What are some good opening lines for tinder?

No words just instant dick pic

Hi there! Glad to see we live in the same area. I'm looking you up, and when I find you I'm going to rape you and remove your head.

Hey do you wanna play barbies? I can be Ken and you can be the box I come in

Hey bby want sum fuk?

Can I eat your poop?

Pls respond.

>hello
works every time for me without fail

Hello there mon chéri! What a cute smile lol hehe imagine if I slit your throat and pissed in it LOL just kidding hehe

Wanna smash?

t. Chad

First class of university in 2 hours Veeky Forums, what do I do/say for first impression? Do I sit next to a QT right away?

1. Find the hottest chick in the class.
2. Sit next to her.
3. Take your pants off and start stroking your cock.

"I'm an autism"

sit next to a cute girl, talk about how you are excited and new to college and is expecting things to go, introduce yourself and talk to her like you talk to a friend, be polite and don't be afraid to make jokes about yourself when you say something stupid (just make sure you're not overjoking yourself, you'll only look insecure and dumb)

this is what I do

"hey how do you know who you look like?"

she then gets intrigued and asks who

"I don't know, I just want to get your attention"

works for me 60-70% of the time everytime

If they don't message you first, fuhgeddabatit
Common FUCKING sense

Yea do this

>3. Don't be intimidated, but I'm not a stereotypical guy. If anything, I'll be the one in the kitchen =D.

Beeeeta

>Doesnt know age old pasta
T. newfriend mcnewfaggot

i want to try this

Send them Moonman lyrics, works every time.

would wagner libretti work too?

If I were to plant my face in that booty would I grow into something special or just be a pain in your ass?

Play on what they have in their bio, simple.

If they don't have a bio then just wing it and either go the beta 'Hey beautiful' route or just go fuck it and make a joke. Once jokingly asked a girl if she wants to fuck in a McDonald's parking lot... we met up like a week later. No Mcdonald's parking lot sex though.

Hey are you a beaver?

Coz dam

(Seriously. I've been dating the most awesome girl since March this year from that line.)

I hope you eat a lot of meat so I can taste it when I eat your puss out like a Shepard's pie.

...

Nice.. and what about walking around campus?

You gotta send them that *snickers nefariously* pasta from kikebook

Kek

>I'm gonna be honest I'm a total loser. You play AoE at all?
It worked once, and that's all I need.

Will you be my complex carb?

>baghdad ass up

BENIS IN BAGINA?? :DDD

Knock knock
>who's there ?
Dewey
>Dewey who ?
DEWEY HAVE TO USE A CONDOM ??? LMAAOOOOOOOOO

the LMAAOOOOOOO part is really important, don't forget it

Knock knock
>Who goes there??
Adam
>Adam whose?
Adam the driver was an alcohol

I should unironically use some of these for keks

>Damn I wish you were my big toe so I could bang you on my coffee table

I'm using this.

> "great" instead of "awesome"

fucking ruined

checkd

how you livin baby girl

you got about 10 seconds to show me that hole cause this gorilla dick daddy's hungry and if you don't blow me right i might just shoot you

>Being too beta to make an account because you're ugly

works evertim

"I have crippling deppression and social anxiety, lets fuck"

you can even turn it around on them if their hair is dyed pink

this

fpbp