/fph/

Fat People Hate

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=jWvDIWQdzjA&t=0s
youtube.com/watch?v=374U7z4s9fM
youtube.com/watch?v=QQyEVMuCpnc
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

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is that her butt? the fuck's going on there?

I don't know. The anatomical anomalies of the morbidly obese are both highly variable and highly perplexing.

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Yeah it is. She sits in her chair all day, eventually her body starts to mold to it. Happens all the time in fatties.

>being able to stand is being """""""healthy""""""" to landwhales

This post made me laugh more than it should have. Pretty sure thats her back fat/love handles though.

> she can walk

H E A L T H Y
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L
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H
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>be 11 years old mums side of the family is coming to stay for a week
>before they arrive mum warns little brother(6) not to say anything rude while they are here
>extended family arrives, mums brother walks in first carrying 2 suitcases.
>mums brother is in good shape, he's ex army and served with my dad (How he was introduced to mum)
>then in waddles the rest of the family
>aunt is huge probably weighs twice what my dad weighed and he was 6'3 and 230lbs back in those days
>3 cousins, 1 is really skinny, the other is a smaller version of his mum and girl cousin is just like a regular 11 year old girl
>skinny cousin is a year older than me and fat cousin is 14, they are staying in my room for the duration of their stay.
>day progresses and it's bedtime, fatty claims my bed because he needs it because he has a bad back apparently, I go to argue but mum gives me the look so I just keep my mouth shut and sleep in a sleeping bag
>next morning odd smell but just assume its fattys BO
>day goes by sitting in living room
>start discussing what we should do the next day, dad is suggesting things like hiking, adventure walks, swimming, things like that, aunt scoffs at all of them and is genuinely offended that my dad would suggest things like that.
>aunt actually said to my uncle "Why did you let that man marry your sister" uncle just sits in his chair looking depressed with his head in his hands sighing every so often
>dad is quite annoyed at this point, so asks what she wants to do, she said we were going to have a movie day and order takeout
>get sent to bed with all the other kids in the house, big argument erupts between my mum and aunt
>manage to fall asleep but wake up in middle of the night because of horrid stench, fatty must be farting in his sleep
>take sleeping bag and go sleep in twin sisters room

>next morning me my dad, uncle, all 3 sisters, little brother, skinny cousin, girl cousin and mum all go out for a hike and then wenton an adventure trail like the one in the tree tops.
>arrive home at 8pm had agreed with aunt that we'd all get takeout for dinner
>walk in front door, house reeks little brother feels sick
>investigate the smell, they had blocked 3 of our toilets with shit that didn't look like it could come from a human
>girl cousin starts crying from embarrassment, uncle is fuming and skinny cousin looks like he wants to cry
>manage to keep down food and immediately go to bed in sisters room
>next day playing rugby with skinny cousin, twin sis and both dads
>after game skinny starts talking to me asking why I don't get out of breath (did cross country when I was younger)
>start talking to skinny about cross country after I leave to get a drink,fatty comes over and starts picking on skinny
>from kitchen window see fatty punch skinny to the ground and start kicking him(skinny had called him a fat loser apparently)
>I ran out from kitchen and punched fatty in the cheek(softest thing I've ever felt in my life)
>fatty starts crying, a bit like cartman in south park, despite only receiving a fairly week punch from a kid 3 years younger than him

cont

>don't get in much trouble but aunt scowls at me all of dinner until
>based little brother who has been on his best behaviour all week is just to curious about these supposed humans and just turns to my aunt and asks in his innocent little 6 year old voice, "Why are you that big?"
>aunt loses her shit starts screaming at my little brother swearing at him and everything through a handful of her food(pasta bake) at him (which missed but the intent was there)
>dad goes full Sgt Major mode puts on the voice and everything. Scolds my aunt fiercely for shouting at a 6 year old like that. Aunt just sits opened mouthed staring at my dad then turns to uncle and asks if he's gonna let my dad speak to her like that to which uncle just replied yes.
>all kids go to bed
>next morning they all leave
>inspect room which smells fowl
>find shit encrusted mattress thanks to fatty
>my room needs new everything
>year later uncle finaly divorces aunt
>1 year later gets custody of the kids
>they move in with us
>fatty is 16 now and still a useless shithead
>other 2 are fine skinny actually ended up surpassing me at cross country when I switched my focus to rugby and swimming
>after 2 years with us and my dads strict rule fatty became less fatty but still a shithead
>skinny became a bro and joined the RAF

So yea fat people were the reason for the worst week of my childhood.

I love a happy ending

really makes u ponder

youtube.com/watch?v=jWvDIWQdzjA&t=0s

>men would catcall me in my mobility scooter

THIS IS SATIRE

L A D S
A
D
S

This thread on /adv/ is an absolute goldmine

The delusion is off the charts

When I was a fatty I wasn't that much of an ingrate thankfully.

After my dad was thrown in prison his toxic influence stopped and I lost the weight.

Great story user.

>Astronomical masses collide.

Black hole incoming.

Do you folks think there is a correlation between obesity and IQ?

I have noticed that most fat people are pretty stupid. That's anecdotal.

When did body positivity come to 4chins?

It's just delusion. Cognitive dissonance.

Fattie train of thought:
>I'm fat. (Fact).
>Therefore, fat should be good, else I wouldn't be fat. (Delusion).
"Being fat is bad"
>No, if fat was bad, I wouldn't be fat.
or
>Maybe, but I am fat because I can't not be fat. (Defense mechanism)

This thread legit made me go for a run at 11pm at night. I want to make it. I want it soo bad.

>tfw no fatty genderfluid xirlfriend

We're all gonna make it.

Legitimately made me laugh.

>Do you folks think there is a correlation between obesity and IQ?
IQ alone? Probably a small correlation as people with higher IQ's are going to sift through more information than others so they might have a better chance at learning about fitness and therefore more knowledgeable about the benefits.

I'd expect wealth to have a much stronger correlation, and wealth affects IQ as well so you'd definitely see that there are more fit people among high IQ only because wealth affects both.

Get it? Wealthy people will have higher IQ AND be more fit, so then when you look at IQ you see more fit people, but the wealth was really what determined who is fit or not.

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why.
just why.

There objectively is a correlation, but it's possible that they're both caused by a third factor (e.g. wealth)

I remember I used to this she was inhumanly big
Now I see dozens of them every time I go to Walmart

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After so many bad endings, a happy one is always good to see.

Your Dad's alpha as fuck

>at the grocery store
>massive whale on a scooter
>damn that one fatass bitch
>whistle at the sheer size of her
>tfw she thinks I cat called her
>she gurgles something about the patriarchy and scoots away

I've read enough of these threads, guess I should contribute one of mine

pt 1/2

>be me, 22, bretty fit 6' even 190lb
>get drunk as shit, hook up with random 6/10
>this isn't about her
>wind up breaking my drunk ass dick
>blood drains to my scrotum, gets infected
>two weeks off work, lortab, and vidya since it hurts so bad to stand
>need to go grocery shopping, too much of a jew to give roommate money, have him take me with
>go to Wal-Mart, he drops me off at the front
>hadn't taken painkillers, hurts so damn bad to stand
>begin limping in looking for a place to sit
>find mobility scooter
>hop in, reach around and unplug, check battery
>100% fuckyeah.png
>pull out, manage to grab a cart, go to wait for my roommate to get in (we were in my truck, made him park it at the far end of the lot)
>somebody left a tarp covered pallet of fertilizer from the garden center right in my way
>"EXCUSE ME"
>realize there is a bag of McDonald's attached to the pallet
>holyshititsalive
>"I NEED THAT CART"
>using caps because the pallet monster was that loud
>Sorry, I do too, and I was here first, so...
>"GIBE ME DAT CART"
>Sorry ma'am, you're gonna have to wait for someone else to finish
>Fertilizer beast grabs the cart by the basket and tries to tip it and me over
>Instinctively put out a foot to catch myself
>fresh wave of pain shoots through me
>slam my weight to the opposite side, forcing the cart back down
>yelling now "What the fuck is wrong with you, you crazy bitch"
>as if on cue, the planet's binary moon orbits within view. The door greeter also apparently called a CSM over. My roommate also just walked in
>have both pallet monsters screaming at me to get up and leave, how dare I talk to her mother like that, etc
>oh shit, I'm about to be on Cops (and probably World's Dumbest) over a scooter
>roomie's just standing there, dumbfounded by what he is witnessing

cont'd

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>Great American Romance.jpg

continue, I'm kekn

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How can someone sound so smart yet be so dumb?

pt 2/2

>CSM breaks everything up, quiets the beasts, asks what the problem is
>pain has subsided, I'm calmer
>"HE won't get out of MY cart"
>"Sir, you need to let this woman-"
>Whoa bud, slow your roll, I was here first
>"I was gonna get it, I NEED that CART"
>moon pipes up
>"My mom has a medical condition and has to have that cart"
>brief moment of muh condishun by both of them
>this is 2006, there is no Veeky Forums, or fph, so not really appreciating the humor
>just noticing that the pallet monster has been standing there screaming longer than I'm currently able to stand
>"Sir, unless you have a legitimate need for the scooter, I'm going to ask that you let this woman use it"
>Oh I do
>Moon: "Bullshit, there's nothing wrong with you"
>CSM looks at me expectantly
>I have scrotal sepsis secondary to scrotal trauma caused by a ruptured corpus cavernosum
>or something like that... pretty much just repeated the technical jargon the doctor wrote on my paperwork
>wuts all around
>Looking right into the CSM's eyes, tell him in english, "I broke my dick and it caused an infection. I can't stand without being in severe pain"
>CSM: "Oh....um....sorry about the trouble, sir. Ma'am, I'm sorry but-"
>Pallet Monster: "That's bullshit! I've never heard of that! He needs to GIVE ME MY CART"
>Me: Yeah, I'm not surprised. It mostly happens during sex
>Roommate finally chips in as he walks up and grabs the cart I had pulled out
>"Yeah, I kinda get the feeling that's not something you know a lot about"
>full scale planet quake, the likes of which makes Mars seem like a pretty chill place
>fatties rage

cont'd

youtube.com/watch?v=374U7z4s9fM

pt 3/2

>Roomie tells me let's go
>fatties grab the cart again
>CSM has flipped script at this point, tells the fatties plainly and loudly and they will wait, and that he will call the cops if they continue to assault other customers
>Pallet monster continues to scream and threaten on her way to the bench. Gonna call the home office and report them, gonna make me pay, never gonna shop here again, etc etc
>Been sweating for a while at this point
>Sits and opens her McDonalds bag, pulls out a burger
>While eating it, digs out a napkin to staunch the flow of sweat
>It dawns on me
>This bitch got food to eat while she shopped
>And that's not a small bag
>She was probably gonna get more when she was done
>She probably ate before arriving
>Me and roommate did our shopping
>the binary system was still sitting there while we checked out and paid, giving us glares
>the McDonalds bag was gone
>take the mobility scooter to the far end of the parking lot where my truck is, leave it there
>no fucks given

end

It occured to me later that it's funny that if you're anywhere near Veeky Forums looking, you have to explicitly justify why you may need some aid or another, but if you're fat you don't even have to screech 'muh condishun'

Is that fat privilege?

how can someone so """""""""""""""""smart""""""""""""""""" be willingly blind to something so simple ?

Narcissistic personality disorder is how.

The guy is so deep in it that he gathered his own little cult, and regularly scams the shit out of them.
His latest scam was claiming that if they don't contribute to AI research (by donating to him), future AI overlords will create a perfect copy of them to torture, and you wouldn't want that on your conscience, would you? ;^)

mirin calves

Fucking dammit I give up.

I've been watching Boogie for fucking years.

He's still 'proud' of the 10lbs he lost like 5 years ago, jesus fuck this guy needs to get it the fuck together.

I don't understand. I have taken three years of anatomy. What am I looking at, exactly? Someone please... I'm lost and scared.

No i think it's her lower back fat hanging over her underwear.

Dirty Bulks done dirt cheap, my friend.

He was not the creator of the basilisk, and is so spergy about it that he tried to scrub all talk of it from his various sites.

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but how?

I'm aware of the basilisk concept, but where he comes in is where he tried to sell it as a certainty that could only be averted by donating to him.

Given that the idea states that the hypothetical overlord wouldn't target people that helped AI research, it's absurd to think they'd be targets unless the only way it viewed help was via monetary aid.
Also, his "research" facilities put out less papers than fucking diploma mills, so any AI worth the name would realise he's a worthless parasite and torture the shit out of his double.

child abuse

porking up children is child abuse. yelling and screaming and berating children, as fatties are wont to do, is child abuse.

It looks like fucking meat pants. Dear god. I can't fucking look at this.

youtube.com/watch?v=QQyEVMuCpnc

I don't know why this triggered me so hard, but it did

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THAT FUCKING HORSE LOOKS. TIPSY WTF

Can someone cap this for posterity? I like a good ending.

This is so fucking depressing.

>Is that fat privilege?

Yes. Now cap your story, it's good and I'm lazy.

>Broken dick.

Fuggin kek, you're not done story time until you tell us how you managed that. I was really hoping the story would end with you having to show them your fucked up pic related ballsack, but i'll take what i can get

borderline anim cruelty

Okay sports fans. Let's take a brief moment and think about the 92.4lbs Chinese woman that made the pair of "underwear" being worn in this video.

>I mean that their theoretical and pragmatic efficacy is not subject to revocation by quirks of metabolic disprivilege.
Why the hell would you describe such simple ideas with this type of language, if not to feign intelligence? Disprivilage isn't even a fucking word.

>borderline
More like full on. Mother fuckers.

>be skeleton
>love eating pizza, burgere, tacos, cakes
>mom is fatty
>keeps buying all these random fruits and shit
>still can't lose weight
>yells at me for not wanting to replace pizza with fruits
Why do fatties need to ruin my eating environment
Doesn't matter who pays for it the fridge can't hold pizza and shitty fruits

there, capped my own story

More story time inc

I think I know that person. Is that Del?

I want to rip her off of that poor animal.
Makin me rage a bit.

Why does it look like she's giving someone a piggyback ride under the dress?

Here goes:

>be me, 22
>just got off work, weekend ahead, go to local hotel bar, since I know the staff there
>meet girl, 6/10
>could tell she used to be hot, but early alcoholism was starting to take it's toll
>talk, get drunk
>6/10 turns into 9/10itsokay.ign
>go back to my place
>proceed to fuck like we haven't been laid in years
>have the good kind of whiskey dick where I get hard but can't get off, pornstar mode activated
>mentioning again that I'm shitfaced
>somewhere around an hour in, accidentally pull out too much, thrust back in misses
>notice a sharp pain
>notthatbad.gif
>keep fucking
>little later, notice I'm starting to get soft
>mental gymnastics activated, trying as hard as I can, almost there
>finally get off, almost immediately go flacid
>go to bathroom to clean up while she's recovering
>notice my scrotum is yuuuge
>like the size of a grapefruit
>think to myself that I gotta quit drinking so much
>lay down with 9/10

contd

It's the thick meme fags that don't know what thick means paired with wimmin since /adv/ has like the second or third highest female userbase on this site.

Being skinny is no excuse to eat like a slob.

contd

>wake up with 6/10
>sack is still swollen
>was really hoping that I was just drunk and imagined it
>take her back to her car
>go back home
>decide I should probably see a doctor
>can only wear scrub pants at this point
>go, embarrassed as I'm telling the 7/10 receptionist the nature of my visit
>see doctor, show him what's going on
>he calls another doctor in
>they tell me that I ruptured one of the major blood vessels in my dick from that missed thrust (the corpus cavernosum)
>talking amongst themselves
>"patient presents with severe scrotal swelling, as well minor to moderate penile swelling; likely from reported penile trauma"
>look down
>Hey doc, there's no penile swelling, that's what it normally looks like
>"Really?" cocked eyebrow
>feel like a boss for a brief moment until I remember where I am and what I'm there for
>tell me I should have gone to the ER as soon as I noticed, they would have drained all the blood that pooled up in my scrotum
>tell me there's nothing to do now except wait for it to heal, and wear tight underwear
>tells me I better hope I don't get an infection from all the blood pooled up in my scrotum
>sends me home with a note for a few days off work

end of that part
should I cont with the infection, or are you happy?

and yeah I was ready to whip it all out for them if they kept trying to call bullshit. I'd take the arrest, then sue for the ordeal just so Wal-Mart can pay me an out of court settlement

I love this story so much I read it every time.

Continue. Only reason why I'm lurking

I would watch this movie with friends

alright, contd

>ask doc about potential infection
>he explains how I have a volume of blood pooled up somewhere it's not supposed to be, and how it's a race at this point as to whether my body will reabsorb the blood before sepsis sets in
>go home
>day later wake up, get out of bed
>nothing but pain
>hard spot in my scrotum
>not on, in
>back to the doctor, limping
>same 7/10 receptionist
>doesn't even ask the nature of my visit this time
>get referred to an urologist
>they decide to do an urethra retrograde x-ray

I don't know if you ever heard of those, but motherfucker...
>insert catheter
>inflate at the end of my urethra (rather than in the bladder
>fill urethra and bladder with dye
>x-ray
>felt like my insides were boiling
>second time in my life I ever made a sound during a medical procedure
>nurse had a bucket ready for when they pulled the catheter out
>still pissed on the table
>doc let me know that it was gonna REALLY hurt to pee for the next day or so
>results are in, no leaks
>go back to primary
>primary wants a urine sample
>thankfully he changes his mind when I explain what happened with the urologist
>get prescribed antibiotics and painkillers
>get leave from work extended to two weeks
>still worth it as I can now tell people I broke my dick

short work story inc

>call in to work to let them know I'm gonna be out for two weeks
>already took the first dose of painkillers (lortab 10mg)
>high as fuck
>tell the shift coordinator in detail what happened to me
>spend the next tell fielding calls from coworkers since coordinator told fucking everybody at the facility

bonus:
>get back to work
>coworkers ask if my shit still works
>I say yeah but it still hurts like hell if I get hard
>spend the next week or so with hot af coworkers trying to get me hard
>lapdances, flashes, etc
>betterthanexpected

Its having to compensate for the weight shifting due to her fat, try to imagine walking while hauling a huge sack of water on your shoulders

Ayyyeee

That's the ending I was hoping for
10/10 would read again

Of all the words fat people use to pretend they're not disgusting, fluffy is the worst.

Her body looks like it is trying to be a fluid

this has to be a troll. my sides are in orbit nonetheless

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haha good lad

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Veeky Forums I'm looking for an image of something along the lines of a "Dear Abby" where a fat woman is mad that all your her former fat friends were no longer loud. It's always being posted in these threads. Pls help.

My alcoholic grandpa can stand too, but he isn't healthy
Where do fat people pull this shit from?

>metabolic disprivilege

lel

I was just about to post this

Narcissist probably. I would know, I'm the son of one.

Smartest person I know (of course I would have my narcissistic dad idolatrized), but he often gets that intelligence of his to justify the most stupid shit imaginable.

Intelligence is not a cure to all your problems.

That's not cognitive dissonance.

t. Cognitive linguist.

This makes me sad. This is what you would hear if you could hear a jealou pack of dogs at the park, or what a bunch of 5 year olds would say.

These people are little more than talking animals.

>cat
>fat
wat