Gym falcon laid eggs in the sauna again

>Be in the gym.
>Doing 150 pound tricep pull downs.
>tri'slookinhuge.mpeg
>See the door open.
>Gym rival walks in.
>5'5 king of manlets.
>Triceps like a Greek God.
>This dude is literally 80% triceps, 20% water, and 100% steaming pile of cunt.
>Cardio bunnies call him "The Tricepatops".
>I fucking hate this glorified rugrat
>No words to describe my tricep jealousy.
>He waddles past me as I'm on my last rep.
>"Wow user, keep this up and you might be able to weighted dips"
>I can hear the gym twinks giggling by the squat plugs.
>I cant let this fucker ruin my twink reputation.
>"Dammit Tricepatops, you know full well I can out dip you any day!"
>"Please user, with small triceps like those I bet you couldn't even jerk me off."
>Isthatachallenge.avi
>With the force of at least 150 pounds I tricep pull down his Nike basket ball shorts.
>He is already 100% erect.
>I call him a faggotron and get to work on his manlet donger.
>He is taken back by my incredible agility
>Everyone in the gym is watching as I reach Mach speed.
>His blood and tears are my lubricant.
>"user! stop! Please! you don't know what your doing!"
>It's too late now I can feel his 4" benis throbbing in my hand.
>Canyousmellwhatthecockiscooking.gif
>Tri-ceratops explodes in a volcano of man milk.
>I catch every drop and swallow it whole.
>I gotta meet my protien macros.
>Everyone cheers.
>I spit on him and tell him I'm the head honcho now.
>With tears running down his face Tri-ceratops scurried towards the fire exit and vanished.
>tfw this was two weeks ago.
>tfw havent seen him since.

And that my friends is how I defeated my gym rival.

How was this presented in /tv/?

>someone peed in the manlet pit again

>the Gym Manlet accidentally broke the stilts
>the stilts will be under maintenance until monday
How the fuck am I supposed to do cardio now?

It's my lucky day, someone left their change in the plate dispenser.

7.75/10

You sure showed that faggot. I'm proud of you user

Bros I'm pretty nervous
>Buttpad broke today, leaving my tooshie open to unwelcome guests
>Locker rape has been at an all time low, not too worried, I'll just grab a rental pad
>Get there, as I'm walking in an old guy hobbles past in nothing but a towel, cursing and clutching his asshole
>Turns out the gym had to cut the rental pads because of budget problems
>Nervous
>Go into the locker room, see some manlet beta get pulled behind a shower curtain, screams cut off
>Bunch of chads in the corner staring at me, whispering to each other
>One whistles as I walk by
Bros, what should I do?
I'm just sitting in the lobby...
Should I just cut my losses and leave my stuff in the locker room?

Strap dumbbells to your feet, manlet.

dont you have omni-rings in your heath centre

why didn't you just do the dip contest?

>Not sucking down a female's fart to get the extra oxygen needed for the boost on your last rep.

whatre you, a pussy? user got challenged to a jerk off not a dip

>Manual squat plug inspection day
>Haven't cleaned mine in a week
>fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck
>Try to 360 and walk out, but the Gymcop looks at me sternly, and puts his hand on his gun...
>Fuck
>Chad and Stacies all lined up
>Have custom squat plugs
>Bedazzled, spiked, some shoot flames, some vibrate
>All squeaky clean
>Inspector gets to me, nose already wrinkled from the smell of my gymbag
>Slowly pull out my stained, smelly squat plugs
>Fuck
>Mandatory squat plug maintenance class, 400$ fine, and three month ban from the gym
Goddammit.

>Be me, lanklet
>Done with workout
>Decide to go for a swim in the gympool
>mfw enjoying a pool filled with cardiobunnys while manlets have to use a filthy puddle outside of the gym

take the dick like a man user

Try to impress the chads by raping another manlet

fuckin fascist gymcops. things have been much better at my gym since the revolution

The manlet breeder ran out today, theres no more to rent

fuck user im dying

Some communists from the crossfit part of the gym tried recently, and they all got a oneway ticket to snap city.
They kept their bodies up on the wall for 3 days as a message.

poor bastards. once your gymgoers reach enlightenment and seize the means of muscle production all will be well for you user, and you will lift in a glorious musclebound utopia

Guys, are manlets protected under the geneva convention? I.e would it be legal to set up a organ donation business?

>he doesnt run an illegal 3D bioprinted organ shop from his mom's basement
get out you proletariate

At least in Europe you'll have to inform that the organs you're donating are from manlets.
I got my third heart in the mail a couple of weeks ago to increase my blood flow only to find out it was a poorly functioning manlet heart. I'm still waiting for the refund.

10/10 story telling.
This needs a show with a while original cast of muscle-influenced characters. Riley the Bicexual ogre, Juan the Thighwanese trap, and Chesterson the Butler (Alfred's lifting alter ego).

5/10, but you have good potential

Bro under the open manlet reduction act of 2013, you're legally considered a manlet.
I wouldn't tell too many people about this.

>Manlet pit closed for monthly power washing
>Manlets running loose all over the gym
>Takes four fucking hours to get a curl rack

New squat racks don't have ashtrays

2 funny tbqh lad

>Some guy brought a bunch of his own 25s to the gym
>Totally fucks up the plate exchange rate
>Have to convert 6 25s to 24 5s to 2 45s and a 10 in change just to bench 1pl8

The fucking Manlet Awareness League needs to be gassed, these things don't have feelings.
I hate manlets so fucking much.

>Go to gym today.
>Left quarter to unlock plate cart, had to go back to car (cold as fuck).
>Found out all the regular bars were on loan to the gym a few towns over.
>Had to use the manlet bar.
>5'10.5" so just over manlet cutoff.
>Gym jester starts laughing at me as I'm warming up my squats in the power tub.
>Throws confetti at me every time I butt wink.
>AlmondsActivated.emu
>Tell him to fuck off, push him lightly to show I'm not a beta.
>He trips over a spare squatting skateboard.
>Rolls backwards into the plate cart.
>45#s crush his chest.
>Police are called, get arrested for assaulting gym jester and illegal use of manlet bar.
>Now I have to do 100 hours of community service at the gym, putting plate carts back and oiling the cardio windmill.
>MFW

>Gym took the calculators off the wall for calculating how much weight the hole in the plates accounted for
I can literally feel my gains draining

>Cardio bunny sets up in front of my squat rack, starts stretching
>Downward dog, in yoga pants
>Fuck
>Erection detector on wrist starts beeping
>Tackled by 13 volunteer anti rape league members
>Penis confiscated
Not again, motherfucker

>tfw socialist gym
>exceeded the monthly gain limit of 1lb of muscle
>the secret gym police confiscate 20lb of muscle and 5% of my bodyfat

I think it's he's talking about the cinema falcon

>go to gym
>gymcops are there measuring people's heights
>they found out I'm 5'11 even though my gym ID says 6'0
>get thrown into the manlet pit
>finally escape after two hours
>"the gym is closing in 20 minutes"
>skip my warmup sets and go straight to the coin-op plate dispenser
>it's jammed
>gym closes, on the way out get fined for not moving enough weight
Such is life

>Bedazzled, spiked, some shoot flames, some vibrate
>some shoot flames

fucking lost.

Fucking manlet.
This is why manlet pits need hourly greasing, so you little shits dont crawl back out

...Muscles dont fix autism.

>cardio
>stilts

please enlighten me, preferably using MSPaint

...

how do i get a neck like this?
yesterday i was a bout to fuck a girl and but when i took off my scarf she laughed and walked out of the bedroom.

>>
But good work

this is why I come to Veeky Forums

for what purpose anonumoous

You walk in the manlet pit with stilts, if the manlets pull you down you'll become one of them.

>walk into gym with falcon
>see two dyels using bench
>look at falcon
>"i think you know what i want"
>2 minutes later my falcon is spotting me as i PR 3 pl8

Thats a really dry manlet pit.
Someone seriously needs to grease it, or the little cunts will get out.

Good work, autists.
Screen caps where.

user you have no idea how happy you've made me, thank you.

kek?

>out of restroom tokens
>have to go to my car and pee in an empty bottle

Here user, have a (You)

>go to the gym
>my best friend was assigned as the gym comedian
>i didn't laugh hard enough at his show
>currently locked up in the gym fridge because the manletmine was full

what kind of backward rules are that? the gymjester is hanged if he cant make people laugh in my gym, not the people if they dont laugh

>forgot to download my lifts at home
>forced to stream them in low resolution at the gym
>cut my quad on an artifact while deadlifting
>at that instant shitty gym wifi cuts out
>stand there for 20 minutes, blood streaming out, hips screaming
>finally it connects again
>one plate doesn't load, bar not balanced
>have to drop it
>get banned from gym for getting blood everywhere
>didn't even finish my set

>someone didn't recharge the barbell after use
>have to lift without onboard computer
>halfway through rep get incredibly lost on way up
>crash head first into the manlet pit

sorry its so shit Veeky Forums but i had to go out and was in a rush.

Yeah under the genova convention its piss

dude what? shut up retard....

It's 8 feet deep, even if one climbs the shoulders of another still can't get out. It's low but within code.

Thanks for the oblique workout user

Somebody screencap pls

...

>le trollface meme
still pretty good though

>someone stole my squat tokens while I was using the restroom
>have to do my cardio routine a second time to get more
Fuck brehs my gains..

This fucking thread, man

...

Jesus fucking Christ lfmoa