Tfw you take a shit and it slides out with minimal effort

>tfw you take a shit and it slides out with minimal effort
>tfw you take a glorious shit and you only have to wipe twice
>tfw you take a shit that only lasts 90 seconds including wipe time because it came out so easy

psyllium husk is worth every penny

Good feels brah

>When you cum a fuckton but you can easily clean your dick because you drank water
>When you fap a fuckton of times like a horny bunny but still don't have a urine infection that hurts your benis (:DDD)

No psyllium in my shit, just beans.

>tfw you used to fap all the time when you were a teenager but you can't manage more than three times a week now that you're 24

Don't get me wrong, I'm foreveralone, but I think I fapped myself into some ED so I need a couple days to recover so I can get it up again and actually cum instead of having a sad premature ejac.

Watch less porn and use imagination then

Just think about your favorite fetishes and things related so you can have a hardon and masturbate more
I masturbate around 2 times/day and i'm 19 though, but would do more if i was living alone

I feel you bro. Been eating hella fiber, them quick clean poops are great. I just sit there for a few more minutes playing a game because i'm on company time

I fucking wish I could fap less. I need to fap at least 2 times a day in addition to daily sex otherwise I can't fucking think. It's been this way since I was 12. If my life were a pie chart probably the largest slice after sleeping would be 'lewd things'. I feel like I'm wasting my life.

>has sex daily with girls for a decade

man, i feel so bad for you, must be so hard.

That's a recent development. Used to fap 3 times a day instead. Actually put it all into a spreadsheet after keeping track over 100 days. Average was 3.79, I had all kinds of stats on my fap habits.

>tfw you can feel a difficult shit working its way out but it's slow and you can't do anything but wait so you just phonepost on Veeky Forums in the mean time
Guess where I am

>wiping 20 times before all the shit is removed

>disgusting protein shit that stinks half the house up and leaves an awful mess in your ass
>wipe ten times until you start finding blood on the toilet paper
>jump in the shower to clean the poop out of your ass thirty minutes later

Hold me.

post chart, I want to see

>have one of those long soft shits
>it cuts off
>a little tiny piece is left hanging
>can't wipe because it will wipe all over my ass
>have to basically grab it off with the toilet paper
>but since it was soft the residue is already left on my asshole
>have to literally push it with the paper back up into my ass to prevent it from wiping all over
>still have to wipe like 10 times but finally i'm clean

>few hours later ass starts itching
>go back to toilet
>wipe
>brown

...

tfw constipated as fuck

>very little body hair but have hairy asshole
>have the issues most guys with hairy assholes have, like wiping peanut butter through shag carpet
>the paper on asshole is irritating due to hair

>attempt to shave/trim asshole hair to prevent it

DON'T DO IT DON'T DO IT SHAVING ASSHOLE HAIR IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO I DON'T KNOW HOW OR WHY GIRLS DO IT OR HOW THEY TOLERATE IT

I got curious once and shaved my pubes. Worst itching of my life.

i trim my pubes. as in i go with the grain so it doesnt shave bare, just thin like a haircut

i honestly don't understand how guys can shave completely clean like some girls do, and I also don't get how and why girls shave compeltely clean and don't get irriated afterwards

>shaving your asshole
Chafing is a big problem when the stubble comes, but while it's shaven it's a beautiful thing
Trim your asshole with scissors to avoid dingleberries, the only thing you shave are your balls and chest

90 fucking seconds??
Dude my shits lasts less than a fucking piss, how much shit does come out of your asshole?
i never get why people spend so much time sitting on the toilet.

Goddam Piccolo dick.

eventually your skin gets used to it
also exfoliation until it hurts and then a little more

has anyone ever found a solution to the never ending wipe?

pls respond I poop in twenty seconds but wipe for twenty years

What do you eat?

a lot of carbs
not a lot of protein

that's probably my problem right there

That is your problem, especially if there's also a lot of fat in your diet with those carbs.

itchy ass? use wet wipes
shit works fucking WONDERS

dude you need fiber, a good amount of fiber

fruits, oats, wheat (double fiber even) bread, etc

as long as your carbs have fiber. if its just bleached pasta that is no good

hell even get some bran cereal, not raisin bran but like legit bran when the cereal looks like just pieces of sticks and dirt. it has like 60+% DV of fiber. you need it

ordering whey as we speak

eating mostly carbs has given me soft-serve poops, don't think fiber is my problem