21 / MtF tranny / 5'6" / 26.5 BMI

>21 / MtF tranny / 5'6" / 26.5 BMI
>extremely introverted with severe social anxiety resistant to therapy and medications
>super paranoid about people looking at me and generally assume that everybody is staring at me and is out to get me even though the rational part of me knows that's dumb as fuck
>want to get back in shape like I used to be before I came to college in the big city
>grew up in a hicktown
>used to be able to jog in the country and do shit on a pullup bar at the local school at dusk
>city I live in is super unsafe at night and has no quiet places I can go during the day to do my own thing
>can't afford to go to a gym, and I know I'd be freaked out by exercising in front of other human beings
>live in a shitty studio apartment with my fiancee, so buying a used treadmill for cardio is out of the question, but I'm already doing stuff that doesn't require equipment
What should I do? I know I'm messed up in the head in more ways than one, but there's got to be some other poorfag recluses on this board who have been in similar situations.
>inb4 just go jogging outside and exercise in front of other people, you stupid freak

>pic unrelated

just go jogging outside and exercise in front of other people, you stupid freak


Seriously, do some bodyweight programs, like that trap mode pic.
But why a MtF tranny wants to do excercise? Did you got fat or just want to be skinnier?

Does your fiancee give a shit about this?

I'm skinnyfat and I want to nip this in the bud. My fiancee just wants me to be happy regardless of how I look or how fit I am. I hate myself and know that my self-image will always be shit, so I devote all my time to making her happy and improving myself. I know my brain is fucked up beyond salvation, but I can at least try to be healthy and look good for her, right?

>I'm skinnyfat and I want to nip this in the bud.
Oh, OOOOOOOH.

OK, then keep on losing weight and get skinnier but start doing some dumbbells so you don't go auswitch mode.
>My fiancee just wants me to be happy regardless of how I look or how fit I am.
Nice, hope you become a really happy couple and wish you the best in your relationship though.

>I hate myself and know that my self-image will always be shit, so I devote all my time to making her happy and improving myself. I know my brain is fucked up beyond salvation, but I can at least try to be healthy and look good for her, right?
Well, yeah, you can improve yourself as well but remember that your beloved loves you lots as well, so don't be too hard on yourself, alright?

Just start getting skinnier, go low bodyfat%, like around 12% or something so your legs and ass look good but you gotta hit some bodyweight routines, like LOTS of squats so your ass get plumpy.

Just giving you a very small idea, don't know much about it but just be careful with hormones and that shit, since it actually harms your body really bad if you do some research here and there.

But you can look female and all if you take care of your skin to make it smooth, also wash your hair well to make it soft and watch your routine, stop eating shit on a can or bag (soda, potato chips, etc.)

Have a nice exercise, you're gonna make it (in a different way).

>extremely introverted with severe social anxiety resistant to therapy and medications
>live in a shitty studio apartment with my fiancee

how the fuck did you find someone with those conditions if you can't even function in society?

trip on trappy

Get a jump rope and skip in one place just outside your building, if theres stranger danger you can not have your phone/wallet on you and just run inside

well no shit
you have mental illness and nobody realizes you do

you need treatment for gender identity disorder, not your anxiety, what the fuck do you think where it comes from?

I'd be fucking anxious and paranoid too if I convinced myself and everyone else that I should wear women's clothes every day and be called "she"

Get therapy. Walk more. Eat less. Hating yourself isn't healthy and will make you harder for your fiancee to love way more than having a shitty body ever will.

How do I get a trans gf?

Is there a particular dating app they tend to use or are they all just pretending to be cis girls to snare the straight guys?

Move to the city. Invest in your trans self. I interact with them on a daily basis and trust me it will pay off financially. You'll probably have to suck some cocks but any trans I know that are poor are usually just lazy druggies. The smart ones are on tv acting or some guys sugarmomma...or is is sugar daddy. I'm not sure about that one but cheer up. Trans are in high demand here in America. You're a hot commodity

>assume that everybody is staring at me
No one gives a fuck. Took me 10 years to realize my anxiety is ridiculous, because people mostly care about themselves and couldn't give a flying fuck if you don't look like a freak. Since you say you're mtf, I assume, you don't look like a man in drag, but at worst just a ugly woman. And ugly women get even less attention than average folks, lol.

ikr
even pretend women have it easier
I look normal, am tall and athletic, but no one can find me in my basement

Into the trash it goes

>but at worst just a ugly woman
lmao

>transbians

>me
>transbian

ewww

I'm the second case, but I know a lot of girls like me use grindr/tinder/craigslist.

>What should I do?
It doesn't matter what you do. Statistically, you'll kill yourself before you turn 30.

>you will die eventually so why even live

NEET: The post

Yes, I'll die, but I've got more than 5-10 years of life left

Not if you continue living like you are rn.