Is it just me or is God a petty little self-absorbed asshole?

Is it just me or is God a petty little self-absorbed asshole?

Why do people love this guy? I'm about halfway through Genesis and so far he's done nothing that would inspire people to worship him. In fact, he's acting like the devil.

>puts a tree in a garden to tempt people, then when they get rused by a snek he sentences them to hard labour with death as a reward.
>curses Eve so childbirth is extremely painful
>divides a united humanity that decided to build a tower for literally no reason.
>decides to drown everyone except Noah because he didn't like what they were doing
>curses kings and kingdoms because they took Abraham's wife because Abraham told them she was his sister, god was in on this lie

There's so much more like this. I don't get it. God is clearly a dickhead. Does he get more likeable in the future?

*I'm reading the KJV.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=r0IU1J1w8Qo
youtube.com/watch?v=3tCvPHozwZw
youtube.com/watch?v=Ae6TF2GIzVQ
youtube.com/watch?v=W5HCSNnUdys
youtube.com/watch?v=Jk37KJDslhY
youtube.com/watch?v=k3VSRSJYjzs
youtube.com/watch?v=PQgxdrhjhKQ
youtube.com/watch?v=udZK_F7X-pA
archive.is/p20Th
youtube.com/watch?v=QEn5QnM3lXE
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

bump

You again

You are not fit for learning anything, I'm afraid.

Resume your anime and hush

He's a big guy

why did you bump under 10 mins?

and holy moley i hope this is bait; it's pretty dense

call a parish and talk to a priest or catechist(be respectful obviously). Ask them these lower tier questions.

Im not trying to insult you, it's just those half baked questions and the ideas behind them are certainly not going to be the nails to put God in a coffin.

But yeah, call a local Catholic Church. Tell them you have theological based questions—I feel like a catechist(someone who formally teaches the beliefs of Catholics) could be what you're lookin for.

Hope this helps, user (assuming it's not bait) and God bless

>In fact, he's acting like the devil.
Now you begin to see

I can't just walk into a church and ask questions. I'm too socially retarded for that.

Also, that bump wasn't me.

nah, just call the office number (check their website). Parishes usually have multiple buildings. One is obviously the Chapel, but there'll be an office with receptionists and all. Tell them why you're calling and that you'd like to speak with a catechist or a priest to help you understand the Bible more or Christianity more(ask whatever you want to really). And more than likely, you'll be able to talk to someone more qualified on the subject that men on Veeky Forums

The Jews couldn't think of a better character to depict him as. It's not to be taken literally.

For us

God doesn't really figure his shit out until Exodus. Over analyzing Exodus helped me figure out what the hell this "God" guy was trying to do in the first one

herecomethemanicheans.fresco

>Does he get more likeable in the future?
No it literally gets solved by "who are you to judge god" in Romans 9

Sarai was Abraham's sister though. Incest is a common motif in Near East religions.

>Is it just me or is God a petty little self-absorbed asshole?

That's not really God. But God likes itself regardless.

Pharaoh is a god. Moses and his followers are wannabes.

youtube.com/watch?v=r0IU1J1w8Qo

>There's so much more like this. I don't get it. God is clearly a dickhead. Does he get more likeable in the future?

The god of the Israelites is a jealous, vengeful god. Literally a tribal god little better than their neighbors.

Eventually, some very smart Hellenic Jews got tired of waiting for a messiah. These students of Plato wrote the New Testament as a retcon of the Old Testament. They meant to transform the YHWH into a god that fit the Platonic form of the good. These apostles and church fathers created Jesus as an archetypical scapegoat who would break all cycles of vengeance for every generation that heard his message. It's really fucking brilliant.

Yes, keep reading the Bible. Read Plato while you're at it, and study his students and their theology of the One god. When you're done with the Bible read the apostolic fathers and the apocrypha as well.

Only redditors think this is a good point.
>haha god was an asshole xd gotten
The whole point was OT God wasn't someone you wanted to fuck around with, he even calls himself jealous and angry later on. See also how he destroyed Egypt to prove a point.
It was only when Jesus sacrificed himself that God got less butthurt. There's a reason they used to call religious people 'God fearing'.

The god of the OT is very clearly a malevolent demon of some kind, the god of the NT is a Greek conception of pure Agape. The two simply do not mesh, and tying them together has been the single greatest downfall of Christianity.
>tl;dr- Marcion was right

yeah I agree with you OP let's kill God

>t.dimwit
This is only plausible of God is a finite being, bound by time just as we are. If God is all-knowing and eternal, how could he "change his mind", and why would he behave differently at different times? neither makes any sense for an eternal all-knowing god, but are perfectly understandable for a malevolent demon.

>Marcion
my motherfuckin' negro

I'm not religious in any way but from what I've read in the Bible, it always seemed that humans were the ones that were the assholes. God was just trying to set up some ground rules for this nice little place he created for us to live rent free, and then we go and did the exact shit he told us not to fucking do.

However, if humans had not eaten from the tree of knowledge, we would not be self aware. So it's kind of a blessing and a curse at the same time. If we had not been given the knowledge, we would all be brainless buffoons who just walk around butt ass naked and throwing shit at each other.

That's how I interpreted it at least. God was just trying to establish that he brought into this world, don't forget he can take us out.

Oh my god, god is our mom. Confirmed, god is actually a woman.

Except God isn't our landlord, he;s our creator, and he's not just "trying to figure things out", he's ALL-KNOWING, ie, he knew before he created us exactly how everything would go down, right down to him "being forced" to act like a psychopathic monster regularly, but he did it anyway. The only possible conclusion is that he LIKES acting like a psychopathic monster.

Or that the all knowing thing was just a tad bit exaggerated possibly?

Why is it that many branches of Christianity just like to pretend that the OT didn't happen?

I used to be in this Baptist school and I would ask questions about Genesis, and they always told me the same thing: Read the books of John, Luke, Mark, and whatever that fourth one was. The only OT book that church would ever acknowledge was the book of Psalms, and even that was rare.

Anyone got any ideas?

Oh wow you just solved religion! Hey, guys, what if God is just a tad bit exaggerated possibly? That solves everything, right? Oh , except I guess that makes God a liar, in which case he can't be god, because God can't lie. Oh, and if we accept God is lying about being all-knowing, then I guess we can't take him at his word ANYWHERE in the Bible, including the part where he identifies himself as God. But hey, at least you explained why God is an inconstant cunt!

Protestants don't like to think too hard about stuff.

The OT is the book of the Jews might be why. And it contains 0% Jesus.

Although tbhwyf I'm surprised Genesis was not addressed. That's always a hit with the evangelical crowd. Woman came from man, woman as the cause of original sin, animals in the ark, etc etc. It's very much a children's story.

Because the OT is incredibly vie, cruel, barbaric and sadistic, it's a "hard sell" when you're pretending your religion is about love.

>pic
Are you saying that the people who built the pyramid measured the speed of light that precisely. Adopted a 360 degree measurement system for angles. Applied it to our agreement of the poles of the earth and placed them in that location? With the extremely small margin for error you'd have to estimate the north pole with. Without a compass because the magnetic pole and the pole we use for the maps differ.
Come on. It's not even measured in radians. If it were radians that'd be a spooky coincidence.

Really. This is one hell of a prank if it were true. I'm surprised people who believe this stuff aren't laughing their asses off when explaining.

He's a schizophrenic LARPer who thinks he is literally God, why would you waste your time responding to his posts?

I got a genuine laugh out of this post. Thank you user.

>Are you saying that the people who built the pyramid measured the speed of light that precisely.

Not at all, mortals had nothing to do with setting the great pyramid's latitude to the speed of light to six figures. That's why they're called gods.

youtube.com/watch?v=3tCvPHozwZw

Can someone please explain why The Old Testament is accepted in Catholic Doctrine but not in other christian denomenations?

Does God have high functioning autism?

the real jews are black people from black fathers. the bible does not apply to everybody

It's accepted in all of them, what are you talking about? Catholics also avoid bringing up the terrible parts of the OT and focus mostly on the love sermons of the NT.

>. God was just trying to set up some ground rules for this nice little place he created for us to live rent free, and then we go and did the exact shit he told us not to fucking do.
This does not really compute becaise on His infinite wisdom He must have foreseen the treachery of the snake and the chain of events that started from the plating of the forbidden tree. He really can't blame humans for a mistake he set up to happen in the first place.

>He's a schizophrenic LARPer who thinks he is literally God

No, I am literally God - you are literally nobody who will be missed in the afterlife.

youtube.com/watch?v=Ae6TF2GIzVQ

Is god all knowing? Didnt adam and eves eating of the apple catch him by surprise?

He claims to be all-knowing but is often "surprised" or has his mind changed by discussion with mere humans.

So why those units then?
The position of the pyramid doesn't make sense unless you use metric measurements and degrees instead of radians.
A significant mathematical correlation is in the geometry or through some other constant. It's location on the earth should be relatable to some more primitive thing. Like radians.
Really if you're gonna use metric and degrees you need to ascribe religious meaning to these things.

I don't find it feasible that godlike creatures would plop down structures based on something that meaningless.
You're never gonna convince anyone but absolute idiots like this.
Where's the harm?
>schizo
Speculated or shown?

Oh, sorry, I was unaware of that fact, I am a catholic and have very limited knowledge of protestants, save for my erroneous assumption that they reject the OT. Thankyou for clarifying the matter for me.

>Speculated or shown?
Judge for yourself >I am literally God

There's no real difference between Catholics and most Protestants, except for the Pope of course. You'd have to dig pretty deep to find any theological disputes between them, and some Protestant denominations, such as the Church of England, are essentially in full communion with Catholicism, again with the obvious exception of rejecting the Pope.

I'd judge that as someone taking on a persona.

Okay, have fun talking to a schizophrenic larper then. Don't be upset that you get nothing but nonsense from him.

I frequent /dpt/ on /g/.
I doubt a schizophrenic person can beat them in nonsense.

An idiot can blather nonsense, but a schizophrenic blathers meaningless nonsense.

Hm, so basically they're all the same with regards to most matters with the exception of rejecting the authority of the pope?

>I don't find it feasible that godlike creatures would plop down structures based on something that meaningless.

God is an omnipresent, intergalactic, extra-3-space "spirit" entity that can form a "symbiosis" with the nervous systems of mortal animals - that is how the Great Pyramid arrived at these coordinates and how Shakespeare has a quote fortelling it 100's of years before humans had any concept of the "speed of light."

youtube.com/watch?v=W5HCSNnUdys

Basically yes. There are some denominations with very divergent theology, like the Quakers, but most Protestants are essentially sede vacantist Catholics in all but name.

Happy with that nonsensical gibberish "answer"? Go on, ask him some more questions, let's see how close he can get to making a comprehensible reply.

Oh but you see they're not idiots. They're worse than that.
This gal forms coherent sentences. She has seen that the speed of light in metric units and seconds correlates with the latitude in degrees.
But I'm obviously not gonna keep replying if he's just repeating himself. That's just not entertaining. I'm interested in the explanations people can try to come up with. I'm not expecting miracles. Just an attempt.
Well he has lost my interest. Because he did repeat himself.
But I would like to add that you could introduce damaged people to worse things than math. I certainly consider history and religion worse topics to deal with than math.
On our board we have our own schizophrenic of sorts. He doesn't directly participate but he's regarded as interesting and they play with him. Too much imo.
I don't find it wrong to challenge a schizophrenic on their beliefs though.

>I don't find it wrong to challenge a schizophrenic on their beliefs though
Wrong, no, pointless, yes. You can't talk someone out of a psychotic delusion.

I wasn't aiming to cure.
I've just come to think of how they've treated that guy. As far as I know he's missing right now. Through no direct intervention of /g/ I think.
I just don't like to think I'd hurt this guy.
>pointless
I don't believe that. Maybe in this context. Something lead him in this direction to begin with.

What on earth are Quakers? like.. the oats? Please explain what are quakers. not interested enough to google them

I don't understand why this was moved to his. It's discussing a book.

Jesus is a better author than Moses.
Cannot judge G-D by these authors.

Yes, like the oats. They're basically pseudo-gnostics, they believe you can experientially access "the living Jesus within", thru meditation and contemplation. For the most part they dedicate themselves to charity and are strict pacifists, they think emulating Jesus is the true purpose of Christianity and so eschew churches and priests and such other pagan fetishes.

It's sad how schizos get mocked and baited, but OTOH this particular schizo shits up every single thread with his sub-retarded videos and beyond moronic comments, so fuck him.

hey thanks g-d

>Happy with that nonsensical gibberish "answer"?

My statement is completely cogent - your statement is an ad hominem.

>I don't find it wrong to challenge a schizophrenic on their beliefs though.

I'm not schizophrenic, I have no problem with someone addressing statements I make. Most people just throw insults though.

Everyone on this planet knows God is an omnipresent spirit being.

youtube.com/watch?v=Jk37KJDslhY

>The God of the Old Testament is arguably the most unpleasant character in all fiction: jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully!

It is not God you should hate but The Father and christians

Mods banned me because apartently this topic was "fan-fiction".

>I have no problem with someone addressing statements I make
Well let's see, shall we?
>extra-3-space "spirit" entity
What does this mean?
>God is
How do you know this?
>can form a "symbiosis" with the nervous systems of mortal animals
How do you know THIS, and what experimental observations can be taken to prove it?
> that is how the Great Pyramid arrived at these coordinates
Even if everything you said before this had any meaning at all, it doesn't even begin to answer user's question.
>Shakespeare has a quote fortelling it
Foretelling what? The speed of light? the coordinates of teh pyramid? God being a 3-space spirit being?

I eagerly await your nonsensical schizophrenese.

Veeky Forums's admins are cunts who don't follow the rules, they ban threads about teh Bible even tho they objectively belong on Veeky Forums, and they ban threads on Ayn Rand's "books", even tho again that is the correct board for them.

the bible is not literature

Of course it is you moron. What else could it be, a table? A car? Maybe it's a video game?

a religious text.

>videogame
>interactive media
Perhaps it is. Considering the additions and changes.

>text
So its literature. Glad you agree.

a manuscript

>can form a "symbiosis" with the nervous systems of mortal animals
How do you know THIS, and what experimental observations can be taken to prove it?

Because I have observed it control my nervous system and the nervous systems of other animals. Even when I was an atheist - though at the time I thought I was the victim of a massive number of horrific coincidences. For example, back in 2011 I mentioned Japanese Internment on Facebook and 11 minutes later there was a 9.0 quake in Japan that killed 15,000 people.

You can observe God control the nervous systems of humans yourself:

youtube.com/watch?v=k3VSRSJYjzs

>God is
> How do you know this?

Because it is observed. What precisely it is, I don't know, but I know it is. I have observed "bird" exists - I don't need to do any tests to know bird exists. I don't know what "bird" is, first I have to capture and examine it to know what it is - but I have no idea how to capture "bird."

>extra-3-space "spirit" entity
>What does this mean?

It means that according to special relativity time and distance are illusions of existence at sub-light speeds in 3-space.

There is a superhuman human entity present - but only its effects are observable - not its "material substantive being" - unless its material being is dark matter and energy but even that is not really observable by humans - only its effects - therefore it must reside somewhere outside the 3-space realm that mortal physiology can observe.

Mind you, this is the consensus of most of the world prior to the Bible - pretty much all descriptions of the gods by all the peoples of the planet are indistinguishable from reality such that they are describing a spirit being. "God of storms, god of agriculture, god of wisdom, god of love, god of war, god of the sun, god of the mountains, etc"

>HURR
If it's a book with words in it, it's literature. Doesn't matter oif the words are a religious text, or poetry, or Dr fucking Suess, words plus book = literature.

No problem Rock head.
Thanks for the Photos.

Peace

Peace

you should buy a dictionary and look at what those words mean

Your analysis is very surface level and literal. Think a little deeper and you will love God right from Genesis.

Maybe reading the story from different angles might help too, like in the Quran and Torah as well.

Stop being such an obtuse faggot, of course a religious book, which is the basis of religious belief, deserves to be on the humanities board instead of the literature board.

>For example, back in 2011 I mentioned Japanese Internment on Facebook and 11 minutes later there was a 9.0 quake in Japan that killed 15,000 people.
Firstly, so what, secondly, how does this even SUGGEST a symbiotic being attached to your nervous system?
>Because it is observed
You've SEEN God, with your own eyes? But isn't he a spirit? Aren't spirits invisible?
>It means that according to special relativity time and distance are illusions of existence at sub-light speeds in 3-space
No. I have no clue where you got this "idea", but it wasn't from relativity.
>There is a superhuman human entity present - but only its effects are observable - not its "material substantive being" - unless its material being is dark matter and energy but even that is not really observable by humans - only its effects - therefore it must reside somewhere outside the 3-space realm that mortal physiology can observe
So God IS unobservable, but you've seen him like you can see a bird? And if he exists outside of our spacetime, how can he form a symbiosis with something that exists INSIDE our spacetime?
>Mind you, this is the consensus of most of the world prior to the Bible
This is staggeringly wrong and arrogant. Read a book.

>If I eat that fruit, will I die?
>It would be extremely painful
>You're a big God
>I AM

You gave a little bit of a false dilemma there with the either God is all knowing or he's crazy.

Why do those have to be the only two options in your line of thinking?

peace g-d

Purgatory and Christ’s misadventures in hell are pretty big theological disputes

Yes, old and new testament god are quite different. So much so that there's actually a form of Christianity (gnosticism) that preaches that they are two different entities, with the old testament god being misguided or evil and the new testament god being the true divine being. Or at least that's my limited understanding of gnosticism, I might be wrong, I keep meaning to read up on them more.

> For example, back in 2011 I mentioned Japanese Internment on Facebook and 11 minutes later there was a 9.0 quake in Japan that killed 15,000 people.
>Firstly, so what, secondly, how does this even SUGGEST a symbiotic being attached to your nervous system?

Because were it not so I would not be capable of unwitting premonitory behavior - and yet I have observed this on multiple occasions - including for years when I was an atheist.

One thing to note is I used the phrase "Executive Order 9066" (the designation of the US Government order for internment) not "Japanese Internment." This was years before I started a subreddit for The Imperial Cult and realized God is real.

Another example is a mod I made for Skyrim back in 2013 about an imprisoned immortal servant of Tiber Septim - I had no idea I would become a theist after starting a subreddit for the Imperial Cult of Rome in 2016 when I made this mod:

youtube.com/watch?v=PQgxdrhjhKQ

youtube.com/watch?v=udZK_F7X-pA

>You've SEEN God, with your own eyes? But isn't he a spirit? Aren't spirits invisible?

I have seen effects that make it utterly clear to anyone who is not in denial or stupid that indicate there is no other conclusion other than a superhuman entity.

>So God IS unobservable, but you've seen him like you can see a bird?

Yes, I've seen him like you can see a bird.

> And if he exists outside of our spacetime, how can he form a symbiosis with something that exists INSIDE our spacetime?

I have no idea - the natural proposition that God is extant and not what the Bible describes is inherently "antisemitic" so it's doubtful I could draw the attention of any agencies of authority to engage in further research on this.

All I know is my observations and interpretation aren't wrong.

Peace
Peace
Peace
Peace

By all means find me a definition of literature that EXCLUDES the Bible.

Why? Because you say so? A thread about religion belongs here, a thread about the Bible belongs on Veeky Forums.

Because otherwise he is evil. So you pick, is he a liar, is he crazy, or is he evil?

You are retarded, period.

Not really. Purgatory is pretty nonsensical and not supported by the Bible, but in practise it's irrelevant since most Protestants AND Catholics think good people go straight to heaven and bad people go straight to hell, it only becomes problematic when talking about good people who lived before Jesus.
>Christ’s misadventures in hell
You mean teh Harrowing of Hell? Pretty sure even Catholics consider that story apocryphal, and I'm sure there are Protestants who accept it. But again, its hardly important, it's the kind of irrelevant unprovable fluff that people kill one another over but if doesn't actually affect the practice of the religion in any way.

uh bro you absolutely can walk into a church and ask questions. part of their mission is to spread the word. if you come in with your own no-bs honest to goodness questions in good faith, somebody will help you.

>Because were it not so I would not be capable of unwitting premonitory behavio
But you didn't have a premonition, you mentioned Japan and then some time later there was an earthquake, there is no connection between the two and EVEN YOU didn't see it as a premonition until AFTER the fact!
>One thing to note is I used the phrase "Executive Order 9066" (the designation of the US Government order for internment) not "Japanese Internment."
Literally so what? Does "Executive Order 9066" mean "there's going to be an earthquake"? No? then who cares what term you used.
>Another example is a mod I made for Skyrim back in 2013 about an imprisoned immortal servant of Tiber Septim
Again, what? Nothing about that mod even HINTS that there is a real god, immortality exists within the TES universe.

You see this is why you get no traction with your evangelism, what constitutes "proof" for you is wildly divergent with what psychotypical humans consider to be proof. All you have is non sequiteurs.

>I have seen effects
>Yes, I've seen him like you can see a bird.
Which is it? You've inferred he exists from some variant of the argument from design, or you've seen him like you can see a bird?

>But you didn't have a premonition, you mentioned Japan and then some time later there was an earthquake

I didn't say it was a "premonition" - I said it was premonitory behavior - one incident among many many incidents - not all of which I can show you. I can't prove that screenshot is authentic - but it nevertheless is. I can show you other fortuitous quakes.

For example, I made a joke about the eucharist being a scarlet letter which was followed within the day by a quake in Hawethorn Nevada.

Here is a link to an archived copy of my joke about the Eucharist being a Scarlett letter (for human sacrifice): archive.is/p20Th

You can verify the time is correct by hovering over the "1 year ago" on the reddit post.

> Again, what? Nothing about that mod even HINTS that there is a real god, immortality exists within the TES universe.

The point is the main character of the mod is a 1000's of year old servant of the God-Emperor Tiber Septim - he directly commands the Imperial Guard and Blades - imprisoned in a dwemer ruin I added on top of the "Throat of the World." I made the mod in 2013 - I started a subreddit for the Imperial Cult of Rome in early 2016. I became a theist in September of 2016. I decided there was no other explanation for the events in my life I had witnessed other than I am a god on December 24th of 2016.

When I was a little kid I asked God to give me knowledge and wisdom "like King Solomon."

It's been a long road my life...

youtube.com/watch?v=QEn5QnM3lXE

simply love these god threads my creatures are funny

>For example, I made a joke about the eucharist being a scarlet letter which was followed within the day by a quake in Hawethorn Nevada
This is a classic example of a "knights move" thought process, whihc confirms that despite your protestations you are, in fact, a schizophrenic. Why do you deny it when it's so obvious? Are you afraid of being dismissed as a lunatic? because I hate to break it to you, but that happens anyway.
>The point is the main character of the mod is a 1000's of year old servant of the God-Emperor Tiber Septim - he directly commands the Imperial Guard and Blades - imprisoned in a dwemer ruin I added on top of the "Throat of the World." I made the mod in 2013 - I started a subreddit for the Imperial Cult of Rome in early 2016. I became a theist in September of 2016. I decided there was no other explanation for the events in my life I had witnessed other than I am a god on December 24th of 2016.
>I decided there was no other explanation for the events in my life I had witnessed other than I am a god on December 24th of 2016.
I mean this speaks for itself.