I am going to be a Mormon missionary next Wednesday. I am going to be proselyting in Columbus, Ohio. AMA

That's what I hear. I'm from AZ, so I've rarely seen snow. Not excited to freeze to death.

Are you excited to someday become a God and get your own planet if you marry?

I kind of want to stay single forever. But if I become a God I will make my own chan site.

>6969
Would your browsing of Veeky Forums be considered a sin by the church

I think if I were to intentionally browse NSFW subs that contain pornography, yes, that would be a sin. Veeky Forums is fine, I might as well be reading a history textbook.

Do you participate in pregnant Anne Frank threads

What would it take for you to apostasise and take up philosophy?

Do you believe native americans are hebrew?

God himself would have to tell me

We believe that their ancestry traces back to Europe, so yes. The Book of Mormon explains how that all came to be.

Born into it or a convert from a non-Mormon family?

What's considered a realistic "success" rate?

What kind of hostile/negative reactions do they prepare you for, particularly in regards to people angry about soliciters?

How do they decide who gets sent where?

Is your relogion LARP? It seems to me that the way you strategize to rise your numbers is too scientific for you to be genuine.
Also I've read that their is much more women than men in your religion, why would that be?
Also what's your opinion of islam?
t. muslim

Do atheists go to hell?

Expound on that first question please?

We have one of the largest womens programs in the world. It's called the Relief Society. All the women there have a tight bond and keep each other in check. This makes women feel a lot more welcome than men.

My personal opinion of Islam is that they deserve to be respected as anyone else. Right now there are terrible abominations in the middle east that are causing Muslims migrate here. I think we should welcome them with open arms. I think that Islamic terrorist groups has less to do with their beliefs and more to do with them being evil and inhumane.

Can you convince me to convert in one post?

I was born into the church, my mother being a member. My father was converted when I was 4.

Do you mean a success rate of converting others? Or a success rate of members staying in the church?

We are taught to respect everyones privacy. If someone asks not to have missionaries over anymore, we put them on a list so that they are no longer visited. We are taught to handle each scenario calmly, whether we get mugged, have angry protestors, etc.

So it starts in the church HQ. The apostles sit in a room with a big screen and a large geographical map. A picture of myself appears, and they pray about me. They all usually get a feeling of where I am supposed to go. We say it's chosen by God through them, but others can say it's random.

What are mormon girls like, in your opinion?

That's for God to decide, not me.

Read The Book of Mormon for yourself. Read it with an open heart.

Do you want them to go to hell

>So it starts in the church HQ. The apostles sit in a room with a big screen and a large geographical map.

How would your god do that if he doesn't actually exist? You are putting the cart before the horse.

Is there no other way, or have you completely hardened your heart to philosophy and truth?

answer this one op

The high is 18 on wednesday. Better bundle up. And leave me alone.

As far as dating goes: I've never dated a Mormon girl, mostly because they seem sheltered from the world. This led me to date non-members. I think that Mormon girls are beautiful and great women (and I crush on a lot of them), but it's hard to relate to someone that is very censored. And that's not my cup of tea.

As for being women: They are fantastic women. Not being biased, but they are the nicest girls I have ever met. Love them.

I kek'd

>mostly because they seem sheltered from the world
>hard to relate to someone that is very censored

Could you elaborate on this? The few I've met seem as you described them, but I don't really know any that well.

I wouldn't wish that on anybody.

Whether or not the church is true, I would still live it. My life would be down a bad path if it wasn't. If I turned philosophy, atheism, buddhism, etc. I wouldn't be the same. I do believe that you can experience happiness through other beliefs, but for me I feel like this religion puts me in my prime.

Please let me in... It's cold out...

I've only experienced Mormon women in Utah and Arizona. And I'm speaking for the men and women who are my age (ages 16 to 19). In AZ and UT the Mormon beliefs are heavily inforced in families, this leads to a lot children, both boys and girls, living a sheltered life. Once they move out and go to college, or go on a mission, the big world hits them hard. This just an observation on where I live. It may be different where you are.

You don't need to justify your blind faith, just make the admission. Or, rather, confession. It's unfortunate that you're a lost cause, but at least you're honest about it.

How would you say the mormon beliefs affect their growing up experience? Like why are they sheltered?

Sorry if you wanted more religious questions btw, I'm not a religious guy but the mormon culture is intriguing.

I'm happy to answer all non-offensive questions. I think that being sheltered varies from each parent, but for me, my growing up was very censored. I never had "the talk", everytime I asked about drugs, sex, alcohol, my mom would dodge the question. I think that a lot of Mormon parents try too hard keeping kids in a perfect world, they are worried that if they are exposed to things even a tiny bit, that they are a lost cause. This isn't all Mormon parents, just usually the UT and AZ ones. I think that it's a very innapopriate way to raise children. Because I was sheltered, I would have to reach out to friends and the internet to answer my questions. My questions would be answered contrary to my beliefs which led me and many others to nearly leave the church. Anyway, I think this is less of the cause of religion and more of parents just being protective.

I feel like you misunderstood me.

So what do you guy carry in those backpacks? Mommy's packed lunches? Issues of Super Jesus Smith's Wild Adventures? Bear spray? Gay porn? Golden tablets?

>Veeky Forums is fine, I might as well be reading a history textbook.
lol

> And that's not my cup of tea.
ALL tea isn't your cup of tea, you silly mormon.

Is Joshua Graham your spirit animal?

>ALL tea isn't your cup of tea, you silly mormon.
I was waiting for someone to say that

Just looked him up. I've played a little NV but never knew about this character. That's pretty cool.

Honest Hearts is probably my favorite DLC, even if it's really short.

Isn't posting on Veeky Forums pretty anathemic to being a Mormon?

I doubt it, but the more I look at the picture the more unsettling it gets, lol

How do you reconcile Galatians 1:8 with the BoM?

>isn't talking to beggars, lepers and drunkards pretty anathemic to being a christian?
unless there's something real specific with mormonism, most churches tend to specifically target the dregs of society to change their ways

youtube.com/watch?v=t90u1nPuNgQ

Galatians 1:8 explains that you should not accept a gospel that is contrary to the Bible. We don't believe that the BoM is contrary to the Bible. A lot of people misinterpret that scripture as, "You should not accept any other gospel, ever."

What's the deal with the Pearls of Great Price?

The way my stepdad tells me it's just a recruiting tool that has little impact on actual, practicing Mormons. He's got a combo book (like half a bible + "Doctrine and Covenants" and the Pearls thing) with his name lithographed on the cover from when he played golf on the regular with a bunch of Bishops in Southern Idaho.

>fan-fiction missionary

>Veeky Forums
>history textbook
Oh god

Can you explain the mysteries of the magic underwear to me?

Into the trash you go

The Pearl of Great Price is a re-translation of Moses and Abraham written by Joseph Smith.

The book you are talking about is called a Triple Combination (BoM, D&C, PoGP) If it has the Bible in it, then it's called a Quad.

And even though most Mormons don't care much about The Pearl of Great Price, I enjoy reading it because it's fascinating and easy to comprehend (especially Moses).

You understand missionaries are basically the real-life equivalent of chain email spammers, right? Can you people please stay out of my fucking face from now on?

>I think if I were to intentionally browse NSFW subs that contain pornography, yes, that would be a sin.
Well then enjoy a guilt free pussy pic until the mods announce their faggotry and delete my post.

No, you effectively said that under no circumstances would you ever apostasise. The one scenario you gave is literally impossible, and even if it did happen you would still actually be following your god.

The difference is that our method actually works. :)

Spam actually works too. It's a question of percentages and sheer mass of attempts.
Then again, isn't it the same with you guys?

christcucks on life support

Wasn't even trying to burn him. Just making a comment about a very misunderstood form of advertising that always intrigued me.

True, but that's how missionaries of most, if not all religions operate. Of course the majority will reject our words, but few will give us their time to listen.

How do you reconcile the obvious inconsistencies in Joseph Smith's claims? How are you able to use the Internet and still actually believe this story that has been completely refuted by archeology? How do you talk American adults into this?

What are your thoughts on Scientology?

I haven't studied Scientology like I have other religions. So I don't think much of it.

>How do you talk American adults into this?
America is a place where Creationism is taken seriously so I guess it's not that hard.

Is your's the religion with the magical underwear and the flying spaghetti monster?

>How do you reconcile the obvious inconsistencies in Joseph Smith's claims?
I personally don't see anything inconsistent with his claims. Care to give an example?

>How are you able to use the Internet and still actually believe this story that has been completely refuted by archeology?
I believe it because I read it. When I read it I feel a particular truth. When I listen to a retired archaeologist on History channel say it, I'm not equally as convinced.

>How do you talk American adults into this?
I just answer questions and teach as they allow me.

>Care to give an example?
The thing about Israelites in America.

It may sound inconsistent to you but I personally think that it's a possibility. I wouldn't rule it out, whether I was lds or not.

lol
utah man? what language speaking mission are you going to?
are you going because you want to or because of family/peer pressure?
why would you ever post about this on Veeky Forums of all places?

>utah man? what language speaking mission are you going to?
Born and raised in AZ. English

>are you going because you want to or because of family/peer pressure?
It's something I wanted to do since I was little. I can't even think of a better way of spending 2 years anyway.

>why would you ever post about this on Veeky Forums of all places?
Because of the anonymity. I could have this same topic on reddit and not get nearly as many responses and traction. On Veeky Forums, people tend to be more open, honest, and outspoken, because their identity is protected. This allows for me to have more questions to answer. Plus, I'm sure that it intrigues people to see a Mormon on Veeky Forums.

well howdy from up north in utah man
what're you doing up so late on christmas?
its dead quiet where I'm at here

I only ask why you'd post about going on a mission here because its not a very common thing on here and when they do I just imagine its a troll/roleplay sort of attempt.

>subs
0/10 not even trying

I think he illustrates pregnant Anne Frank cartoons

If you're posting on Veeky Forums you're obviously not qualified to be a Mormon missionary.

Just staying up wrapping gifts and doing santa stuff. Here is pic related proof

Salt Lake fag here. Wanna trade Christmas blowies? I'm not gay, but it's Christmas, so I'm doing it for Christ.

I only use Veeky Forums for AMA's and questions on particular subjects.

>AMA
>subs
Leave.

Don't leave. I like you OP.

O

How can I get into this, but then go to foreign countries?

rephrase?

I want to proselytize, but not in boring Ohio. How do I get sent to a foreign country?

It's not up to you, but you can increase your chances. On the application you can check a box that says, "Would you like to go foreign?" I checked this box but unfortunately I didn't go foreign. Also, if you know any other languages then you will have a higher chance of going to a country that speaks that language. If you have any mental or physical health conditions or require some kind of medical assistance, chances are they will keep you in the states for your well-being.

Describe your first sexual experience

old world blues>dead money>*POWER GAP*>honest hearts>lonesome road

What boards do you browse besides Veeky Forums?

What would your Bishop think if he knew you used it (if he doesn't already)?

How much do you know of Mormon history? Did your ancestors do anything noteworthy?

>feels>reals
How are you supposed to convince anyone like that?
Rational people will tell you to fuck off and irrational people will rationally tell you that if that is the case, then their feels, which are not the same as yours, that say that Mormonism is bullshit take precedence over any actual analysis.

>What boards do you browse besides Veeky Forums?
Veeky Forums and /news/

>What would your Bishop think if he knew you used it (if he doesn't already)?
I'm sure it's not a big deal. i have all nsfw boards blocked through a filter, and adblock to remove the ads.

>How much do you know of Mormon history? Did your ancestors do anything noteworthy?
I know a lot, but not all. I am directly related to the judge who led the Salem Witch trials.

If you knocked on my door and I told you that I'd been disfellowshipped, would that be enough to make you leave me alone?

I work in an archive in germany and we have a lot of Mormon Americans coming through who do genealogy work, they seem to be pretty alright guys
Are you into that too?