How do I become Viking Mode Veeky Forums...

how do I become Viking Mode Veeky Forums? Feel like there's a lot of cardio involved to prepare for all the pillaging and murder...

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sciencenordic.com/dna-study-vikings-were-plagued-intestinal-parasites
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>Rowing

Is the only cardio you need. It simulates rowing across the ocean on your way to plunder

A B A B A X X

workout A:
rowing the boat 30min steady state
cutting down trees 1xF
lovemaking with your blonde strong wife 2xF

Workout B:
Pillage and murder 2x
carrying loot 3xF
cardio:
rape inferior women till failure

rowing and walking around with a weight on your back (to simulate the shield) and some bar-shaped weight in one hand (to simulate the sword)

Acquire parasites. Like, fucking horrific intestinal worms
sciencenordic.com/dna-study-vikings-were-plagued-intestinal-parasites

thanks guys, you're the best

be scandinavian

a real one

But user, scandinavians are pussies now. There's no fixing them.

Vikings mostly used axes though. After all, they were still simple farmers.

that's why i said a real one

Fuck you faggot, we are not pussies
the leaders are importing muslims and women are opting to breed with foreigners but that doesnt make the lot of us pussies
We are quickly getting outnumbered

Then stop acting like pussies and do something about it.

last time some asshole online suggested that it was "lol kill all immigrants and the government!"
We are doing something, we are voting the retards out of power along with the rest of europe and progressivly taking back our contries from those who want to destroy them

Step 1 - get a small tree branch

Step 2 - beat your kid bloody

Step 3 - ?

Step 4 - now you're Viking Veeky Forums

Pic related

Real Vikings would kill them, rape their women and enslave their children

That's exactly what it makes you. Your statement proves that.

go to a church and rape every woman you see there, then take all the valuable and run from police.

>A B A B A X X
Surely is should just be;
A X T O T H E F A C E

Im sorry. Ill see myself out.

Their women are nasty as that's why they hide them in those body bags and choose to fuck other men in the butt for pleasure sex.

By that logic america is a country filled with pussies aswell since half of the country voted for someone who wants to do the exact same thing
Almost every country in the west are pussies by this definition since most are either already run by a leftist government or have a massive voter base who is leftist

>america is a country filled with pussies aswell
Yes.

Vikings are Europe's original nigs.

It is always a temptation to an armed and agile nation
To call upon a neighbour and to say: --
"We invaded you last night--we are quite prepared to fight,
Unless you pay us cash to go away."

And that is called asking for Dane-geld,
And the people who ask it explain
That you've only to pay 'em the Dane-geld
And then you'll get rid of the Dane!

It is always a temptation for a rich and lazy nation,
To puff and look important and to say: --
"Though we know we should defeat you, we have not the time to meet you.
We will therefore pay you cash to go away."

And that is called paying the Dane-geld;
But we've proved it again and again,
That if once you have paid him the Dane-geld
You never get rid of the Dane.

It is wrong to put temptation in the path of any nation,
For fear they should succumb and go astray;
So when you are requested to pay up or be molested,
You will find it better policy to say: --

"We never pay any-one Dane-geld,
No matter how trifling the cost;
For the end of that game is oppression and shame,
And the nation that pays it is lost!"

GIBE MONI HUEHUEHUE

t. buttmad anglo-saxon peasant