Come back from gym

why would you jerk off after taking a shower?

>as one drop falls from my eye

You over dramatic beta faggot. Get yourself on reddit that place is full of faggots like you, I'm surprised you're not a tripfag.

>come back from gym
>take a shit whilst i smoke a ciggeratte
>take shower

that guy is so fucking emasculated. he cooks his wife dinner and says

>as one drop falls from my eye

can you get any gayer?

The only way he could be more gay is if he swallows a cock; he literally right on the precipice of being an absolute faggot.

Man up you absolute faggot.

man a good wank session feels great after heavy lifting. maybe smoke a bowl before if it's not too early in the day as well.

>take my dog on a walk
>beautiful day outside
>dog takes a good shit
>a nice gust of wind breezes over us
>look down at my dog as he smiles back at me
you're alright doggo

>come back from gym.
>chug brotein shake.
>save new art of my waifu from /a/.
>shitpost on Veeky Forums and /pol/ for the rest of the day.
Today is great.

I just got comfy by proxy.
gj senpai.

REM A BEST
E
M

A

B
E
S
T

>make some coffee
>go to the bedroom where my gf is lying in bed, sleeping, in just a white thong with her big ass and long, beautiful legs
>have the curtains shut and air conditioner on cold
>it's dark-ish and really chill
>mfw drinking coffee while listening to the following link in deep silence and with an angelic qt by my side
>youtube.com/watch?v=36Y_ztEW1NE&index=17

>come home from late night gym
>take bcaa's
>15 min later eat a big meal while watching a trump rally
>go to bed

...

10/10 comment from pic to music to content.

Be proud.

thanks

but it was truly a comfy moment, usually I am pumping rammstein tier spartacus(the name of the video and I guess song on youtube) which puts me hyped but that day I just happened to play that song for some reason when I was checking my playlists

>rest day yesterday
>stay home and bbq the dopest chicken with non-pleb spices
>ex messages me, says shes doing ok, I say im doing excellent. she is happy for me and it's clear shes unhappy with the new guy she is dating
> eat chicken with some rice topped with olive oil, shit is elite. start feelin' the anti-inflammatory effect kick in, feelsgoodman.jpg
>talk to other friend on the phone how our mutual friend is a mess but we're doing p good
>thicc girl messages me and I talk to her throughout the night - she wants the d next time we meet
>best friend who I plan on fugging some day starts complaining about her bf, we make fun of him
>drink a protein smoothie, get tired as shit. Lay in bed feelin awesome

>jerk off after taking a shower
>letting his smegma form as he sleeps
Please be my boyfriend. I'd clean your dick for you ever week with my tongue.

Do you talk like that in real life?

>every wednesday get home from the gym with prisma illya finished downloading

Wife at work. Home alone. Watch Horror/Exploitation movies. Play videogames. Wank. Eat Jamaican patties. Fall into satiated slumber!!!FACT!!!

MY BRAIN IS TREMBLING

no, but this is a comfy thread. op literally said "nappy". the point of comfy threads is to relax your verbiage to show youre without a care

Lel you sound like a piece of shit

not really. ex broke up with me for petty shit so I took that as an opportunity to start lifting and eating better.

all the other girls i mentioned i treat well and they talk to me because I make them laugh and cheer them up when they're stressed. i only make fun of people who are too stupid to do anything different and expect change.

Then you sound like you're putting on a facade in your other post

if you want to interrogate me in a comfy thread, you've succeeded.

i was putting on a facade to make it seem like i am alpha, as is customary on Veeky Forums.

But you are actually a raging homo like the reste of fit!! Amirite?!?!

>inhaling own shit
Fucking kek
Go outside for fucks sake :,)

Haters gonna hate. Don't pay them any attention.

Glad you're happy in life. I had a similar depression to its a wonderful life transformation. I would have never believed it back during the dark days.

Also, thanks for your service.

>cook her a delicious dinner
Stopped reading right there tbqh
And I thought you made it for a minute

>good morning love
lolfaggot.
>I work on the Navy
>on the Navy
Literal idiot, and proven homosex

>back from 2 weeks from field work
>was okay, didn't get any gains but got some good running in
>feels good just to relax with regular office hours, own food, good internet and lapsang souchong
>made some good money too
>life is bretty good

Still need a gf tho

fuck you

>get home from job making vidya
>play bloodborne and eat an evol breakfast bowl
>hit gym and destroy chest/tri day, both barbell and dumbbell bench, incline and flat
>old PR on dumbbell is now 8 rep
>come home and shitpost a bit
>make side art for different vidya
>same thing tomorrow

>cook her a delicious dinner
>cook her
>her not cooking
wtf does she do all day?

Same boat. Or ill crash at 6 am untill 10 and miss a class or someshit

>go entire day without stewing in self-hate

This shit here

>Impying that by normally breathing you don't inhale flying particles of your own shit

>Wake up early, while it's still dark outside, feel well rested
>Breakfast with a nice cup of coffee and a bowl of cinnamon oatmeal
>Bike to gym, enjoying the early morning chill and moisture
>Crush working, get that natrual high
>Go home, shower, put on comfy clothes, and stay in bed shitposting

>Got a cute girl's number today
>says she has a boyfriend after giving me her number
>ok

She probably just didn't like me much. I'm just happy I worked up the courage to get digits. This is new territory for me. May we all someday have qt gfs

>tfw I just hit 5pl8DL
bby feels too good

Do any of you have jobs?

This user is still recovering from an injury at work but even when I get back it's still a part-time job.
No real change to my gym schedule.

>go to gym
>so hungry it hurts
>drink water
>only makes it worse by feeling hungry but full at the same time
>drive to whataburger afterwards
>order a triple cheeseburger and a meal
>go home and eat it so fast I'm still hungry

>wake up
>I'm lying down in the power cage
>that was actually a lucid dream I gave myself
>immediately start squatting
>achieved muscle confusion

OP also got nice digits. You should check'em.

All the things you have mentioned have happened to me. You are not going to look back on them fondly.

>starting to get hot in the gym again as spring hits
>no longer training in easy tier cold and now getting hot

god i can't wait for summer training

>perfect day outside
>perfect mood during and after work
>hang out with mah niqqas

>go to store
>card gets rejected
>get hit by a bicycle
>walk 30min without my groceries
>drice 20min to the gym
>gym closed today

t. italian

How?

Damn that sounds comfy af.

I love waking up early, you feel so fucking refreshed.

I want to be like you...

Making vidya myself m8. Cheers

>Liking lapsang souchong
degenerate. Tastes like bacon shit.

>go to gym with gf
>PR deadlifts with gf in attendance
>go home
>throw chicken & vegis in the oven
>shower together
>turn on Brooklyn 99 & eat
>exchanging happy glances with beautiful gf
>brush teeth before having deviant sex

life. it's good, man.

Or perhaps he's wondering why someone would fap a cock before taking a shower

Well you better pick a new girl soon because rem gets her name and memories eaten and practically disappears from the show

>wake up
>make $1800 commish on one sale over phone
>lift in home gym
>crank one out
>nap
>do 4 hours of work
>allinaday

>come back from gym
>backday in effect, psyched as fuck from the preworkout
>drive home
>whip out my prep meal and the shake
>brew myself a fine espresso
>light cigarette and go to the balcony in my boxers
>watch over the miscreants on the street as they mire my morning pump
>order my usual wednesday hookers
>have a splendid threesome
>rush them out, go take a shit
>hit the shower
>go to bed for my gains nap

I enjoy this lifestyle, might keep it up.

>walk outside
>overcast

so you dont do anything else all day but work? and what about her that she can't cook for you after you come back?

what a wreck of a relationship

This is what chicks nightmares consist of. Just ask my imaginary girlfriend.

Fuck, I take 15mg of melatonin and still takes 2hrs for me too fall asleep and wake up every 2 hrs. Losing REM gains every night rip

Ciggies after a pump is orgasmic

>being this much of a buttpirate faggot

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me you little bitch?

>wake up from 4hr sleep due to insomnia
>skip breakfast cuz late for class so just get a monster
>already late for class so fuggit and go lift
>hungry as fuck but no money so eat 2 dry ramen
>smoke two ciggies
>feel dizzy
>go to class
>fail quiz
>take 4hr nap
>eat another dry ramen
>do homework but only get 50%
>sit in my dorm and shitpost till I go to bed
>take sleeping aids but still cant sleep
>have 4hrs of sleep
>repeat

I too lift ungodly weights in my lucid dreams

>>come back from gym
>>jerk off

congratulations, noob. you just lost all of your gainz

stop looking at your phones/computers before bed. also get f.lux or something for your phone

>Not Wilhelm

Never gonna make it.

what city is that

>jerking off after showering

This. Before the shower, always.

>shower at the gym
>new shampoo is fucking awesome
>come home gf rolled a joint and cooked chicken in oregano cream and bacon
>take my shoes of
>reruns of family guy

Airforce pls leave

>thinking you can still spoil me
/a/ did that long ago.
Fuck you though, you're an asshole.

I have to shower after training before anything else I sweat like crazy. But there's nothing more comfy than getting out the shower, putting my underwear and socks on and just lying on my bed

>come back from gym
>take off clothes, pose in front of gf, pretend i'm buff guy
>she smiles. rubs my arms. she falls asleep on my chest.

i might be dyel but at least she's there for me

>go to gym at 2am
>get out
>light cigarette and turn on car
>roads are clear
>6th gear almost the whole way home listening to link

youtube.com/watch?v=_pUL7u-mYqA

but the she farts and destroys the moment

this guy knows whats up

Stoner gf? U made it man

DOXILAMINE NIGGA

You wake up feeling groggy as fuck, but a normal night of sleep after months of sleeping like shit is the best thing ever

>do press day in gym before crowd gets there
>all the weights I want
>ditch headphones and just plug phone into PA system
>listening to best hits of Paul Simon cuz why the fuck not
>full gym shower for me and me alone
>take my sweet time
>clean up and then go to coffee shop with day bed lounge
>order cold roast iced coffee and read a book
>feel that post workout soreness after a literally perfect workout

I love my Monday routine and don't want to ever give it up.

>home gym
>blastin music i want
>liftin naked
>Bench finally goin up again
>gonna smoke a bowl when im done and take a bath

ayyy my nigga thanks for introducing me to this shit. late night driving and smoking feels are the best ones and these are some good tracks

>8pm, my last lab section of the day ends
>chat with students after class while I pack up
>say bye, head out back door to loading dock
>twilight bike ride home
>come home to apartment, gf Makin some shit
>take a shot of shitty plastic bottle whiskey
>go on my balcony, take 3 dabs back to back
>come inside, one more shot
>eat dinner and watch TV with gf
>play with our lil rat bros
>try to stay awake past 10:30 pm
>fail
Pic related comfy rats

I've had both. I prefer girls who don't smoke but only because of $$$. I'm with bitch rn who doesn't smoke but doesn't care if I do. She's tried it a few times over the years but she never seems to enjoy it, doesn't ask for it ever.

You made it man