Best routine for a lanklet pussy?

I can't even deadlift the fucking bar much less squat guys.
How the fuck do I do SS, seems like my only option is a bro split using machines.
Please help guys, I'm literally crying.

You literally can't be that weak

I am 6'0 and like 50kg, I was hospitalized and I'm borderline anorexic now, the only exercise I don't feel borderline disabled doing is bicep curls (I can only lift like 10lb dumbels).
My legs are tinier than my arms man I feel like I'm going to snap city if I start squating with the bar.

Literally impossible you can't deadlift the bar. No-one's that weak.

Start with machines then
Do bodyweight stuff too, and make sure you eat alot
Within a month you'll at least be able to squat the bar

I started out a similar weight about 5 months ago (55kg at 6'), now I'm 70kg. I could easily deadlift 60kg to start, and squat 40kg. No way you can't. Eat a fuck ton, man up and do it

This is a long shot but if you're anywhere near Austin TX I'll whip your dyel ass into shape

I'm telling you I am, I can do like 5 pushups and everything starts hurting and I use proper form.
Also I might be able to deadlift the bar just barely but not enough to do it with proper form and to be honest it is just fucking embarrasing.

Eat you spooky skeleton. Eat everything.

So what are the best alternatives for squats and deadlifts? I just probably need a month or two.

>6'0
You're not a fucking lanklet, definitely a pussy though

When I do the last couple of reps of a set of pull-ups, for example, I can go to my very upper limit and even "risk" failing the last repetition; the worst thing that could happen would be that I have to stop in the middle of the movement and just "fall down"; pretty much the same with free weights.
With squats & deadlifts on the other hand, I'm getting afraid of either hurting my back permanently (even when I try to keep the back straight, I just have the fear that the pressure somehow is too much; or that my form is wrong without me noticing), or that I can't even get up after going down for a squat, and essentially lose the balance, tip over or get "nailed" under the barbell.

Well I think it's clear your first order of business should be eating. Like, a lot.

>can do pull-ups
>can't lift a bar from the floor
Hmm

Should have mentioned they were assisted pull ups lol.

Bro just drop the bar
I have weights at my house and I do squats outside
Whenever I fail I just drop the bar
Also you are not going to hurt yourself with 20kg man you don't even need to worry about that

You're probably bullshitting but you should be more concerned about eating than doing deadlifts

do bodyweight exercises & eat 500 cal over for 2-3 months, then go to the gym hop on SS/SL and do the same

You form will be bad at the beginning. That's why you practice and start with the bar like countless other people also did.

Yeah but my problem is that I'm MUCH WEAKER than the average unfit person.
If this was me in high school where I was just skinny but not almost anorexic I could do it.
I'm going to the gym tomorrow anyways I figured avoiding squats and dlifts for now is better than doing nothing.

sit on my face

Smolov cycle you cuck