So Veeky Forumsizens, how about getting a morning stretching routine? Give me something that is good and actually works

This is correct.

The most fashionable aspect of modern fitness is the newly-rechristened “mobility.” Same thing as “flexibility,” except that it sounds more Californian. And here I go again, pooping on the most popular thing in the gym. It is a part of every trendy approach to fitness in existence, from CrossFit and “functional training” to Pilates and yoga. In fact, Pilates and yoga are mobility/flexibility/stretching, and that's about all.

It has been assumed by almost everybody for the past 40 years that every workout should begin with the physical preparation known as “stretching.” Stretching is an attempt to increase the range of motion (ROM) around a joint, like the knee, hip, ankle, shoulder, elbow, or around a group of joints like the spinal column. The common method is to force the joint into a position of tolerable discomfort and hold it there for a while, thus hopefully increasing the ROM.

The assumption is always that your current ROM needs to be increased. Here are some Facts, cheerfully provided without citations, so that you can look them up if you want to.

1. Hypermobility is a medical condition – a pathology, in fact – that often involves defects in the proteins that form the ligaments, the connective tissues that connect the bones to each other at the joints. The problem with being too flexible is that it results in unstable joints, which can assume positions they are not anatomically designed to occupy. A subsequently injured joint is not healthy: it is injured. This is not good. And here you are, trying to become hypermobile.

2. Tendons and ligaments do not “stretch out.” You cannot make them longer, and it would not improve their function if you could. Their function is to transmit force, like a chain or a cable; in the case of tendons, which connect muscles to bones, the force of muscular contraction is transmitted to the bone it's attached to, thus moving the bone.

3. Since neither ligaments or tendons are designed to stretch, an increase in flexibility primarily involves the muscles that control the position of the skeletal components they operate. Sometimes, but not that often, the muscles behave in a way that requires you to teach them to lengthen more readily. And the best way to do this is with the aforementioned Full Range of Motion Barbell Exercise. Since full ROM is, by definition, all you need to do, anything beyond that is either a simple waste of time, or a counterproductive waste of time.

4. Stretching does nothing to a.) prevent soreness, b.) alleviate soreness, c.) or improve strength or any other measure of fitness. In fact, the vast majority of the studies done on stretching not only support this summary, but also indicate that stretching prior to either training or performance produces a significant decrease in power production. That's right: tighter muscles can contract harder and faster, and this has an obvious application in performance athletics.

Depends.. Do you want to bulk up or just get toned?

get on of those youtube pilates/yoga bunny videos and do one of them

huh that's a good range. I can't even get that low with that length. My hip clicks before I even get that low

Retarded.

i meant extending the foot outward can only add stretching to the groin, not really anything wrong.

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You're an idiot
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You're an idiot

In conclusion: You're an idiot. You should never give anyone fitness advice of any kind, and no one should ever listen to a single word you say. In fact you should be banned from all gyms since you are full of shit and will reduce the average IQ of the room by at least 10% just by walking in. Please kill yourself, it's for the best.

Absolutely moronic.

Stretching is not productive and potentially dangerous if you do it with no prior exercise.
Do it after a run or after doing some jump rope if you really want to do it in the morning.

>stretching after waking up

nope always warm up first. You also don't need to stretch if all you do is lift...you're never throwing your body unless you do powerlifting.

The only important stretch that everyone needs is if you can do heel to butt without shoes to provide knee flexion.

startingstrength.com/article/the-3-most-effective-ways-to-waste-time-in-the-gym
Take it up with the Rip, boys.

Brutal