Tfw apathy asf

>was doing great at the gym
>no money to pay the gym and paying the bus to go there
>will only be able to get back in a month or so
>doing 30 day challange with bodyweight exercises

I really don't care anymore, I really dislike living

>shitty paying job but I have fun working there
>making the bare minimum to even survive comfortably
>friends are all excelling at their jobs or going to grad school now
>feel like a poor, unambitious child compared to them

At least my lifting and diet is extremely consistent so I'm stronger and better looking than ever. It's pretty much the only thing I have the discipline and motivation to apply myself to. I have other passions like music and writing but after work and working out I really don't feel like doing any of it. I also can't seem to put in the effort to find a job that would actually use my college degree. So I'm just sitting here, constantly broke as fuck. I still hang out with my friends but very rarely. I don't have the desire (or money) to go out and party or try to meet new people. I'm kinda comfy where I"m at but I know it's bad for me overall.

Anxiety kicked in as I walked through the crowd, rather than having a freak out I just skedaddled as fast as possible and hid for 3 hours.

Not my proudest moment.

I usually combat my apathy by going for a short walk outside. Even if it doesn't spur any desire for change, at least I burned some calories.

>tfw I fap to get into an apathetic mindset to forget ex
>tfw its not working anymore

;_;

>start upgrading highschools Chem by myself in October
>burn through 1/4 of the course in like 3 weeks
>stop working on it
>waste 5 weeks
>only have December to finish

I spent like $800 on the course too and yet it seems like I just don't care. How the fuck do I fix this Veeky Forums I want to be motivated and care about important things but I just don't and I hate it

Me but why me

what's making you feel that way user

>I also can't seem to put in the effort to find a job that would actually use my college degree.
What did you study user? How hard can it be to find a job?

u 2?

went to a party last night with abunch of new ppl. got drunker than I should of this one chick wanted to take my keys i told her to fuck off. prob shouldn't of done that

Did you end up driving drunk

Ive been here user but am now in a good place. Are you lonely? Dont put your happiness in the hands of ANYTHING external.

I actually had a complete mental breakdown about two years ago im still recovering from.

What helped me was a lot of sleeping, talking to friends, etc.

You could try free appointments on an app callled dr on demand. You can talk with psychologists that will help you.

I dont recommend antidepressants or anything though. But talking with someone that doesnt know you helps.

Do you have destructive unproductive habits? Get rid of them as that could cause you a lot of guilt that you arent doing all you could.

I just take my life one day at a time. Be greatful you are even alive.

you did the right thing user, that fucking slut could've stolen your car

>drunkenly hook up with girl I like again after a party
>talk for a while, we both really like each other
>she goes home
>she's been ignoring my texts and snaps for the past 2 days
I want to not care, but fuck this sucks

At least my OHP is increasing

Are you the OP from the thread like 2 days ago?
Don't worry too much about it, when I started going out I was pretty much the same, take it one step at a time. You're still better off than if you had stayed at home, believe me.

Stop reaching out to her. If she cares she'll return the texts

>fell in love
>we live on the other sides of world
>I must go back in 9 months

I know this feel bro. I'm still with her and it's hard, but we're both devoted.

I know, it just sucks

Marketing, copywriting, and editing. It's harder than it seems. I get lots of calls for stuff but it's pretty much always commission based telemarketing or sales disguised as "marketing". I might have to suck it up eventually and take one of those just so I can make a little more money. I know I would be miserable at that job. At least I like where I'm working now even though it's a total dead end

do you drink at all, it's a decent cure

that feeling when you finish and instantly realize it didn't work

Happened to me. Best few months of my life while we were together. After she left, she told me that it was probably better if we didn't talk. Women are a scam.

> motivation had been on a decline since 2013
> Realize the road I'm going down will only lead to more disappointment and potential pain zero so I look for help
> Starts off good, have the will improve
> Get more frustrated with my responsibilities, start questioning if and why I do anything
> Wave of apathy washes over me
> Start hating myself, random fits of anger and sadness
> Only thing that provides and happiness is being with friends

Deep down I know that if can't even be at peace with myself when I'm alone, I will never be happy

fucking sammmmmme

Maybe our body's have grown a tolerance

We need something stronger. Perhaps actual vaginas?

I have lots of pent up hate and I have scenes from my life that I play in my mind that fuel my gym sessions. It's kind of autistic but I want to bounce back and have my revenge on the world. But life keeps getting tougher and my dreams seem like they are slowly dying. I'm narcissist af and would never admit it but I genuinely hope you guys keep fighting the good fight and be careful to not injure yourselves. Sometimes I just want to end it all and have peace.

"Apathy" is a noun. You meant "apathetic".