How would you describe human culture to an alien visitor?

>We're the greediest most self centered species in the universe.
Source pl0x

Could you tip any harder? We're literally the greatest until proven otherwise.

>Most empathetic creature on this planet
>In general, very altruistic
>Can make choices that override instinct on basis of ethics
>Can formulate higher purpose in life through thoughts

Nothing but a bunch of savage monkeys really right?

That's the neanderthal DNA, nigger's are still monkeys

ebin

"People are probably gonna want to have sex with you guys soon, so prep your anuses. Other than that we're really great people, except for muslims, they're terrible."

When I was young I used to fantasize about the BHD (Big human dick) genociding local aliens and stealing their women.

>killing and murdering

Dont even bother.

Assuming we're past the "learn human language" step.

Human culture is, in the purest form, a pursuit of knowledge to further improve our lives.

"its something we do so we dont get super bored"

Yea but we are still fucking awesome

Killing and murdering are 2 different things mate.

How's that, mate?

Are you serious? There's a reason we have different names for them. In law manslaughter is killing someone, but it's not murder. Plenty of people have accidentally killed others. That doesn't mean it was with malicious intent (which is what classifies murder).

I murdered your mom's pussy last night. She should have killed you with an abortion.

A literal decaying piece of shit

>YOU'LL NEVER GET ME ALIVE, GRAYYS! MY ANUS WILL REMAIN INTACT, GOD DAMN YOU!

We want your technology and to destroy you

It would be pretty difficult to recognise peculiarities if there is no outside reference point. So, why don't you let me show you around so you'll see for yourself?

>the dna of the human species speculated to have a very primitive sense for sociality is the reason why modern humans are so social.

Uh, okay bruh.

any intelligent alien would be the same, do you think you become advanced by hugging predators

You brainlets are getting more aggressive by the day

It's tough keeping you retards on a leash. Sometimes it wears on us when we have to explain basic 101 concepts to people. You're supposed to be 18 plus, stop acting like you have the education of a middle schooler.

idk but I like this alien design

We're also the worst untill proven otherwise.
Besides, that user wasn't tipping. Read your bible user!

"Humans have this delusion. It's called equality. Through this delusion, they have allowed their less intelligent subspecies to breed out of control and overwhelm their planet. In Human society, the smartest and most hard working fraction supports the breeding of lesser subspecies through a mechanism called "foreign aid" and "welfare". It is a process of reverse eugenics as Humans actively seek to destroy and degenerate their species. We are uncertain as to the reason, but it appears a devastating planet wide war has made any talk of positive eugenics taboo, even the milder types. Humanity is a case study, the only known example of a sentient species reaching the stage of interplanetary travel and DNA research that does not seek to actively improve their race, increasing intelligence, lifespan and strenght through genetic engineering."

Vast majority of humans live like animals with the exception being Europeans who were able to make a higher culture that ruled the world

>Human culture is, in the purest form, a pursuit of knowledge to further improve our lives.
How historically illiterate are you? The vast majority of cultures have been conservative and embracing of the status quo.

Anacondas do.

Stop conflating modern western culture with the whole of humanity.

You don't know any of that for sure, would be a very shitty way of describing it.

>I failed to breed therefore I am superior

They would be Gods. Or stars. In which case, with the greeks.

I am just stating facts.
Why does this upset you?

"We draw dicks on walls when not figuring new ways to kill each other."

...

More chill than chimpazees, less chill than bonobos.

wew lad

Murder is unlawful killing

/pol/tards really are worse than furfags

The only reason we seem so pretty and vindictive is that we've yet to find something to fight other than ourselves.
First we hunted animals and then suddenly that was no longer a challenge but a sort, then we fought each other, they we got so GOOD at killing each other that we had to put parameters in place to make sure we didn't accidentally wipe out our entire species.

No edgy "humanity fuck yeah" shit or some faggy "quote" from what someone read on /x/, but in reality we are thus far the most intuitive, resilient, innovative creatures that we have found in all of the known universe and any problems or stagnation come from being so utterly unchallenged that there is no need to do anything but kick back and relax.

Zero arguments except namecalling.
I'm not surprised.

There is literally nothing wrong with eugenics and in all probability, most species capable of interplanetary travel would not doubt to research genetic engineering to prevent diseases, extend their lifespans and their intelligence. The fact that we are not actively doing so can only be attributed to an illogical cultural taboo.

The fact that we'd rather deal with climate change and overpopulation instead of genetic engineering and population control tells you about our short-sightedness as a species.

More children die in Africa from malnutrition every year than those that died in the wars of antiquity. And this incredible amount of Human suffering only exists thanks to naive liberals lile you who have encouraged people incapable of caring for their children to breed without control instead of tying their wombs.

It's bad
Offing edgelords like these individuals would greatly improve it.

Like the other poster already states, most of the world isn't retarded like the Westerners are.

We grow stuff that we ingest which gives us energy to do stuff and to procreate. We have two genders, which are necessary for procreation, which helps adding variability to our gene pool. We also like to listen to certain sound patterns and create stuff that we like to look at.

>Still no reasonable argument against eugenics, more namecalling

Should've stayed as apes.

Western culture had similar birth rates a while ago. What exactly is the point here?

All your base are belong to us.

Tbh it has to be this, but a little more self aware

Murder is not the only illegal form of killing.

Show them this pic and talk about USA

It's because no one has any interest in having a discussion with you. There are several probable causes for that. First the way you chose to phrase your posts, which is annoying, second, your own lack of argumentation, and third, your choice of a stale subject that's been discussed to death. Fourth is your lack of awareness, which is why most >uhh why don't we just kill/castrate/harm X group of people don't get serious replies.

That sculpture is so excellent.

Mankind doesn't have a unified culture, but i think what we mean to describe here is mankind's condition.
We posess greater faculties of reason than logic than the animals. Our impressions and beliefs are put through greater thought and discourse than the impulses of beasts.
It is by this way that we work and fight for concepts far greater than that which is what is to our immediate material gain.

arguments on what constitutes what is good, or even if such a thing exists, is to our greatest concern and we have fought one another in many ways many times in it's pursuit.

You forgot power

OOGA BOOGA SEX
OOGA BOOGA GIBS ME DAT
OOGA BOOGA ME BETTER THAN YOU
OOGA BOOGA MY LAND MINE MINE MINE

Tell them to wipe us out before we fuck up the galaxy.

youtube.com/watch?v=Mo-RcRQeqA8

"We were hunters and foragers. The frontier was everywhere. We were bounded only by the earth, and the ocean, and the sky. The open road still softly calls. Our little terraqueous globe as the madhouse of those hundred thousand millions of worlds. We, who cannot even put our own planetary home in order, riven with rivalries and hatreds; are we to venture out into space?"

"By the time we are ready to settle even the nearest other planetary systems, we will have changed. The simple passage of so many generations will have changed us; necessity will have changed us. We are… an adaptable species. It will not be we who reach Alpha Centauri and the other nearby stars. It will be a species very like us, but with more of our strengths, and fewer of our weaknesses; more confident, farseeing, capable and prudent."

"For all our failings, despite our limitations and fallibilities, we humans are capable of greatness. What new wonders undreamt of in our time, will we have wrought in another generation, and another? How far will our nomadic species have wandered, by the end of the next century, and the next millennium?"

"Our remote descendants, safely arrayed on many worlds through the solar system, and beyond, will be unified, by their common heritage, by their regard for their home planet, and by the knowledge that, whatever other life may be, the only humans in all the universe, come from Earth. They will gaze up and strain to find the blue dot in their skies. They will marvel at how vulnerable the repository of all our potential once was, how perilous our infancy, how humble our beginnings, how many rivers we had to cross, before we found our way."

-- Carl Sagan

Didn't read

we need oxygen to not die and it also has to push down on us so we dont deflate

imagine doing all that just to get a bitch to sleep with you

You son of a bitch, you wanna blow our cover? Its like you DON'T want to rape, kill and murder their family for their shiny space rocks

He's still 14 apparently, I wouldn't worry

I can almost guarantee that should advanced sentient species exist outside our galaxy, they are all more intelligent, more violent, more emphatic, more warlike, more greedy and more ruthless than us in every aspect.

>humans are selfish and irrational
>NO OTHER ORGANISM IS AS SELFISH AND IRRATIONAL AS HUMANS ARE!!!!!!!!!

hmm

I saw a conspiracy theory that earth is known on the intergalactic community as Space North Korea.

We are the klingons of the universe, probably.

Why did this post trigger everyone? Isn't it basically right? Humans aren't all bad, however it is risky to let them have power over you. I can almost guarantee some of the little shits in this thread would torture someone to death just for their amusement.

I have come to think that human empathy follows a normal distribution.

There is a tiny minority of people who actually care about other people, animals and the environment in general.
Most people care just a little bit, but wont move their asses for anybody else unless its family, a real friend or they are obligated somehow or there is profit involved.

Then there is another tiny minority of psychopaths who seem to actually try to hurt others and the entire world.

I think this pretty much sums it up.

we try to impress the other sex so we can breed, but if that doesn't work out you can always tug on your wiener while looking at gook cartoons

You dont stop having children and THEN become rich. You become rich and then you stop having children. This is obvious by looking into the history of wester hemisphere.

Alien's are a comic book fantasy.

Wrong. Very wrong.

If you'd taken two seconds to look at the actual statistics you would see how obviously false this is. Ukraine is one of the poorest countries in Europe, and Germany is one of the richest, yet they both have low fertility rates compared to France or the UK. Vietnam and Sweden have roughly the same fertility rates despite the obvious disparities in wealth.

Most serious anthropologists are coming to accept that fertility, while influenced by economic factors that allow better access to contraception, is primarily determined by culture. The reason the argument that fertility naturally decreases as a country gets richer is popular is because it means the spineless moralisers of first world countries don't have to seriously think about the problems of third world fertility. No need to have to face up to a serious moral conundrum between human rights and the potentially catastrophic consequences of unchecked population growth. Not only is aid spending not making the problem worse, it's actually the solution to high fertility, so I get to feel morally superior and not have to worry about any adverse consequences.

It also absolves first world people who're living in countries with population growth below replacement levels of any responsibility for that either. Low fertility is passed off as a sign of prosperity, a status symbol, rather than a problem that will have crippling long-term consequences.

Basically, upper middle class liberals in first world countries have flipped reality completely upside down just so they get to keep feeling good about themselves.

Your idea doesnt hold because
>amount of wealth changes culture
and
>western culture used to have high fertility too
and
>what do china/japan share culturally with europe?

>amount of wealth changes culture
not in a way that correlates with fertility.

>western culture used to have high fertility too
before modern contraceptive /everyone/ had high fertility. Besides, the whole point of what I was trying to say is that's it's lazy, facile thinking to assume that there is one path of development and poorer countries are moving towards a more western style of living. The fact that western cultures used to have high fertility doesn't really have any bearing on what will happen to fertility in the rest of the world.

>what do china/japan share culturally with europe?
Who said they had to share anything? I never said it was the /same/ cultural features that affected fertility. You're the one who reduced it to a dichotomy.

You are so fucking retarded

All I know is If aliens ever have an encouter with us we will fuck their shit up so hard they'll go back to whatever shitty rocks they came from and never try to fuck with us again
The more mature I get the more I realize we actually very well might be the most powerful specie of the univers

Truth.

nice argument

kek

non-whites aren't human

...

Power hungry, destructive, ignorant We kill tons of other innocent life forms throughout the Earth voluntarily and involuntarily. We pollute the earth without caring what it will do to other species. All we care about is wealth and power and resources and thanks to that war comes out, you are next.

We use our gift of intelligence to cut down trees , torture animals , destroy atmosphere and eco systems .Yet we pray god to forgive our sins so that we can commit more.

What are you doing on a website dedicated to non human media?

>first message for possible aliens to receive from Earth is "Peace, Lenin, USSR"
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morse_Message_(1962)

Russia needs to be nuked for this alone.