This is an emergency what's the fastest way to burn 500 calories indoors?

This is an emergency what's the fastest way to burn 500 calories indoors?

chop off a finger, the blood loss will burn 500 kcal.

This

I use this after cheat meals, if you are not a manlet this will burn easily more than 500 kcal. Downsides are that you have only 20 fingers and toes and it may harm your gains if you dont use straps in gym.

already done this 20 times

Fasting + burn calories

Fap

Lie down on the floor and just flail for a couple hours

Just get real fucking flaily. You'll start pumping blood and burn them calories in no time

500mg of DNP up the shit pipe

No joke, go donate blood

What this guy says. Waiting for the webm.

Exercise bike for an hour, easy peasy.

Down the road, not across the street

It's easy no?

JUMP ROPE

Who is this semen demon?

Donate plasma. 600+ cals burned and they pay you.

Not eating them.

Shanaynay pudley

>donate
>they pay you

5 miles on treadmill.

burpees in a freezer while jacking off naked

how are you typing, bro?

with my arse

Flex every controllable muscle in your body until failure, then repeat

Don't eat 1xf

If you're not in a gym do like 10 sets of mountain climbers for 1 minute+ each

Jump rope

do you have stairs? even a few can be used to boxjump or just run up and down at 1000kcal per hour rate.

Is that a young claire abbott?

Donate a pint of blood.

What did you do out of interest?
Was it the GOEAD?

Have sex

Go outside without clothes and run.
The colder the better.
A lot of your energy is used to upkeep your heat.
Abuse that.

I didn't even bother to check OPs picture, but I agree with this.

Just go back in time and don't eat the thing. That way you'll already be in the past, so the whole process will literally take a negative amount of time.

You have a stairway?
>An average person burns 1kcal per 20 steps.
>10 000 steps = 500 kcal
GO NOW!