedora-neckbeard's posts on reddit?
You can make that simple comparisson by just thinking. Not that you would know much about that.

There really aren't and you know it, buddy. It's all for "fun", like pretending liking traps isn't gay.

>Communists: "Steal your neighbors shit and give it away."
>Jesus: "If you would be perfect, go, sell what you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me."

You must be mentally retarded to think these two are alike at all. Then again atheists are much more likely to be autistic.
psychologytoday.com/blog/psyched/201205/does-autism-lead-atheism

St. Moses the Black

Please help me on my quest for great gains all for the greater glory of God

No but I did ask Jesus / God to help me when I was addicted to drugs and broke. After a year of horrible depression I finally had the opportunity of a life time and I attribute it all to my faith in God. Through him all things are possible.

>he doesn't knows that jesus can break the height face and frame meme

God is good friend!

eh? When Christ returns, even the muslims and jews will confess he is the Christ (i.e. Christian) if they really believe in their scriptures...

And muslims give charity as part of their religion, and it's a big thing for them... I don't think they want death and destruction, they just want to fight the globalists, liberals, as you call them, or as muslims call them Satanists, Nazis, Illuminati...

Imagine if you were in a muslim country, and you saw all these western countries where nazi-ism and satanism was rampant, along with fucked up media indoctrination (porn) and blasphemy (atheism) everywhere in the west.... then imagine it came to the east and all the muslim countries became infected with this "modernism" (really Satanism).... wouldn't you hate the culture that spawned it?
Wouldn't you try to fight back against the illuminati who are headquartered in those countries (the west)? They want independence so they don't have to be brainwashed by western values like porn and capitalism...

And most jews are the same. They can see that Nazis and Satanists are thriving in christian, white, modern, western cultures... It's not that they hate people, they hate the evil that lives there... I guess christians are the same against muslims and jews.

If you hate everyone, that's your own deal.
But Jesus is tolerant and forgiving and will make all the nations one, under him, against evil, wherever it is

>still not knowing what the communist manifesto is
>posting inconclusive research about atheists because he can't make any other argument

I've got some bad news for you user...