Turned 18 a couple of months ago and going for a girl with glorious personality which I have emotions for...

Turned 18 a couple of months ago and going for a girl with glorious personality which I have emotions for. Still a virgin but missed out on a few sloots because I didn't feel anything for them.

Friends are telling me to cut the bullshit and just go for the teenage pussy instead of a serious relationship. Is sex overrated? Is it as good as everyone makes it out to be? A lot of my friends became total retards after losing their virginity and say that a serious emotional relationship is a waste of time.

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>A lot of my friends became total retards after losing their virginity and say that a serious emotional relationship is a waste of time.

Because they're right. Especially at the age of 18.

Also not Veeky Forums related fuck off. Go to r9k or adv

>18
>virgin
>non fitness post on Veeky Forums
>uses the word "sloot"
stay there

Look, you're 18. Most of what you do is going to be a complete waste of time. No, you will not regret not banging sluts. What's the difference? It's not like the chemical high stays with you for all that long. But you do get those chemical highs, and if that's what you want, then go for it.

What you need to start doing is start deciding what values do YOU care about. What person do YOU want to be? It's up to you. The great thing about being a human is you can practically control how you view the world. Choose what you want. Neither is inherently better than the other. People who say relationships are a waste of time probably have parents in a failed relationship and have experienced only failures themselves. There is value to monogamous relationships. Wolves for instance mate for life, and it doesn't take half a brain to realize the evolutionary advantage of that.

tl;dr make up your own life values and stick to them

Fuck some young sloots.
You'll be glad you did when you're older.

Do whatever you want OP, nobody's the boss of you.

That said, sex is sex and it isn't overrated. Although I have found the sex is way more enjoyable and fun if it's with someone you're emotionally invested in.

>You'll be glad you did when you're older.
This
I had a 9/10 gf when i was 17 and i stayed with her until 22 and it wasnt good for me
You become dependent on her for happiness and it will fuck you up, you will be at a severe disadvantage when the relationship ends and she gets a new guy after a few days and youre unable to find a new girl for months, maybe years because you havent developed social skills and an independent mind set

Fuck as many girls as possible and learn detachment, or live with regret when youre older

OP do not listen to the people living in absolutes. There is no correct answer here. Do not be swayed by someone saying they know the right answer. Make up your own mind.

I can't make up my mind. This is a HUGE character flaw that culminated with my current situation.
I do NOT trust myself, I do not feel adequate, I do not feel that any of my feelings/opinions are mature enough to be valid and lead to success.
My closest friends are noticing this more and more and are trying to help me because I am becoming someone I am not - I almost died from alcohol poisoning last week ( I hate drinking but peer pressure), drugs, not keeping my word, half-assing every single thing I do.

Well, work on it. You're 18. You are inherently an ugly heap of character flaws. No one is expecting much out of you, and if they do they are foolish. Give yourself room to grow. But do not fall into the indolence of absolutes. Everything is both good and bad. There is no correct answer. Do not worry about regret because the only way you should look towards the path is for material to learn from.

I will say this though, learn to control your desires or else someone else will control it for you.

>a kid
>has feelings
>havent had sex

Kid, feelings get ampli-fucking-fied thanks to the magic of body pleasure.
The catchphrase is "is easy to mistake a blowjob for love".
Did i had my first pork out while in love and stuff, no i didnt and im glad it went that way.
Later on i was intoxicated with this high test qt, that strange brew of love (or the idea of) and the sex, HOLY SHIT, that was a ride and probably i wouldve done stupid shit if i havent had previous experiences involving sex because you see i knew better.

You are heading for the ride of you life

Sex is awesome.

This is hard, people have expectations of me, I have expectations of me and 90% of the time I am not even being myself. Life is not going to get any easier is it?

Typical 18 y/o

You probably dont even know who yourself is, that comes with time. Also, dont do drugs, that takes you into a really bad road. Dont be the stupid kid that gets wasted neither.

OP, I am *ahem* (clears throat) *considerably older than you are*, and have already been there-and-back on this whole subject.

Sex is great -- when you haven't had it before. But realize that we're hardwired to want to reproduce, and that's what sex is for -- it feels nice so you'll keep doing it. Objectively, intellectually, it's not the end-all, be-all of human existence. Sex loses it's novelty after a while. Then you're stuck with the reality of dealing with whoever you've developed an emotional attachment to. If there's no connection there, then sex becomes this empty, mechanical thing, worse than masturbation, because you're just using another human being, and that really doesn't feel very nice at all.

Don't go down the road of 'casual sex'. It's not worth it. It's dehumanizing -- for YOU, that is. It cheapens something that can be really nice and positive. Regret is not something you want to experience when it comes to sex; ask me, I know first hand about that (I stuck my dick in THAT? WTF was I thinking!?).

All the above being said.. at 18, don't commit yourself to someone (i.e. don't get married, don't get her pregnant, etc). It's OK to be exclusive with someone, but don't do anything that would make it permanent. At 18, you're not the same person you're going to be when you'll be 25, or 30. By the time your personality, and your life stabilizes, the kind of person you want to spend it with may be someone totally different than what you want right now. Consider that carefully.

So have fun for now, but be careful, and remember that nothing lasts forever, and that change is normal and a natural progression.

Lecture over. Hope there was something useful in my ramblings. ;-)

That's the thing though. I come off as a whole different person to some people except my closest friends. When I meditate and try to find my core values all that is left is love, understanding, empathy, need to help others.

The thing I see in this girl is that she is exactly like me but has overcome this phase (she is 1 year older) - she is outgoing, confident, kind, expressive. She is SOMEONE , I am no one yet. How do I become a character like she is?

You have to create this person constantly. There is no "you" to find. You are the actions you do. If you are not acting, you are not anything. Furthermore, you are deeply influenced by the people you are around. Your friends, your family, your teachers--hell, even your enemies--are apart of you. This is why it's important not to keep people around who negatively influence you.

Having sex with a drunken whore you barely know is essentially using a living flashlight. You'll be sorely disappointed, "that's it?"
Call me a fag or whatever but the only sex that's worth pursuing is sex with someone you love. The emotional connection and intimacy is hugely more important than the physical pleasure. It's why the whores and hedonists are never really satisfied, and sink further into depravity trying to attain more pleasure.

>Still a virgin but missed out on a few sloots because I didn't feel anything for them.

Yeah, bullcrap. You were just scared.

>How do I become a character like she is?
For starters you discard the entire idea of 'becoming like someone else' and instead embrace the idea of 'becoming who you are'; what you should aspire to is your own personal evolution as a human being. You walk your own path, not someone else's, that's how your personality evolves.

That's not 'being a fag', that's 'being an adult'. Veeky Forums is full of virgins posting about shit they've never experienced, but they try to sound like they have, kind of like this guy:

Isn't there any way I can speed up this process? I want to walk down my path, but it seems that I am subconsciously afraid what I might find out.

>but it seems that I am subconsciously afraid what I might find ou
Guess what? EVERYONE is afraid. If you're not, then you're not paying attention -- or not smart enough to be aware. We all deal with it, so will you.

No, you can't hurry this up. Just like lifting in the gym, you can only develop at the rate you can develop at -- and there's no 'mental/emotional steroids' you can take, either, to 'cheat' the process, if you were going to ask that. But, just like lifting, *consistency* in the process is key. You keep at it, and you develop. You go out and get life experiences. What I recommend is specifically challenging things that you're afraid of (i.e., 'pushing your boundaries'). Just like lifting heavier things, this forces adaptation.

I guess you guys are right.
I have noticed that most people breeze through life without seizing every opportunity to learn a life lesson. Life can CONSTANTLY teach you something, but only to those who can constantly pay attention to it.

If everyone is going through this then why aren't my peers ''growing up''? I have been criticized for declining video game sessions and pretending to be mature all of a sudden but every time I try to convey my internal state they make memes out of it. Am I with the wrong people?

>If everyone is going through this then why aren't my peers ''growing up''?
If everyone you know is doing the same routine at the gym, then why are some of them weaker than others? Everyone develops at a different rate.

Why, if everyone is doing the same routine, do some plateau at one level, and others get stronger? Because everyone has their own unique 'natty limit' to their intelligence and maturity level.

Why, if everyone is doing the same routine, some guys end up better at squats, and some end up better at bench? Because those are all different muscles. Your personality isn't a monobloc either, and different facets of it may be more developed (mature) than others.

The fact of the matter may be that you're outgrowing some of your friends. Don't let the peer pressure hold you back. If you've got something more important to you to do than play video games all day, then do that, don't let them pressure you. Of course if you have nothing more important on your agenda, having some fun isn't a bad thing either.

your friends are most likely ugly and don't have a good paying job so its normal for them to think like that because betas can't hold down a girl.

Listen bro you're 18
You don't know what you want
Your a boy and your a man
You're stuck in the middle without any plan

A baby's mind and an old man's heart
Took 18 years to get this far

Your 18 and you should like it.

youtube.com/watch?v=haYdcfZbn9k

>posting Alice Cooper lyrics
Well at least we know you're not a young guy trying to give advice to another young guy. ;-)

Kek I'm impressed and surprised someone caught this, let alone so quickly.

There's a reason for that, you know.

Because Cooper's lyrical genius is timeless?

This is now an Alice Cooper Veeky Forums thread. What lifts should Alice Cooper do to improve his stage presence? I think deadlifts are pretty hardcore rock. My vote is for deadlifts

Squats to get closer to crowd/show bulge

I just lost my v card two months ago and let me tell you sex is a lot of fun yes, but I promise you it's not even close to the deal you're making in your head. When I first had it with a condom I couldent even cum, and the girl was attractive. Don't worry about it believe me it will happen.

I'm a virgin at 25 , and I don want to go down the road of casual sex - first off, because thinking that it needs to be special lead to me wasting dozens of great opportunities with attractive women I actually had a connection with. All because I was looking for some stupid teenage romance.
Secondly, I don't want to get into a relationship with a girls simply becasue she's the first one I fucked.
Is there no middle ground? What about fucking girls you actually get along with well and turn you on without any greater commitment?

Only that this guys right.
The same happened to me, and after much personal growth I had to admit that I actually liked a lot of these girls, and was simply scared shitless at the prospect of actually having sex, therefore making up excuses in my mind not to do it.

Well, you can realise this on a rational level all you want.
But to your subconscious, sex will only ever stop being a big deal once you actually have it.

Go for the girl you love you stupid fuck. I'd cut one of my balls to find another girl that I wanna fuck and that I still wanna talk to afterwards. Fucking shit life is really shit.

We're talking about growing up and finding yourself now.
See This thread helped me a lot and I found some comfort in my current state. I almost believe that in some ways I am more mature than I think I am, but I have so much more to learn which is the great thing about life.