You may have one (1) two-hour workout with one of these men...

You may have one (1) two-hour workout with one of these men. They will offer you advice and help you learn how to do anything fit-related. Who do you choose, and why?

Obviously the only answer is Scooby. Providing he doesn't try to bum me in the locker room afterwards anyway. I'm ugly so I'm probably safe though.

Scooby. He is the only healthy person there and I have a passion for long distance cardio.

Rippletit is strong but looks like shit.

Zyzz looked great but he took every shortcut he could and died.

apologize

Mehdi > Rip

Prove me wrong.

...

Rip of course.

Scooby is a shit tier bodybuilder, who offers "dad" advice.
Zyzz was a roid monkey.
Rip though he's fat as a fuck, is a bright guy. Though I'd rather pick Jordan Fergenbaum from Barbellmedicine

mark rippletoe

>absolutely no accomplishments as an "athlete"
>not a single person he has coached has ever accomplished anything in powerlifting/bodybuilding/etc

The only thing rippletits can teach anyone past the first few weeks of lifting is how to be obese.

Would anyone not pick Scooby? Seriously?

He's the only one who seems chill. Zyzz would be annoying and needy and Rippetoe seems like one of those asshole coaches who barks at you.

zyzz just because hes an intense guy

I would probably learn most things about life from scooby, also he is a nice person but with Rippetoe I would finally be able to squat.

I'd go with Scooby or Rip, because theyre not dead.

Scooby looks better than 99% of roiders on nothing but trt. Hes also old and does exetremely intense cardio.

>between a roided dead guy, a strength coach and a gay grandpa who looks funny, who would you rather be coached by?

>absolutely no accomplishments as an "athlete"
and the other two do...?

Scooby is actually healthy and has better life advice than rippletoad and le sauna man.

Zyzz, because it would probably be super fun to lift and talk with him. Of course the other two have far more knowledge but I doubt it would be some life changing stuff we haven't all already heard about.

>finally be able to squat
this right here, #1 reason for picking Rippetoe

Kinda this. I don't need any advice from any of them nor knowledge so I would pick zyzz to workout with

Gooby is a faggot (and also gay) and I don't like him as a person, but his mentorship helped me to get noob gainz once almost without injuries

Rippetoe because I need to get my OLY form down.

>almost
what happened?

Ripp because despite lifting for a couple of years, would love him to form spot check me.

Scoobs offers good advice but doesn't have Ripps portfolio in coaching, and Zyzz didn't accomplish much other than cycling roids taking drugs.

Rippletoe since I don't want Scooby getting a little too close to my unmentionables, and Zyzz seems like he'd be a right cunt in the gym.

Zyzz

ripplenips for me

Guy has a ridiculous amount of experience and knowledge with barbell training, which is what I'm most concerned with. The other two don't know anything about the subject by comparison.

Rip just to spend 2 hours drilling power cleans

This, I would pick scooby just because he seems like a legitimately nice person. Zyzz is a pretty boy attention whore and Rippletoe just seems disagreeable in general. Scoobs looks like he would actually use positive reinforcement because he genuinely wants people to make it.

Zyzz

Zyzz, I'm pretty sure I can make a killing showing I brought someone back from the dead