ITT: Despite all of our pretend alphaness and narcissistic beliefs...

Idk op, i think you need to stop giving a fuck. A lot of those things nobody will judge you for. If anything they'll find it amusing but respect your honesty. I tell people all the time that i like to knit, star wars is okay but overrated, and Inside Out is the best movie I've seen in years. These quirks make you seem like more of an individual and thus more interesting

>I love to dress in sparkly clothes and accessories. NOT cross dressing, just flamboyant and flashy
>have a huge SPH fetish
>piss fetish
>I'm a regular brap poster
>I break into hysterics when viewing frog memes
>I listen to video game soundtracks (20% of my listening time)
>I was a longtime waifufag, Chie from Persona 4, and only grew out of it because she cucks you in the spin-offs.
>I'm a contrarian of epic proportion, but only out of spite. I was socially outcasted in my early teens. Thankfully being a hipster was popular when i got to highschool, but I still always hated "normies" afterwards

you sound like an actually interesting person with depth of character. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

my philosophy has been
>there's no one whos gonna read it so no point
i enjoy writing them
it's cool because you aren't thinking about how good its gonna come out, which i think disrupts the process and makes the frame of mind unstable to the way it should be to construct thought provoking poetry.

idk what i just wrote i'm very high

also the bipolar thing

yeah that was very very weird. probably my best kept secret. the weird part was how good i was acting, sometimes i had to pretend to have episodes to keep up the act. The whole thing just makes me cringe looking back, idk how it was that convincing.

> i am high right now

i am also not gay haha
i like the photo thing too
thanks

damn that captcha was fucking hard

like 6/8 things on your list i would say describes me lol

>>I'm actually Danish, not German like I tell everyone
WOW! RADICAL.

>i have 200gb of categorized porn on my hard drive
>i unironically like paramore and all american rejects
>lurker/metal masturbator on lookism
>believe that the jews are using feminism as a way to distract men from their insidious plot

>pretended to be bipolar for 4 years to keep a FWB situation from developing into a long term relationship
that is just fucked. Lying only destroys your self over time. People that lie a lot really mess them self up and make relationships with other impossible. Watch out.

>My favorite movie of all time is either Tangled

easily the GOAT disney movie

>crawl up the stairs like a dog
>scream JUUUUUST in the head whenever I fuck something off
>have "REEEEed" at people in public before if it's 1:1 and they do something like litter or accidentally knock over me and it's not an old person or a young kid who might get scared
>always sing the chorus to songs in my head while moving my tongue really fast to both sides of my mouth as fast as I can when I'm walking to a class late and have to get there in time
>if something good happens and I'm on the computer and I'm alone sometimes I'll get up and swing my arms around and go apeshit like I'm hardcore dancing at a metal show
>whenever I have a really big pump sometimes I'll say "that's a big boy" under my breathe
>try to make the loudest and most high pitched noises when exhaling on my 1RM
>whenever I see people in public think how I'd attack them if I had to kill them, like see a fat guy with a beer gut and think how if I pushed him over he wouldn't get up so like on Fallout taking his legs out from beneath him would be 95% effective, but his stomach gut would only be 5% effective

>how if I pushed him over he wouldn't get up so like on Fallout taking his legs out from beneath him would be 95% effective, but his stomach gut would only be 5% effective

LOL

>not using vats and taking out the fat man's mininuke

do you even survive bro?

There goes the thread

>always sing the chorus to songs in my head while moving my tongue really fast to both sides of my mouth as fast as I can when I'm walking to a class late and have to get there in time.

I do something very similar. Its unintentional when it happens and its also fucken weird.
>move tounge side to side hitting the outer part of my open lips.

What the fuck is wrong with me Veeky Forums
>n-no homo

JUST

>been reading pic related sort of content during high school, which has led me to download tons of bara/fujoshit and to start collecting it IRL
>made false rumours about people to inflate my ego
>often look in the mirror listening to abstract music and do weird ritual dances depending on what i visualize in my head
>push homosexual boundaries when people are homophobic to cause a reaction from them
>need to shit more than once a day or else I think something is wrong
>unironically hate normies with a passion and compare them to sheep, have used the words "normies", "nice/dank meme", "REEEEEEEEE", and "SJW" in public or at parties on more than one occasion
>has extreme troubles starting something new, and will rewatch any old anime's or play video games I have already completed to fill in the void

my personal favourite

>have been attempting to set up a lifestyle to become a permaNEET by abusing government services due to insecurities that arouse from the wagecuck frogposter that posted nonstop on /pol/, have not had a stable job for 4 years due to it and don't want to in the future if possible, have considered faking a mental illness or becoming trans to be placed permanently on the disability pension

This is the most autistic thing I have ever read.

>I'm actually Danish, not German like I tell everyone
unforgivable

You may work out, but you are literally a weak faggot lel

I am extremely full 14/88 mode and people think I just lean to the right. For obvious reasons, I hide my power level.

That's a big boy

This is also why I lift. I want to be strong and ready when the race war comes.

For you

You're precious user. I'd say you are childish but appreciate innocence and beauty. Like the others said, it's easy for people to accept you for the stuff you listed.

I dress Veeky Forums, literally look like a 8/10 of my race and can really act up an alpha, cool confident character. I'm also naturally very commanding and dominant have a job, some connections and study at university.

However my autisms include:
>gore fetish
>sexually sadistic
>foot fetish
>violent
>very vindictive
>kid's cartoons
>picture books
>role play
>petty as fuck (naturally easy going as hell, inherited it from my mum's autistic manchild boyfriends)
>bad temper
>jealous
>terrible oneitis (but I get over her instantly whenever I see someone more beautiful)
>indecisive
>sjw tier moralfag but at the same time extremely conservative in some cases
>I love imagining stuff, all kinds of stuff, including stories, sexual fantasies, my ideal woman, events, fantasy worlds, strange visual graphics, worlds that exude a particular vibe
>warhammer
>I enjoy playing the warphilia and warwolf mods of mount and blade warband
>disciple tier scholarly knowledge of elder scrolls lore
>every year or two I get afflicted with a different kind of mild ocd such as: saying sorry, asking people to say sorry, germaphobia, closing doors and blinds, asking people what they said, making sure people heard everything I say.

That handsome and tall normie who dresses nicely with an excellent side part pompadour and slays in the clubs is actually extremely autistic.

>I have a passion for musicals, especially phantom of the opera, les mis, and wicked
Nothing wrong with this.

>I adore Disney movies and have hard crushes on many princesses. My favorite movie of all time is either Tangled or Frozen.
Having crushes on them is a little weird but it's not taboo, Disney movies are fun

>I love looking at the moon. I sometimes sleep in my backyard cuz I love seeing it so much
Nothing wrong.

>I unironically love linkin park cuz my older brother played it all the time growing up
Nothing wrong.

It's at this point that you start to become kind of a faggot.

>I'm actually Danish, not German like I tell everyone
Unnecessary lying for stupid reason is autistic.

>I love homestuck and I'm planning an equius cosplay, if only I could find a qt to do nepeta with me
Cosplay is weird/dorky if you're ugly and/or don't put 110% effort into your outfit. Otherwise you look like a loser.

>I own expensive artwork of Elsa and Anna that I've yet to hang up
This is really the only one you should kill your self for. I'll sing "let it go" drunk at 3am with my friends because it's fun, but this is just weird for a grown man

>I really love blowing air on the back of my hand
>I have a few compulsion neuroses, which i´m now be able to suppress in public
>I feel very bad when i don´t do these things because i think something bad will happen but i just say fuck it sometimes and be happy if i could resist
>Since i started watching porn with about 12 years, i knew that i needed to start early to train. So i tried to suppress the urge to cum with will and now i´m good with it (21 now)
>Sometimes i have just waves of rage in my head and i imagine tearing people apart or killing them in weird ways (happens often in road traffic)
>I was always kinda popular in school and now in uni but i´m not interested in meeting the "friends" i meet there in other places, because they´re normies and my best friends are internet friends which i´ve met multiple times in reallife and no we havn´t raped each other
>I´m planning on writing books about education and how a state should be organized because i believe via this way, i will have the best chances to form the future and have an impact on humanity
>I just wish to be able to contribute something to this world in a positive way and not only taking something...
>I personify things i often use
>For example i´m always thankful that my toilet does his job so good and give him a brofist in my mind
>I look like the tryhard version of jeff seid - i´m just glad he´s not popular in my country
>I´m playing dota and hoping to become a pro someday (5k atm)

that´s enough for today

>I like to walk around malls/densely populated areas and be highly observant of people's aesthetic as well as their behaviors and mannerisms while giggling to myself. I look at what they wear and how it is or isn't coordinated, their race, gender, the way they carry themselves, the way they walk, the way they talk, who they surround themselves with, etc. To those around me it may seem like I'm getting hysterical and/or mumbling/talking to myself over nothing, I've had a few of my friends ask if I was high. I've never even touched an Illegal substance or plant. It's a really fun way to kill some time.
>When I'm alone I like to think about the psychology of different types of people and how to best manipulate them for my own enjoyment/amusement. I'm not taking about getting some hot girl to suck my dick. I'm talking about getting dumb nerds to listen to my retarded advice and take what I'm saying seriously as if it's 100% fact even though I'm making shit up on the spot/ regurgitating memes. A couple of my long term friends have figured it out though and have started calling my process "Anonning" (obviously replace "user" with my actual name).
>I unironically believe the Jews orchestrated the Holocaust in order to discredit anyone who questions or apposed them, and that Hitler and every other major player in the two world wars was on the Jews side the whole time.
>I don't enjoy sex or relationships so much as I enjoy manipulating the other individual for my amusement. Playing mind games and increasing sexual tension is much more appealing to me than cuddling or sticking my dick in a wet hole.
>I unironically find and regularly listen to the shittiest music I can obtain for free. From artists like (hed) p.e., X Clan, Isaiah MC-Jesus, etc.

>I get way too attached to people
>I get over emotional when I'm in a relationship
>I like Nickelback
>I used to be part of the /mlp/ fad
>Despite having a deep voice, being hairy, and being hung I act more like a teenaged white girl than a 21 year old man
>I just want some companionship
>I'm into some weird porn and only one girl has been willing to try anything slightly kinky with me

Judge me, bros. Do your worst

What do you rekon of the 7.0 patch?
I stopped played at that. Was slowly grinding mmr to 5k as well.
>4.8k solo

some time is needed to get used to it but i think it is fine now...except for the HUD this shit is cancer

i fap a lot.
like a LOT. 3-5 times daily.

I like scented candles

i do boxing because the pain makes me feel alive. sometimes i actually tell them to hit me harder and purposely leave my sides open.

Got one of my hs mates into it
>hes 2.7k hours in
>im 3.7k hours
we have a group of 8 or so that would play relatively often. Like atleast once or twice a day.
>everyone has over 2.5k hours

Out of our 8group. 3 have stopped playing after the update. Not sure if the others will pick it up again soon. But im defs not. They changed too much at once imo.

We are of a kind, my friend.

>i'm captivated everytime I look at the stars/moon
>i love musicals more than i care to admit
>I like to talk about and express my feelings (ex. there are times i'd much rather just sit and talk with a girl about my problems, because I feel that they are more comfortable talking about problems, rather than bottling them up like guys do.)
>I have an extremely short temper for someone who doesn't do drugs
>I catch feels for girls i'm really into waaaaaaay too easily, but I'm a master at concealing that to the world, it ends up hurting me because I'm unsuccessful once again with another girl I really liked
>I can't (Unless super drunk) fuck a girl I don't feel an emotional/mental connection with
>I respect all women and men
>I don't mind not kissing/fucking girls on dates

I'm called gay when I display any of these behaviors. Life sucks when you're a 6"4 115kg brown guy who just wants to be real with people.

How does a gore fetish exist in real life?

>hate casual sex
>just want to be monogamous
I wish it was just this but I also low-key despise anyone who has casual sex AND I DONT KNOW WHY.

I read shotacon rape manga and fap to it.

Irl I am a dorky anime fan and everyone knows it. I am a grill and fit so I get away with it. But no one will ever know about the shotacon.

Damn I want to be friends with you user

Well, if you aren't a crazy person, you simply learn to keep your crazy stuff to yourself. It's fine to have fantasies as long as you are in control and keep it to yourself so no one is hurt or offended. SOMETHING THE FAGGOTS AND TRANNIES AND CHILD MOLESTERS NEEX TO FUCKING LEARN INSTEAD OF MAKING PEOPLE ACCEPT THEIR RETARDATION.

Also into necrophilia. My gore fetish came from seeing a beautiful woman behead herself on tv when I was 2 or 3 years old. Censorship is a good thing for children.

>I don't give a fuck about most of my friends

Hi, Gorefetish user here, I can pretend rape you if you ever feel like exploring that fantasy.

Haha oh wow, kill yourself Tbh

>I post on NSA data mining threads so they can blackmail me if I ever become important

>I have a weird facination with cats and I get sexualy aroused when I'm near them
>I like to comb/play with my hair when I'm stressed or bored
>I'm really in to incest and I have a crush on my sister
>I take pictures of my friends when they're not watching and make reaction images of them

>Anime
>Dota 2
>Tetris
>Drawing
>writing

>Telling people that he's a race-mixed watered down nazi instead of a proud Scandinavian
It's almost as if he wants to play life on hard mode

I use Veeky Forums

>Dane
>scandinavian
Nice try Holger.

I feel like I have to work so hard to try and get my friends into dota 2...

I can really relate to the awe you feel when looking at the stars. When I am home in the rural area I often just sit under the stars, completely blown away, the strongest feeling I get that is not from a human.
Also
>I catch feels for girls i'm really into waaaaaaay too easily, but I'm a master at concealing that to the world, it ends up hurting me because I'm unsuccessful once again with another girl I really liked

For myself:
>I am very susceptible to what some would call conspiracy theories
>A solid part of the day I just sit around and think about myself. It is self centered, but not narcisstic, it does not make me like myself. I know about many of my flaws but still do not do shit.
>I am very afraid of being just some normal guy, but desu I think I just am the epitome of a Normie. This makes me feel like I am somehow a hipster too.
>I make weird movements and sounds when I remember awkward or bad situations. Noone noticed it happens often yet, I just get the occasional "What was that?"
>I can not grasp the fact that my family member simply will not be anymore at one point. I do not think that I will get over that. I lost my grandpas when I was really young, but that was different. I loved them, but the relationship I have with my family members now is basically a requirement for me to live. I thought about that quite often for some time, right now I just bottle it up.
>I do not have a passion for a hobby. I am always obsessed about the series and Anime I watch, but that is just escapism.
>I still have vivid, childish daydreams of me rescuing everyone and shit like this, basically just situations that would solve my need for instant gratification.
>I spent 80% of my free time playing LoL beteween grade 7 and 12.

>Not realizing that Sjælland is closer to Scania than most of Norway filled with mountain monkeys and Stockholm filled with muslims

You are neither racially nor culturally scandinavian. Even western finns have more claim to being scandinavian than you shits.

If you unironically use the etymological and linguistic argument, you're just as deluded as the subhuman germans that think they're the same as us.

Western finns? Holy shit dude, I'm not even going to argue with someone about this. You probably do a split program and think creatine will make you fat.
I'm out.

>Sjælland
>not filled with muslisms

Fuck off Preben, you are in denial.

You are literally closer to Dutch, Germans and Englishmen than you are Scandinavian.

>that's a big boy
Hahahahaha holy shit muh sides!

>I despise the ideology to it's core, as well as poltards, but I secretly admire the Nazis. The uniforms, the parades, the manliness is really inspiring propaganda and I see why people followed it.
>Whenever I see a girl with short hair, I think it looks shitty 95% of the time and it internally angers me, to an almost incoherent boiling point
>I really like 80's synthpop

> fleshlight
> smoke weed
> retro videogame collection
> bdsm porn
> i'm really autistic, with a report and all

>while watching, talk to characters in movies
>talk to myself
>while watching, talk to characters in anime in japanese
>sometimes think of a joke and completely lose my shit laughing
>sometimes dance to get where I'm going
>cry while watching sad movies, anime, whatever
>cry while listening to particular pieces of music
>when I have to study I sometimes scream "IYADAAAA" "ZETTAI IYAAAA" but then proceed to study (nip for I don't fucking want to)
>I unironically enjoy talking to gay autists on a chinese cartoon discussion website

>Only leave the house to go across the road to my brothers house to lift his weights or if my friend takes me to the cinema
>Constantly feel anxious about myself
>Spend huge amounts of money because I get tonnes in benefits
>Hobbies tend not to last long because I feel like I've exhausted them or get sick of doing them

>calling germans subhuman

German's are subhumans but Scandinavians are almost nigger tier in terms of accomplishment.

Oh wow you used to loot and rape places, what a beautiful culture Kristian Abdulrahman :)

well yeah some i know stopped as well but they stopped all for the same reason.

They played only one or two heroes only and them especially well but they couldn´t fit their heroes into the new meta (and map)

Fuck off civcuck materialist shill.

By that logic, Han aren't merely overgrown termites and we all know that's wrong.

>I have a thing for building management type games. I spent all weekend playing Tropico 4, for example.

>Love gardening, growing plants in general. I grow my own food so I know exactly what's in it and don't have to worry.

>Slowly learning all types of homesteading skills. One day I want to build my own cabin innawoods and live a very simple life.

>When I'm at home with no guests, I wear a silky baby blanket around my shoulders like I'm Linus from Peanuts. I sleep with it. I try to not wash it. I like how funky it smells.

>insecure about height (5'4 barefoot)
>wear heel lifts
>insecure about dick (5 inches)
>rape fantasies
>secretly wish I had an excuse to stop loving my gf of 3 years so I can cheat on her and/or leave her
>only have ONE male friend and he's legit autistic
>Play commentary in my head when doing routine activities like wiping my ass or drinking water.. "and he takes 1, 2, 3, 4 gulps before sitting the cup down" (that's how lonely i feel)
>Feel superior to absolutely everyone and know nobody is as smart as me and that I could kill them all easily... but have no proof or achievements to back up my thoughts.

Any hope for me to make it?

Pls be true, its too funny

sounds like your thought of "superiority" is the desperate scream made of your insecurities..

stop thinking so bad about other people, some just make the impression of being stupid but are very smart - they just don´t show it

i backed this for 1864 dollars.
kickstarter.com/projects/poots/kingdom-death-monster-15/updates

>and he takes 1, 2, 3, 4 gulps before sitting the cup down
reading this in a WWE announcers voice made me lose my shit hard

It is 100% senpai.
I do behave normally enough in public though.

user, I'm sorry, but you are a psychopath.

>that's a big boy

That's a big boy

>Everytime I meet someone I can't help but pick at what their doing for flaws or attempt to rationalize their thoughts from their actions (the secondpart especially when I'm smoking pot with people)

>Everyone always says I'm supercalm an chilled when I'm stoned but in reality I'm freaking out on the inside and knit picking everything that's happening around me and rationalizing it (same goes for sober but to a lesser degree)

>I love listening to classical music AND Die Antwoord

>I'm always having these grand thoughts, ideas or theories In my head but have no outlet and I'm aware of the importance of writing things down but don't and somehow makes me feel like a failure

>Everyone thinks I'm just this big dude that can take everything in his stride and isn't swayed by anything, but in reality I'm Just to autistic to react with facial expressions and shut things down with critical analysis of whatever is happening

I'm really just a caring soul with delusions of grandeur, a god complex and a rough outward appearance that I'm too afraid to Break to be myself

>I am painfully bad with girls and I'm fucking 23 years old

Feels like this is something I should have gotten over 7 years ago, like most of my normal friends (I have three friends, two are my cousins)

>constant need to improve myself
>crippling weed addiction which I solved recently by not purchasing weed
>crippling video game addiction that resurfaced since I made enough to buy a gaming pc
>used to take the college partying to another level
>as a result can drink three times as much as a normal man
>used to be a player until met my current girlfriend whom I am very happy with
>full time software development job, part time school
>extensive use of psychedelics since third year of university
>guitar player
>used to draw, want to start again
>6'3, been lifting since 11th grade but never took nutrition seriously enough to be at my goal
>cheated my way through first and second year of uni
>can learn things quickly
>optimistic guy
>consider myself an ex nerd chard
>close group of friends of ex nerd chads
>go to a lot of indie live music shows

lifes good

Yeah that's pretty bad desu

If I were you I'd just end it.

t. autists

>wear the same generic sports shorts every single day, day and night, no matter the weather (have multiple pairs of the same so they don't get too dirty)
>have one pair of trousers for social gatherings
>choose from my limited range of socks based on mood (wear socks consecutively if mood stays consistent, only wash if mood changes)
>worry about my hair obsessively (normies obviously do this too)
>don't read anything published after 1950
>don't believe in truth (base my own practical philosophy on aesthetic value rather than morals)
>manipulate people for entertainment (not being edgy, it's just fun to predict how they will react and then test it, I accept that this is based on a sense of my own triviality)
>listen to very loud noise every morning to 'reset' or 'cleanse' my mind of any accumulated stress
>broke up with recent gf because I was disgusted by the contrast between her timid, submissive affection for me and her considerable past experience in sucking dick

>have active, fun social life

Edgy

For real though, I know someone like this... But in reality they only think they're manipulating people etc... They seem to forget that people talk when they're not around and actually aren't stupid and won't say it to their delusional face

He really just needed a big old reality check and someone to take his ego down a bit and he became a heck of a lot more stable and functional.

Linkin Park have and will always suck

>8/10 of my race

Sorry Pajeet thats still pretty terrible

>that's a big boy

>actually danish
>not german

fucking kekking so hard rn thanks man

I'm kinda racist, but also not good at talking so I make mean jokes and also don't attempt to maintain contact with most of the people I know.

>I'm planning an equius cosplay,
how fucking autistic can you be?

MY SIDES
Y

S
I
D
E
S

>I am secretly very idealistic, and consider hippie shit like The Venus Project a viable alternative for the society of today
>I am very flexible, so i sometimes bite my toenails
>I usually do elliothulses bioerengetic warmup when i wake up, and it got me into some awkward situations, because that shaking bit in it makes me look like in posessed
>I have watched 100+ hours of videos if car body assembly lines/electronics industry and other heavily automatised factoryies, while listening to dance with the dead/lazerhawk/pertubator/other retrowave stuff

Honest question, are you over 18? Only because I'm finding it hard to believe someone who's over 18 could be like this

No hate homie just seriously confused at the concept, learn some im Work/Life/Schooling (if you're getting a degree) balance and understand that everyone dies, it's a pretty simply concept anyone last 10 years old normally gets.

I think I'm bisexual. I mean, I fucking love girls and my girlfriend is terrific - we bang several times every night. But when I go to the gym and guys stare at my dick in the showers I get diamonds. I also hooked up with this older cuck couple and creampie'd the wife, afterwards the guy was eating my cum from his wife and started blowing me, cleaning me off. It was incredible. I'm not attracted to guys in the least bit but I think it's the domination aspect of it. Like I'd never want to get banged, but I would probably bang a dude given the right set of circumstances.

>I talk to myself, a lot
>Sometimes while listening to metal I sing with the vocal and pretend I am in the middle of a satanist ritual
>I only masturbate to the imagination of my harem made up of my past acquaintances, girlfriends, classmates and even some teachers
>I masturbate as a part of the aforementioned ritual
>I regularly get up from my desk and and go in front of a mirror to strike a pose and self mire
>I subtly spout memes IRL
>Autistically try to fit every piece of my outfit including the underwear, sometimes if I am unpleased with just the undershirt I completely change everything
>I enjoy getting blackout drunk and spazzing in the dancefloor, not for chicks, just because it is fun to move to the beat
>I enjoy watching reality shows beacuse drama
>I am growing my hair out even tho I sometimes think it looks shit

The gist is, I am a Veeky Forums, good looking, social Computer Engineering student who is top of his class in nations most prestigious college and only my roommates are aware of this stuff.

>I love seeing my own face in the mirror
>depending on my mood can have a short temper
>still cuddle with my childhood teddy and i see no reason to stop
>was an very emotional kid and was bullied for it and now I get angry when I should be sad
>I where never in love and im scared that I never will be
Had problems with self-image and now have a little to much confidence
>I'm a big cinema nerd and have like 150 blurays at the moment
>constantly daydreaming about adventures or something because nothing interesting happens in my life
>sometimes have gay thoughts but I am repulsed by dicks
>since I got fit(still dyel) 3 girls with boyfriends hit on me and I don't know if I could resist a 4th

>I have no parents that live in the same dtate
>I have never asked a girl out
>I do more housework than my other family members
>I waste most of my time
>I don't enjoy going outside or hanging out with friends
>I enjoy Videogames
>I watch conspiracy theories
>I care about animals
>I hate really tall shit
>I use Veeky Forums.

That's about it mates